Coming Back Home
by EvaFlack001
Summary: When Laura Cadman returns to Atlantis five years after Carson's death, how will she cope with being back? Pairings include Cadman/Lorne, John/Teyla, Ronon/Keller, Sam/Jack and Cam/Carolyn, Daniel/Vala and SG1. Complete as is. Sequel in progress.
1. Coming Back Home

**Ok, so after a kind anonymous reviewer pointed out the flaws in this, I decided to rewrite it. I am a huge fan of the minor characters on SGA, so I decided to write a nice fluffy fic about two of my favourites, Laura Cadman and Evan Lorne. I think that they are underdeveloped characters, but what's ff for if you can't use your imagination! Pairings in this story include John/Teyla, Ronon/Keller and eventually Cadman/Lorne. **

**This story is set about 5 years after Carson died, and it's Laura's story as she returns to Atlantis for the first time since he was killed. Will feature the rest of the team. **

**Chapter 1. Coming Back Home. **

Laura Cadman stood looking out of the window of her quarters aboard the Daedalus. They were currently in orbit above Atlantis, and Colonel Cauldwell had ordered the crew to be ready to land in ten minutes.

She smoothed down her uniform nervously, taking a deep breath. For what seemed like the millionth time, she checked her hair in the mirror, making sure the blonde tresses were still in a smooth knot at the back of her head.

The last time she'd been aboard the Daedalus, it had been taking her back to Stargate Command, almost five years ago. Things had changed in Atlantis since then, she thought sadly. The last time she'd been there, Carson had been alive and well. They'd kissed goodbye on the beaming platform, promising to see each other again soon.

Carson. Even after all this time, her heart twisted in pain at the thought of the Scottish doctor she'd loved so much. She remembered the time he'd surprised her at Stargate Command with a bunch of flowers and an engagement ring. He'd had three weeks of leave and they'd spent every spare second together, talking and laughing. Kissing. Making promises and planning for the future.

He'd left her with the promise of coming home to get married and then taking her back with him to Atlantis as soon as the Marine Corps would station her there again. She'd cried, of course, but had accepted the parting as she'd been trained to do. Little had she known that she'd never see him again.

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"_Lieutenant? A moment, please." Colonel Cameron Mitchell, leader of SG1 stood outside the explosives lab, his expression sombre. _

"_Of course, sir," Laura said in surprise. She abandoned the Ori explosive device she'd been analysing and stood up, following him out of the room. _

"_Lieutenant, your presence is required in the General's office, " Colonel Mitchell told her. "Immediately." _

"_Yes, sir." _

_She knocked on the door of General Landry's office, waiting for permission to enter. When ordered, she went in and her jaw dropped when she saw Colonel Sheppard sitting in the General's office. _

"_Colonel Sheppard!" She snapped to attention again, colouring a little at her lack of respect. The Atlantis military contingent was a little different to the one here at Stargate Command, in that they didn't tend to be quite as strict as their Milky Way counterparts. "What are you doing here, sir?" _

"_At ease, Cadman." John Sheppard raked a hand through his shaggy black hair and looked at her. "In fact, why don't you take a seat." _

"_Yes sir." Laura sat down, her heart suddenly pounding. "Sir, has something happened? Is everyone in Atlantis ok?" _

_John sighed and shook his head slowly. "Cadman, there was an accident. An explosion." _

_Laura sat up straight in her chair. "Sir, what are you saying?" _

"_Carson…"John watched as she shook her head violently. "Cadman. Laura, there was nothing we could do. He was trying to save a patient, and the explosion…I'm so sorry." _

"_He's gone?" Laura asked, feeling as if she were watching the scene unfold from outside her body. "Carson?" _

_A knock sounded on the door and Major Evan Lorne entered at John's bidding, followed by Rodney McKay and Ronon Dex. The scientist's eyes were red rimmed, his face pale. He greeted Laura sombrely and sat in the chair opposite her. _

"_We're taking his body back to Scotland," Colonel Sheppard was saying. "Rodney's going to tell his mom…" _

"_Sir, may I be excused?" Laura stood up, feeling as if she would explode if she stayed in the room any longer. "Please?" _

"_We've arranged with General Landry for you to accompany us to the funeral," Sheppard told her, his green eyes watching her warily. Across the room, Evan Lorne sat uncomfortably, his dark eyes unreadable. "Cadman, your orders are to take three days leave and come with us, then see Dr Lam and her team for assessment when you get back." _

"_Yes sir." Laura replied in a monotone. "I'll go get ready." _

_She took three steps and turned around. "Colonel?" _

"_Yes, Lieutenant?" _

"_Did he suffer?" _

"_No. No, he didn't. It was over immediately." _

_Laura nodded, the numbness spreading over her. She looked at Rodney. "He was going to ask you to be best man." _

_Rodney's head snapped up. "He was what?" _

_Silently, Laura pulled out her dog tags to reveal the white gold and diamond engagement ring Carson had given her hanging on the chain. "He gave me this. We were going to tell everyone together when I went to Atlantis next month. " _

"_He loved you," Rodney said suddenly. "He told me that you made him happier than he'd ever been." _

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Laura drew in her breath at the memory of the three days that had followed; the plane journey to Scotland, knowing Carson's body was in the cargo hold; the anguished sobbing of Carson's mother when Rodney had broken the news; the feeling of emptiness as she got on the plane to return home.

She thought of the way her quarters seemed to close in on her, making her breathless and dizzy.

"_Cadman?" Evan Lorne's voice outside her door made her fight to breathe properly. "Open the door." _

"_Major," she wheezed. "Help me." _

Lorne had shouldered the door until it burst open with a bang, scooped her up and carried her to the infirmary. There, Dr Lam had given her a swift check up and administered a mild sedative to help her to breathe easier and to sleep.

She had woken up to see Cameron Mitchell sitting at the foot of her bed along with Sheppard and Lorne. The Atlantis contingent was to return home that day. Laura had looked down at the ring on her left hand and the tears had finally come. Lorne had taken her hand and held it tightly, while Mitchell passed her a Kleenex. They'd said nothing, just sat with her while she curled on her side and sobbed for hours. Finally, Dr Lam had taken pity on her and upped the sedative so that she slept.

She'd never gotten to walk up the aisle. Never gotten to become Mrs Beckett and spend her life with Carson as she'd promised. Instead, she'd gotten another gift, one she'd never expected to get.

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"_So, Laura," Carolyn Lam peered at her over the rim of her dark glasses. "Colonel Mitchell said you fainted today. Have you had anything to eat?" _

_Laura shook her head with a wan smile. "I haven't been feeling so great for the past few days." _

"_Really?" Dr Lam eyed her. "In what way?" _

"_Mostly dizzy, and a little sick. Some headaches, but I'm not sleeping so well. And my appetite is gone. But that's gone since…" _

"_For the last month, then," Dr Lam interjected with a sympathetic smile. "Laura, it's normal to go through this. You've suffered a huge loss. Nobody could expect you to be ok after just four weeks."_

"_So they tell me." _

"_I'm going to take some blood and run a few tests, just to make sure it's nothing to worry about," Dr Lam said with another smile. "It won't hurt a bit." _

_Everything hurt, Laura thought but she didn't say it. The pain never stopped. _

_Dr Lam called her back in an hour, her face grave. "Blood results are in." _

"_And?" Laura sat up in her chair, her face pale. "What's wrong with me?" _

"_Laura, I don't know how to tell you this," Carolyn sighed. _

"_I'm a Marine," Laura told her. "The best way is to just tell me. I can handle it." _

"_You're pregnant." _

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"Mama?" She looked down into the blue eyes of her daughter and smiled. Cara was showing signs of being exactly like her father. She had the same eyes, the same smile and the same brown hair. She was, Laura thought fondly, the best possible mixture of them both.

At just four years old, Cara Cadman Beckett was the centre of her mother's world, and she was quite used to hanging around the Stargate Base on the Cheyenne Mountain. She could talk about the Ori and the Wraith as well as any Marine or soldier on the base, and knew that she shouldn't talk about it to anyone other than the people she recognised.

"Mama?"

"Yes, baby?"

"Are we home yet?" Cara demanded.

"Look out there," Laura replied, pointing to the central spire of Atlantis. "That's your new home."

Stargate Command had realised, with the arrival of Teyla's son, Torrin, that if they were to establish a permanent post in the City that the regulations would have to be revised. As a result, marriages and even children were now permitted in Atlantis. There was a wall in General Landry's office comprising photographs of all the Atlantean children and the numerous marriages that had taken place in the last four years.

Cara furrowed her brow. "Mama, why are you sad? It looks pretty!"

"It's beautiful," Laura answered, hugging her daughter tightly, wishing she wouldn't grow up so fast. "And you're going to like living here."

"Do the soldiers here know Daddy?"

"They did," Laura answered, feeling the familiar ache at the mention of Carson. "They loved him as much as I did."

"Will they love me?" Cara asked, her eyes widening. "What if they don't?"

"They'll love you, baby," Laura assured her. "Now, let's go and find Colonel Cauldwell, its time to go down."

"In the beam?" Cara clapped her hands at the thought. "I like the beam!"

Laura checked her hair again, and took Cara by the hand. "You look very pretty, Cara Beckett. They're going to love you."

"You look pretty too," Cara offered her mother a sunny grin. "Come on, Mama. We'll miss the beam!"

**Ok, so I rewrote it and made it a little easier on myself. Please let me know if you like. And if you don't like. Reviews are like balm to my soul!**


	2. Settling In

**Ok, so after rewriting chapter one, I've decided to keep going with this one. Even if nobody reads it it's going to be out of my brain and I'll be able to get on with my other stuff! **

**Andromedamarine: I hope you mean sad as in tear jerking!**

**Anonymous: How about a pen name next time? Thanks a mil for the review, it was really helpful. I had a proper look and revised it to make it slightly easier to write. Lorne is definitely in love with her but she doesn't know it. He'll come to love Cara too. I'm a huge Lorne fan I think he's great!**

**Sachita: Thank you and I appreciate you reading it! **

**Navyflightnurse: Are you really a flight nurse cos that is so cool. I'm Irish and I can't imagine being in the American military or Navy, it's such a great thing to do. I don't think I'd have the guts to face what they do. Sorry about the typo, it was indeed meant to be Laura!**

**Chapter 2. Settling In. **

John Sheppard watched as the transport beam from the Daedalus activated and eight new bodies appeared in front of him. An amused smile played across his lips as he watched the faces react to their surroundings.

It was always the same, he thought with a satisfied sigh. That same look of shock, followed by a mixture of awe and fear as they took in the huge room at the centre of Atlantis. They always looked first at the control room, and then swung around to look at the Gate. He knew they were mentally comparing it to the one at home on Earth.

God, he loved his job.

"More new meat?" Major Evan Lorne, his second in command, asked with a grin. "Should we introduce them to Ronon now, while they're still in shock from the transporter beam?"

John laughed. "Ronon will put the fear of God in these guys. And women," he added, spotting three women among the new Marines. "He generally doesn't discriminate."

"I think that Captain Douglas would agree with you," Lorne said with a chuckle. "He kicked her ass during practice yesterday."

"Good for them," John said glibly. "It'll toughen them up." He watched as Lorne strode down the steps and issued a few sharp orders. The new recruits immediately filed down the corridor and headed for their assigned quarters.

"I'll do the first debrief," Lorne volunteered with a roll of his eyes. "Let me know if there's anything else."

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Laura took Cara's hand firmly in hers. "Don't let go, ok sweetheart? I don't want you to get lost."

"I won't, Mama. I promise."

Before she could even smile down at Cara, she was standing in the Gate Room of Atlantis. She blinked and immediately looked down at Cara, who was giggling. "You ok?"

"That was fun, Mama. Can we do it again?"

Laura laughed. "Not right now. Why don't we go and find Colonel Sheppard and find our rooms."

"Welcome back, Lieutenant." John stood behind her, smiling at her. "Good to see you. And welcome, Miss Beckett." He hunkered down and smiled at Cara, who dimpled back at him.

"Say hello to Colonel Sheppard," Laura instructed her daughter. "He's my boss. Good to be back, sir."

"She looks like Carson," John told her, his eyes giving her a brief once over before coming back to rest on Cara. "She's got his eyes."

"She does," Laura agreed with a fond smile at her daughter, who was eyeballing a burly Marine standing guard at the Gate. "Cara, stop staring."

"He stared first," Cara pointed out, earning a snort of laughter from John and a mortified look from Laura.

"She's very...honest," Laura said ruefully. "She got that from me. Cara is sorely lacking in her father's tact, I'm afraid."

"Well, we can't all be perfect," John joked. "I'll have one of my guys show you to your quarters. Debrief in one hour."

"Sir?" Laura questioned as he turned to leave. "What about Cara?"

"Take her to the Daycare wing," John ordered. He grimaced at her blank look. "I'll send Teyla and Keller over to you. They'll explain."

"Yes sir." Laura took Cara's hand. "Sweetie, let's follow Corporal Gates, ok?"

"This way, ma'am." The young man John had ordered to show them to their quarters saluted and turned to march towards the transporter.

Cara trotted after him, bombarding him with questions. Why did he wear that uniform? Why didn't he have a nice one like Mama? What was that funny wire on his face? Could she have one, too? Did he ever fly in a spaceship and get shot down in a light?

Corporal Gates answered all of her questions patiently, and then waved his hand over the sensor outside Laura's room. The door rolled open, revealing a large bedroom and bathroom and an adjacent room for Cara. Their luggage had already been unloaded and was waiting to be unpacked.

"Thank you, Corporal," Laura said with a smile. "We'll manage from here."

"Bye, Gates," Cara hollered from her room. "See you soon!"

Laura looked around her and sighed. "Ok, Cadman. Get to work." She began to open the suitcases she'd brought with her, hanging up clothes and putting Cara's toys in one corner of the room.

A bell pealed through the room and she went to open the door. It swung back to reveal Teyla and Jennifer Keller standing outside, matching smiles on their faces.

"Laura," Teyla said with a warm smile. "It's so good to see you." She touched her forehead to Laura's before throwing her arms around her. "It has been too long."

"I'll say!" Jennifer Keller exclaimed. "It's been almost two years since I was back at Stargate Command! That's too long!"

"And I've missed you," Laura teased, feeling happier now that she'd seen some more familiar faces. "Teyla, you look wonderful."

"Thank you," Teyla said with another smile. Her amber eyes were glowing. "I feel wonderful."

"Pregnancy suits her," Jennifer said with an envious glare. "I just know when my time comes that I'll be one of those misfortunate souls that's sick the whole time."

"I was unwell early on in my pregnancy with Torrin," Teyla reminded the doctor. "I have been fortunate this time."

"I'm sorry I missed your wedding," Laura said, sitting down on one end of the sofa and facing Teyla. "I was working on the Ori destruction weapon. Stargate Command couldn't spare me. Apparently there are no bomb experts in the Marine Corps back at STtargate Command with my experience."

"It was a great day," Jennifer remembered. "I don't think I've ever seen Colonel Sheppard so nervous!"

"I can't believe that the Colonel is married," Laura mused. She blushed. "Sorry, Teyla. I don't mean that I can't believe he married you."

"Everyone so saw that coming," Jennifer interrupted with a roll of her eyes. "It was no surprise. Donahue made a fortune in the betting pool!"

"So did Colonel Mitchell," Laura grinned. "He predicted it right to the day."

"Mama?"

"Cara," Laura beckoned to her daughter. "Come and say hello to Teyla and Jennifer. You remember Colonel Sheppard, right?"

"Yes." Cara stared curiously at Teyla, who smiled at her. "You have a round belly."

"She's making a baby," Jennifer confided to the child, who nodded, eyes solemn. "It's inside her, right there."

"Mama, was I inside your belly too?"

"You certainly were," Laura said with a grimace. "You kicked me the whole time."

"Does your baby have a Daddy?" Cara asked Teyla.

"It does," Teyla told her. "Colonel Sheppard is its father. Would you like to feel him kick?"

When Cara nodded, Teyla took her little hand and placed it on her swollen stomach. "There you go."

Laura watched as Cara's eyes widened and her small face lit up."Cara, you're going to go with Teyla and play with her little boy while Mama goes to meet Colonel Sheppard."

Cara nodded. "Can I take Mo?"

"Mo is her monkey," Laura told Jennifer, who nodded seriously. "He goes everywhere with her."

"Let's go," Teyla said, holding out a hand to Cara, who obediently took it. She followed Teyla out of the room, calling a goodbye to Laura over her shoulder.

Laura immediately grabbed her new uniform out of its plastic wrapper. The standard issue black combat pants and t-shirt made her look pale, she thought with a sigh. She shook her hair free of its knot and tied it into a simple ponytail. Pulling on her boots, she checked the time and cursed. "Crap!"

She tore down the corridor and into the transporter, jabbing at the screen. "Crap, crap, crap!" The beam activated, sending her to the conference room. She flew around the corner and careened straight into something tall and solid.

Yelping a protest, she rubbed her nose and looked up. "Major Lorne!" She immediately stood straight.

"As you were, Lieutenant," he ordered, his deep voice tinged with amusement. "Welcome back."

"Thanks," she said, rubbing her nose again. "Ow."  
"You ok?"

"I'm late," she explained. "I'm meeting Colonel Sheppard. Five minutes ago, in fact."

"Relax, Cadman," Lorne told her. "Things here are different now. We don't run things quite the way that they do at home."

"In what way?" Laura asked as he fell into step beside her and went with her into the conference room.

"Socially, it's completely different," Lorne explained. "I'll show you around later, if you want."

"That would be great," Laura said gratefully. "I feel like it's a completely different place." She smiled. "Cara is having no such trouble. She thinks it's going to be one big adventure."

Lorne smiled gently at her. "It's going to be hard for you, being back here, isn't it?"

Tears filled Laura's eyes, shocking them both. "It is hard," she admitted, blinking furiously. "I haven't been able to come back. But now, well, it feels like the right time."

"Cadman, you're one of the toughest women I know." Lorne spoke firmly. "Now listen to me, Lieutenant. Carson wouldn't want you grieving forever. And he wouldn't want Cara to be anywhere else but here."

She nodded. "Yes, sir."

"Ok." Lorne gave her an encouraging smile. "Go get 'em, Marine!"

She saluted with a grin at his order and entered the conference room. Colonel Sheppard was perched on the edge of the table, talking to Sam Carter.

The blonde woman looked up with a smile at Laura, who saluted sharply and stood at attention. "At ease, Lieutenant." Turning to John, she grinned. "Eager, I see. You've been working back at Stargate Command too long."

Laura blushed. "Sorry, Ma'am." She dropped into the chair Sam indicated she should sit in. "I forgot how things run here."

"It's been a while, "Sam said kindly. "Things are very different here now."

"I can see that," Laura replied with a grimace. "I almost got bowled over by two young boys on my way here."

"Athosian visitors," John explained. "Lorne is flying them back at 21.00."

Sam nodded. "Laura – you don't mind if I call you Laura off duty, do you?"

"No ma'am."

"Ok. Laura, we've requested that you be brought back here to head up your own team. Several of the new planets we've come into contact with have got explosive materials in the ground. Now, they don't mine them, so we took samples and brought them back with us."

"And you want me to test them and see if they could be used as potential defensive weapons," Laura guessed.

"Exactly," Sam agreed. "You're the best, we need the best."

"It's not just me anymore," Laura said. "I have Cara to think about now."

"You won't be off world as often as the other teams," Sam assured her. "And your daughter will be well looked after when you are."

Laura nodded. "I told General O'Neill that I'd give it six months. If Cara settles here, then I'll stay however long you need me to. But if she doesn't settle, then I'm sorry. I'll have to take her home."

"Most of the kids here are happy," Sam said gently. "The Athosian children have taken them in hand and they get along great. But if you don't think that Cara is doing ok, then you can leave. You have my word."

"Thank you, Colonel." Laura stood up when John and Sam did. She turned to leave. "Sir? I really wouldn't mind an off world mission or four. Just to get back into the swing of things."

John grinned and nodded. "I'll let you know when a suitable one comes up. Dismissed."

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Laura knocked on the door of the infirmary and peered in. Jennifer was over in the far corner, administering stitched on an amused looking Ronon and berating him the whole time. The big Satedan sat patiently while she finished her neat needlework and put a bandage on his arm.

Laura's jaw dropped as he grabbed the petite doctor around the waist and pulled her into his lap. She squeaked in surprise before settling down and leaning her head against his chest with a smile. Spotting her in the doorway, she simply smiled and beckoned her in.

"Hello, Ronon," Laura greeted the Satedan, who nodded to her. "Great to see you, too, Cadman. I've been keeping really well." She rolled her eyes at Jennifer. "He hasn't changed, has he?"

"No," Jennifer replied with a smile for Ronon, who shrugged. "He certainly hasn't."

"Colonel Sheppard told me to come and see you and get cleared for off world duty," Laura explained to Jennifer. "But if you're busy then I'll come back later." Her lips curved in a smile.

"No, no, sit down." Jennifer hopped off Ronon's lap with an embarrassed grin. "It's ok. Ronon, go on. And try not to hurt yourself this time. I just don't have time to spend patching you up all evening."

"Ok," Ronon said meekly, although his dark eyes were dancing with amusement as he looked at Jennifer. Leaning down so he could kiss her, he sauntered off in the direction of the mess hall.

Laura eyed Jennifer suspiciously. "What exactly is the…arrangement between you two?"

"He loves me," Jennifer said simply as she pulled out her stethoscope out of her pocket and began to take Laura's vitals. "And for now, that's enough. He lost so much on Sateda, Laura. I don't think he'll ever really get over it."

"Loss like that is hard to bear," Laura said softly, a faraway look in her eyes. "It can sometimes feel like you'll never stop hurting. But one day it doesn't anymore."

"Have you come to that day?"

Laura smiled. "Not quite yet. But I will. Someday."

Jennifer finished her examination and accompanied Laura to the Daycare Wing, where Cara was happily playing with a small dark haired boy. Laura took one look at his eyes and knew he was Teyla's son. The boy had the very same amber coloured eyes as his mother.

"Hello, Torrin," Jennifer greeted him. "Are you taking good care of Cara?"

"Yes," Torrin told her proudly. "She's got nobody to be her champion, so I'm going to be it."

"He's going to protect me at all costs," Cara informed her mother seriously. "I'll never be taken while he's around."

"Really?" Laura fought to keep a straight face. "Well, that's great. Torrin, thank you for looking out for Cara. It's time for some dinner, young lady."

"I'll show you the mess hall," Torrin volunteered. "I know which way to go."

"Go ahead, "a young woman with dark hair and a bright red jumpsuit told them. Colonel Sheppard was here a while ago. We're done for the day now."

"I'm Laura Cadman, Cara's mother," Laura said, holding out a hand. "You must be Sarah. Colonel Sheppard and Teyla told me about you. You're the teacher."

Sarah Larson was young and enthusiastic and after chatting to her for another few minutes, Laura was completely confident in her ability to teach Cara. She and Jennifer followed Cara and Torrin to the transporter, smiling as Torrin pointed out the mess hall button to Cara.

"Hero worship," Jennifer muttered to her. Laura nodded and smiled. In the mess hall, Torrin spotted Rodney McKay, who waved at her before pulling out chairs for the children.

"Has McKay softened?" Laura asked Jennifer, who snorted with laughter. "He hates kids."

"Not anymore," Jennifer told her. "He's really great since he delivered Torrin. He was preening for months after it."

"We heard that back at the SGC," Laura remarked as she grabbed a sandwich and a bottle of water. "Colonel Carter laughed for weeks when she heard!"

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"This seat taken?" Laura looked up at the smiling face of Evan Lorne. He was holding a tray of food and had one eyebrow raised.

"No," she replied, shaking her head. "Jen had to go back to the infirmary. Some guy got knocked out during training. I think he decided to try his hand at beating Ronon."

Lorne winced. "I did that, "he admitted sheepishly. "Once. When I was young and foolish. Carson-"He could have bitten off his tongue at the stricken look that crossed Laura's face. "Sorry. Laura, I'm sorry." He scrubbed a hand through his short brown hair. "Sorry."

"It's ok," she assured him, though her eyes were still wide. "It's ok. Nobody has mentioned him since we got here."

"It's only been a few hours," Lorne reminded her. "And people don't want to upset you. Your ass kicking skills are legendary here."

"Thank you," Laura said wryly. "But I'm not like that anymore. I train to keep myself in shape for the physicals and to keep up to date so I can go off world when I have to. Other than that, I don't get into 'ass kicking' situations anymore."

"Really?" Lorne's brown eyes widened. "Ever?"

"Mama, can we go now?" Cara appeared at her side, saving her from having to answer him. "I'm sleepy."

"Hello," Lorne said, smiling at Cara, who smiled back at him. "How do you like Atlantis?"

"I got my own champion," Cara informed him loftily. "He's going to protect me at all costs."

Evan kept a straight face as Cara told him the rules of being somebody's champion. He nodded in all the right places and didn't object when Cara climbed up on his knee and leaned her head on his shoulder. "Are you a champion? Torrin told me that Colonel John is his new father and that he's his Mama's champion. And that Ronon isn't as mean as he looks and that Docker Jennifer is Ronon's charge. Maybe they'll get married too. Have you a charge, Major Lorne?"

"No," Lorne told her with a wink. "I was hoping to be your champion. I'll have to fight Torrin for you."

"You can take care of Mama," Cara told him. "Sometimes she cries at night. I think she should have you for a champion."

Laura turned bright red. "Cara, let's go. It's time for your walk. And, young lady, you shouldn't be listening to everything Torrin says."

"But Mama, you need someone to look after you," Cara protested, ignoring Laura's glare. "And Major Lorne has no person to take care of."

"Let's go," Laura said, taking her daughter by the hand firmly. "Sorry, Major."

"Bye, Major Lorne," Cara called, smiling at him.

"It's Evan," he corrected. "To both of you," he added with a smile at Laura. "When we're off duty. Ok?"

Laura found herself nodding, wondering how on earth that had happened.

**Please let me know how I'm doing. It's my first Atlantis fic! **


	3. A Whole New World

Wow

**Wow. I have been so delighted to hear from all of you and so honoured to be added to "The Lorne Identity****" a gem of wealth about Lorne, may I add! He doesn't get half enough attention in my humble opinion. **

**Asugar: You were great. I'd have given up without your advice. ****I did need revisions though didn't I? Cara is definitely Carson's daughter. She's fun to write I model her on my little cousin who is exactly like her. I never thought of Caldwell as being the father type. Hmm. I'll have to explore that one. Jack will definitely feature in later chaps, he and Sam are a great couple. I don't like Woolsey. Never did. He's annoying! The champion thing was something I read somewhere I think it's an old Scottish custom actually, I'm not sure. It seems to fit here though! McKay and kids would be hilarious. Lorne is just hot. H.O.T. Thanks for the praise, I may beg some more help from you at some stage! **

**Sachita: Your English is just fine. Have you written anything yourself in English? Yes, Lorne does like Laura. You'll see soon! I'll experiment with the doc's manager for the solid lines I promise! **

**AndromedaMarine: Thank you, and thanks for the new review. I'm always afraid to see how people will be about different stories. Some people don't think that the order of things should change. **

**Kryan810: I'm glad you like it. I hope you continue to read! **

**Brodieresa: Thanks for the ****suggestions; I'm developing some material for Laura where she has to reinstate herself back into the Atlantis way of living rather that back home. Things are different for her now with Cara (who is so fun to write, btw). Any and all suggestions you have re plot and characters are welcome! **

**Sakurablue13: Cara is a little pet, and Laura is a little serious right now, not the fun loving Cadman she used to be but she'll have help to get back to herself. **

**Tripwatcher2: I loved Cadman. Duet was one of my favourite eps, she was brilliant in it! And I think that with the arrival of Torrin in S5 of Atlantis (which I won't see for months, spoilers anyone?? Please??) they should relax regs a little to accommodate the growing population! **

**John's PuddleJumper: What a great pen name! Love it! Glad I've caught your attention. Please let me know if I'm doing ok. Or screwing up! All reviews welcome!**

**Whirlwind241: Thanks. Please keep reading!**

**Bailey1ak: Thanks, glad you liked it. Kids are terribly for putting their parents on the spot. She's fun to write!**

**Any suggestions for plot or characters please PM me I'd love to hear them. And spoilers for S5 from those of you living Stateside would be welcome Irish TV is not sci fi friendly. **

**Chapter 3. A Whole New World. **

Laura stood on the balcony, looking out over the ocean and absently playing with the ring on her finger as she was wont to do when there was something on her mind. Behind her, in the main Gate Room, the sounds of a party could be heard.

It was Atlantis policy to host a welcome party for the new arrivals after the first week or so of their stay. It gave them a chance to settle in and get their quarters in shape and also to seek out new friends or, like Laura, catch up with old ones.

She sighed once and turned back to the light and warmth radiating from the big room. Standing at the edge of it, she looked around and smiled at the sight before her. The party was in full swing, with music blaring out from a stereo system belonging to a German linguist called Klaus.  
The mix of nationalities amazed her. It had been wide and varied when she'd been here before, but now it was just amazing. What also amazed her was the amount of couples standing around with young babies and toddlers. The population of children on Atlantis under the age of four was growing rapidly.

John was standing next to Teyla, one arm around her, the other gesturing wildly to Radek Zelenka, who was laughing at something the Colonel was telling him. Not far from them, Ronon was chatting amiably to some of the other off duty Marines. Jennifer Keller flitted from group to group, talking animatedly and sipping from a glass of what Laura thought might be wine. The petite doctor had come a long way from the quivering mass of insecurity she'd been when she'd taken Carson's job.

Torrin and Cara chased each other around another corner. As the oldest children living in the city, they were a huge hit with both the civilian and military contingents on the Atlantis base. Laura observed Cara holding her arms up to a burly blond haired Marine and being tossed in the air repeatedly. Torrin howled with laughter, his amber eyes dancing as he demanded his turn.

"Different, isn't it," Lorne said softly from behind her. He held up a hand as she whirled around to meet his gaze, surprise flaring briefly in her eyes. "Easy," he said gently. "Sorry. Didn't mean to startle you."

"It is different," she agreed with a smile. Her eyes were sad. "Completely different. In a good way."

"You're sad," he commented, looking at her face. "You still miss him."

"I'll always miss him, Major," Laura responded, her eyes straying to her daughter.

"Evan," Lorne interrupted quickly. "I told you, off duty it's just Evan."

"Then I'll return the favour, sir," Laura said, some of her old sparkle coming back. "Off duty, it's Laura. Not Cadman, just Laura."

"Think you could stop calling me sir off duty too?"

"Yes sir," Laura teased. "As you wish, sir."

"Shouldn't that be 'As you wish, Master'?" Lorne looked over at her as she watched the party, delighted when she rolled her eyes. "There you go, that got you to smile."

"Evan." Laura's voice was serious. "I never got to thank you."

"For what?" Lorne was surprised. "You've only been back two weeks. What have I done in that time?"

"For that time," Laura said softly. Her hazel eyes rose to meet his brown ones. "For holding my hand when I couldn't even speak. For sitting next to me on the plane and not expecting me to talk to you. I've said all this to Rodney and Colonel Sheppard," she added hastily. "I just wanted to say it to you, too."

Lorne shrugged slightly. "You needed a friend."

"I lost touch with so many of them," Laura sighed. "I couldn't come back here. Couldn't walk through these halls and hear Rodney complain and expect to see Carson appear out of a corner and talk to me."

"Laura," Lorne took her hands in his, surprising them both. "You don't have to explain."

"I don't know why I told you this," Laura said ruefully. "You're my superior officer. It's even against regs for me to be calling you by your first name!"

"Regs here are different to the ones back home," Lorne said airily. "We don't have time for all that silly saluting stuff."

She laughed. "Colonel Mitchell said that it was like being at one big slumber party sometimes." Her smile faded when she realised he was still holding her hands. "Um, Sir? I mean, Evan?"

"Yes?"

"You have my hands," she pointed out. "I need them to go and rescue Dunford from Cara."

He went red. "Sorry. Dismissed, Lieutenant."

She grinned and clicked her heels together, saluting sharply. "Sir! Yes sir!"

Lorne watched her walk up to Ensign Dunford and watched as the young man stood up as she approached. She put a hand on his arm and he relaxed with a smile and released her giggling daughter into her arms.

"Cara, don't annoy Lieutenant Dunford," she admonished gently, setting her down and giving her a light tap on her butt. "He's off duty."

"He said I was a princess," Cara said, sticking out her chin in a gesture her mother recognised 'don't mess with me, Mama'.

"And you are," Laura soothed, "but you have to remember what I told you. Ok?"

Cara nodded, her big eyes serious. "I'll be good, Mama." She tipped her little face up as Laura kissed her forehead and set off to find Torrin.

"She's a pistol, Ma'am," Dunford told her with a grin. "She reminds me of my niece. A little terror."

"She's like me," Laura said with a wry smile. "Independent and sometimes just plain bold."

"Permission to speak freely, Ma'am?"

"Granted, Corporal."

"I've heard stories about you and the missions you were on while you were here five years ago. If your little girl is like you, she's going to be a hell of a Marine someday."

Laura shuddered. "Over my dead body! She'll be a teacher. Or maybe a seamstress. Something nice and safe."

Dunford pointed over to where Cara and Torrin were using Rodney as a climbing frame and laughed. "I'd say that you'll have your work cut out for you, Ma'am."

"I think you may be right."

Laura laughed when Rodney caught a shrieking child under each arm and strode towards the balcony doors, threatening to drop them over the railing.

"Who knew McKay would turn out to be Mr Mom?" John commented as he joined her at the table where she was debating on whether or not to take a glass of the wine Jennifer was drinking. "You going to try some of that?"

"Undecided, sir," she confessed with a smile. "Rodney McKay, the child magnet! Who knew is right!"

"He's great with them," John told her. "Teyla asked him to be Torrin's godfather after he delivered him. It was some night!"

"We heard." Laura gave in and took a glass of the ruby coloured liquid. Taking a sip, she began to cough and splutter as it burned a hole down into her stomach. "God!" Her eyes watered as John thumped her back sympathetically. "What is that stuff?"  
"That is the wine that my people brew specially for occasions such as these," Teyla told her, seeing her face turn red. "John, stop beating her like that. She'll have bruises!"

"She's a Marine," John countered, but did as he was told. "She's a jarhead!"

"Don't get me started on you flyboys," Laura warned, trying valiantly to catch her breath. "I remember when you and Major Lorne got stuck on that planet with the exploding eggplant things and Teyla and I had to rescue you."

"You had Ronon," John protested, gesturing to the big Satedan who was heading in their direction. "He's better than any Marine!"

"We still did the job," Laura argued. "You were covered in that pink goo when I dragged your sorry asses out of there." She blushed. "Sir."

"Proper respect for the chain of command, Cadman," John intoned. He began to laugh when Laura straightened up immediately. "Relax, Cadman, would you! As long as you follow orders when we're off world and on duty then off duty we'll relax the rules a little. Ok?"

"I told her that," Lorne added as he strolled up to them. "Did you try the wine?"  
Laura glared at him. "Yes. And thank you for the warning, Major. How much was in the betting pool that I'd get drunk and have to be carried to bed?"

Lorne had the grace to blush. "I didn't add to it, if that's what you're asking."

"Huh." Laura was enjoying the look of discomfort on the Major's face. "I bet."

"I wouldn't," Lorne was saying earnestly as she turned to walk away and ended up walking smack into Ronon.

"Easy," was all the big man said as he reached out to steady her. "You'll hurt yourself."

"I keep doing that," Laura announced, rubbing her nose. "Your chest is harder than Major Lorne's, Ronon."

"Hey!" Lorne's protest was cut off by the chorus of laughter that rang out at Laura's words.

""Mama!" Torrin came running up to Teyla, throwing himself against his mother, who stepped back in alarm.

John shot out a hand to grab the boy before he barrelled into Teyla's stomach. Before he could chastise him, however, a small voice was heard, wailing loudly.

"Mama! Mama where are you!"

Laura's face paled and she looked frantically around for her daughter. "Cara?"

"That's what I was trying to tell you, Mama." Torrin was tripping over his words in his attempt to explain. "Cara was talking to Piro and Calen and they were talking about their fathers. Then I was telling him about my two fathers and how I'd share one with Cara 'cause she's got no father."

Lorne watched Laura's face blanch and silently cursed the honesty of children. "Laura," he began softly. She cut him off with a wave of her hand and went to her daughter.

"Mama, Cara's crying," Torrin said, his own lower lip trembling. "Papa, can't you be her father too? I promised her I'd share you!"

"Torrin, what did Cara say?" Lorne asked the little boy, watching as Laura led Cara away by the hand. "After you said that you'd share your father?"

"She said thank you." Torrin declared. "But Piro said that you can't just share your father like that. And I said that I could and he said that she had to go and get her own!"

"Piro and Calen did not mean to upset Cara," Teyla told her son, who was worriedly watching as Cara disappeared from view. "Torrin, you did nothing wrong. It was very admirable of you to want to help Cara."

"You did good, kid," John added, scooping the child into his arms. He'd almost burst with pride when Torrin had mentioned sharing his 'father' with Cara. "She's lucky to have a friend like you."

"Evan?" Torrin lifted his head from his father's shoulder, tears sparkling on the dark lashes. "Will you go and check on her? Cara said that you promised to be her Mama's champion"

"I'll go," Jennifer volunteered immediately, frowning when Ronon put out a hand to halt her in her tracks. "What?"

"Let Lorne go," Ronon said, jerking his head towards the other man.

"But why….oh!" Comprehension dawned in Jennifer's eyes and she nodded. "Ev, why don't you go? She could probably use some help with this one."

Lorne nodded and left the room to follow Laura and Cara.

"Houston," John said with a gusty sigh. "We've got a problem."

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Lorne knocked softly on the door of the room Laura was in. He could hear her speaking softly to Cara. "Laura?"

She appeared at the door, clearly dressed for bed in a pair of pink cotton pants and a white tank top. Her hair was hanging around her face and her eyes were red and blotchy.

"Major. I'm sorry I left the party in such a hurry, sir. I didn't mean for you to end your evening." To her horror, tears welled in her eyes again. "I'm sorry. I'll report early in the morning."

"Evan?" The childish voice made them both look around. Cara stood in the middle of the room, her curls tangled around her face. Her big blue eyes were dark with misery. "Did I ruin the party? They won't like me now, will they?"

Lorne's heart melted. "Of course they will, honey. Why wouldn't they?"

"I kicked Piro," Cara confided. Her lower lip wobbled. "I wanted to tell him that I have a Daddy, it's just that I can't see him. But I got mad when he said that I was lying and I had no father. So I kicked him. Really hard."

Praying fervently for inspiration, Lorne went to Cara's side and picked her up. "Ok, listen to me." When she hid her face on his shoulder, he smiled reassuringly at Laura and sat on the couch in one corner of the room. "I knew your father. He was my friend." Absently stroking one hand over the messy curls, he continued. "He was a brave man and he loved your Mama very much."

"I don't know him," Cara sniffled, but she looked up at him. "I never talked to him in all my whole life."

Lorne resisted the urge to smile at her dramatic declaration. "You have a picture, don't you?"

"Mama has. She gave it to me for my own."

"There you go," Lorne told her. "You do know what he looks like. And you can talk to him. He's in heaven. He'll hear you."

"He will?" Cara's eyes were full of wonder. "Really?"

Lorne hesitated and looked over at Laura. She nodded, her eyes full of tears. "He will."

"It's your bedtime, Cara," Laura broke in. "Say goodnight to Major….to Evan." She smiled gratefully at him and reached her hand out for her daughter's. "And say thank you."

"Will you tuck me in?" Cara asked plaintively. "Please, Evan?"

Helpless to resist, he nodded and followed Laura into the child's bedroom. Cara climbed into a bed decorated with pink and blue monkeys and snuggled into her pillow. "Night Mama."

"Good night, baby," Laura replied, bending to kiss her cheek. "Sweet dreams."

"Night Evan," Cara hollered as they backed out of the room.

"Night!" Lorne called back to her. He looked at Laura, who was standing at her window, looking out at the ocean. "Laura?"

When she didn't answer, he went to her side. "Are you ok?"

No answer.

"I can make it an order," he offered in desperation. "Lieutenant Cadman, tell me – "

"What am I doing here?" Laura whispered. "I can't do this. I can't just take her here and expect her to fit in. It's too close to Carson. Too close to everything."

"Is it her or yourself you're worried about?" Lorne let the question hang in the air as he stood at her side.

"Since she was born all I've done is worry about her." Laura's voice was hard and flat. "She's all the family I have. All I've got left of Carson."

"It's been almost five years," Lorne said gently. "Carson wouldn't want you to hold yourself back and not be the person you used to be."

"I don't remember her," Laura answered. The sadness in her voice tugged at his heart. "She's long gone."

"Then find her," Lorne suggested. "I'll see you in the morning. Sarah is taking Cara while you're off world with Colonel Sheppard's team. We leave at oh nine hundred."

"Major Lorne…Evan." Laura put out her hand to his. "Thank you. For helping her."

He shrugged. "Kids love me." A grin spread across his face. "Everyone loves me."

"Goodnight," Laura said, rolling her eyes and laughing as he exited the room. She hesitated a moment before waving her hand at the light sensor and going to bed.

Outside, Lorne leaned against the wall with a sigh. He was a sucker, he told himself in disgust. Always out to rescue the damsel in distress. Only this particular damsel in distress was a grieving woman complete with a four year old charmer and a pair of big, sad blue eyes. Oh yes, he was in major league trouble.

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"Morning Lieutenant," John greeted Laura as she entered the armoury. She was slightly out of breath as a result of having to drop Cara into the capable hands of Sarah Larson and race across the city to get to the weapons store. He tapped his earpiece. "Lorne, you ready?"

"Right here, sir," Lorne answered, striding into the room and halting in front of Rodney McKay, who was grumbling about being dragged away from his breakfast.

"Papa!" Torrin came tearing in after him. "Don't go! I didn't say goodbye!"

"I'm not gone yet," John assured him, plonking him on the bench beside him. "I wouldn't leave without saying goodbye to you, remember?"

"Papa kisses Mama goodbye when he leaves," Torrin confided to Laura in a whisper.

"Really?" Laura pretended to be shocked. "Wow!"

"Disgusting, isn't it?" Lorne added with a wink at the little boy. He grinned as John rolled his eyes. "Sorry, sir."

"This place is like an alternate universe," Laura said in amazement. "I just can't get my head around it!"

"Well it all started with the moving of the science lab over to the South Tower," Rodney cut in. "We decided that the North Tower would be better for the family areas. You know, away from the weapons and the explosives and the like."

"Yes Rodney," John said, rolling his eyes dramatically. "I'm sure Cadman has heard all this before."

"I have," Laura said with a grin. "He told me all of the structural and regulatory changes before I'd even taken my seat at my desk."

"Yes," Rodney sniffed, clearly not happy to be interrupted. "Well. Your desk, as you call it, is actually our desk." He smiled happily. "Seeing as we'll be taking joint leads on this one."

Laura turned to John. "Sir?"

"He's right, Lieutenant," Sam Carter announced as she entered the armoury. "As you were," she told the three young Marines who had snapped to attention the moment she appeared. "You're going to be using the materials found to try and create new defensive weapons."

"Which means you get to play with explosives and I get to mop up your mess," Rodney translated in disgust. "I love my job."

Laura fixed him with a glare. "Rodney, I distinctly remember you blowing a hole in a solar system not so many years ago."

Rodney opened his mouth to speak and shut it again. Lorne grinned at John and nodded to Laura. John shouldered his P-90 and looked at the rest of the team. "Let's go."

Laura took her own weapon, noticing how it felt almost alien in her hands. It had been so long since she'd gone off world that she was no longer sure of how to act and react in certain situations. She took a deep breath and set out to follow Ronon's tall figure.

Lorne stopped her at the door. "This is going to be a little strange for you, Lieutenant. Just don't be afraid to holler if you need help."

"Yes sir."

"How is Cara today?" He kept his voice casual as they headed up the stairs towards the Gate.

"She's fine. She said to tell you hello. And thank you."

"Right!" John boomed as he scooped Torrin into his arms. "This should be a short one, people. Get in, get the samples, and get out. Routine." His eyes came to Ronon and he smirked. "Simple."

"Unlikely," Rodney sang under his breath. He shut up hurriedly when Ronon looked at him. "Sorry."

"As I was saying," John continued without missing a beat. "We should be back by dinnertime."

"You had to go and say it," Rodney cut in, disgust written all over his face. "You just had to say it. Now we'll be attacked. Or ridden with disease. Oh god, we're definitely going to be infected! Maybe we should take Keller with us just in case I get sick. I'm extremely prone to-"

"McKay!" Ronon growled warningly.

"Ok, ok," the scientist said in alarm, darting behind Laura and pulling a face at Ronon.

"McKay!" Laura exclaimed, giggling helplessly at Rodney's antics. "Stop that! Are we good to go?" She addressed Lorne, who shook his head with a smile.

"Not just yet, Lieutenant," he answered. "There's a new ritual for teams going off world now."

Laura was puzzled until she felt something grab her around her legs and looked down to see Cara standing there.

"Mama!" Her voice was high with excitement. "Sarah says that we get to come to the gate to see you off. And to wish you luck!" She hugged tighter. "See you, Mama! And good luck!"

Laura looked at Lorne, who grinned. "Told you!"

"Bye, baby," she replied as she leaned down to kiss Cara's forehead and hug her tightly. "I'll see you later. Be good for Sarah, ok?"

Cara nodded and then ran at Lorne, who grunted as she threw herself against him. "Bye, Evan. Good luck!"

"Thanks," he told her with one of his trademark grins. "I'll bring you home a surprise!"

Laura looked over to where John tossed Torrin in the air before setting him down beside Teyla. He touched his forehead to hers, a smile on his face. "Bye," he whispered to her.

"Good luck," she said, an answering smile on her face. "Come back soon."

"Bet," John replied, kissing her soundly.

"Touching, isn't it?" Rodney said from behind Laura as Cara and Torrin joined Sarah Larson along with Captain Moran's wife and their two year old daughter. "It started one day when Torrin was convinced Sheppard would be eaten if he didn't say goodbye to him."

"It's great," Laura told him, a huge smile almost splitting her face in half. "It's really great."

"Ok, troops," John quipped. "Let's get gone. Back for dinner and all that."

Laura took a deep breath as the event horizon stabilized and followed the rest of the team through the Gate.

**There you go, chapter 3. Please review! I love reviews!**


	4. Dinner Plans, Anyone?

**Hello all, how are you doing? I hope everyone had a nice weekend and that you're all rested etc after it. I searched the net for the second episode of S5 and found it! Poor Keller she's really coming into her own now isn't she! All spoilers will be gratefully appreciated I have to wait for the weekends to use YouTube at home! A massive thank you to Asugar for your encouragement and for the great review it really helped! **

**Also, can anyone tell me in exact instructions how to get straight lines for scene markers cos I put them in and FF takes them out! Thanks!**

**John's Puddle Jumper: I have a long lasting love affair with Sheppard and Mitchell and I'm adding Lorne to that list. I've been devising some stories for Shep and Teyla, and will post them as they are finished. Sorry about my faux pas with the ranks, I tend to mix them up sometimes! **

**Asugar: Wow! That's some review but I have to say it was wonderful to get a detailed analysis so I know what's working and what isn't! Thanks also for the nit picking, I love when people do that so I can be technically correct for the next time!**

**Bailey1ak: I hadn't intended it to be so long, but it just happened that way! I ended up being inspired and babbling a little. More of the relaxed regs to come and also more with the team. Up the team! **

**Sachita: Lorne and Laura is becoming a popular ship. I like it too and yes something will come up there. They're great together. Can you PM me with instructions on the Doc Manager? I just can't figure it out and it would really help!**

**Tripwatcher2: Rodney is only hilarious! He's the humour in every episode even when he doesn't mean to be. I was watching Runner last night and I swear I was in stitches over him! **

**Whirlwind421: I thought about being nice to them and letting them back, but no. I don't think so. It wouldn't make for interesting reading would it? **

**Chapter 3. Dinner Plans, Anyone?**

"Cadman, take point with Lorne. Moran, Ronon, take our six." John settled his sunglasses on his nose and strode to the middle of the group. A smirk played around his mouth as he looked at Rodney, who was busy slapping on suncream. "Rodney, you ready to go?"

"Just one moment," the scientist snapped. "I have an – "

"Extremely fair complexion, yes Rodney, we know." John winked at Laura, who grinned. "Now can we get going? I told my wife I'd be home for dinner."

"She'll kick your ass if you're not," Ronon told him dodging the swipe John sent in his direction. "You know I'm right."

"My wife is a forgiving woman," John declared, making Rodney roll his eyes in disgust.

"Stop saying wife all the time. You've been married for years now!"

"I've been married for all of a year and a half," John argued. "And some people at home – and here too – thought I'd never marry again."

"Well gee whiz," Rodney muttered. "I wonder why!" He yelped as John dug an elbow into his ribs. "Ok, ok! Your wife is a forgiving person. She's a saint if you ask me. God knows how she puts up with you…" His mutters trailed off into annoyed glances and frowns of displeasure as Sheppard strolled along contentedly with a grin.

"McKay hasn't changed," Laura said to Lorne as they set a course for the village Rodney had announced was dead ahead of them as the crow flew. "He's still the same old McKay."

"Less of the old, thank you!" Rodney huffed, stomping along, life signs detector held out in front of him. "If I'm right, and let's face it, I'm always right, then we should be there in about five minutes." He smirked. "If I'm right," Laughing at his own joke, the scientist hurried to keep pace with John.

"How on earth did you think he'd be different?" Lorne asked Laura in a teasing whisper. "He's _McKay_!"

"I don't know," Laura mused. "He's great with the kids. Well, with Cara and Torrin, anyway. I don't know much about the little ones."

"There's only a dozen or so," Lorne teased. "You should know them all by now, Lieutenant."

"Sorry sir," Laura shot back. "I thought that since I had my own very active four year old that I'd be exempt. I'll correct that mistake straight away when I get back!"

"Try coming to the next birthday party," Lorne said with a knowing smile. "I think it's in about two weeks or so. Major Leonard's son will be three."

"Is Major Leonard still here?" Laura asked, noticing smoke rising from a group of small buildings. "Village dead ahead, sir," she called over her shoulder to John, who nodded.

"He went home, got married, had a kid." Lorne recited, hoisting his P-90 in front of him and waiting to get orders from John. "When the SGC announced that they were going to take some families to Pegasus, Leonard requested that he and his family be allowed to come too. His wife is a nurse."

"Wow."

"Told you, Cadman, things are different here now." Lorne went to his CO's side. "How do you want to proceed, sir?"

"Well it's almost lunchtime," Rodney said grumpily. "So can we please proceed towards the nearest house and ask for food?"

"Shut up, McKay," Lorne ordered, tensing. "Sir, you hear that?"

"I do," John confirmed. "I certainly do." He had raised his own weapon, ready to fire if necessary.

"Hear what?" Rodney's head swung around so fast Laura was sure he'd have whiplash. "Demons? Wraith? Replicators? Oh God, we're going to die!"

"Shut up, McKay!" Laura hissed, digging him in the ribs. "They're not hostile, they're just local people."

"Hello," John called out, lowering his weapon and cautiously approaching the small group of women who had come out of the low bushes in front of the little village. "Hello, ladies."

"Oh God, he's trying to be charming," Rodney muttered under his breath. "Ever heard of Hera and the Amazons?"

"Do they look like Amazons to you?" Lorne asked scornfully, gesturing towards the women who were looking curiously at them. "Because I've got to say, they look like nice girls to me."

"Haven't you ever seen the Hercules movies?" Rodney hissed back. "Oh God, we're going to be eaten!"

"Rodney," Laura soothed. "They seem nice. Now. Be charming. I realise that it might be hard for you. But we need to play nice with the other kids right now!"

"Listen to the Mommy," Moran suggested, ignoring the murderous glare Rodney sent in his direction. "Mommies are pretty much always right."

"Thank you, sir," Laura said sweetly. She eyed the women. "And as the only woman in this group, I'd say that our CO could do with a little help!"

* * *

"Hello," Laura called out, knocking gently on the door of the hut they'd been directed to. "Hello? My name is Laura. Could I speak to you for a moment?"

"Doesn't look like anyone's home," Ronon pointed out. "We should probably come back."

"I'm here!" A young woman with a shock of curly black hair and bright blue eyes popped up from behind what Laura thought of as a couch. "Hello. I'm Teva."

"Nice to meet you," Laura smiled. "This is Ronon Dex. We've spoken to Galin and she assured us that you would be our guide for today."

"I would be delighted," Teva told her, scrubbing at a spot of what looked like ink on her blue dress. "Is it just you two, or are there others?"

"We have four more," Laura replied. "They're waiting at Galin's house now. Teva, I wanted to talk to you about your soil. Some of our people visited here before, and they found a mineral in it that the seemed to think was explosive."

"Dr Parrish and Dr Coulson!" Teva exclaimed. "They were very nice. Are they here again? Why do you wear your hair like that? Is she your wife?" Her barrages of questions were directed at Ronon, who looked at Laura quizzically.

"Dr Parrish isn't here, nor Dr Coulson; He wears his hair like that because he thinks it looks good and no, I'm not his wife. His wife is a doctor."

"I don't have a wife," Ronon interrupted with a frown.

"Well you would if you were less of a male and more of a man!" Laura retorted. She plastered a smile on her face and turned back to Teva, who was looking curiously at her. "Sorry. Shall we?"

She followed Teva out of the little hut like dwelling and through the village. "Why do no men live here?"

"They live on another settlement, not far from here," Teva answered. "We only see them at the Moonfall Ceremony."

"Moonfall Ceremony?" Laura stumbled and would have landed on her behind if Ronon's hand hadn't shot out to catch her. "What is that?"

Teva blushed. "Galin will explain."

"Oh good God," Laura whispered. "Maybe Rodney had it right!"

* * *

Evan Lorne was used to female attention. Maybe not as used to it as Ronon and Sheppard, but since those two had become defined as 'off the market', so to speak, the interest in him had elevated.

Sure, he'd dated. He wasn't a monk, after all, and the last six years in Atlantis had seen the Military XO have the requisite relationships with various members of the various groups. Still, he'd somehow managed to always end up with the ones who didn't want to stay in Pegasus. And that was fine with him. He'd come pretty close to falling in love with a pretty dark haired scientist called Angela, but it had fizzled out when she'd tearfully left on the Daedalus. Last he'd heard, she'd gotten engaged to a member of SG9 back home.

So when he found himself the subject of several admiring glances, he didn't blush. Too much. Still, he was grateful when Laura found her way back to the group, Ronon in tow.

That meant they could get on their way. Colonel Sheppard was still chatting amiably to Galin, who was batting her eyelids at him without any success. If ever a man was devoted to his wife, John Sheppard was. Lorne often thought that Teyla was the best thing that had ever happened to his CO.

"You're not going to believe this," Laura muttered to him. "You're really not."

"You've got bad news too?" Lorne faced her, noticing her widened eyes. "What did you find out?"

"There's this moonrise thing," Laura began. She stopped and narrowed her eyes at him. "Wait. Rewind. Bad news? What bad news?"

"We're not going to make it back for dinner, for one thing," Rodney interjected crossly. "The mineral we want to extract is at least a day's hike from here."

"You're not serious!" Laura was horrified. "I can't stay here overnight! What about Cara?"

"She'll be taken care of," Rodney said dismissively. "Teyla and Keller will take her. Keller will be thrilled. You know how broody she gets when she's – _Ow_!" He glared at Ronon, who shrugged. "Did you have to _hit_ me? I was only saying that your girl likes babies. You two should think of marrying and having a few of your own!"

"I need to talk to Atlantis," Laura fretted, pacing rapidly. "I knew I shouldn't have come here. But oh no, I wanted to be all Marine Hero Girl again, just once! Now my daughter will be worried about me." She ran out of breath and stopped pacing. "Colonel? I need to talk to Atlantis."

"Understood," John said with a nod. "We're scheduled to check in with them in about ten."

Laura nodded worriedly. "Is there any way I can talk to Cara?"

""Sure there is," John answered with a reassuring smile. "We talk to the kids all the time. Torrin loves to use the radio."

"Teyla will take good care of Cara, don't worry," Ronon spoke up. He was watching them closely. "So will Jennifer."

"I know," Laura replied. "And I trust them. Who wouldn't! It's just that I've never been away from her. Not really."

"She's going to be fine, Cadman," John interrupted. "Now, let's get in contact with Atlantis." He turned to Lorne, a pleading look in his eyes. "Major, care to tell my wife that I won't be home?"

"Not really, sir," Lorne replied with a grin. "She's fully capable of kicking my ass."

"Not at eight months pregnant, she's not," John remarked. He winced. "But she can make my life miserable if she wants to!" He sighed and tapped his earpiece. "Atlantis, come in."

"Hello, Colonel. " Sam Carter's voice came through the line and Laura detected a smile in her voice. "What's up?"

"We've run into a slight delay." John quickly explained the situation to her, wincing as she let out a low laugh. "Can you patch me through to Teyla?" He noticed Laura gesturing wildly at him and nodded at her. "And Lieutenant Cadman and Captain Moran would also like to speak to their respective families."

"Will do!" Sam agreed. "Keep in touch. Carter out!"

"John?" Teyla's voice was heard coming over the frequency. "Are you there?"

Laura watched as Lorne, Ronon and Moran immediately removed their earpieces and waited for their CO to finish. "Wow," she said again.

"You keep saying that," Lorne commented. "We're capable of being sensitive now and again, you know."

"Who knew?" Laura smirked, her mind taken off worrying about her daughter for a moment. She looked up when she heard John call her name. "Sir?"

"You're up. Teyla would like a word."

Laura slipped her earpiece on and tapped it. "Teyla?"

"Hello Laura. John told me you're anxious about Cara?"

"Just a little," Laura admitted. "Colonel Sheppard told me you'd take her for the night, but I wanted to ask you."

"Consider it done," Teyla told her with a smile in her voice that reassured Laura considerably. "She is here with Torrin and I already. They will be fine."

"Could I talk to her?"

"Certainly. Say hello, Cara."

"Mama?" Cara's voice had a slight tremble in it. "Mama? Can you hear me?"

"Hi, baby." Tears flooded Laura's eyes and she turned quickly away from the rest so they wouldn't see them. "Are you ok?"

"Torrin is teaching me how to use banty rods to fight him!" Satisfied that her mother was in one piece, Cara chattered away about her day, her new friends, the baby inside 'Aunt Teyla's' belly and her monkey making friends with Torrin's elephant.

"That's great, sweetie. Mama will be back tomorrow, ok? So Teyla will tuck you in tonight and I'll give you two hugs tomorrow when I get home. Ok?"

"'Kay, Mama. Can I talk to Evan?"

Laura turned to Lorne with a puzzled face. "She wants to talk to you."

"Hey there," Lorne said, tapping his com unit. "You being good for Teyla?"

"Hi, Evan," Cara called. "Are you taking care of Mama?"

"Mama is well able to look after herself." Lorne chuckled as he met Laura's eyes. "She's looking after us all!"

"Ev-an!" Cara whined. "Mama is the only girl there! You need to protect her at all costs!"

Laura rolled her eyes. "Just agree with her," she whispered to the grinning Lorne. " She's obsessed with this protector champion thing. But if you try and protect me I swear I'll kill you!"

"I'll look out for her, Cara," Evan promised, his eyes dancing with amusement. "She'll be fine."

"'Kay," Cara agreed. "Don't forget my present! Bye Evan! Bye Mama! Love you!"

"Love you too," Laura called out to the burst of static. Moments later, the soft voice of Pamela Moran was heard coming across, asking to speak to her husband. Laura dutifully pulled her headset off to allow the Captain a few moments of privacy.

"Well, that's done," John, said with a pained smile as Moran signalled to them that he was finished. "Teyla's going to be really pissed, but she'll forgive me."

"Sir, we're ready. Teva is waiting." Lorne smiled politely at the young woman, who turned bright red and hastily averted her gaze. He shook his head and fell into step beside his CO.

* * *

"So," Rodney said to Laura as she kept pace beside him on their way to the field Teva assured them contained the mineral they were looking for. "How are you settling back into the Pegasus galaxy?"

Laura looked at him, confused. "Rodney, has the trip through the gate short circuited your brain?"

Rodney looked momentarily alarmed before comprehension dawned and he glared at her. "No! I was being polite. We're going to be working together after all and I want us to get along."

"I know how your mind works, McKay," Laura retorted, grinning at his pained expression. "We were very close once, you and I!"

"Please," Rodney implored with a shudder. "Don't remind me!"

"Hey!" Laura smacked him on the arm. "It could have been a hell of a lot worse!"

"No, it really couldn't!"

"Kids, kids," John cut in mildly. "Let's try to get along and not give our guide here a bad impression of us!"

"They were just getting started, sir," Moran said with a grin. "Providing great entertainment, too!"

* * *

Laura looked over at Teva, who was trotting along, casting furtive glances at them all in turn. She looked questioningly at Lorne, who nodded immediately. She fell back to walk beside Teva.

"Teva, what is moonfall about?" Laura asked curiously, watching as Teva's face turned even more red.

"I have never participated in it," Teva replied. She was twisting her hands together nervously. "You may have noticed that our men live on a different settlement, across the river."

"I did," Laura replied, raising one eyebrow at Lorne, who merely smiled in response. "Why is that?"

"It is a tradition among my people," Teva answered quietly. "Every lunar cycle, the men cross the river and those that have been linked take their mates. Those that have not yet been linked are allowed to choose a mate."

"Why haven't you been…linked?" Rodney asked, trying to disguise his smirk. "You're a pretty girl, what's wrong with them?"

"They do not desire me because I am too young," Teva answered stiffly. "I have no distinguishing characteristics that would make me different to the rest of the women."

"Sounds like they're all a little…" Laura searched for an alternative word to barbaric.

"Barbaric?" Rodney suggested, disgusted. "That's no way to get a woman. They should be ashamed of themselves."

"Maybe the women like it," Moran put in, wrinkling his nose.

"Thank you, Captain," John said with a pointed look in the direction of their guide, "but I think that Teva here would disagree with you."

"Amazons in reverse," Rodney muttered. "I told you that this was a bad idea!"

"Actually, it was _your _idea to get some of this mineral stuff and use it for testing in Cadman's lab." John turned his attention to the scientist, who snorted and kept walking.

Laura listened to them bicker and laughed. "I wondered how much had changed," she said to Lorne. "Now I know."

"Have you missed off world travel?" Lorne asked curiously. "You used to be one of the best Marines under Colonel Sheppard's command. Don't you miss it?"

Laura shrugged. "Of course I do. But I can't just go off world now like I used to. I have my daughter to consider."

"The Colonel and Teyla toyed with the idea of her giving up her off world activity," Lorne told her. "But Teyla wanted to keep working. So Sarah Larson was brought out to take on the role of base Nanny."

"I won't leave my daughter an orphan," Laura countered, her voice hardening. "She's already lost a father. I won't have her left without a mother too."

"Trade missions won't leave Cara an orphan," Lorne pointed out reasonably. "And occasionally, sure, you'll have trouble. But you have a reason to get home now. That's a hell of an incentive."

"Sometimes, no matter how careful you are, you get killed." Laura's eyes were far away, looking at something Lorne couldn't see. "Sorry, sir. Didn't mean to get maudlin on you."

"You miss her," Lorne said. "Cara, I mean."

"I'm going to be away from her overnight for the first time since she was born," Laura said, a little more sharply than she intended. She closed her eyes and swore silently. "Sorry, sir. Again."

Lorne offered her a smile. "Lieutenant, in this case, you're excused."

"We'll set up camp here and check in with Atlantis," John told them. "I'll take the first watch, Cadman, you're with me. Lorne, you and McKay take second." He grinned as Lorne rolled his eyes at Rodney. "Ronon, you and Moran take the last.".

Laura grinned at Lorne as he dropped his pack on the ground with a resigned sigh. "You won't fall asleep anyway, Major."

"Shut up, Cadman," Lorne grumbled, but he smiled. "If he gets to me, I'll just shoot him. Or give him lemon drops!"

A chorus of laughter went up as Teva looked at them curiously. It was plain that she didn't understand their customs at all. "Do you wish to refresh yourself?" she asked Laura shyly. "There is a stream near here that you can use."

"I'd like that," Laura smiled gratefully at her. "Lead the way."

"Don't be long," John cautioned. "You don't know what's out there. Now is not the time to go all girly on me!"

"Yes sir," Laura replied, following Teva towards a clearing.

* * *

"Think they'll be long more?" Lorne asked as he pulled out an energy bar from his pocket and offered it to Ronon. The Satedan took it and nodded his thanks. Rodney was already tucking into a sandwich he'd taken from his bag, a look of utter bliss on his face. Moran was already snoring from his spot curled up on the ground beside Ronon.

"I hope not," John said, settling himself against the trunk of a tree. "I hate taking watch by myself." He grinned mischievously. "I get lonely."

"Is that why Teyla keeps you company when we're off world?" Ronon teased, stretching his long legs out and leaning his head back against another tree.

"Yep!" John's smile was lazy and contented. "Sure is."

"Oh for God's sake," Rodney moaned. "Can you guys not be men for one minute? All you think about is your wives. What happened to guy time? We haven't had a poker night – " He was cut off by the sound of a single scream.

All five men leaped to their feet instantly, lunging for their weapons.

"That was Cadman," John called out. "Cadman!" He headed in the direction of the scream one step behind Ronon, who was pulling out his gun as he ran. "Cadman, come in!"

Lorne burst through the clearing scant seconds behind his CO, chest heaving. "Cadman?" He looked around wildly. "Lieutenant?"

"They're gone, sir," Moran reported. The young Marine's hair was sticking up all over his head and his face was flushed from the exertion. "I found this on the ground." He was holding up Laura's tac vest.

"Colonel?" Lorne turned to his CO. "Someone took them."

**I know I know, I'm mean, cliffhangers and all that, but I like them. They keep ye all coming back for more! Let me know how I'm doing and if you have any suggestions please keep them coming!**


	5. More Than Fear

**Hi all, thanks for your lovely reviews, they were very encouraging! And for all your PM's etc. Now I have one question for ye all. In my obsession with Lorne stories, I've come across some that refer to the episode "The Last Man" which I haven't seen yet because I haven't gotten my season 4 box set. Did Cadman die in that episode? Did she even feature in it and was Lorne some sort of general? I'm dying here help me out!! Also, Lorne has this line about shooting and getting drunk and going home. What ep is that from? Is it Runner by any chance? All help is gratefully appreciated!**

**Asugar: I wouldn't call it trouble, but Ronon is a little male and scared of going that final step. More on that in later chapters. I don't want to line all my chicks in a row yet! (Vala is coming out in me!) My cousin Maeve (Cara's doppelganger!) has an obsession with talking to everyone on the phone. Kids that age seem to do that! And Lorne with a child is too cute who could resist!**

**John's Puddle Jumper: I corrected that, just for you! Thanks for the heads up, appreciate it. **

**Bailey1ak: Sorry for making you wait. I'm in angsty form but I don't want to rush things with Lorne and Laura. She's a little unsure of herself. But I don't want to make her a martyr either. It's tough!! I used that line on a friend of mine once his face was hilarious. He's now married btw, so it worked! **

**Trecebo: Are you Scottish? You sound Scottish! Welcome to my baby, it's my current pride and joy. I'm also writing for CSI NY and having a great time of it. Glad you like it. I hope you keep reading and feel free to pm with any suggestions or corrections! **

**Whirlwind 421: Thanks; it's coming along nicely now thank God. Had a few moral hiccups with the next couple of chapters and I'm still learning about the American Military, so ignore any little glitches! **

**Tripwatcher2: Thank you so much, I'm so glad you're enjoying it. **

**Chapter 4. More Than Fear. **

Lorne paced the clearing, almost growling with frustration. "We have to go after them, sir." He stalked past John and Ronon without waiting for an answer.

"Major." One word from his CO and he stopped, turning around to look at him. "Stand still."

"Yes sir."

"Now, take a breath."

"Breathing, sir."

John frowned at him. "Good. Now, let's take a step back and look at the plan. First, we need to contact Atlantis and tell them what's happened."

"Crap!"Lorne exclaimed suddenly. He immediately hurried to correct himself as he saw John's eyebrows shoot up. "Not what you're saying, sir. I was thinking about Cara."

"Crap." John exhaled. "I'll tell Teyla and Keller to keep her occupied. She'll be ok."

"Sir, she's a smart kid. She's going to know something's up." Lorne resumed his pacing. "Let me talk to her."

"Lorne, "John frowned. "A word?"

Rodney watched the two men talk quietly. "What do you think they're talking about?" When Ronon and Moran didn't answer him, he prodded the Satedan with his elbow. "Hello? Speaking here! Do you think that Lorne has figured out that he's got a thing for Cadman yet?"

"Not the time, McKay," Moran put in, frowning. "Really not the time."

"What!" Rodney threw up his hands. "I'm just saying is all."

"She's been through enough," Ronon said quietly. "Don't interfere. I know that sometimes you can't help yourself, but this time, try harder."

Rodney looked as if he was going to argue, but thought better of it as the Satedan's eyes narrowed and he made a move towards him.

"Sheppard." Ronon strode towards John, spinning his gun around. "What are we going to do?"

"The only thing we can do," John said grimly. "We have to go back to the village and find out what the hell is going on here."

* * *

Laura cracked open one eye and groaned at the pain that exploded through her head. Wincing, she tried to roll onto her back and realised that her hands and feet were tied. She wriggled furiously until she was in a sitting position and looked around her. Panic flared briefly through her before her Marine training kicked in.

_Ok, think, Laura_, she ordered herself. _Look around you. Establish where you are, who's holding_ _you and how the hell you can get out of it._

Cara was going to be frantic if she didn't come back.

Oh no. She was so not going there. Panic would get her nowhere. _Think, Laura. Think._

A low groan sounded from near her and she swung her head around to see what was causing it. Teva lay in the far corner, bound in a similar fashion to Laura. Blood trickled from a wound on her temple and her eyes were glazed.

"Teva," Laura whispered, scooting over inch by inch and ignoring the pain shooting through her shoulder. "Teva, it's Laura. Are you ok?"

"Laura?" Teva whispered, trying valiantly to focus on Laura's face. "What happened?"

"I'm guessing we were attacked from behind, " Laura said, scanning the room where they were being held. It was a small room, about eight by twelve. The only window was barred and the door appeared to be made of some metal substance that looked like iron.

"My head," Teva moaned weakly. "Hurts."

"You have a cut," Laura said, bending closer so she could inspect the cut. "It's not deep, you won't need stitches." Ignoring the pain in her upper body, she move closer to Teva so she didn't feel alone.

"Laura," Teva whispered, "I'm scared."

"Colonel Sheppard and Major Lorne will come after us," Laura said, her confident tone hiding her inner fear. "They always do."

"Will they be here before they come back?" Teva whispered. She burrowed against Laura for comfort. "I'm afraid of them."

"Who's them?" Laura asked, confused. "The men who took us?"

"It is too early for Moonfall, " Teva said, beginning to tremble. "It must be the Funli."

"The fun who?" Laura struggled against the ropes that bound her wrists and wished fervently that she could reach the knife in her boot. If she could only get it free…

The door of their little prison flew open with a loud bang. A tall, broad man entered, his face painted with vivid orange and red stripes. His clothing reminded Laura of the Athosian dress, loose and made of animal skins. He stopped in front of them and stared down.

Teva began to whimper. Laura stared back up at him defiantly. "What do you want," she asked, thrusting her chin up. "Why have you brought us here?"

Their captor dragged her to her feet and backhanded her hard across the face. "You do not speak to me!" His voice was booming. Menacing.

Laura fought to see past the stars spinning around her head and looked up at him again. "Let us go, or I swear our people will be here so fast…" She never got to finish her sentence. The giant holding her simply slapped her again, throwing her to the ground. She hit the hard dirt floor, Teva's screams echoing in her head before the world went black again.

* * *

"Just who are these Funli people, " John demanded, slamming his fist on the table and eyeing Galin menacingly. "Who are they, and what do they want with Lt Cadman?"

"The Funli are a band of renegades that live outside our code," Galin began, seeming unfazed by John's outburst. "Colonel Sheppard, why don't you sit? I will explain." Her eyes appeared almost black as she gazed earnestly at him. "Please."

Lorne told himself to be calm and not shake the woman in front of him. She was the matriarch of this clan. It probably wouldn't go down terribly well if he treated her like a spoilt child. But damn, if he didn't get some answers soon he'd lose his mind.

He told himself that he'd do the same for any member of the expedition. Hell, he'd thrown himself into the line of fire more times than he cared to count for Colonel Sheppard, Dr Weir, even McKay. The night Torrin had made his entrance into the world was one of the scariest he'd ever put down. He'd gone after Jennifer and Teyla into the Bola Kai camp without a thought.

But the thought of what these people might do to Laura made his blood run cold.

He wasn't sure when it had become personal. Hell, he wasn't sure just how personal it was yet. The last time he'd seen her in person before she'd returned to Atlantis was that horrible day he'd sat with her in the infirmary of the SGC. He'd never forgotten the way she'd curled into a ball and sobbed as if her entire world was ending.

At the time, all he could do was hold her hand tightly, letting her know she wasn't alone. When he'd come to see her to say goodbye before beaming aboard the Daedalus, she'd just turned anguished hazel eyes to his and looked away again.

The next time he had heard from her, she had been in the control room back home, taking the weekly check in from Atlantis after a suspect device had been found on P7Y-903. When he saw her reach up to adjust the COM unit, the baggy blue uniform hadn't been able to hide her very obvious bump. He'd been shocked, then happy for her. They'd spoken infrequently after that, as her maternity leave and ensuing problems with the Ori and the Replicators had prevented their paths from crossing.

He had been shocked to discover that he'd missed her when almost eleven months went by without speaking to her. She had started taking some of the Atlantis check ins again, when they related to her work in Area 51. Lorne had looked forward to hearing about Cara, how big she was getting, how much she looked like her father and how much Laura loved being a mother. The previously kick ass Marine had been replaced by a softer, more vulnerable woman.

Lorne hoped like hell that the kick ass Marine was still in there somewhere, because the mother had a little girl who needed her.

"Major?" John elbowed him. "Want to tune back into this frequency?" His eyes told Lorne that he had an idea of what he was thinking right now.

"Sorry, sir." Lorne forced his thoughts to stop taking that path and listen. "Please, continue."

"Moonfall," Galin began, her eyes seeming to look right into him, " is an ancient ritual that has taken place among my people for centuries."

"But what is it?" Rodney persisted, earning himself a glare from John and Lorne. "Sorry."

"It is the ritual of choosing a mate," Galin continued, folding her hands together and sitting back in her chair. "Every moon, the males come from across the river and those that have been linked are allowed to…"

"Oh good Lord," Rodney muttered. "They get one night a month for—"

"Rodney," John warned. "Button it!"

"Those that are not linked are offered as potential mates," Galin continued calmly. "It is simple."

"Simple?" John couldn't contain his disgust. "Simple? What the hell is wrong with you people? And you still haven't answered my question. Who are the Funli and what do they want with Cadman?"

"The Funli, as I have said, are a band of renegades that broke apart from our tribe many years ago. They choose not to observe our customs and have set up their own village outside the confines of ours."

"Do they take part in this moonrise thing?" Lorne demanded, his hands clenching into fists.

"No," Galin said gently. "They do not. They take what they want and discard it when they are finished."

"Are they all male?" Ronon asked. He had stayed quiet throughout Galin's revelation, choosing to hang back from the group and observe. Moran had taken position at the door, watching intently for any sign that things were heading south.

"We do not know," Galin answered. "They have only ever taken females from the village in my memory."

"Can we talk to someone they've taken?" Lorne asked, getting to his feet in his haste. "They might be able to point us in the right direction!"

Galin lowered her eyes. "Nobody has ever survived the Funli village. All those they returned to us were ill."

"What do you mean, ill?" John asked suspiciously. "As in fever? Flu? Measles?"

Galin looked puzzled. "I do not know of what you speak, but I mean ill in their minds. Most perished not long after their return."

Lorne got to his feet. "Sir, we're not leaving Laura…I mean Lieutenant Cadman…there to die."

"Agreed." John got to his feet. "Galin, we appreciate your hospitality and your help, but I have to tell you that we're not happy to leave without out friend."

"I can empathise," Galin replied. "But there is nothing I can do to help you. I cannot put any more of my people in danger."

"Would the men help?" Ronon interrupted. "The ones across the river."

Galin shook her head. "We do not speak to them unless it is Moonfall. It is forbidden."

"Galin!" A young woman entered the room. With a quick bow, she crossed to Galin's side. "There is something you should see."

"What is it?" Galin demanded. "Luna, what is it?"

Luna gestured towards the door. "They left her at the outskirts of the village."

Lorne looked up and felt his stomach roil at the sight of two women carrying an unconscious and bloody form between them. He recognised the dark curly hair. "Sir, that's Teva."

John was already crossing the room to take Teva's still form from the two warriors. "I've got her," he told them, lifting Teva easily in his arms. "She's breathing!"

Lorne immediately hurried to his CO's side to help him. "Sir?"

"Radio Atlantis," John ordered. "Get Keller in here immediately. Don't argue, Ronon," he warned as the Satedan frowned. "She needs help."

"Fine," Ronon conceded, looking at Teva's battered face. " But I'll meet her at the gate." His rigid stance and the glare in his eyes told John that arguing with him would be futile.

"Do you want another team here, sir?" Moran cut in. "Maybe some additional firepower might help."

"Major, ask Colonel Carter to send another team of Marines in with Keller," John ordered. "I have a feeling there may be trouble."

* * *

Laura forced herself not to whimper as the guard came to the door of her cell. Teva's screams echoed in her head still, and the fact that they had now stopped terrified her. An image of her daughter's face flashed into her head, and she forced back the fear that she might leave her alone without a mother.

"The Master wishes to speak with you." The guard, whom she'd started to think of as Gigantor, pulled her from the floor with rough hands. "Get up."

"What does he want with me?" She stumbled over a stone and cried out in pain as he yanked her to her feet, the force sending a pain shooting up through her already injured shoulder.

"You do not question the Master," Gigantor boomed. "You are nothing to him."

Laura opened her mouth to contradict and he lashed out a hand to hit her. "Do not speak!"

She felt the warm trickle and tasted blood in the back of her throat. "I'm sorry."

Gigantor opened a door in a large stone building and shoved her inside. She took a mental note of the way to the Master. Right, then left. Three doors down and a right. He opened another door and Laura found herself standing inside what looked like a medieval throne room.

A long table ran down the centre of the hall, covered in a white cloth. Remnants of a meal lay on it along with tankards of wine. The smell of roasted meat hung in the air, making her stomach turn.

"I see you have brought her to me." The male voice was cold. "Bring her closer."

Laura looked up to see a huge man sitting on what she could only describe as a throne. His eyes gleamed as he looked at her. She forced herself to meet his gaze and not to shudder.

_Keep your cool, Cadman. You're a Marine. This is what you trained for. You're better than this. Don't let him see fear. Think of_ _Cara._ She repeated the words over and over in her head as she stepped forward on shaky legs, praying that he wouldn't see how afraid she was.

"What is your name?"

"Lieutenant Laura Cadman, United States Marine Corps." She looked defiantly at him as she answered. "What's yours?"

"Lieutenant?"

"It's my rank." She refused to look away from his icy grey eyes. "I'm a soldier."

"You are small and weak," he scoffed. "How is it that you are a soldier?"

"In my world, small isn't a bad thing," Laura retorted angrily. "Height doesn't matter. It's what you can do." She almost smiled as she said the words, remembering boot camp and those that had told her that five feet four of sheer determination would definitely make a damn good Marine out of her.

"You are interesting," the Master conceded after staring at her for a moment. "You will dine with me tonight."

Laura's head snapped up. "Dine?" Her voice was a squeak. "_Dine?_ With you?"

His voice went low and chillingly soft. "Unless you would prefer to dine with Kellec." He indicated the grinning guard. "He would certainly… enjoy your company."

"No." Laura stepped back hastily. "I'll dine with you."

The Master laughed. "As you wish. Kellec will escort you to where you can prepare." He gave a sharp wave of his hand and swept out.

"This way," Kellec ordered as he grabbed her hair, making her whimper. "Quit your noise!"

Laura followed without a word, keeping careful mental note of where they were positioned inside the building.

Kellec opened a door and yanked her inside, turning to her with an evil grin. "I usually check the merchandise before I let my Master sample it, " he told her, reaching out for her. "You will be a real treat for me."

In that instant Laura knew that she'd rather die than let him touch her. She backed up until she was against the wall and closed her eyes as he reached around to untie the rope around her wrists. The moment he did so, she slapped her hands on his massive chest.

He smiled, thinking that she was accepting his advances, and moved back slightly. Quick as a flash, she unearthed the knife in her boot and plunged it into his throat, blood spurting out and all over her. Kellec fell to the floor, clutching his throat and gurgling.

Laura retrieved the knife and stepped over the dead man, ignoring the blood on her uniform and her skin. There would be time to clean that later.

* * *

Lorne followed John and Ronon through the trees, Rodney following behind them. They had opted to let Jennifer treat Teva and go and see the Fulnli camp for themselves lreaving Moran and his team to keep one eye on Jennifer.

Ronon hadn't been terribly happy with the idea of leaving Jennifer in the village without him, but he'd gone on John's request anway.

"It's up there," Rodney pointed to the smoke rising from the trees. "Should be only a few hundred metres from us."

"Any sign of Cadman's transmitter?" John asked, holding up a closed fist to the others. Ears straining, he nodded at Ronon to continue. "Sorry. Thought I heard something."

"No sign of her," Rodney answered, rapidly pressing buttons on the life signs detector. "But she may be in a shielded area. They're not unusual."

"Why the hell did we think it would be a good idea to come here?" Lorne demanded, stopping to look at Rodney. "McKay, if something happens to Cadman, you're telling her daughter."

"That's harsh, Major," Rodney bristled. "I may be a genius, but even I cannot predict what will happen on every planet we visit!"

"Ok, ok," John stepped between Rodney and the menacing glare Lorne was giving him. "Rodney, you couldn't have known that Cadman would get abducted. That said," he continued when Rodney looked smug, "you shouldn't rub it in, either."

"Sir, someone's in those bushes," Lorne said in a low voice. He pointed to a cluster of scrub ahead of them that was rustling.

"Cover!" John hissed the order, taking refuge with Ronon behind the nearest tree. Rodney and Ronon ducked into some sparse vegetation opposite them.

The sound of shouts could be heard coming towards them, followed swiftly by footsteps and what sounded like gunfire. Lorne looked at his CO, waiting for orders.

"Stay put," John whispered into his com unit as the noise grew closer. "Stay where you are. If they're hunting, we can go in and have a look around for Cadman."

"Yes sir."

They flattened themselves against the trees and watched as the scrub parted and the small figure of Laura Cadman was seen crashing through the trees. Lorne leapt to his feet, but Ronon was faster. He was out from behind the trees before Lorne was on his feet, reaching out for Laura, who stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him.

He wasn't fast enough. One of the men chasing her reached her first and grabbed her around the waist, hauling her against him. Sheppard and Rodney immediately stepped out, weapons pointed at the man. Laura squirmed against his grasp, but only succeeded in making him squeeze her so tightly she had to fight to draw breath.

"Let her go," John ordered them, his green eyes icy cold. "You don't want to hurt her."

"Sir," Laura rasped out, crying out at the pain in her shoulder. "Sir, take…shot…"

Lorne realised with a growing sense of dread that John didn't have a clear shot. Nor did Ronon or Rodney due to the other eight weapons trained on them. Ronon's finger twitched on his gun. One look from John made him step back a little.

"I'll kill her where she stands," the guard threatened, holding a knife to her throat. "She's of no importance to me."

"Then let her go," John said coldly. "You have no need for her, just let her go."

"Our Master has…uses for her," he replied, his eyes glittering. "He promised us we could use her too if we found her." A smile spread across his face. "As a reward."

Lorne's stomach rolled at the terror in Laura's eyes. Damn it, her first mission off world in almost five years and she nearly got killed. Her eyes were darting around, looking for something to use against the man holding her.

"Listen, Todd," John began, his p-90 still pointed at the guard. "Mind if I call you Todd?"

"I am Bron," the man told him. "Second to the leadership."

"Well, Bron, second to the leadership," John said sarcastically. "I'm telling you, it's in your best interests to let Lieutenant Cadman go."

Lorne knew the instant she spotted him. Her eyes widened slightly, and she gave an imperceptible nod. He raised his weapon, pointed it at Bron's head, and waited.

Laura looked at Lorne's poker face. She closed her eyes briefly, and allowed her knees to buckle. As she sagged, three shots rang out. She crumpled to the ground as Bron's hold on her loosened. The last thing she saw was Ronon reaching out for her as she fell, and the sound of voices echoed in her head.

Then there was nothing.

**Mwah hah hah! I'm like Montgomery Byrnes here rubbing my hands together in unholy glee! I really hope ye liked it. I suck at the action/mission/.whump scenes so if anyone wants to write them for me I'd be delighted! **

**I'm plugging Nika Dixon's stories at the moment along with the wonderful tales from Andromeda Marine. **

**Thanks to Asugar for being an amazing help and to all of you for your ideas and support. **


	6. This time it's different

**Hey guys, thanks so much to all of you for reading and reviewing. I don't mind telling you that I was very concerned about the last chapter, I don't usually write the action/mission thing and it was a scary thing for me to do! **

**Steel Cheetah: Wow, what a great pen name! I swear mine is so unoriginal it's painful! Thanks for stopping in, I hope you continue to read and to enjoy it. There are some great stories about Lorne on ff, some really great ones! This is just for my own fun and because I love Kavan! **

**Bailey1ak: Thanks for the compliments, I feel better now! Lorne has a thing alright, but that whole no frat thing (which totally sucks btw, even as it makes sense!) is going to be problematic. Still, I am the writer, so I can do what I like with my own characters! **

**John's Puddle Jumper: As soon as I write em, you'll have em! I promise! **

**Trecebo: Texas, huh? I have this image of Texas as being full of cowboys and people with strong accents (which I'm sure it isn't!). I'm Irish to the core, I love the Emerald Isle and I love the culture and everything that goes with it. I'm very proud of my Celtic heritage and it's always nice to meet people who are pleased to be Irish! AS to slow and steady, I think that if she were really grieving for her fiancé, she'd take her time and be terribly wary. I know I would. Thanks for the review! **

**Chapter 6. This time it's different. **

It was all over very quickly. When Laura fell to the ground, Ronon lunged towards her, pulling out his gun and taking three men down with him. He wrapped her in his arms, rolling over with her until she was out of the line of fire before pulling his gun out and taking out another armed guard.

John and Rodney opened fire on the remaining hostiles, aided by Lorne, who was still in position behind the trees. Moments later, the bodies of Laura's captors lay scattered around.

"Clear!" John called, slowly advancing out of his position and scanning the area with sharp green eyes. "Ronon, is she ok?"

"She's breathing," Ronon reported after looking closely at her. "She's covered in blood and dirt. I can't make out if it's hers or not."

Lorne fell to his knees beside her. "Laura? It's Major Lorne. Can you hear me? Lieutenant?" He cast worried eyes to John's. "Sir, I can't wake her." He gently brushed a strand of hair back from her face, a motion not unnoticed by his CO, who sighed before signalling to Rodney.

"Move back," Rodney ordered, coming to crouch down beside Laura. He quickly ran his hands over her arms and legs, sighing in relief. "She's ok. Nothing broken. I don't think that blood on her clothes is hers either."

Lorne was standing, looking down at her in shock. Something akin to rage darkened his eyes to almost navy. "She's covered in bruises," he spat out. "She's not ok."

"Dr Keller, come in." John tapped his earpiece.

"Go ahead John."

"We've got Cadman. She's unconscious, but she's breathing and she doesn't appear to have any broken bones or other serious injuries."

"Get her back here," Jennifer requested. "We'll stabilise her here and prep her for transport through the gate."

"Ronon, can you take her?" John shouldered his P-90, looking around him. "I don't want to delay out here any longer than we have to. "

"Well thank God for that," Rodney muttered. "I feel like I've run a marathon."

Lorne looked at him, his lips twitching despite his worry. "McKay, I'd pay to see you run a marathon."

"I happen to be extremely athletic," Rodney shot back. "We can't be all hotshot flyboys like you, can we?"

They were walking slowly, eyes peeled for further visitors, as John put it. Ronon carried Laura in his arms. She still hadn't stirred and Lorne had to look at her now and again to reassure himself she was breathing. Rodney and John brought up the rear, weapons at the ready.

As they neared the village, Laura stirred with a small moan. Ronon stopped, calling John in a low voice. "She's awake."

"Lieutenant?" John put himself directly into her line of vision. "It's ok. We've got you. We're on our way back to Atlantis now."

Laura turned her gaze on him, relief flooding through her eyes before they rolled back in her head and she blacked out again.

* * *

"I need to get her to the infirmary, now," Jennifer told Sam as they walked through the Gate. "She's not waking up. I want to get her under a scanner immediately."

"Go," Sam said quickly, concerned at the look in her CMO's blue eyes. "Ronon, Colonel Sheppard, Major Lorne, care to fill me in?"

John opened his mouth to speak, but Rodney beat him to it. "We were going to take samples of the explosive soil and when Cadman and Teva went to clean up, they were taken by a group of hostiles called the Funli."

Lorne scrubbed a hand through his hair. "They took her and Teva, did God only knows what to them." His eyes strayed to the corridor to the infirmary where they'd taken Laura. "Colonel Carter, where's Cara?"

"She's in the nursery, Major," Sam said gently. "Sarah and Teyla are taking care of her."

"I'd like to see Teyla myself," John admitted. "Just want to check in."

"Go," Sam told them. "Major, go and get that cut checked out, too."

Lorne looked down to where she was pointing and noticed his arm was bleeding. "It's just a scratch," he said with a shrug. "I have some medical supplies in my quarters. I'll bandage it up."

"I can make it an order," Sam offered with a smile. "I'd like you to check in on Lt Cadman and then report back to me at 1800."

"Yes Ma'am."

"John?" Teyla hurried towards them as fast as her swollen stomach would allow. She reached her husband's side and allowed herself to be pulled into a tight hug. "What happened? Evan, you're bleeding." She reached out to touch Lorne's arm. "Are you alright?"

Lorne offered her a small smile. "It's just a scratch."

"I have heard that before, many times." Teyla looked at her husband, her amber eyes full of something only he could understand. "And I believe that one of those times you almost turned into a bug."

John shuddered. "We promised that we weren't going to mention that. Ever." He sighed dramatically. "I knew I should have had it written into our vows."

Teyla smiled and kissed his cheek. "I will accompany Evan to the infirmary," she told him. "I need to see Doctor Keller myself when she is finished with Laura."

"Why?" John was instantly concerned. "Are you ok? Is the baby ok?" His hands went to her stomach, patting anxiously.

Lorne smiled at the sight of his CO's panicked face. "Sir, I think it's normal to have weekly check ups while you're pregnant." He held out a hand to Teyla. "I'll be your escort, Mrs Sheppard. Let's move out."

"Lorne?"

"Sir?" He turned back to John and waited for his orders.

"See me before debrief." He left it at that, walking towards the armory so he could dispose of his tac vest and remaining weapons.

Lorne exhaled. Crap. "Yes sir."

Teyla smiled sympathetically at him he slowed his strides to match hers. "You are troubled."

Lorne looked at her with a rueful grimace. "I'm in a galaxy millions of light years from home. I've been here almost six years and funnily enough I don't see myself leaving it for another six. I have my own team and I love my life here."

"But you are troubled," Teyla repeated, stopping and placing a hand on her stomach. "I can tell."

Lorne rolled his eyes at her. "Is this one a telepath too?"

She laughed. "I do not know. This one has yet to be tested the way that Torrin was!"

"Thank God for that," Lorne said fervently, remembering Teyla's battle with the Wraith Queen aboard the hive ship when she'd been pregnant with Torrin. "I don't want to be around for another bout of that!"

"Evan." Teyla turned serious. "You have been part of my life for a long time. I consider you a friend."

"Thanks, "Lorne said cautiously, wondering where she was going with this. "Back at you."

"And as your friend," Teyla continued serenely, "I am telling you that it is alright to allow yourself to feel."

"Feel what?"

"Whatever you want to," Teyla replied simply. "You are a good man. Anyone would be lucky to have you in their lives."

"Teyla, I'm not sure where you're going with this," Lorne began, "But if you're trying to set me up with one of the Athosian women again…"

"I am not attempting any such thing," Teyla defended herself. "I think you know what I am talking about." Her amber gaze settled on Lorne's eyes. "Evan, may I speak freely?"

"Go ahead," Lorne said, resigned to the fact that she'd tell him what he was afraid her husband already knew.

"I believe you have feelings for Laura," Teyla said evenly. When he started to interrupt, she held up a hand. "I believe you know this already, and if I know you, you are attempting to keep it hidden."

"It's against military regulations to – "

"I believe military regulations went out of the window, as you say, when Corporal Pierce married Sergeant Evans," Teyla interrupted him, giving him a steely glare that her husband jokingly referred to as her 'don't mess with me' look.

Lorne had no comeback for that, so he crossed his arms and waited for her to finish. Teyla always got her point across. It was usually in your best interests to wait and see what she had to say.

"You need to tread carefully," Teyla warned. "She is wary."

"She's hurting," Lorne corrected her. He slumped against the wall with a sigh. "Teyla, I don't know how I feel about her. I don't know because I haven't thought it through yet." Pressing a hand to his face, he sighed. "I don't want to upset her. She's still torn up over Carson, and there's Cara to think of…"

"Carson is not coming back," Teyla's voice was soft. "He is gone. She cannot bury herself in a memory."

"I know that," Lorne snapped. "Sorry, Teyla. I didn't mean to bark at you."

She grinned. "I am John Sheppard's wife. I am used to his…barking. Think nothing of it."

"I should get to the infirmary," Lorne said, glancing at his watch. "Come on. I'll walk you there."

"I have no need to be there," Teyla informed his glibly. "I just wanted to talk to you where John couldn't hear me." She threw him a grin. "I can be just as sneaky as you men, when I want to be."

Lorne shook his head at her back and made his way to the infirmary, wondering what on earth he was going to tell his CO when he had to face that particular music.

* * *

"Keep that dry," Jennifer Keller ordered, putting a butterfly bandage on Lorne's arm and smiling at him. The petite doctor had become a good friend to him in the time they'd been stationed in the Pegasus galaxy. It had started with him getting injured in a sparring accident with Ronon and developed from there. Jennifer had become a sympathetic ear, a helping hand and a movie night buddy all rolled into one small blonde package.

"Yes ma'am," Lorne teased with a grin. He got up to go and turned back. "Jen? How's Laura doing?"

If Jennifer was surprised at his use of Laura's first name, she didn't show it. "She's still out, but scans showed that she's going to be ok. No concussion, nothing broken. Her shoulder's pretty banged up; she's going to need a sling for a couple of days."

"But she's ok, right?" Lorne asked again, looking around to the curtained cubicle that covered her from view. "They didn't…"

"No, Ev, they didn't." Jennifer took his hand and dragged him towards the little cubicle. "She's in there. If you want to sit with her awhile, I'll be in my office." Her message was clear.

Lorne's lips quirked. "It's obvious, huh?"

"I know you," Jennifer said simply. "Go on. I'll let you know when it's time to go."

Lorne approached the bed cautiously, pulling back the curtain to reveal a sleeping Laura. He bit back the oath that came to his lips when he saw her bruised face and arms. One eye was swollen, and her lip was puffy from where Bron's hand had connected with her fist. She looked very small and very young. And very frail.

"It's just bruises," Jennifer said from behind him, noticing the way his hands clenched into fists. "Evan, she's fine. She'll wake up when she's ready."

Lorne nodded. "I don't think Cara should see her like this," he stated flatly. "She's only four. It would freak her out."

Jennifer nodded her agreement. "I'll tell Sarah to keep her."

Lorne dropped into the chair beside Laura's bed and waited until Jennifer had pulled the curtain around the bed again.

"Hi," he said softly, giving in to the urge to take her hand and stroke it gently with his thumb. "You were beat up pretty good, but you're ok now. Jen says you're going to wake up when you're ready."

He kept up a steady stream of chatter, telling her about other missions he'd been on with similar results, about Cara and how she was staying with Sarah Larson. He never heard the curtain twitch back or saw John poke his head around it.

"Major?"

He jumped to his feet and blushed scarlet at the knowing look on John's face. "Sir?"

"It's 18.30, Lorne. Colonel Carter sent me to find you."

Lorne cursed aloud. "Sorry, sir. Lost track of time."

"I see that," John returned, looking at Laura. "How's she doing?"

"She still hasn't woken, "Lorne told him, watching the rise and fall of her chest. "Doc says she's going to be ok. Pretty sore and shaken, but ok."

"She's a damn good Marine," John mused. "Or she used to be. Mitchell said she passed all her physicals and every other test they threw at her, but she refused to go off world because of Cara."

Lorne looked at him, waiting patiently for him to get to the point. "Sir?"

"Sit down, Evan," John sighed. He watched as Lorne's eyebrows shot up at the use of his first name. "Lorne, we've been working together for years now. And you're a damn good XO."

"Thank you, sir."

"That said, I've noticed a change in you lately." John settled himself into the other chair and eyeballed him. "Off the record, Major. Talk to me."

Lorne looked at him warily. "Off the record? With all due respect, sir – "

"I'm going to tell you something," John interrupted. "I think that by now, after all this time, we've earned the right to be friends as well as colleagues."

"I'm not sure where you're going with this, sir."

John blew out a frustrated breath. "God. Nobody delivers a straight line with a straight face like you do. You must have been a killer at poker." He eyed his XO again. "Lorne, relax, would you? I don't think I'm that intimidating!"

"Not really, sir." Lorne's lips twitched. "Your wife, on the other hand…"

"She's got a great poker face," John mused, a grin tugging the corners of his mouth upward. "I can never win." He shook himself out of his reverie. "Ok, here it is. I'm your CO. I'm also your friend. And in the great wilderness that is the Pegasus galaxy, I think that we need to look at how we live here."

"Sir, Stargate Command already relaxed regs enough to let families out here," Lorne interrupted.

"Yes they did. And they allowed me to decide what was ok and what wasn't." John crossed his arms. "And as your CO, I'm trying to tell you that if you and Lieutenant Cadman want to…pursue this…thing that seems to be between you, then it's ok with me."

Lorne did a double take. "I'm sorry, what?"

"Lorne, we need to adjust to life here," John advised, getting to his feet. "Colonel Carter agrees with me. IN fact, she's quite the closet romantic."

Lorne rose to his feet when John did. "Sir, I don't know what it is. I don't know if she's ready for it."

"It's ok to find out," John repeated. "That's all I'm saying." He rubbed his hands together. "Now, that's done. I'm going to find my son and take him for a walk and explain to him why he shouldn't be playing with McKay's ancient treasure chest."

"Thank you, sir." Lorne held out his hand. "For understanding."

"I fell in love too," John said softly. "Not that I'm saying you're in love, Major. Just that I know what it feels like to be confused." He shook Lorne's hand. "And Lorne?"

"Sir?"

"You've earned the right to some happiness."

* * *

"Out, Evan," Jennifer ordered. "I'll call you if she wakes up. Out!" She put her hands on her hips and glared at him. "You too," she added turning to Ronon, who was loitering in the corner. "God, you lot are as bad as Rodney. I can't get him to leave either."

"Hey!" Rodney protested, making a face at her. "I'm injured!"

"You have a minor laceration and it didn't require ten stitches," Jennifer reminded him. "Now please, this is my world. I am the Queen of my world, and I want you little people out of here!"

Grumbling, Rodney left, muttering about women getting a power trip. John followed him, escorting Teyla back to their quarters.

"Evan Lorne." Jennifer was tapping one small foot on the ground, arms crossed over her chest. "I told you to leave. Don't make me get Ronon to escort you to your quarters."

"I'm going, I'm going, "Lorne groused, getting to his feet and trudging out of the infirmary. Jennifer was grinning as he left. "You're evil, Doc, you know that!"

"Night!" She called after him, turning to Ronon, who was still standing there. "Ronon, you too. I'll be along in a few hours. Dr Biro will be taking over for me then."

He didn't move, just watched her with those eyes that missed nothing.

"Ronon?"

"I love you." He took her hands. "You know that, don't you?"

She pressed a hand to his forehead with a frown. "Are you feeling ok?"

"Jennifer," Ronon growled, dragging her towards her office. "Listen to me." He shoved her into the chair gently, pacing furiously around the small room. "I want you to marry me."

Her jaw dropped. "Sorry, what?"

"I love you." He repeated the phrase almost angrily. "I don't want to lose you. And I want you to be mine."

She smiled indulgently at him, hiding the little ache his words brought on. "I love you too. And I'm already yours, in every way that counts to you."

"Exactly!" Triumphantly, he stopped pacing. "In every way that matters to me. What about what matters to you?"

"You matter to me."

"Then marry me." He took her hands. "I want you to marry me."

"Where has this come from?" Jennifer asked, her heart pounding. "Why now? Why so suddenly?"

"Because I watched you treat Teva and Lieutenant Cadman," Ronon told her. "And I realised that you're it for me. I don't want anyone else."

"And you did before?" Her eyes flashed at him and she surged to her feet. "Ronon, it's late. It's been a long day and you're tired. I don't think that – "

"Marry me." He caught her hands as she passed him. "Jennifer, please."

IT was the please that did it. Ronon never said please. Not even when Teyla asked him to in front of Torrin. She looked up at him, searching his face for some sign that he meant it.

"I mean it," he told her, knowing what she was thinking. "I've wanted to ask you for some time now."

"Then why didn't you?"

"Because I wanted to ask Sheppard what the procedure was," Ronon explained as if it made all the sense in the world. "HE told me that on Earth you have to give a ring. So I got Teyla in on it and she helped me to pick out this one."

Jennifer watched, stunned as he pulled a little cloth bag from his pocket and handed it to her. She took it in trembling fingers and opened it slowly. "You got this for me?"

"I made it for you," he told her, watching as she looked at the ring. "The metal is our equivalent to what you call white gold. It's called kern. And the stone belonged to my mother. Its the only thing I have left from Sateda. It's blue," he added helpfully as her eyes filled. " Your favourite color. You don't like it?"

"I love it," Jennifer told him softly. "And I'd be proud and honoured to be your wife." She handed him the ring and he looked confused. "It's tradition for you to put it on me when I say yes."

He slid the ring onto her finger and scooped her up in his arms, kissing her soundly.

* * *

Lorne neared his quarters and stopped in shock. Something was lying outside his door. He reached for his sidearm and cautiously approached the bundle. He stopped short when it sniffed and launched itself at him.

"Evan?" Cara's face was dirty and tearstained. "Evan, where's Mama? Is she dead?"

He tightened his hold on the child and waved his hands over the door mechanism. Carrying her inside, he set her on the counter and hunkered down so he could look in her eyes. "Honey, what makes you think your Mama is dead?"

"She didn't come home," Cara wailed, beginning to cry piteously. "She always comes home and I heard Lara's mama tell Sarah that it didn't look good for my mama and I wanted to see her and I looked all over and I couldn't find her and I couldn't find you and I don't know how to work the radio ears and I-"

"Cara," Lorne interrupted her rant, wondering how she could say all that and not breathe. "Honey, stop. Your Mom's fine. I just saw her." He watched in dread as her lip trembled and two tears leaked from her blue eyes. "Oh don't baby, don't cry. It's ok."

"I want Mama," Cara sobbed. "Where is she?"

Lorne's heart twisted. Deciding to chastise her for sneaking off on Sarah later, he picked her up and settled into one of the chairs with her on his lap. "Your Mama was hurt when she was offworld. She has a few cuts and some bruises."

"Like when Torrin fell down the stairs and almost went over the railing?" Cara asked curiously.

Lorne smiled. "Like that. She's in the infirmary with Doctor Keller and she's sleeping."

"Can I go and say goodnight?" Cara asked her voice small. "She'll sleep better when I do."

Lorne tapped his earpiece. "Jen, come in."

"Go ahead, Ev. What's up?"

Lorne quickly outlined the situation to her, and asked if he and Cara could drop by for a visit. Cara watched him closely the whole time.

"I don't know, Evan," Jennifer sounded doubtful. "She's awfully young…"

"Jen, she thinks her Mom is dead." Lorne was firm. "I think that she needs to see her."

"Ok," Jennifer said slowly. "Bring her on by. But Ev, if she's traumatised by this, you're telling Laura."

Ten minutes later, Lorne entered the infirmary, carrying Cara in his arms. Jennifer came out of her office. "Hi, Cara." She greeted the child with a bright smile. Cara just looked at her warily. "Honey, your Mom is a little sleepy right now, and she might not know you're here."

Cara wriggled until Lorne set her down. "She'll know," she told Jennifer, turning wise blue eyes to the doctor's. "Is she in there?" She pointed to the cubicle.

Jennifer nodded and watched as Cara approached the curtained cubicle and went through it. "She's old for a four year old," she whispered to Evan. She gestured towards the curtain. "Aren't' you going to go after her?"

Lorne grabbed at her hand. "What's that?"

"That? My engagement ring," Jennifer told him with a grin. She squeaked when he grabbed her in a bear hug. "Put me down!"

He set her on her feet and grinned. "I'm not giving Ronon the big brother talk, " he warned her, setting off towards the cubicle to see what Cara was doing. "He'd break me in half without a thought."

"Mama's asleep?" Cara told him, her voice quivering. "I don't want to wake her."

"Want to sit near her?" Lorne offered, pulling a chair closer to the bed.

Cara considered for a moment before nodding. Lorne was surprised when she climbed into his lap and rested her head on his chest. "Will you stay here too?"

Lorne looked at Jennifer, who nodded. "Sure I will."

Laura chose that exact moment to moan softly and move her hand restlessly on the bed.

"Doc?" Lorne turned to Jennifer, who quickly moved to her patient's side.

"Laura? Can you hear me?"

"Mama?" Cara turned terrified eyes to Lorne. "Is she dying?"

"No, baby," Laura said weakly, struggling to open her eyes. "I'm not dying." Her voice was a croak. She opened her good eye and looked at Lorne. "You're here."

"A good CO stays in the field with his officers," Lorne intoned, grinning like an idiot at her. "And Cara wanted to see you."

Laura looked at her daughter, still held securely in Lorne's arms. "Come here, peanut." She held out her good arm despite the effort it cost her.

Lorne set Cara down on the bed and she immediately snuggled up to her mother, putting her thumb in her mouth and closing her eyes.

"Can she stay a while?" Laura asked, smoothing a hand over her little girl's brown curls. "Please?"

"She can stay until you fall asleep," Jennifer conceded. "At which time I'll be gone to bed. Dr Biro won't look in on you until the morning." Her meaning was clear.

"Thank you," Laura managed to say through the tears spilling out of her eyes. Jennifer smiled and left them alone.

"Hey," Lorne said gently, noticing the tears leaking out of her eye. "It's ok. You're ok now, Laura." He took her hand in his and held it tightly, his mind taking him back to another time when she'd been in an infirmary, sobbing as if her heart would break. All he'd been able to do then was hold her hand.

This time, it would be different.

**My work is calling! I hope ye enjoyed it! Keep reviewing; I love to hear from ye all! **


	7. Remembering The Past

**Wow, I got such a great response to my last chapter that I am inspired to write another one and quickly! Seriously, I am having a great time with my writing, and I find that it's a fantastic way of forgetting (albeit briefly) r/l problems! My only problem is having to drag myself back to earth to do regular stuff like eat and talk to my sister! **

**Lady Ardana: Thank you, I would someday like to have someone propose to me and be ridiculously romantic! So far it's a dream but what the hell! I can live through my characters! **

**Gommeroi: Thank you, I love to hear from readers. Lorne on the show is a little bit of mischief and a lot of military regiment all rolled into one. And nobody can deliver a line with a poker face like Lorne. He's great! I'm glad you like him with Cara; I don't want to stretch things beyond all realism. **

**Asugar: He's great with her, isn't he? He does that by himself, I'm only writing the story lol. I didn't want a dramatic rescue because I think that as a trained Marine she'd be a little better able to handle herself than Keller or even Weir when she was around. Some J/T scenes on the way, there's a baby and all to come yet!**

**Trecebo: Thank you. I think kids react very differently to situations than adults and I want to try and see Atlantis through her eyes as well as the full growns. **

**RowenaR: Wow! I'm honoured that you're reading my story- yours are so good. I thoroughly enjoyed all of your Cadman/Lorne stories. They are really well written and in character. I write Atlantis the way I'd like it to be from now on, especially with Torrin being there. Pretty cool about finding the review right before reading the story. Parallel universes at work maybe (",) **

**Rac80: I'm a big Ronon/Keller fan. If you like that ship, then read Nika Dixon's stories they're brilliant and they're all mainly based on Ronon and Jen. **

**Sachita: Lucky you, Ireland has constant rain at the moment and it's slowly driving me insane! I figured out the document manager at last, thanks though! John and Evan I think are going to be friends as well as colleagues. I mean, when you're millions of light years away from home you have to rework things so that you can survive without going insane! **

**John's Puddle Jumper: More, just for you! Any suggestions/improvements let me know. I'd be delighted to hear from you. **

**Steel Chetah: Thanks, I try to write them all in now and again. Makes for interesting reading and you get to see why they are the way they are without having to wonder. **

**Bailey1ak: Thanks, that was fun to write. Teyla is more astute than they give her credit for I think. She'd be great with the UN! **

**Whirlwind421: That one came to me out of nowhere. I like those fluffy romantic scenes and I'm not losing all hope that Ronon and Jen will get together on the show!**

**Now folks, I'm dying to know what's going on with Teyla and Kanaan, so please keep me in the loop, those of you living stateside who are seeing the new series! My season 4 box set is on the way yippee so I'll have more of Kavan to admire. **

**Chapter 7. Remembering The Past. **

Laura stirred, moaning a little at the pain in her shoulder. She cracked open her good eye to see Cara slumped across her shoulder, fast asleep. The sight brought a smile to her face, even as she winced at the twinge in her lip.

It was the third night in a row Cara had crawled into her bed and slept beside her. Laura was of the opinion that her daughter was terrified that she'd wake up and her mother would be gone again.

Gently easing herself out from under the sleeping child, she made her way to the bathroom and peered in the mirror, grimacing at the sight of her reflection. She'd had stitches on her forehead and her lip looked like she'd gone eight rounds with Mike Tyson. In addition to that, her eye was still swollen and a livid bruise covered the socket and the surrounding area.

She looked like she'd been in a hell of a fight and lost.

Cara was used to her face now, although Evan had told her that she'd been terrified at first. Major Lorne, she told herself. Not Evan. Major Lorne. A superior officer. Get a grip, Cadman.

"Mama?" Cara stood in the doorway, blinking sleep out of her eyes. "Mama, are you alright?"

"I'm fine, baby," Laura smiled, holding out a hand to her. "You hungry?"

Cara nodded and touched her little hands to Laura's face. "You have hurt spots," she said solemnly. "I think that you should put make up on, Mama. Your face is different colours."

"It is, isn't it?" Laura said gravely. "That's a fine idea. Why don't you get dressed and I'll get my funny face covered."

Giggling, Cara went to her own room. Laura heard her voice singing to herself as she got dressed. Turning back to the mirror, she gingerly rolled her shoulder around, wincing as it twinged sharply.

"No shower today either, Laura," she muttered, wondering when she would ever feel normal again.

"Mama, someone's here!" Cara hollered at a pitch loud enough to wake the dead. "The room is ringing!"

Laura smiled at the little girl's description of the chimes. She claimed that since there was no doorbell, then the room was ringing. To hear Cara and Torrin describe how things worked in Atlantis was priceless sometimes. Laura had overheard Torrin telling Cara with all the confidence of youth that the transporter beam broke your body into a million billion tiny pieces and shot them up it the air like a spit ball.

She hurried to the door and ran her hand over the Atlantis equivalent of a doorknob. Teyla and Jennifer stood outside, smiling at her. Trailing along behind them was Torrin.

"Hello," Laura greeted them with an answering smile. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"

Jennifer held up a cosmetics bag in one hand, eyeing Teyla, who held out what looked to be a handful of deep blue material. "We're here to rescue you."

"I'm sorry, what?"

Torrin pushed past her and headed for Cara's room. "They're here to make you pretty instead of scary," he called over his shoulder. "Cara? Where are you?"

Jennifer could only laugh. "Pretty instead of scary?" She looked at Teyla, who simply smiled at her. "He's more like John than you realise."

"That he is," Teyla said with a fond smile. "He's like him in almost every way. It's as if…" She stopped and looked distressed.

"John is Torrin's father." Jennifer laid a hand on her arm. "In every way that counts."

"Teyla, Torrin is a lucky child," Laura agreed. "He's got memories of two fathers that loved him and that would do anything for him. Colonel Sheppard is wonderful with him. He idolises him."

"He does," Teyla agreed, resting a hand on her swollen stomach. "Sometimes I wonder if things will change when this one arrives."

"You'll find out in two weeks," Jennifer pointed out. She was sitting on Laura's couch, legs tucked under her.

"I think that it'll make you more of a family," Laura said softly. "The Colonel is so excited about having a child. Another child," she emphasized. "He talks about having two children. Teyla, he loves them. And he loves you. You have nothing to worry about."

"Thank you," Teyla said, inclining her head in that regal way she had. "You are good friends to me."

"Now how about being good friends to me," Jennifer interrupted, "and agreeing to be my bridesmaids?"

"Really?" Laura stared at Jennifer. "You want me?"

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because I've been away for five years," Laura reminded her. "And you probably have a million friends that you could ask…"

"The only other person besides Teyla I could ask is Carolyn," Jennifer retorted. "And I don't think the SGC will release Cam and Carolyn together."

"Why would they have to release them both?" Laura was puzzled. "They're married, not bound by glue!"

"Cam isn't going to let Caro travel millions of light years without him," Jennifer scoffed. "He's the original overprotective husband." She eyed Laura. "You're it, whether you want to be or not."

"I'd be honoured," Laura smiled. "Just hope I don't have to go offworld and get beaten up again!"

"I thought you would want to stay on the base now," Teyla said carefully.

"I do," Laura admitted, "but that would mean that I'm letting fear get in the way of my life. I let that happen once before. I won't let it happen again." She took a deep breath. "I don't want Cara to be afraid, and how will she be anything else if she sees me hanging back. Besides." Now she grinned. "I want to make Captain this time."

Jennifer hugged her, wincing when she stiffened. "Sorry. Forgot the ribs. I'm proud of you."

"As am I," Teyla cut in. "Now, shall we get to the business at hand?"

"What's that?"

"The party that is being held in honour of Jennifer and Ronon's engagement tonight," Teyla replied. "You cannot go with that hair."

"Hey!" Laura protested as tears filled her eyes.

"Oh don't," Jennifer begged as her own eyes filled. "You know I don't do other people crying."

The chimes pealed again, and Laura got up to go to the door, wiping at her eyes as she did so. Sam Carter stood outside it. When she saw Teyla and Jennifer, she smiled. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you."

"Nonsense," Teyla scoffed. "Sam, you are to be part of this ritual also."

"What ritual?"

"Of getting pretty," Jennifer declared. "For the party I'm not supposed to know about." She grinned at Sam's crestfallen face. "Teyla told me."

"I did not!" Teyla protested hotly. "I was…unaware that it was a secret."

"Diaper brain," Jennifer proclaimed with a roll of her eyes. "She's got it bad."

Laura was watching the exchange with interest. Sam noticed her and gestured to her to sit down. "We're in your quarters, Laura. You don't mind if I call you Laura off the clock, do you?"

"No ma'am," Laura answered, wincing as Torrin and Cara came barrelling out of Cara's room and threw themselves at Sam.

"Hi, Sam," Cara hollered, bouncing up and down. "Torrin says there's a party later. Another party! Can we go? Can we, Mama? If Sam says it's ok, can we go?"

"If Colonel Carter," Laura gently corrected, "says it's ok, then you can go. And not too late, either, young lady."

"Thank you, Mama!" Cara threw her arms around her mother. "You're the best Mama in the world."

"She is not," Torrin argued fiercely. "My Mama is the best Mama."

Cara gave him a mutinous glare. "You're so wrong," she declared, making Laura's jaw drop. "My Mama got shot at and she got almost beated to death and she still looks like Mama!"

"Enough, you two," Laura interrupted. "It's time you went to see Sarah. I believe she has some work for you to do!"

"I'll take them," Jennifer said with a smile. "I'll be back to get you dressed. Don't get those cuts wet," she added with a glare. "Come on, little people. Let's go to school!"

"She's different," Laura commented.

"Atlantis is different," Sam corrected with a small smile. "It's…more like a city than a military base now."

"It's nothing like it used to be," Laura said sadly. "Everything has changed."

"Laura," Sam began, "I know that it was hard for you to come back here. I admire the fact that you did."

"Thank you, ma'am."

"Enough of this mush," Jennifer declared, coming back into the room. "You shouldn't leave your door open like that, Laura."

"Agreed," Lorne said, sauntering into the room. "Ma'am," he added, nodding to Sam. "Teyla, Colonel Sheppard asked me to tell you that he wants to see you in the infirmary."

"What has happened?" Teyla demanded, struggling to her feet. "Has he been sparring with Ronon again?"

"Affirmative," Lorne told her with a smile. "He's fine. Nothing broken. Jen, Ronon will probably need a few stitches, though."

"Oh for God's sake," Jennifer huffed, getting to her feet and hurrying after Teyla. "And to think I agreed to marry him!"

"Go ahead, Radek," Sam said suddenly, tapping her earpiece and sending them an apologetic look. "I'm on my way." She turned to Laura. "Sorry to break up the party. I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"Thank you, Ma'am," Laura replied. "It was nice of you."

When she was gone, Lorne turned to Laura. His blue gaze roamed over the bruising on her face. "You look like hell."

"Thank you, sir," she said sarcastically. "That's always nice to hear."

He shrugged. "Just being honest."

"You men are all the same," Laura huffed, getting off the couch and facing him directly. "Honest is one way of putting it."

"You want me to lie?" Lorne demanded. "You look like someone beat the hell out of you."

"They did," Laura said tightly. "Or didn't you read the mission report. Sir."

Lorne sighed. "Ok, so I was a little…"

"Blunt?"

"Blunt." He eyeballed her. "But you do look a little pale. Are you sleeping?"

His concern unnerved her, but for the life of her she couldn't say why. He was watching her intently, those serious blue eyes trained directly on hers as if he was waiting for her to say something. She met his gaze head on, daring him to ask the question.

"Have you spoken to Doctor Haran?"

"No," she answered. "I was busy trying to reassure my four year old that I wasn't going to either die or disappear."

"How's she doing?" Lorne decided that changing the subject would be wise. "She seemed ok when I met her in the corridor a while ago."

"She's excited about the party tonight," Laura said with a grimace. "I wish she wasn't."

"Why?"

"I'm not exactly looking the best right now," she answered, gesturing to her bruised face. "I don't feel like going to a party. But Jennifer asked me to be a bridesmaid, so I better make my appearance."

"I'm sure Jen and Teyla will make you over," Lorne told her. "They love to do that stuff. They gave Colonel Carter a makeover for Colonel Sheppard's wedding." He laughed. "Colonel Mitchell and General O'Neill almost swallowed their respective tongues."

Laura didn't smile. She shifted her weight from foot to foot, making him wonder what she was hiding. He looked more closely at her. In her bare feet and baggy sweatpants, she looked young and fragile. He knew that she was both and neither at the same time.

"I never said thank you."

"Huh?"

Now she did smile. "I seem to be thanking you since I got here." She looked up at him. "I want to thank you for helping Cara. When I was…in the infirmary when I…"

"She's a great kid."

"That she is," Laura agreed. "She's wonderful. And she loves you already. She's always talking about Evan this and Evan that. She's smitten."

"I like spending time with her," Lorne said simply. "She's fun. I have nephews. They're twelve and ten now. I haven't seen them since they were kids." He shrugged. "I like kids."

Laura peered up at him from under her lashes, wishing that this fluttering in her stomach would stop. It was merely chemical, she told herself. She hadn't been with a man since…oh no. No, no and no. She was not going there!

"Ok, well, now that I've determined you're ok," Lorne said lightly, wondering what was making her cheeks flush, "I'll be able to report to Colonels Sheppard and Carter that you're not hiding out in your room for any reason other than simple female vanity."

Laura threw him a sour look. "At the risk of being insubordinate, you can leave now."

He grinned. "There she is. The Cadman Rodney swears exists under your Mom persona."

She tossed a cushion at him. "Goodbye, sir!"

"See you, Cadman."

* * *

"So then he just whipped the ring out of his pocket and proposed," Jennifer told a group of the female scientists, who sighed in unison and looked over at Ronon.

"You're flavour of the month," John commented, laughing at the Satedan's grumpy face. "Come on, Ronon. Enjoy it while it lasts. When you're married, it's a whole other ball game."

"Good evening, gentlemen," Teyla greeted them, giving her husband a sweet smile that he recognised as deadly. "And how are you all?"

"Discussing married life, actually," Rodney put in, enjoying John's look of discomfort. "John here says it's- ow!" He glared at John, who looked innocently at him.

"Painful?" Teyla asked, arching an eyebrow at them.

"Not at all," John hurried to correct her. "It's wonderful."

Teyla rolled her eyes. "I know you, John Sheppard. Do not try to pull thread over my eyes."

"Wool," Lorne corrected. "It's wool, not thread." He turned to his CO. "Can't you teach her Earth speak, sir?"

It was John's turn to roll his eyes. "Can't you drop the sir for one night, Lorne? It makes me feel old."

With a laugh, Lorne nodded. The smile was wiped right off his face seconds later as the transporter opened and Laura entered, holding Cara by the hand. The moment the little girl caught sight of Lorne she squealed and made a beeline for them.

"Hi, Evan! Hello, Colonel John!" Cara held up her arms and looked at Lorne, who was happy to comply. "Hello, Cara," John said gravely. "You look very pretty tonight."

Cara giggled. "I know. Mama said so too. This is my party dress. Do you like it?"

Lorne studied the pink dress and matching shoes. "You look like a princess. Can we call you princess?"

Cara giggled again. "That's what Colonel Cam calls me. Even Tealc calls me Princess Cara Beckett. Only he has a real funny voice. He says 'indeed' a awful lot."

John's lips twitched. "Does he really. Any more secrets you want to share with us?"

"I think that's enough for one night," Laura said, coming to take Cara from Lorne. "Cara, come on, Let's get you something to eat."

Cara merely looped her arms around Lorne's neck and held on. Laura looked apologetically at him and held out her hand again. "Cara, come on, honey."

"She's ok," Lorne told her. "When she gets heavy I'll toss her over the balcony."

Cara squeaked in delight and wriggled furiously, holding out her arms to Rodney. "Rodney, make me fly like you did the last time!"

Rodney shook his head at the questioning glances his colleagues shot him. "I have no idea what she's talking about."

"Rodney, did you practise Ancient voodoo on my daughter?" Laura demanded, eyeing him menacingly.

"Certainly not!" Rodney exclaimed, backing away." I was only tossing her in the air and – oh, right. I see. Ok, you caught me." He held out his arms with a resigned air. "Come on, then. Let's make you fly."

"Never fails to amaze me," Sam commented, wandering over to join them. "Rodney McKay and the Atlantis kids."

"He's a natural," Laura felt compelled to stick up for the scientist. "He'll be a great father. What happened to that pretty botanist he was dating?"

"He asked her to marry him," Lorne told her. "In the middle of a lockdown."

When Laura's eyebrows shot up, he continued. "He thought he was dying. By the time he realised he was being an idiot, she was gone home on the Daedalus."

"Poor Rodney," Laura said sympathetically. "That must have been hard on him."

John snorted. "Yeah. Makes you want to hug him."

"Or kill him," Ronon added. "He was unbearable for the first six months after she left. Then he went back to being McKay."

"And that's bearable how?" Lorne chimed in.

"Enough of the Rodney bashing," Laura ordered. "He's great with Cara. That's enough for me."

"We like to tease him," John explained. "Watch and learn, Cadman."

* * *

"How are you doing?" Teyla sidled up to Lorne, who was watching as Laura chatted amiably with Rodney. "Are you enjoying the festivities?"

"It's a great party," Lorne answered honestly. "You look great, by the way. You ladies did a real number on yourselves."

Teyla smiled that smile Lorne thought of as essentially female. "It is nice to get dressed up now and again." She smiled at him. "We have lives outside of these uniforms, you know."

Lorne rolled his eyes. "You haven't been able to fit into a uniform for months now."

"Upsetting my wife, Major?"

"No sir. Absolutely not."

"John, Evan and I were talking about our outfits," Teyla explained to her husband. "Do you like them?"

John cocked his head to the side, taking in her deep purple dress. The Athosian women had made the garment especially for the occasion and she looked spectacular. He couldn't help but feel a certain sense of male satisfaction when he saw her hands resting on the swell of her belly, his rings glinting on the left hand.

She'd insisted on wearing the rings according to Earth tradition, saying she wanted something that branded her as his. In return, he wore the engraved ring that had belonged to her father on his ring finger.

"John?" Teyla prompted him, a smile teasing her lips.

"Sorry. You look amazing." He eyed her suspiciously. "I already told you that. Is this a test?"

Lorne snorted, quickly turning it into a cough as John glared at him. "Sorry." He looked frantically around for some means of escape. Spotting Ronon, he immediately headed for the Satedan.

"You do look amazing," John said softly to Teyla. "How are you feeling? Want to sit down? Want something to eat? Drink?"

Teyla put her hand on his arm, the touch instantly soothing him. "I am feeling fine, John. In fact, I feel better tonight than I have in quite some time."

"You were feeling sick?" His look of horror was comical. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Teyla rolled her eyes at him. "I did not say that. I merely said that I feel better tonight than I have for some time."

He narrowed his eyes for a moment, and then nodded. "You'd tell me if you didn't feel ok, wouldn't you?"

She grinned. "When have I ever held back from you to spare your feelings before?"

"When you were pregnant with Torrin," John retorted, and instantly wished he hadn't as her something seemed to close in her eyes. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded."

"I understand." Teyla gave him a tight smile. "Please excuse me. I must see what my son is up to."

John reached out for her arm. "Teyla, wait."

"It's fine, John. I need to use the ladies room." She shrugged off his arm and headed for the exit. Out of the corner of his eye, John saw Jennifer break from Ronon's hold and go after her. Laura immediately looked up from where she was talking to one of the linguists and frowned. He closed his eyes briefly and signalled to Lorne.

"Sir?" Lorne caught the dangerous glint in John's eye and swallowed. "Sorry. What's up?"

"Keep Cadman from following Teyla, would you? Those gals stick together tighter than a bunch of ticks."

Lorne was puzzled, but figured his CO needed someone to have his back. "Got it. Go."

John clapped a hand on his shoulder and headed to have a word in Ronon's ear. The two men headed out after their respective wives.

"What's going on there?" Laura wanted to know. She sidled up to him, her face flushed from her earlier dancing with Cara and Torrin. "Is Teyla ok? She's not in labour is she?"

Lorne blanched. "God, no. I hope not anyway. Jennifer's been drinking!"

"Please," Laura scoffed. "She's had three glasses of that stuff you lot call champagne and she's better able to hold it than you are!"

Lorne eyed her warily. "Are you ok?"

She smiled at him. "Yes, sir. I'm fine."

"Drop the sir," he growled. "We're off duty and I feel old when you call me that."

"Sorry. Major." Laura relented when she saw his glare. "Ok, ok, I'll behave. Sorry, Evan."

"That's better. Now, what was I saying?"

"You were telling me why Teyla and Jen went rushing out of here with their respective hunky partners after them," Laura supplied helpfully. "Did the Colonel upset Teyla?"

Lorne looked suspiciously at her. "Is there something I should know?"

Laura shook her head. "No, nothing. I think that Teyla needs some reassurance. It's tough being pregnant and feeling all fat and swollen and like you're never going to get your body back." She smiled ruefully. "The last few weeks feel like months."

Lorne looked sideways at her. "Did it feel like that for you?"

She took a deep breath. "Yes. For me, being pregnant was hard. They were incredibly good to me at the SGC. They were like family."

"But…"

"But I wanted Carson to be there. I had nobody to talk to when I was afraid that I wasn't doing the right thing or that I was going to breathe wrong when I was in labour and _why_ am I telling you this?" Her face was pink. "I think I should lay off the champagne!"

"It was hard on you, wasn't it" He looked directly at her. "Being without him."

Her eyes were incredibly sad as she gazed at her daughter. "I never felt so alone in my life."

He reached out and squeezed her hand gently. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"I wasn't alone when she was born," Laura told him. "I had all of the SGC hanging around the infirmary."

"She was born at Stargate Command?" Lorne was amazed. "How in the hell did that happen?"

Laura laughed at his face. "I went to visit Carolyn. She was just starting to date Cameron – Colonel Mitchell- at that stage and being me, I wanted to see how things were going. I'd been feeling a little squicky."

"You're listening to your kid way too much," he told her with a roll of his eyes.

"Are you interested in hearing this or not?" she demanded, thumping him on the arm.

"Ok, ok. Please, continue."

"When I went into the infirmary, she was finishing putting stitches in Vala. SG1 had been in some sort of shootout offworld and Vala was hit. Daniel was hovering like a bee. Carolyn wanted to swat him away. Anyway, I waddled in, big as a house."

"Waddled?" He held up a hand. "Sorry. You're talking."

"Thank you. I plopped myself into a chair and listened to Colonel Mitchell go on about how Daniel was getting soft now that he was in love. Tealc was saying 'indeed' in that way he has. When Carolyn dismissed them, I got up. Training, you know. Rise when your superior officer does. "

They had wandered to the door as they talked, the night breeze blowing her strawberry blonde hair around her face. Lorne was watching her intently, waiting for her to continue.

"I got to my feet, and whoosh."

"Whoosh?"

"Whoosh," she repeated. "My water broke."

"Oh God." His face was pure male discomfort. "What did they say?"

Laura began to laugh. "Colonel Mitchell turned about eighty shades of green. Daniel thought I'd wet myself and Vala passed out. Blood loss. Tealc merely told me in that calm way of his that he believed that my time to procreate had arrived and that he wished me luck."

"Didn't you know you were in labour?"

"No," she admitted. "I thought that it was my back hurting. Must be all that Marine training."

"So you had Cara in the infirmary."

"I did. She was born two hours later." Laura's eyes were soft as she remembered. "She was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. Bar none."

"I'll bet," Lorne said. He was thinking the same about her right now.

"SG1 came in as soon as Carolyn let them. Colonel Mitchell was like Mr Mom. He picked her up and he and Vala fought like dogs over who got to hold her."

"Who won?" Lorne asked curiously.

"General Landry. He came in and ordered Colonel Mitchell to hand her over this minute. Right after he hauled me over for trying to stand up in his presence."

"Mama!" Cara came towards her, rubbing her eyes. "Mama, where did you go? I want a drink."

"I think somebody's a little sleepy," Laura confided to Lorne. She winked at him and went to get Cara some of the fruit juice Sarah Larson was keeping for the children. Being the oldest on the base, Cara and Torrin were usually the only ones who went to the welcome parties. All the other children were deemed too young.

"Evan?" Cara looked at him. "I'm sleepy."

Lorne scooped her into his arms. "It's early," he said, concerned when she laid her head on his shoulder. "Does she feel a little hot to you?" The question was directed at Laura, who had returned with Cara's juice.

Instantly concerned, she laid a hand on Cara's forehead. "A little, " she said slowly. "Baby, do you feel sick?"

Cara shook her head, snuggling closer against Lorne, who shrugged. "It could be the heat in here."

"I should take her to bed." Laura reached out for her daughter. "Come on, Miss Beckett. Bed time for you."

Cara whimpered and shied away from her. "Want Evan."

Laura sighed. "Evan has to stay here. Come on, I'll take you."

"It's ok," Lorne said quickly. "I'll take her down and come on back up."

"I can do it," Laura said stiffly. "She has to learn that she can't always get what she wants."

Lorne hitched Cara up more securely. "Not today, she doesn't." He followed Laura out of the room, ignoring the speculative glances and the muted whispers. "And you don't have to do everything on your own. That shoulder still isn't totally healed. It's ok to lean on people, you know."

"I've been fine on my own for five years, " Laura retorted, pressing the button for the family quarters. "We've been fine."

"Laura." Lorne's voice was firm. "You're not alone anymore. You have a family here. If you want it."

She nodded. "I'm beginning to see that."

* * *

"Evan? Evan, come in."

Lorne rolled over in bed at the sound of his radio. Grappling for it in the dark, he pressed it to his ear. "Go ahead."

"It's Laura."

He sat up, instantly alert. He'd left her at her door with a sleeping Cara in his arms only a few hours ago. She'd given him an awkward one-armed hug, the child and her still tender shoulder getting in her way.

"Cara's sick," Laura said, sounding frantic. "She's burning up and I can't raise Jen on the radio. I'm sorry, I don't know what else to do."

He was already getting out of bed and dashing towards her quarters.

**Another cliffie! I hope ye liked this one and sorry it's a little longer than usual. I was full of ideas for it!! Please review! **


	8. Lean on Me

**Wow I'm up to 58 reviews already! How cool is that!! Guys I really appreciate the fact that you all like the story. It means so much. I hope ye like this one. And to those who enjoyed the idea of Cam Mitchell turning green, I'm going to go back to that at some stage. Seems like everyone loves Mitchell! **

**Andromeda: She's been independent for so long it's almost alien for her to lean on anyone. Add to that attraction to Evan and you've got some fireworks in the wings for her! **

**John's Puddle Jumper: Still love that pen name! Sorry about the cliff-hangers, I'm mean I know. Cara is gorgeous I have such fun with her and she's got a pivotal role to play in the next few chapters too! Thanks for the reviews and the encouragement! **

**Trecebo: That's a great idea! I'm definitely going to use that one in the next chapter. I love Ben. I really do I think he was great in Farscape with Claudia Black and he's amazing in SG1 as Cam Mitchell. There is a crossover in the future too (oops, spoiler! That's all you're getting though lol). **

**SteelCheetah: Hope that by the time you read this, you'll either be on hols or else back. If you're on hols, hope you're enjoying them. If you're back, same goes. **

**Sachita: The doc manager thing was just for you and I have to agree it makes it much easier to read thanks for that tip! We actually got a fine day yesterday and it was fantastic. I'm a wonderful shade of pink now but that'll tan eventually. I'm delighted with the sunburn that's how bad it's gotten here in Ireland. It's pouring again today so I don't know anymore. As for Cara, you'll have to wait and see about her but I'm attached to her myself so I don't think she'll be going anywhere!**

**RowenaR: Loving your stories about Lorne and Cadman, btw, they're fantastic! I can't wait for the season 4 set. I'm watching the post every day for it and I know I won't be able to sleep until I watch at least one disc per night so I don't plan on sleeping too much when it does get here. Thanks for the compliment. I learned to write as I hear them in my head, if that makes sense. Not that I hear voices in my head! I just…hear them in my head (",)**

**Bailey1ak: Thanks; she's having a hard time leaning on anyone but herself. I think she's a little bit of an ice queen but if anyone can melt her it's Lorne. **

**Asugar: Wow, where do I start! You give great reviews; they really help me to see where I'm going right and to keep doing it. I will be going into more detail about Teyla and Kanaan soon, that's a great idea and I', going to run with it soon. And also, Kanaan's demise is going to be explained in this chap, so advance apologies if it's too long. I have so many ideas for it. She has to come back to life at some stage, she can't mourn Carson forever it's just not human. But she's scared. You'll see a change starting in her soon though. I can't take any more heartbreak! **

**Allie108: Hi, I don't think I've heard from you before. Thanks for stopping in, it's great to hear from newcomers. Cara is sick alright you'll have to wait and see how bad though. I'm glad you like the story and delighted you reviewed-thanks so much!**

**Tripwatcher2: I know, I'm a wagon (that's an insult in Ireland believe it or not!). I'm blushing with all your compliments, thanks a mil. I'm writing, I'm writing – slave driver!!**

**Oma Desallah: Hello and welcome, great to hear from you. I'm glad you like it. Cara is great fun to write. Hope you enjoy the new chapter! **

**Chapter 8. Lean on Me. **

When Lorne reached the family quarters, Laura was peering out into the corridor, looking for him. The look of relief on her face when he hurried towards her was evident. So was the panic and terror.

"What happened?" Lorne demanded, following her into the room she slept in. "What's going on?"

"I can't wake her up," Laura repeated in that same terrified voice he'd heard moments before through the radio. "She's burning up, Evan. Feel her head."

He placed a hand on the child's forehead, his eyes darkening with concern as he felt the heat radiating off her. "She's got a fever." He scooped her up, blankets and all, into his arms. "Come on. We need to get her to the infirmary."

"I couldn't lift her," Laura was babbling as she dashed after him. "My shoulder…I couldn't pick her up. Oh God, what's wrong with her."

"Try Jennifer again on the radio. She'll know what to do."

"Jennifer, please come in. Please…" Laura was frantic.

"Go ahead," Jennifer's sleepy voice said in her ear. "What is it?"

"Oh thank God," Laura sighed. "Jen, its Cara. She's sick. I can't wake her. She's got a raging fever and – "

"I'm on my way," Jennifer said firmly. "Take her to the Infirmary. I'll meet you there. Dr Nelson is on duty, I think. Tell him what's going on."

"What did she say?" Lorne demanded, activating the transporter beam.

"She's on her way," Laura told him, her gaze focused on her daughter. "Evan, what if she's really sick?"

Cara was lying limply in Lorne's arms. Her little face was flushed and she was breathing heavily. Beads of sweat made her curls cling damply to her head. She stirred a little and moaned.

"Cara?" Laura took one of the small hands in hers. "Cara, can you hear me? It's Mama."

"Come on, Princess," Lorne coaxed as the door opened and they found themselves outside the infirmary. "Open those pretty eyes for me."

Cara twisted her head to the side and moaned again. "Mama."

"Right here, baby," Laura soothed, tears filling her eyes. "Mama's here."

"What have we got?" Jennifer strode into the room, her competent air and matter of fact manner instantly making Laura feel better. "Hey, little lady," she crooned to Cara, reaching out to take her from Lorne, who hesitated, then released her to the doctor. "What's up with you?"

"I went to bed," Laura was telling Jennifer as she began to examine the child. "She was a little fussy at the party, and she's had a slight cold, so I didn't think anything of it." She turned to Lorne. "You told me she felt a little hot. I thought it was the heat in the room mixed with the cold she's had."

"It was hot there," Lorne told her. "You couldn't have known she was sick."

"I'm her mother," Laura said flatly. "It's my job to know."

"Laura," Jennifer interrupted. "When did you notice the fever?"

"She comes into my bed with me sometimes." Laura was stroking her daughter's hand gently. "Since I was captured offworld. She has bad dreams. So she comes into me and snuggles."

"The fever," Jennifer prompted gently, listening to Cara's chest and taking her pulse.

"Sorry." Laura blinked. "I noticed it when I woke up a few minutes ago. It was so hot, I pulled the blankets down. Then I realised that it was Cara that was hot."

"Her temp is pretty high," Jennifer mused. "Has she had all her shots?"

"All of them," Laura confirmed. "Every one. Carolyn gave them to her."

"Ok." Jennifer took a long needle from the tray beside her. She filled it with a clear liquid. "Any allergies?"

Laura was staring in horror at the hypodermic Jennifer held in her hand. She was a combat trained Marine. She'd come up against Wraith, replicators and the Ori. She'd been injured in the field and seen men and women die. But the sight of Jennifer brandishing a needle and sticking it into her four year old made her sick to her stomach.

"Laura?"

"Yes. What? Allergies. Um, no. She's never been sick, Jen. Not beyond a few ear infections when she was teething and a sprained wrist when she fell off the ramp in the Gate room back at the SGC. Oh, and the time she was hiding under Colonel Mitchell's bed in the infirmary and she needed stitches on her head after she bumped it." She was babbling nervously, pressing one hand to her stomach as she watched Jennifer slide the needle smoothly under Cara's skin. "Oh, God."

"All done," Jennifer said soothingly. "I'm going to run this blood and see what it tells us. Her breathing is a little shallow, so I'd like to get some oxygen into her to see if that'll help. It sounds like she has a slight respiratory infection as a result of the cold."

"Could that have come on so quickly?" Lorne spoke up from his post at the foot of Cara's bed. "She was fine yesterday, Jen. And you saw her at the party. She was fine!"

"I haven't done paeds in quite some time," Jennifer said with a reassuring smile. "But kids are amazingly resilient to some things, and can be affected very quickly by others."

"What exactly is wrong with her?" Lorne asked, seeing that Laura was unable to speak. "Do you know?"

"I'll know more when I get her blood results," Jennifer replied. "It'll take me about a half hour. In the meantime, she's stable."

"Why hasn't she woken up?" Laura asked worriedly. "She's just _lying_ there."

"Her body is fighting off the fever," Jennifer said gently. "When children are sick, they tend to be what we call thrown down. It just means that they're fighting off the disease. She's going to be pretty sluggish. It's normal."

"Disease?" Laura turned so pale that Lorne was sure she was going to faint. He immediately moved behind her, ready to catch her if necessary. "Disease?"

"I know you're worried," Jennifer said, moving to take Laura's hand in hers. "But I'm a damn good doctor. I won't let anything happen to her. I promise you that."

Laura nodded, her eyes going back to the still form on the bed. "I'm staying with her."

"That's fine," Jennifer agreed. "She's going to sleep for a while yet. I started her on a course of penicillin. If she has some sort of infection, then I want some antibiotics in her to fight it off. "

"Jennifer." Laura's voice was strained. When the doctor turned back to her, she turned imploring eyes to hers. "She's all I have." Unable to go on, she turned away.

"I know." Jennifer squeezed her shoulder. "I know."

* * *

Lorne watched Laura sit next to Cara's bed and talk to her softly. Observing her, he was taken back to a time when he and his sister had been laid up with measles when he'd been ten. He'd been hit pretty badly, with raging temperatures and a nasty rash that his sister had managed to escape. His mother had sat with him when he was going through the worst of it, murmuring words of comfort to him. He hadn't been able to understand some of it, but the sound of her voice had soothed him.

Laura was still in her pajamas, her hair falling around her pale face and her feet bare. The green tank top and matching shorts showed off the bruising on her arms and legs. She was shifting uncomfortably on the hard chair, making him wonder if she was still hurting.

"Laura?"

She looked up when he called her name. "Yes?"

"Want me to get someone to get you some clothes?"

She looked down, noticing for the first time her attire. "I didn't even think. I'm sorry. Would you mind asking Captain Moran's wife to get some of my things from my quarters?"

"Laura?" Jennifer stood outside the cubicle Cara was sleeping in. "I've got her blood work back." She gestured to Laura follow her. "It shows significantly high levels of white blood cells."

"What does that mean?"

"She's got an infection," Jennifer translated. "I don't know exactly where, but it's pretty severe. I need to get her on IV antibiotics immediately."

Laura nodded, feeling as if her insides were twisting together. "Whatever you have to do."

Jennifer put a hand on her arm. "You might want to stay out here for this. I'll send Evan out too."

Lorne joined her seconds later. "What's going on? Jen booted me out of there."

"She's putting an IV line in." Laura felt sick. "Blood work showed an infection. They don't know where or what caused it."

She was trembling as she paced the room, her bare feet making no noise on the tiled floor of the infirmary. He folded his arms across his chest, resisting the urge to fold them around her instead. "That's good, right. They can treat something they know is there."

"Laura!" Jen's voice from inside the curtain made them both swing around. "Laura!"

"What? What's wrong?"

Jennifer was pointing to a cut on Cara's thigh. "Where did she get this?"

Laura stared at the cut, sickened by the sight of the angry red skin around it. It was obviously infected. "I don't know," she whispered. "I have no idea. She had a bath the day before yesterday but I was working and didn't have time yesterday. Oh God, I should have seen it."

"It's infected," Jennifer told her. "Laura, I need to drain it and clean it out or she'll get blood poisoning."

Laura could only nod. "Do it."

"Do what?" Lorne demanded, poking his head around the curtain again. "What are you – whoa? Where did she get that cut?"

"I don't know!" Laura snapped out. "I don't know because I was off world being held hostage. I don't know how or when exactly she got it. I'm a bad mother." Tears were running down her face. "I don't know how she got this cut that could cause her to-". She trailed off as she watched Jennifer clean out the infection.

"God," Lorne muttered as she finished and took swiftly inserted an IV into the child's wrist. "How can you do that?"  
Cara didn't even twitch as Jennifer covered the infected area with a bandage and tucked the covers around her.

"I'm the doctor and you're the soldier."

"Thank God for that." Lorne turned to Laura and noticed the tears. "Laura, don't." He moved towards her but she held up one hand. "Laura?"

"Don't. Just don't. I can't…if you…Just don't. Ok?"

"Ok." He watched her carefully. "But at least sit down. You're as pale as a sheet."

She dropped into a chair and he followed Jennifer out of the cubicle. "Jen? Want to give me a sit-rep?"

Jennifer eyed him. "You first."

"Not the time, Doc," he warned. "Let's have it straight. What are we looking at here?"

"She's got a severe infection," Jennifer told him seriously. "That cut is infected and I think it may have already entered the bloodstream. Her breathing is a little choppy, but the oxygen vent in her nose will help that."

"She's going to be ok, though, isn't she?"

"We'll have to watch her carefully for the next forty eight hours. She's not out of the woods, Ev."

Lorne exhaled slowly. "Crap." He tapped his earpiece, calling for his CO to tell him what had happened.

* * *

Three hours later, the infirmary was full of people demanding to know how Cara was. It appeared that in the weeks Laura and Cara had been here, the little girl had managed to make friends with everyone on the base and was a firm favourite with the military contingent thanks to Torrin's tendency to wander about.

"People, please." Jennifer clapped her hands together. "I can't have you all clogging up my space." She flapped her hands at the various expedition members hovering around the room. "Out! Out! All of you!"

Ronon simply folded his arms and took his usual relaxed seat in her chair. John mirrored his friend, opting to lean against the wall and give the other chair to Teyla, who sat on it firmly. Rodney began to mutter about a pain in his stomach and Lorne just planted his boots on the ground and looked right back at her.

"Oh for God's sake." Jennifer threw up her hands. "Ok, you can stay. Just you lot, mind you. The rest of you, you're not on Cadman's team, so you can all just go."

Grumbling, the people loitering around made their way out of the room, each of them appealing for news as soon as it came through.

"Good God," Jennifer breathed, relieved. "It's like trying to walk in treacle!"

"Doc?" John stood upright. "What's the story? What's she got? And is Torrin likely to get it?"

"She's got an infected cut on her leg," Jennifer told them. "It's pretty bad. The next forty-eight hours should be the test. If she can break the fever, then she'll be ok."

"And if not?" Lorne asked, the muscle in his jaw twitching. "What then?"

"Then we're looking at more serious consequences," Jennifer said gravely. "I'll have to wait and see."

"How is Laura?" Teyla wanted to know "Is she in need of company?"

"One of you at a time," Jennifer answered. "And Teyla, I think that you should restrict your visits. I don't want you exposed to any bugs that aren't necessary at this stage of things."

"I'll drink to that," John stated firmly stepping forward to Teyla's side.

"I know my limits." Teyla gave him one look and he backed away. "I would like to go in there and see her now, please."

Jennifer gestured towards the cubicle and nodded. "Go ahead." Turning to John as soon as Teyla was out of earshot, she asked the question that had been niggling at her since they'd come in. "Is she ok?"

John shrugged, clearly uncomfortable with the turn the discussion had taken. "She's getting antsy. She was like this towards the end of the pregnancy with Torrin, too."

"Ok." Jennifer wasn't convinced. "If she seems upset, then just do whatever you can to keep her calm. She shouldn't be stressing out."

* * *

"She's so little." Laura's voice broke and she fought to keep it steady as Teyla put a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I can't do anything for her."

"She is a strong child," Teyla stated in that calm way of hers. "And her mother is strong and brave."

"I don't feel brave. I feel like falling apart and I know I can't until she wakes up." Laura kept her eyes on Cara's sleeping face. "Teyla, what if something happens to her?"

Teyla wrapped a comforting arm around her friend's shaking shoulders. "Laura, did I tell you about the time Torrin was almost abducted?"

"No."

"It was when he was a baby. Kanaan and I were both offworld at the Athosian settlement. John and Ronon were taking care of Torrin." She settled into a chair beside Laura, nodding at Lorne when he poked his head around the curtain.

"_Teyla, come in please." The radio crackled in her ear. "Teyla?" _

_She looked at Kanaan, who was walking along beside her. The mission had been successful. Her people had managed to harvest enough crops to keep them through the winter season and into the next harvest. It had been a truly good year._

"_What is it?" Kanaan asked, concerned. "Is it Torrin?" _

"_Go ahead," Teyla instructed to John, who had called her. "What is it?" _

"_Michael." _

_The one word had been enough to send her running for the gate, fear unlike any she'd ever experienced making her run as if she had wings on her feet. Kanaan crashed through the undergrowth after her, calling out to her. She ignored both him and John's voice in her ear. _

"I had never known fear like it," Teyla admitted. "It was as if…"

"Your heart was ripped out?" Laura offered, looking at her.

"Yes." Teyla nodded. "I made my way to the gate and dialled Atlantis. Kanaan came through the gate at my side."

"_Where is he?" She skidded to a halt in the Gate room, Kanaan at her side, looking around frantically for Torrin. "Ronon, what is happening?" _

"_Come with me, both of you." Ronon held out a hand to Teyla and nodded to Kanaan. "This way." _

_They followed the Satedan through the room and to the transporter. Ronon activated it, sending them to the science wing. _

"_Why are we here?" Teyla turned terrified eyes to Ronon. "Where is Torrin? Ronon, please." _

"_This way," was all he said, turning them down to Rodney's office. "He's in here." _

_Two marines stood outside the door, armed to the hilt. They nodded to Ronon and one of them, whom Teyla recognised as Captain Kerrigan, waved his hands over the door opening. Torrin lay in his crib beside a pale and visibly shaken Rodney._

"_Torrin." Teyla's knees buckled and she half walked, half staggered to the chair beside the crib. Rodney was standing guard, armed to the teeth with his p-90 and every other available sidearm and weapon he could find. _

"_He's fine," the scientist assured Teyla as she grabbed the sleeping baby from the rocker. "They won't get past me." _

"_Or me," Kanaan added, getting to his feet. He faced Ronon squarely. "Where can I get a weapon such as the one Dr McKay has?" _

"_Kanaan." Teyla got to her feet, their son still cradled in her arms. "Do not attempt to be a hero." _

"_I'm not," he told her, a smile forming on his face as he watched her hold Torrin in her arms. "I'm helping to protect what's mine." _

_Teyla hesitated, and then stepped forward to place a brief kiss on his lips. "Be safe," she whispered to him. _

_Kanaan kissed Torrin gently on his forehead and looked at Rodney with a nod. The scientist nodded back, understanding that this was a critical moment he had been allowed to witness. He and Teyla could only watch as Kanaan followed Ronon out of the room._

"What happened?" Laura looked at Teyla, who was staring into space at something only she could see. "To Kanaan, I mean. We heard that he'd…that…"

"Michael laid siege to the city," Teyla continued. She was unaware that John had slipped into the little cubicle and was watching her intently. "It was like he was possessed by something. He wanted Torrin."

"_Give me the child, and I will allow your people to live." The hated voice spoke calmly into her ear as she rocked Torrin gently. _

"_Don't move," Rodney whispered to her. "Ronon and Sheppard are tracking him. They'll get him. Just stay here." _

"_Rodney, you delivered Torrin," Teyla began, putting her son into the crib. "You caught him when you didn't think you could." _

"_Yes? And?" Rodney's eyes were panicked. "I did what I had to do. Ronon would have killed me if I'd let anything happen to either of you. Besides." He shrugged, keeping watch on the door as if Michael himself would come bursting through it. "You needed me." _

"_I need you now also." Teyla faced him. "I trust you to keep Torrin safe." _

"_You're leaving?" Rodney turned ashen. "You're leaving me alone with him?" _

"_You have the others to stand with you," Teyla told him reassuringly, even though her heart was beating fast enough to burst out of her chest. "Rodney, I have to do this. I have to protect my son." _

_She kissed the child and went out of the door with one last look behind her Rodney blinked at the sleeping child. "Ok little man. It's just you and me seeing as how Mommy wanted to go be all Xena on me." _

"You left Torrin with Rodney?" Laura was flabbergasted. "And Rodney was ok with that?"

"I did," Teyla confirmed with a small smile. "He almost died trying to protect him. But Michael and his soldiers were too strong. They overpowered the guards at the lab and rendered Rodney unconscious." She shuddered at the memory.

_"Give the baby over and we won't kill you." John's voice was lethal, his eyes hard as flint. His p-90 was pointed at Michael, as was Lorne's. Ronon hovered nearby, his eyes hot with anger. Teyla seemed rooted to the spot, her eyes huge as she stared at her son in Michael's arms._

_"He is mine," Michael said smoothly. "To with what I will." HE pressed a button on the remote control he carried and the gate began to dial of its own accord. _

"_You won't get through the gate," John warned. "Just do the right thing and give him back to Teyla." _

_Michael smiled thinly. "She is welcome to accompany me. And my son." _

_Teyla's head snapped up. "Your son?" _

_Michael's smile grew wider. "I have…adopted him. As of now, he is my son." _

_Teyla lunged, but Kanaan was faster. He leapt forward and in one swift move he wrenched Torrin free of Michael's hold and tossed him at Teyla, who lunged to catch the blanketed bundle before it hit the ground. _

_The gate was still spinning. "Kanaan!" Teyla's voice rang through the room as the event horizon activated and Kanaan gave her one look before sending himself and Michael careening into the mist spewing out of the stargate. _

"_No!" _

"He sacrificed himself to save Torrin," Laura said in wonder. "Teyla…"

Teyla wiped at the tear in her eyes. "The point, Laura, is that when Torrin was so close to being taken, I froze. I couldn't move."

"But you caught him," Laura reminded her friend gently. "When Kanaan tossed him at you, you caught him."

Teyla gave her a watery smile. "Exactly."

"Teyla." John's voice was void of emotion, but his eyes were bright as he gazed at his wife.

"Yes?"

"Jennifer says to let someone else in now. Can you get Lieutenant Cadman here some clothes?"

"Certainly," Teyla said smoothly. "I will get you something more comfortable."

"What could be more comfortable than panamas," Jennifer joked, coming into the cubicle. "Laura, we're going to move her into another wing, ok? Just to make it easier for you. "

"To what?"

"You may be here for a while, "Jennifer told her. "Cara has a nasty infection and I don't want her exposed to any more germs than she has to be."

"That's fine." Laura watched as Jennifer signalled to two nurses and they wheeled Cara into a small room off the main infirmary.

* * *

"How's she doing, Major?"

Lorne hopped to his feet as Sam and John approached Cara's room. Laura was inside changing into the clothes Teyla had procured for her.

"Ma'am, sir." He looked at John, who nodded. "She's not doing so great. The fever seems to be climbing."

"Crap," Sam said quietly. "That's bad."

"Yes Ma'am, it is."

"Major, please." Sam looked him directly in the eye. "Off duty privileges, remember?"

"Sorry." Lorne shifted uncomfortably, unable to bring himself to turn his back on years of military training and not call his CO sir or Ma'am. "Did you want me somewhere?"

"Right where you are for now," Sam told him. "Laura may need someone if this runs on long term."

Lorne repressed a shudder at the thought. Laura was worn out. She'd been sitting by Cara's side for the last five hours, refusing to leave or even eat something. Sam excused herself to take a call on her radio with an aoloogetic smile.

"Want me to get you something to eat?" John asked him, settling into the chair beside him. "It could be a long day."

"Not right now," Lorne answered. "But thanks."

"How're you holding up?" John crossed his legs at the ankle and relaxed into the chair. He looked at Lorne. His XO's usually calm demeanour was cracking a little, he thought. The dark brown hair was messy and dark circles ringed his blue eyes. "Lorne?"

"She's not my daughter," Lorne answered shortly.

"No," John said easily. "But she's important to you. They both are." It wasn't a question.

"They are," Lorne admitted, looking at his hands. "But I'm not going to do anything about it."

"Major," John began. "Did I tell you about the time I fell for Teyla?"

Lorne's jaw dropped. This was the first time he'd ever heard his CO talk like that. "No, sir."

John smiled slowly. "It was at Torrin's birthday party. The first one he had, remember it?"

"Yes, sir," Lorne replied with a grin. "Rodney and Torrin went head to head for the cake!"

"She was so sad," John recalled. "Like she was missing a piece of her."

_"Blow out the candle," Jennifer ordered the grinning baby, who waved fat hands at her and gurgled happily at the chocolate frosted cake in front of him. "Come on, Torrin. Blow out the candle."_

"_He's a year old," Rodney told her in disgust. "He doesn't know how to blow anything!" _

_Everyone fell silent, then burst out laughing. Rodney turned the same shade as the strawberries sitting in a bowl on the table. _

_Teyla solved the problem by leaning forward and blowing out the single candle. She smiled at them, but it didn't reach her amber eyes. "Smile," she said to Torrirn, who grinned obligingly at her, showing off eight teeth. _

_John thought that perfection really was right here in the mess hall, getting cake all over his fingers and mouth. Teyla was watching him, her eyes unbearably sad. It tore at him to see her like that. _

"How did you know when she was ready?" Lorne wanted to know. "How did you know when to…?"

"Make a move?" John quipped, relenting when he saw the misery in Lorne's eyes. "Look, Evan, it's not an exact science. Cadman loved Carson a lot. She was going to marry him."

"I know," Lorne sighed. "And I don't want to replace him. Hell, I don't know what I want. I shouldn't even be talking about this when Cara's so sick."

"Lorne, it's not a crime to have feelings," John told her. "When Torrin was two, Teyla finally lost that look."

"That look?"

"You know, the one that makes you want to travel back and change the past if it'll make her smile." John looked sympathetically at Lorne. "That look. It was when we started getting serious. And it happened, as I recall, right after Torrin recovered from that damn Kirsan fever that almost killed him."

_"How's he doing?" John asked Teyla, meeting her on the balcony nearest the infirmary where Torrin was quarantined. "Is he getting better?" _

_"He is doing very well," Teyla assured him with a smile. "Demanding to be allowed to walk around. Raising hell, Rodney says." _

_"He's well able to do that," John teased. He stopped when he saw her tears. "Teyla, I'm sorry." _

_"I was so afraid," Teyla said brokenly. "I thought that I would lose him too, and that I would truly be alone." _

_JOhn couldn't, he simply couldn't prevent himself from reaching out and drawing her into his arms. Just as he couldn't help but think how right she felt there. "You're not alone." _

_"But he's all I have left of Kanaan." _

_"But you're still not alone, Teyla. You have friends here in Atlantis. You have a family." You have me, he wanted to say, but couldn't. _

_"You are right," Teyla said, wiping at her eyes. "I'm sorry, John. I don't know what came over me." _

_"You just needed someone to take it for a sec," John told her gently, wiping a stray tear away with his thumb. "That's all." _

_She was looking up at him, those amber eyes full of tears and something inside him snapped. He leaned down and kissed her. _

"I knew then," John said, pulling himself back to the present moment. "I guess I'd always known. But she lost that look then."

"Oh yeah. That look." Lorne blew out a frustrated breath. "I'm sorry, sir. I shouldn't be-"

"Lorne, do I need to remind you of the last conversation we had in this room?"

"No, sir."

"Then stop calling me sir. I have a damn name, you know." John got to his feet. "Use it. Just don't tell the other majors on the base. It's not really military policy, but out here, who cares."

Lorne watched his CO stride away and shook his head. He was about to turn and go into Cara's room when the door opened and Laura burst out. The stark terror on her face rooted him to the ground.

"Jennifer?" Her voice was tinged with hysteria. "Jennifer!"

Footsteps sounded and Jennifer came running towards her, pulling her stethoscope out of her pocket. Ronon was following behind her. "What happened?"

"She started shaking. I think she's having a fit." Laura pointed to where Cara was tossing fitfully on the bed, her face flushed with fever. "Jen, please do something for her."

Lorne reached out and gripped her hand in his without thinking. "Let her work."

Cara reared up in the bed, her mouth opening in a scream. "Mama! No! Mama!"

"It's ok, sweetheart," Jennifer struggled to hold onto the child, calling for some assistance. "Load that hypo with those sedatives, would you?"

"Got it, Doctor." The scrub nurse handed her a hypo and she inserted it swiftly into the IV. "Anything else?"

"That should do it for now," Jennifer said evenly, watching as Cara relaxed again. "She's stabilised."

"What happened?" Laura was white. "What happened to her?"  
"A reaction to the infection." Jennifer took her arm to lead her outside. "Laura, come on. Evan will stay with her. "

Laura followed Jennifer outside the room. "What can I do for her?"

"Her fever is high," Jennifer said gently. "Laura, if we don't get that temp down soon, she's going to be very seriously sick."

"What can I do?" Laura stood up straighter, drawing on every ounce of self-control she possessed. "Tell me and I'll do it."

* * *

Ronon and Teyla stood outside the isolation room, watching as two nurses carried in a huge container. Two more came after them, carrying large tanks of water.

"What are they doing?" Ronon asked.

"Attempting to lower Cara's temperature, I believe." Teyla rubbed at her back and winced.

"You ok?" Ronon looked at her, concern knotting his brows together. "You need a chair?"

Teyla shook her head. "It's just a twinge in my back. I do not need to sit down."

"Teyla, are you sure you don't need to sit?" Ronon looked worried. "Why don't I have Jennifer have a look at you?"

"It is not necessary," Teyla insisted. "I am fine."

"What's not necessary?" Rodney asked, joining them at the door. He was carrying a tray of food.

"Teyla has a pain in her back," Ronon stated, ignoring the murderous glare Teyla sent his way.

"She's got what?" Rodney almost bobbled the tray in his haste to step backward. "Oh God, you're in labour aren't you?" The look on his face was comical. "Call Sheppard. He can catch this one!"

"I am not –"

"You're in labour?" John stood behind her. "Oh God. Labour. Right. I need to call…"

"I am not in labour!" Teyla almost shouted. "Stop fussing, all of you!"

"Mama, why are you hollering?" Torrin demanded, appearing in the doorway. "Why is your face red? Where's Cara? Is it true she's sick?"

"He hears everything," John muttered at her. "He followed me here and I swear my ears are on fire from the million questions he's thrown at me."

"Torrin, you cannot be here," Teyla said quietly, looking at her son. "Cara is sick, but Jennifer is doing everything she can for her. I promise you that as soon as she wakes up, you can go and visit her. Now go back with Sarah. She'll get you ready for dinner."

Torrin sensed that his parents were busy and obediently went with the marine John signalled to. He waved cheerfully at his mother as he trotted along, bombarding the poor man with questions.

"Are you ok?" John demanded, turning to his wife. "Teyla, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Teyla blinked back the tears that swam in her eyes. "I am tired. That is all."

"Ok, that's it," John took her arm firmly. "You're coming with me. No arguing!" He muscled her towards the other room and shut the door. "Talk to me."

"I am fine," Teyla told him firmly, refusing to meet his eyes. "John, please. Laura may need me."

"Lorne is there," John told her, rolling down the blinds and turning back to face her. "You and me, we need to talk about this."

"About what?" Teyla asked calmly.

"About what's bothering you enough to keep you awake at night." He almost smiled at the shock on her face. "Teyla, we sleep in the same bed. Do you not think I know when you can't sleep? You can't seriously need to pee that often!"

Tears filled her eyes. "I do," she admitted in a soft voice. "I actually do. Not as often as I did with Torrin."

"Thank God I wasn't around then," John joked. "I wouldn't have slept a wink – Teyla?" He saw the tears pouring down her face and everything inside him twisted. "Baby, what is it?"

She shook her head and held up her hands to ward him off. It didn't matter, though. He simply engulfed her in his arms, forcing her to lean on him. "Talk to me," he murmured softly. "Tell me."

"I am afraid," she admitted, her voice muffled against his chest.

"Of having the baby?"

"No, of course not." She drew back, tears still clinging to her lashes. "I am afraid that when this one arrives, you won't love Torrin and I like you used to."

John looked at her as if he was seeing her for the first time. "Let me get this straight." He spoke slowly and carefully. "You think that because you're having my baby that I won't love Torrin – or you – the same way. Have I got that right?"

Teyla nodded miserably. "Yes."

"Right. " John didn't release his hold on her. He merely tipped her head back and pressed his lips to hers gently, drawing out the kiss until she relaxed against him. When she sighed softly, he pressed his lips to her hair. "Now, listen to me."

"John, I – "

"No," he said, tightening his arms around her. "Listen. When you gave birth to Torrin on that wraith hive, when you gave him to me to hold while I put the rest of you in storage, I took him. I held onto him. And I loved him. I couldn't help it."

Teyla nodded against his chest. "I trusted you to keep him safe."

"Do you remember when I asked you to marry me? What I said?"

She smiled. "You said that you loved me. And that you wanted every part of me. Including Torrin. You wanted to be his father because he is part of me."

"I did. And I meant it." He released her to look down into her eyes. "I meant it then, and I mean it now. Teyla, you and Torrin are my life. This baby, our baby, is a new part of the life we already have. Dammit, why are you still crying?"

"Because, "Teyla replied, leaning against him again. "I love you. Even when you don't want to say what you should."

He shrugged. "Sometimes I can surprise people." He eyed her again. "Teyla, don't keep things from me. It's ok to be afraid. You're not invincible. It's ok to lean on other people." He kissed her again. "Just lean on me a little while, ok?"

"Ok."

* * *

"Is this going to work?" Laura fretted, watching anxiously as Jennifer tested the water in the tub with her elbow. "I mean, won't she go into shock?"

"It's necessary, " Jennifer told her, struggling not to look at the distraught woman in front of her as her friend, but rather as another patient. "I'm sorry, Laura. She's not going to like it, but it's necessary."

Cara was tossing again, muttering about monkeys and space horses in her delirium. Laura was terrified. Lorne was bordering on terrified himself at this stage. Cara's temperature was still soaring, and Jennifer was at her wits end.

"What do you need us to do?" He addressed Jennifer, who looked at him seriously.

"Stay outside."

"You are joking, aren't you?" Laura demanded. "Outside? Where Cara _isn't_?" Her voice rose shrilly. "I'm not leaving her."

"I'm her doctor," Jennifer said sternly, even though she wanted to cry herself at the panic on Laura's face. "I'm telling you to wait outside until I say it's ok to come in." She eyed Lorne. "Evan, please take her outside."

Lorne placed a hand on Laura's shoulder. "Laura, come on." She shook it off. "Lieutenant." He tried another angle and prayed she wouldn't hate him afterward. "I'm telling you, wait outside."

"Don't even try it," Laura warned, seething with fury and fear and worry. "Just don't. _Sir_."

"Outside!" Jennifer snapped. "Right now. Or I'll have the marines lock you in holding."

Laura stared at her. "You wouldn't."

"Cara is my priority," Jennifer stated, forcing herself to meet Laura's eyes. "I'll do what I have to."

Something inside Laura seemed to crumble, and she nodded once. Kissing Cara's hot cheek carefully, she went outside to where Ronon and Rodney were watching through the window.

"How's she doing?" Ronon asked gruffly, noting the pallor of Laura's cheeks and the dark circles under her eyes.

Lorne shook his head at him. Rodney merely continued to watch as Jennifer lifted Cara from the bed and went to the tub.

"Is she going to stick her in there?" Rodney looked at Laura for confirmation. "Really?"

Jennifer slowly lowered Cara into the water, grimacing as the little girl began to thrash around. The sound of her pitiful cries filtered through the closed door, making Rodney curse softly and pace the floor.

"Mama! Where are you, Mama?"

Laura stood still as stone, her gaze transfixed on the door. She was quivering, her body shaking visibly.

"Mama!" Cara's cries became louder.

"This sucks," Rodney said forcefully. "Can't she do something?"

"Hurts! Mama, it hurts! It's cold, Mama, make her stop."

Laura headed straight towards the door. Ronon stood up to block her path. "Not a good idea."

"Get out of my way." The words were quiet, but deadly. "Now."

"You're not going in there," Ronon said, folding his arms. "Jen said so."

"Please," Laura whispered as Cara's voice rose to a scream. "Please."

"Let her in," Lorne ordered. "Ronon, let her in. I'll take the fall. Just let her in there."

"Mama! MAMA!"

Laura darted under Ronon's arm and into the room. "I'm here, sweetie, Mama's right here."

"Get her out of here," Jennifer ordered, struggling to keep Cara in the tub as her legs and arms flailed about, splashing everyone with the cold water. "Easy, sweetheart, almost done."

"Noooo," Cara wailed. "Mama, where are you. She's hurting me, Mama!"

"I'm here." Laura fought back tears. She pulled off her sweater and kicked off her shoes. "Ok, here we go." She took a breath and before Jennifer could open her mouth to protest, she was climbing into the tub. She inhaled sharply at the cold and reached for her daughter. "Trust me, Jen. I know what I'm doing."

"What are you doing?" Lorne demanded. "You'll get hypothermia!"

Cara continued to thrash around and cry out, her little body arching upwards. Laura wrapped both arms around her and began to sing softly into her ear, ignoring the cold water lapping around her as she drew up her knees. "Baby mine, don't you cry…"

Jennifer watched in awe as Cara's cries quieted and she relaxed against Laura, her breathing evening out.

"Rest your head close to my heart…" Laura caught Jennifer's eye and continued to rock and sing to her little girl.

"Will it work?" Lorne whispered to Jennifer, watching as Laura soothed the feverish child. "Will it take her temperature down?"

"I don't know," Jennifer whispered back. "We'll have to wait and see."

Laura crooned nonsense into Cara's ear for what seemed like hours. Her feet and hands were numb with the cold, but she didn't care. If it worked, she'd warm up later.

"Laura?" Jennifer stood at her side. "I need to check on her."

Wordlessly, Laura nodded. She let go of her daughter and Jennifer whisked her over to the bed. Her teeth chattered violently and she began to shiver.

"Let's get you out of there," Lorne said, signalling to Ronon, who still hadn't left. "Ronon?"

The big Satedan strode forward and lifted Laura effortlessly out of the tub, setting her down in a dripping heap on the floor before tossing Lorne a blanket. He strode out of the room again, appearing a moment later with a pair of scrubs. He handed them to Laura, who took them gratefully.

Jennifer turned to them with a broad smile. "Fever's coming down!"

Laura's knees buckled and she stumbled forward, almost falling. Arms shot around her and she found herself pulled upright against Lorne, who was grinning at her.

"Thank you," she whispered to Jennifer, who reached out and hugged her, oblivious to the wet shirt and sweatpants still dripping water on the floor.

* * *

"How's the patient?" Lorne stuck his head in the door and smiled at Laura when she looked up at him.

"Sleeping," she whispered, beckoning him inside. "She's been sleeping for…" She looked at her watch. "Six hours now."

"Wow." Lorne was impressed. "That's good, right?"

"It's better," Laura said softly. "Her temperature is down, so the antibiotics have a chance to work now. We just have to wait and see."

"How are you doing?" Lorne studied her carefully. He seemed to spend a lot of his time looking at her lately, he thought with a rueful smile. Not that it was a hardship. "You ok?"

She stretched, yawned. "I'm tired. Stiff. Shoulder hurts like a bi – like a…a lot," she finished, looking at Cara.

Lorne's lips twitched. "I doubt she can hear you."

Laura laughed. "She has an ability to pick up bad language. She hid in the gym at SGC once about a year ago."

"Really?" Lorne loved to hear her talk about Cara. Her face softened and her eyes glowed and she seemed to light up from the inside.

"Really. She came back to me and I was scolding her for wandering around the base. General Landry is fond of her, but I doubt he would appreciate it if she wrecked the place. Anyway, Colonel Mitchell brought her back, and she laughed at me." She looked over at him. "She said, and I quote, 'God dammit Mama, training's a bitch on the hips!'"

Lorne burst out laughing. "Oh dear. I'm guessing Colonel Mitchell got hell for that one."

Laura nodded. "You bet. Thank God General Landry backed me up. He threatened to throw Colonel Mitchell's ass in holding if he didn't watch his mouth."

"Come on," Lorne said suddenly, noticing her shift uncomfortably on her seat. "Let's get some air."

Laura hesitated, looking down at Cara.

"She's sleeping," Lorne coaxed, holding out a hand. "And it's late. Most of the city is asleep. We'll take a stroll, get you some air and then I'll help you pull the spare bed in so you can stay here."

Laura looked gratefully at him. "Thank you."

He led her to the nearest balcony, opening the door and watching as she closed her eyes and breathed in the sea air. "Better?"

"Oh yeah. Much. Thank you." She opened her eyes to find him standing beside her, watching her with those blue eyes of his. The look in them was both familiar and alien all at the same time. She didn't know how to interpret it, or why it was making her stomach flutter. She just knew that it was.

Lorne cleared his throat, the thought of kissing her way too prevalent in his mind. _Get a grip, Evan_, he scolded himself._ She's_ _had the day from hell and you want to jump her. God._

"We should get back." His voice was gruff.

She laid a hand on his arm. "Evan?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For calling on you. I didn't mean to, it was just that I panicked and I couldn't lift her and God, I was so scared. I didn't know who else to call."

"Laura." He touched her face gently, allowing himself that one step. "I don't mind. I'm glad you did."

"Really?"

"Really. You're allowed to lean on people, you know. You don't have to be independent all the time." He kept his eyes on hers as he spoke, watching the tears fill them. "It's ok to let people help sometimes."

"I've forgotten how," she whispered. The tears fell faster than she could wipe them away.

"It's easy," he told her with a smile. "You just hold on to someone else instead of trying to be an island. "

When her shoulders slumped, he thought she was angry with him. It took him a moment to realise that she was sobbing silently. "Laura?"

"I'm ok," she sobbed. "Need a minute. Just a minute."

"No," he told her. "You don't. Come here." He reached out and gently held her. "Hold on to me. The world won't fall if you do."

Her fists seemed to rise up of their own accord and clutch the front of his t-shirt as she cried. She burrowed into him and sobbed as if her heart would break. When her sobs quieted to hiccups and her breath shuddered out of her in little bursts, she looked up at him. "You're always saving me."

"Someone has to," he said, almost sadly. "You just need to let them."

She tipped her head so that it was resting against his chest. "It's not so hard all the time," she admitted. "But sometimes it gets really hard and I don't know who to talk to or even where to start if someone would listen."

"How about you start with just leaning on me a little," Lorne suggested, tightening his arm around her. "That'll do for now."

* * *

When they came back to the infirmary, Laura looked up at Lorne. "Tomorrow, I have to go back to calling you Sir."

He nodded. "We'll be on the clock."

"Then for right now, I'll say thank you." She took his hand in hers. "Thank you, Evan. I couldn't have gotten through today without you."

"You're welcome."

Laura gathered all her courage and stood on her tiptoes to place a gentle kiss on his lips. "Thank you."

He was left speechless and reeling as she went back into the room. "Damn," was all he could say.

"Damn is right," Jennifer said from behind him. She was grinning. "Ev, you're toast!"

**Wow, that was a pretty long one, but there was loads I wanted to say and once I started I wasn't able to stop! Apologies for that! Hope ye liked it and please let me know either way! It could be a few days before I get the next up so this long one should keep ye all until then. I'm sorry if ye fall asleep in the middle of it!**


	9. We've Got Time

**I can't thank you guys enough for what you've done for my confidence (",) so I'm posting another chap now to say thanks! I'm glad I didn't test anyone's patience with the last one. Sometimes long chapters can be boring. If ye don't hear from me for a few days, it's because my sister is leaving for a year and we're all in a state of depression! She's one of my three younger sisters and I'm going to miss her like crazy. **

**Anyway, my dvd boxset arrived hip hooray. I've spent the last three nights staying up far too late while drooling over John and Evan. I have no life really! As usual, all spoilers are appreciated for S5, I can only watch it on That Place That Shall Remain Nameless. **

**Oh yeah, and there'll be a nice surprise in this chapter (",)**

**Asugar: The Shep/Teyla scenes were just for you. And I'm trying to hate Kanaan but I can't. From what I've seen, he's a nice guy who loves his son and isn't sure how he feels about Teyla. Poor John, though it must totally suck for him. I think that Jen has come a long way from when she was a weakling in Missing. Teyla was great in that ep though. Lorne is a sweetie, you're right there and so good with Cara. I think it's very important for Laura to make a move on this one and to set the pace. I don't know why I feel like that, I just do! More on Mit****chell and the rest of SG1 soon too, I love SG!**

**Kryan810: I made you cry? Seriously? Sorry, didn't aim for that but wow! I have the power – go me!! **

**RowenaR: Sorry about that, but I couldn't stop it-it seemed to just come from my brain straight to my laptop! I like little details myself, they're vital to me. So expect more things like that. He's such a good guy, he won't rush her but I have the feeling he's going to get impatient soon! **

**Brodieresa: I heard that song on Alison Krauss's cd. She does a lovely version of it. I can't watch Beaches – I cry like a baby every time so I just don't anymore! Great soundtrack though. **

**Bailey1ak: I liked that part too. Took courage on her part though. Think she's coming back to life a little. Woohoo! Fun to follow stay tuned. **

**Sachita: Congrats on passing your driving test well done that's great. He was a little shell shocked alright, but that's to be expected. He'll be fine not to worry. Hope your enjoying the sun over there! **

**Andromeda: Yep, toast he is for sure! It's going to be great fun watching him get tangled up in knots. **

**John's Puddle Jumper: Glad you keep coming back, shows me I'm doing something right! They're going to be thrown together soon, watch this space! **

**Tripwatcher2: I'm a fan of the John/Teyla ship. Lots more to come from that one, let me tell you. There's a baby and all to be delivered yet! **

**Trecebo: Thank you for the compliment. And I'm glad I hooked you in! He's a goner, and it's going to be fun to watch things heat up! **

**Chapter 9. We've Got Time. **

"Have you heard?" Jennifer stuck her head around the door of Cara's room and clapped a hand to her mouth when Lorne held up a warning finger. "Sorry," she added in a whisper. "But have you heard?"

"Heard what?" Lorne whispered back, motioning for her to follow him outside of the room.

Jennifer peeked back in the window with a fond smile at the sight of Laura and Cara curled up together on the narrow infirmary bed, fast asleep. Cara's head was resting on her mother's shoulder and Laura had her arm tucked securely around her daughter. "That's a sweet sight."

"Sure is," Lorne agreed. He gave her a pointed glare. "Don't start, Jen. What's the news?"

"General O'Neill and a team from the SGC are coming out for a visit," Jennifer said excitedly. "It's been ages since anyone from home came out. The Odyssey and the Daedalus are both coming too."

"What's the big occasion?" Lorne wanted to know.  
"I have no idea, but we'll find out in a week," Jennifer retorted. "Now, back to you." She gave him an evil grin. "What's been going on, Ev. You haven't left this place outside of essential trips for almost a week now."

"You," Lorne said, pointing at her, "are evil. Does your fiancé know how evil you are?"

"I do," Ronon's gravely voice said calmly. "Part of her charm. Does Cadman know you think she's hot?"

Lorne choked. "I'm leaving. Tell her when she wakes up that I'll sit with Cara for a while so she can get some down time." He nodded to Ronon, gave Jennifer another mock glare and exited the room, whistling to himself cheerfully.

--

"What's the deal with the visit from the powers back home?" Rodney demanded, strolling into Sam's office and plonking himself into the chair in front of her.

Sam blinked. "Sorry?"

"The visit? From General O'Neill and who we presume will be Woolsey and the other members of the rat squad." Rodney snapped his fingers at Sam's face. "Keep up, Sam!"

Sam folded her hands together and ordered herself to be calm and relaxed despite her sweating palms. Jack was coming here? To Atlantis? Why hadn't General Landry told her _that_ part? What if he was coming to tell her that he was relieving her of her command and sending her back to Earth? "When did you hear that?"

Rodney looked impatiently at her. "Sam, the entire city knows by now. You know that they only visit here when there is pending doom now that we can gate back and forth. What's the story?"

"You know I can't tell you," Sam stated calmly. "So don't even try. Now." She moved the papers around on her desk. "Where are we on the trade talks with the people on…" she shuffled through her files. "…P09-523."

"Major Lorne's team are heading back there today at 15.00," Rodney told her with a resigned sigh. "Norin, the leader, thinks that he may be able to allow us to examine the materials here if we give him a certain amount of our c-4 and some more of our Marines to help them harvest their next crop. And for Keller to vaccinate them against Kirsan fever."

Sam frowned. "That's all? That's everything they want?"

"They live like the Ingalls family," Rodney scoffed. "All they want is their health and then their wealth, so to speak." He rolled his eyes at Sam's questioning look. "All they need is their crops and all that kind of thing. They don't want technology. So." He looked immensely pleased with himself. "A good solution all around, I'd say."

"Too good," Sam mused. "There must be a catch. Find the catch, Rodney."

The scientist looked crestfallen. "The catch?"

Sam got to her feet as her radio buzzed. "Go ahead. Find the catch," she ordered as she left the room.

"Find the catch," Rodney muttered to himself. "Hah!"

"Uncle Rodney, why are you talking to yourself?" Torrin popped up from behind a large plant. "Are you going insane like Papa said you would?"

"No," Rodney retorted with a mutinous glare. "I'm not. And why do you call him Papa? Can't you say Daddy?"

Torrin glared right back. "It's to tell the difference between him and Daddy who died."

"Daddy who…oh." Understanding dawned and with it a little stab of shame. "Well. Very clever of you. Yes. Clever."

"I'm extremely bright," Torrin informed him loftily. "Everyone says so."

Rodney could only goggle at him. "You hear far too much, you know that?"

"Little pitchers have big ears," Torrin recited gleefully. "What's a pitcher? I thought it was what Papa hangs on the wall of the man in the black coat."

"A pitcher is a large or small container, used to hold liquid." Rodney stopped and sighed when he saw Torrin look blankly at him. "It's like a jug."

"A jug?" Torrin frowned. "I thought only ladies had jugs. I heard Major Allen saying that Dr Forrest in the astrology lab had great big ju-"

"Ok!" Rodney cut him off immediately. "How about we never tell your mother that. Or your father for that matter."

"Tell me what?" John asked, hoisting a giggling Torrin into the air and turning to face Rodney.

"About Dr Forrest's jugs," Torrin supplied helpfully.

Rodney promptly began to choke. "I never said anything about Dr Forrest's jugs?"

"Rodney!" Teyla scolded, smacking him on the arm as she came into the office just in time to hear his last sentence. "Please don't speak like that in front of Torrin!"

"I didn't!" Rodney protested hotly, throwing the now innocent looking Torrin a murderous glare. "Why aren't you in the nursery?"

"It's for babies," Torrin told them with a dramatic sigh, making his mother chuckle. "Mama, I'm grown up now. And anyway, it's boring without Cara."

"You can go visit her later," John told him, settling into the nearest chair with Torrin on his knee. "Now, where's the boss?"

"Right here," Sam called out from the bridge. "I'll be there in a minute!"

"Wonderful." Teyla eased herself up off the chair. "I need to use the ladies room."

"Mama?"

"In a moment, Torrin."

"But Mama, you-"

"Torrin, leave your mother alone," John chastised the squirming child. "She's only going to the bathroom."

"But Mama, your dress is wet!" Torrin cried out. "Look at it!"

Teyla looked down, puzzled. "I don't remember spilling anything on it."

Rodney turned pale, then green. "Oh God, she's in labour." He leapt up from his chair. "I'm not catching it this time. I'm just not!"

"I am not experiencing any contractions." Teyla was puzzled. "I don't feel any – oh." Her eyes widened. "Oh."

The second 'oh' had John leaping to his feet. "Teyla?"

"It would appear that Rodney is correct," she smiled serenely. "I am in labour."

John's face whitened. "Oh God. Ok, stay calm, Rodney."

"I'm not catching it!"

"Nobody's asking you to catch it!" John's voice was tinged with hysteria. "I'll catch it! Just stay calm."

"Why?" Ronon asked, coming in to join them. Jennifer was hurrying after them, followed by Lorne, who was geared up and ready to go offworld.

"Sorry we're late," Jennifer said breathlessly. "I was just giving Cara her antibiotics. She's doing so much better thank God. John? You ok?"

John was still staring at Teyla, a look of pure panic on his face. "She's in labour."

"She's what?" Ronon stared at Teyla, who was still smiling. "Why is she smiling?"

"Because it doesn't hurt," Rodney told them. He was backing away from Teyla rapidly. " But it will. Oh yes sir! She's going to start screaming and then I'll have to catch it!"

"I am feeling quite well," Teyla said calmly. She took Torrin's hand when he went to her side. "I have no pain as yet."

"How is that even possible?" Lorne wondered aloud. He caught his CO's eye. "Sorry sir, Is there anything you want me to do?"

"Have it for her," John said, not quite joking.

"Sorry sir, "Lorne grinned. "She's going to have to suffer through it herself."

"I can make it an order," John offered desperately, the thought of his wife in pain making him feel ill. "If you need it to be."

"John." Teyla stepped to his side. "Please remain calm. It would appear we are going to have a baby."

A look of wonder spread across his face, making his green eyes light up. "Wow."

"Ok," Sam clapped her hands. "Finally, I get all of you together and –what's happening?" She stopped in the doorway, confused. "Why is Torrin in the briefing?"

"I hid in the plant, Sam," Torrin announced. "And Mama is having her baby."

Sam's eyes lit up. "Now? Here? Great!" Her face fell suddenly. "Oh no."

"What?" John demanded, pacing furiously. "What?"

"I'm going to lose the betting pool," Sam said darkly. "I had her holding out for another week. Damn it."

John gaped at her. "There was a betting pool?"

"Please," Rodney snorted. "Like you weren't in on it! After all, who knew better than you when she'd go into labour!"

"How do you know when Mama's having the baby?" Torrin, who had been watching the exchange with interest, turned to his father.

John turned bright red. "I know her the best," he told his unsuspecting son amid a chorus of laughter.

"I'd like to get you to the infirmary," Jennifer said to Teyla, who nodded, still calm and serene. "Just to have a look and make sure you're not in any danger of delivering in the corridors."

"Oh God," Rodney moaned, dropping his head into his hands. "I think I'm going to be sick!"

* * *

"Hey Cara!" Torrin bounded into Cara's room ahead of Lorne, almost bursting with excitement. "Guess what! Hi, Laura."

His parents had long ago given up trying to make Torrin address his elders by their proper titles. He'd simply called them by either name or surname since he could form the words. Nobody on the base minded. He'd owned them all since the day he was born and they all freely admitted it. Even the toughest of Marines had been known to crack a smile at the boy.

"What?" Cara brightened slightly at the sight of her friend.

"Mama's having a baby!"

Laura perked up immediately. "She is? Now? That's great!" She looked at Lorne for confirmation. "I thought you were going offworld."

"I was," he admitted. "But Colonel Sheppard is…needed elsewhere for now. I'm in charge, apparently. They're sending Grayson instead."

"How is Teyla?" Laura asked.

"She's great. No pain, according to herself. But that should change soon."

"Mama, did it hurt when I was born?" Cara snuggled up against her mother, thumb in her mouth.

"It didn't at first," Laura said, the words as familiar to her as her own name. She'd been telling Cara the story for years. "But then it did."

"Tell me again, "Cara begged. "Torrin doesn't know it."

Laura smiled and patted the space next to her on the bed. Torrin immediately snuggled into her other side, looking up at her with his mother's wide amber coloured eyes. "It was a sunny day, back home at the SGC," she began, looking over at Lorne, who nodded at her and dropped into the chair on the opposite side of the bed.

_"Laura! To what do we owe the pleasure?" Carolyn Lam looked up from stitching Vala MalDoran's hand and smiled at her. "How are you feeling?"_

"_Fat," Laura told her truthfully. "I was in the neighbourhood and I wanted to stop by and see how you're doing." _

"_You're on maternity leave, Cadman," Cameron Mitchell pointed out. "Why are you here?" _

"_Cam!" Carolyn scolded. "Leave her alone!" She swatted him away when he grinned and leaned in towards her. "Stop that! Be a gentleman and get Laura a chair, would you!" _

_Laura dropped gratefully into the chair Cam fetched for her and looked curiously at Vala. "What happened to your hand?"_

"_Shootout on PX9-651," Vala told her, wincing as Carolyn slid a needle under her skin. "Ow." _

_Daniel was holding tightly to her other hand, wincing in reaction. "Are you ok?" _

_Carolyn rolled her eyes. "Daniel, I'm giving her five stitches. Not the twelve I gave Tealc last weekend or the eighteen you needed after your last offworld visit. Man up!" _

"_I'm fine, Daniel," Vala assured him, leaning over to kiss his cheek. "Just dandy!" _

"_He's soft now that he's in love," Cam smirked. "It's making a girl out of him!" _

"_Shut up," Daniel said sweetly, "or I'll tell Carolyn here some of your finer moments. Including the ones where you lost your pants!" He had the pleasure of watching Cam's face turn bright red. _

"_I'd like to hear that," Carolyn put in, wrapping Vala's hand in a clean bandage. "All done. Keep it dry and see me in a few days to remove them." _

"_Thanks, Caro," Vala said gratefully, hopping off the gurney. "I need to get out of these clothes." She glanced down at her blood stained uniform. "Blood's a killer to get out of these pants." _

"_I need to get my reports up to date," Cam said, rising to his feet and winking at Carolyn. "I've got me a hot date tonight." _

_Laura rose when he did, her training overriding her pregnancy. She felt an odd sensation, like something popping, followed by a sensation like a bubble bursting. _

"_Lieutenant Cadman," Tealc said calmly. "You appear to be leaking fluid." _

_Laura looked down at her feet under the maternity dress she wore. "I do, don't I?" _

"_Laura," Carolyn said gently. "Are you in labour?" _

"_I don't think so," Laura said, mesmerized. "I don't feel any pain other than the one in my back. It's been there on and off all day and…oh." Understanding dawned. "Oh my God, I'm having a baby." _

_Cameron made a choking sound. "Right here?" He looked nauseous. "Carolyn, honey, can you deliver one here in the SGC?" His face was turning pale. "I'll call the president." _

"_The president?" Daniel asked, grinning. "I doubt he knows how to deliver a baby!" _

"_I believe your time has come to procreate, Lieutenant Cadman," Tealc stated. "I wish you luck." He bowed and left the room._

"_Cam, help Laura over to the bed there," Carolyn ordered. "I'm going to get supplies." _

_Cameron surveyed the grinning Laura. "Cadman, go to that bed." He pointed to where Carolyn had indicated. "Immediately." _

"_Yes sir," Laura said with a smile. It vanished as a pain lanced through her abdomen and she clutched his arm, hissing. "Sorry, sir. Liberties and all that. Damn, that hurt." _

"_Cam!" Carolyn exclaimed. "The bed! Get her on it!" _

_Cam's face was a mixture of fear and horror and helplessness that would have made Laura laugh under any other circumstances. He looked at her in desperation, and then inspiration struck. Before she could protest, he scooped her up in his arms and deposited her on the bed. _

_A crashing sound behind them made him swing around. Daniel was kneeling on the floor, holding a limp Vala in his arms. "She fainted." _

"Uncle Cam was terrified," Cara said to Torrin, who was awed by this story. "He almost fainted himself, but every time he tried to leave Aunt Carolyn would give him a job."

"That's right," Laura laughed. "And then when you were born, he grinned like an idiot."

"He said 'cool'" Cara reminded her mother. "And he fought with Vala over who got to hold me first!" Her smile was wide. "I was a very important person, wasn't I, Mama?"

"You surely were," Laura agreed. "And now it's very important that you be nice to Torrin and let him play your computer game while Teyla is having the baby."

"I'll be good, "Cara promised.

"You tell a mean story," Lorne teased as he followed her outside. "There's more to it, though, isn't there?"

"What do you mean?"

"You only tell her the funny parts," he said softly. "Like Vala fainting and Colonel Mitchell not knowing what to do with you and Tealc being Tealc."

"She loves them," Laura said simply. "She calls them her Earth family. And Cameron is her godfather. He idolises her."

"But what about the part where you were on your own?" Lorne persisted. "I'm sure Colonel Mitchell was a great Lamaze coach, but-"

"How do you know what Lamaze is?" Laura twisted her head around, her eyes wide.

"I have a sister," Lorne told her. "I was there when my nephew was born. I could probably be useful to the Colonel if he'd let me right now!"

"I was alone," Laura said quietly. "But it was all worth it when she was put in my arms.

_"Push, Laura, that's it. Good girl." Carolyn kept a steady stream of encouragement as Laura bore down and pushed hard. "Ok, easy, there's the head. Cameron!"_

"_Yes, ma'am?" _

"_Stop trying to sneak out. You don't want to be anywhere else when a miracle happens, do you?" _

"_No ma'am," Cam answered dutifully, taking his place at Laura's side and pointedly ignoring anything below her chin. _

"_Now, push, Laura, one more. Cam, help her sit up a little." _

"_Sorry, sir," Laura panted. "Not what you expected to be doing today is it?" _

_"Push, Lieutenant, that's an order," Cam teased. His teasing stopped when the sound of a baby crying filled the room. "Wow."_

_"Laura, meet your daughter," Carolyn announced, handing Laura the squirming bundle. "She's perfect."_

_Looking down into her daughter's eyes, Laura felt the tears flow down her cheeks. She'd never felt so fulfilled in her life. And she'd never felt so alone._

_"Well done, Cadman," Cam declared. "I trust you're going to call her Cameron, after me and Diaz?"_

_"Her name is Cara," Laura said softly. "Cara Cadman Beckett."_

Laura looked at Lorne, who was watching her, his expression unreadable. "I cried for weeks after she was born," she admitted. "I kept thinking of Carson, how he'd feel if he saw her, how he'd be with her. I missed him so badly it hurt to breathe."

"And now?" The words were out of his mouth before he thought about it.

"Now? I still miss him. I'll always miss him. But he would want me to be happy. Cara too." Laura's smile was unbearably sad. "He's not coming back, Evan. I mean Major." She flushed.

"Laura, I-" Lorne was interrupted by John rushing out of the other room, his hair standing straight up on his head.

"Doc! She's got a pain!"

Laura hurried towards the room. "Teyla?"

"Hello, Laura," Teyla greeted her. "How is Cara doing?" Her hands gripped the rail of the bed tightly, the only sign that she was anything other than her usual self.

"She's fine," Laura said cautiously. "How are you?"

"I am in a great deal of pain," Teyla told her, her breathing deep and harsh. "John is gone to fetch Jennifer. She will help."

"I'm here," John skidded to a halt in front of his wife. "Are you ok?"

"You were gone only a few moments," Teyla replied, beads of sweat appearing on her forehead. "I am fine."

"You're amazing," John whispered to her, kissing her forehead and slipping his arms around her.

Laura slipped out of the room, her throat aching. She bumped into Ronon, who was loitering around the corridor. "Ouch!"

"Sorry," Ronon apologised, steadying her gently. "How's she doing?"

"Pretty good, "Laura answered, rubbing her nose. "You should go in and see her. I think the Colonel could do with the distraction."

A low cry echoed from the room and Ronon paled. "I'll wait."

"What's gotten into him?" Jennifer demanded, watching as her fiancé all but ran out of the room. "Where's he going?"

"I told him to go and see Teyla," Laura confided with a wink. "He turned tail and ran!"

Jennifer began to laugh. "God help him when our children come along, because if he runs I'll kill him!"

"Doc!" John's voice rang out.

"Go on," Laura prodded her friend. "Let me know when we've got a baby!"

* * *

"One more," Jennifer told Teyla with an encouraging smile. "Just one more and we'll see the head."

"You're doing great," John assured his wife, who bared her teeth at him.

"It's your fault!"

"She wasn't like this with Torrin," John said in a whisper to Jennifer. "McKay said she was very calm and knew exactly what to do!"

"Rodney was not to blame for Torrin's existence," Teyla hissed. "This one is definitely your fault!"

"Just agree with her," Jennifer said in a sing song voice. "Or else call Rodney in here!"

John was too busy gaping to argue with her. "Is that the head?" He felt a little dizzy. "Wow."

"Ok, here we go," Jennifer announced. "Teyla, I need you to bear down and push. That's it, that's the way."

An indignant wail pierced the room and Teyla fell back onto her pillows with a guttural cry. John could only stare as Jennifer swiftly cut the cord and wrapped the baby in a blanket.

"John, Teyla, say hello to your daughter."

"A girl," John's eyes were wide as he accepted the blanketed bundle from Jennifer. "I have a daughter."

"You do," Teyla said softly, her eyes on her baby. "I know you would have liked a son."

"I _have_ a son," John corrected her, never taking his eyes from the baby in his arms. "And now I have a daughter too."

Teyla held her arms out for the baby, who chose that moment to open her eyes and look at her parents curiously. Her cries had stopped the moment John had taken her in his arms.

"Hello, little one," Teyla cooed. She turned glowing eyes to John, who leaned down and kissed her gently. "What will we call her?"

"Jennifer's a good name." Two pairs of eyes looked at her. "Sorry. Just thought I'd get that in there."

"How about after someone in your family," Teyla said. "Torrin is named for my father. What is your mother's name?"

"I need to take her to run some tests," Jennifer interrupted apologetically, "Sorry, guys. Routine. I'll have her back in twenty minutes, tops. Teyla, I'll send someone in to help you clean up and then you can have some visitors."

"Jennifer?" John stood up when the petite doctor took the baby in her arms. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

* * *

"She's little," Torrin breathed, enthralled by the baby in his mother's arms. "Mama, what's her name?"

"Your father is choosing," Teyla said gently. "What names do you like?"

"I like Kari," Torrin said immediately. "Like Lewis's little girl."

"She should have her own name," Ronon said to the boy. "It's better that way."

"Can we call her Spot?" Torrin asked, bewildered by the gales of laughter that greeted his suggestion. "It's what I'd have called a monkey!"

"Your sister is not a monkey," John scolded gently, tapping Torrin's nose. "She's a baby."

"She's an angel," Jennifer cooed from her position at the end of Teyla's bed.

"I agree." Teyla looked down at the baby in her arms, unable to believe that she was here. "She's perfect."

"Perfectly everything?" John asked, leaning down so only she could hear him.

"You guys make me sick," Rodney swept into the room, holding a box in his arms. "Congratulations, though."

"And you didn't even have to catch her," John pointed out with a lazy grin. "I managed that part this time." He ignored Teyla's unladylike snort.

"Well come on, let's have a look at her," Rodney demanded, holding out his arms. "Let Uncle Rodney see her."

"Drop her and I'll shoot you," John warned, taking his daughter from Teyla, who immediately reached out to wrap her arms around Torrin.

"I won't drop her," Rodney protested hotly. "Have you no faith in me?"

"You dropped me once," Torrin chimed in. "Papa told me so!"

Rodney threw John a look of utter disgust. "You told him that? How could you tell him that? Don't you have _any_ loyalty?" He stood up, the motion making the baby squirm and whimper.

"You're shaking her!" Jennifer admonished him sharply. "Give her here!"

"Fine," Rodney huffed, but his eyes softened as he looked down at the baby. "She's very pretty. I hope she looks like you, Teyla, not your husband."

Teyla smiled. "I think she will look like herself."

"Knock knock!" Laura tapped on the door and pushed it in, smiling at the sight of the baby in Jennifer's arms. "Oh, Teyla, she's gorgeous."

"Bring you back any?" John asked with a smile that disappeared the minute the words were out of his mouth. "Damn, I'm sorry, Cadman. I didn't mean to…you know."

"It's ok," Laura told him. "It does bring me back, actually. Reminds me of when Cara was this tiny." She was looking longingly at the baby. "What's her name?"

"We haven't decided," John said. "Teyla thinks that since Torrin is named for her dad, Baby Sheppard here should be named for my Mom."

"What's your mother's name?" Laura asked curiously, moving forward to make room for Lorne, who had entered the room with a grin on his face and a clap on the back for his CO.

John made a face. "It's Eliza."

Laura struggled to contain her laughter. "That's a nice name, sir. Eliza Sheppard." She looked at Lorne, who was turning red from the effort it took not to laugh.

"It's a nice name," John protested. "It just doesn't go with Sheppard."

"What was your mother's name?" Lorne asked a smiling Teyla.

"Tagan," she answered. "But I would prefer a name from John's family." She eyed her husband. "So pick one. We cannot keep calling her Baby."

"I've got one," Ronon said suddenly. "It's a good name. Strong."

"We are not calling her Ronon," John told him firmly, reaching out to test his daughter's tiny grip. His eyes lit up when the baby's fist curled around his fingers. "She knows me!"

"It's a reflex," Rodney scoffed. "Look." He went to grip her other hand.

Ronon cuffed him on the side of the head. "Shut up, McKay." He looked at Teyla. "I think you should call her something from Elizabeth."

"That is a lovely thought." Teyla smiled at the Satedan. "And a fitting tribute to a fine leader." She looked around at the crowded room. "What can we make from Elizabeth?"

"Beth?" Jennifer suggested, rubbing a finger over the downy black hair covering the baby's head.

"Nope," John shook his head. "I had a girlfriend called Beth once." He made a face. "She was a-" He looked at his son, thought better of it. "Not Beth."

"Lizzie!" Torrin asked, his face falling when his mother vetoed that idea.

"Daisy!" Rodney exclaimed triumphantly. "My grandmother was called Daisy."

"Why don't we just call her Meredith?" Lorne suggested mischievously. "After her Uncle Meredith!"

Laura swatted at him. "That's not nice! I've got one. How about Lily?"

"Lily," Teyla said slowly. "Lily Sheppard. I like it." She looked at John, eyebrows raised. "What do you think?"

"Lily Emmagan Sheppard," John corrected with a broad grin. "It's perfect!"

* * *

"Mama?" Cara looked up at her mother, who was tucking her into the infirmary bed. "When can I see the baby?"

"When Doctor Keller says you can get out of bed," Laura answered, kissing her forehead. "Go to sleep, Miss Beckett. You're getting out of here soon!"

She looked on as Cara snuggled into her blankets with her stuffed monkey for company. Lorne had fetched it for her when she'd been particularly fractious. She shuddered at the thought of how close she'd come to losing her daughter.

The first bath had brought the temperature down, but she'd had to repeat the process several more times that day and night to keep it down. Cara had cried pitifully throughout the whole ordeal, almost breaking Laura's heart. At one stage, Lorne, unable to listen to the child's protests any longer, had taken her hand and started to talk to her while Laura held on to her shaking body. For the next week, she'd been unable to sleep or even leave the room for longs spells, desperately afraid that she'd come back to find Cara's temperature up again.

"Knock knock," Lorne sang out, coming into the room.

"Evan!" Cara sat up in bed, forgetting her promise to sleep in her delight. She held her arms up to him, delighted when he tossed her over his shoulder.

"IV!" Laura squeaked, leaping forward as Cara scrambled to get down from Lorne's shoulder. "Honestly, it's like having two children!"

"Mama, why don't you have another baby like Teyla?" Cara turned innocent blue eyes to her mother. "Evan, would you like a baby?"

Lorne's jaw dropped. "What? Me?"

"Yes, Evan, "Laura teased. "Would you like a baby like Teyla?"

"Of course," Lorne said seriously. "Who wouldn't?"

It was Laura's turn to have her jaw drop. "Really?" She looked at him.

"I've got a great idea," Cara announced, bouncing up and down until Laura came to her other side to calm her down with a restraining hand. "Mama, why don't you make a baby?"

Laura turned red. "Sweetie, you need to sleep."

"That's an order," Lorne added, casting her a mock glare. "In your bed, Private!"

"Yes sir!" Cara saluted sharply, the way she'd seen her mother do. She snuggled down again. "Night Mama, night Evan."

"Good night," Laura answered. She waited until she was outside the door before leaning against the wall, exhausted. "God."

"Yeah," Lorne agreed, mirroring her position. "She's got quite an imagination."

"I thought I'd have years before I'd have to have that talk with her." Laura made a face. "Damn it, she's growing up way too fast."

"You need some sleep," Lorne commented, looking at her face. "You have suitcases under your eyes."

"Thanks," Laura said wryly. "You sure know how to make a girl feel good, Major."

Lorne grinned at her and slung an arm around her shoulders, feeling her tense at the contact. "Come on." He ignored the tension and propelling her towards the transporter. "You're going to bed."

"That an order?" Laura asked as the beam activated, sending them towards the family quarters.

"If you need it to be," Lorne answered throwing her a cocky grin. "It's an order."

When they neared her door, Laura opened her mouth to say something. Lorne cut her off immediately. "If you say thank you or sorry I'll assign you to toilet duty."

"Excuse me?"

"You were about to say either sorry or thank you," Lorne said, pointing at her. "You always do."

She blushed. "You're always –"

"Ah!" Lorne put a finger to her lips. "Just don't." He grinned at her. "I like doing it. I like spending time with Cara. And with you. And I know you're not really ready to hear that." His eyes turned serious, trapping hers. "I think she's a great kid. She reminds me of the Doc. And of you. Seems like she's got the best of both of you."

Laura could only look up at him, her stomach fluttering. "That's the sweetest thing to say."

"I mean it." He stepped closer, taking the chance, not caring if it meant crashing and burning. "I think you're beautiful."

"I'm a mess, Evan," Laura protested, her cheeks flushing with colour. "I've spent three days in the infirmary."

"You're beautiful," he repeated. "Listen to your superiors, Lieutenant."

"Yes, sir."

"You kissed me last night," he told her, pausing only a breath away from her face.

"I'm sorry." She was incapable of forming sentences.

"I'm not." His mouth found hers as he gently touched his lips to hers, lingering there to tease and torment.

With a little sigh she sank into the kiss, leaning against him. It felt right, was the thought registering in her brain. It felt just right.

He pulled back from her, pressing his forehead to hers. "I'm sorry."

"Why?" Obviously her brain still hadn't recovered enough to make sentences.

"Because I told myself I wouldn't do that. You're…not available." He could have cursed himself at the stricken look in her eyes. "Laura, don't. This…thing with us. It's always been there. Don't tell me you don't know that."

She shook her head again, tears threatening to spill. "I didn't want to feel anything for you."

He almost sighed in relief. "But you do."

She nodded slowly. "I don't know what it is. Or if I'm ready for it." Dropping her head onto his chest, she sighed once as he wrapped an arm around her. "But I don't want to lose out."

He took another chance and kissed her gently again. "We've got time."

**Ok, I'm unsure as to how well I've done this. Bet ye weren't expecting a new baby in this chapter!! At least it's not as long as the last one. Please let me know how ye feel about this one, I'm a little worried about it! And I hope nobody takes offence at the names. I like Eliza, it just doesn't go with Sheppard!! **


	10. Hurt Spots

**Hello, sorry it's been a few days since I updated, but my sister moved to Bahrain for a year and needless to say there were tearful goodbyes in our house this week. My poor mother still isn't over it! **

**Thanks for all your ****reviews; I can't believe I'm up to 80 already! Excuse any mistakes that I might make in this one, I'm a little distracted at the moment! **

**Rowena: I was getting tired of dancing around with them! So they kissed and they will probably do it again in this chap – yay!! **

**Agent1332: I wasn't sure about it, but the last time I used flashback people responded well to it, so I wanted to see if it'd fit. The PTB are going to shake the place up and various members of SG1 are coming out. I love SG1 loved the show and the characters so can't wait to try my hand at writing them! **

**Andromeda: Sorry to keep you waiting, as I said things have been hectic. So glad you liked it, I've been watching your updates too, and they're great! Did you like the name? I know you're a Weir fan and I'm a Sheyla shipper so I put that in so that I won't forget Elizabeth! **

**Bailey1ak: He's so matter of fact isn't he! Watch this space SG1 are on the way! **

**Asugar: You're welcome for the J/T scenes and there are plenty more of them to come, believe me. I love writing those two! I love Rodney's character, he's effortlessly funny and I think that David Hewlett is a great actor. As for John and Teyla, I'd like to think that he's mellowed out a little. I never thought about the ships, thanks for that one! There is unresolved angst with Jack and Sam to come. I've got big plans for them! **

**Thanks so much for the review it really helped and gave me ideas; I appreciate your input more than you know. If there are any little details nagging at you send me a PM and I'll write them in the next chapter for you! **

**John's Puddle Jumper: Thanks for the vote of confidence, it's great to hear it! I'm writing another fic at the moment, it's a series of one shots so if there are any bits in this one that you want more of, let me know and I'll put them in! **

**Elflinn: Torrin is a little ****pet; he's the darling of the base and of the expedition members and Cara is fast becoming one of my favourite characters! I'm really glad you like it! **

**Broderiesa: Les, that's a good one! Like the sound of that. I'll use it don't worry later on in the story. You'll have Sam and Jack for sure, Cam and Caro maybe later on in the story cos I've got Ronon and Jennifer's wedding to come too. **

**Tripwatcher2: Yeah, it was sweet wasn't it? It actually happened a friend of mine who had a baby before she married her husband and when their daughter was born he said those exact words to her. It was the sweetest thing I'd ever heard. **

**Lady Ardana: You're not the only one saying that! **

**Winchestergal78: I'm glad you like it, it's always good to hear. It is AU, totally unlike the Atlantis we see on the tv, but that's what makes it so fun. I am also a Ronon fan, who wouldn't be! He's just gorgeous. I seem to be making people cry, haven't figured out if that's good or bad yet but hey, I'm having great fun with this one. **

**Chapter 10. Hurt Spots **

Laura looked up from where she was settled on the couch with Cara as the chimes sounded. Cara had fallen asleep almost instantly when Lorne had accompanied them back to her quarters. Jennifer said that she'd be groggy and a little cranky for a few days until the infection wore off completely, but she should be back to her sunny self in no time.

For now, Laura was just glad to have her back in her own room where she could at least be comfortable while she watched her. John had kindly given her some more time off until Cara was cleared to go back to the nursery.

She tiptoed to the door, opening it to find Jennifer standing outside. Clearly off duty, the doctor was dressed in her blue jeans and a white t-shirt. She was carrying a stack of what looked like magazines and books. Beside her was a nurse Laura recognized as Susan Casey, one of the team of medical personnel who had taken care of Cara in the infirmary.

"Hey," Laura whispered. "Come on in."

"She's sleeping?" Susan whispered back. "I'll put her in bed and you can head on over to Teyla. She's waiting for you."

"Great," Laura whispered gratefully. "Thanks, Sue, you're a lifesaver."

"She's one of my best nurses," Jennifer told Laura as they made their way towards Teyla and John's quarters at the back of the family wing. "She'll take good care of her. "

"I know," Laura sighed. "It's just that she's so little and she was so sick…"

"She's tough," Jennifer contradicted. "She's a little fighter. Like you."

Laura raised her brows as she ran her hands over the sensor. "Me?"

The door opened and Teyla appeared, Lily in her arms. John was sprawled out on the floor, Torrin clambering all over his back. "Step into my world," Teyla said ruefully, gesturing towards her husband and son.

"Give her here," Jennifer demanded, dropping her stack of books and holding out her arms for Lily. She accepted the baby with practised ease and cooed delightedly at her. "Hello, baby. How's my newest patient doing?"

"She is wonderful." Teyla's eyes were glowing with maternal pride as she gazed at her daughter. "She never cries, unless she is hungry."

"And then Mama feeds her from her-"

"I think it's time that the boys left," John interrupted hurriedly, grinning at his wife. "Come on, Torrin. They're going to start doing girly things."

Torrin's face indicated his disgust as he trotted after his father, stopping when his mother called him. "Yes, Mama?"

"Have you forgotten something?"

He thought for a moment, his forehead scrunching up in concentration. John leaned over and kissed Lily, then flashed a grin at Teyla before kissing her too. Torrin's face lit up and he ran to kiss his little sister gently on the forehead. "Bye, Les." He threw his arms around his unsuspecting mother and hugged her tightly. "Love you, Mama."

"Love you back," Teyla replied. "Have fun and try not to hurt Rodney this time when you teach him sparring."

"It's not my fault he fights like a girl." John planted his hands on his hips. "He always gets hurt."

"She was talking to me," Torrin told him, giggling at his mother, who made flapping motions at him. "Bye, Mama." In a move so like his fathers it made Laura blink, he bowed slightly and shot them a grin. "Ladies."

"Lord in heaven," Jennifer exclaimed, looking at Teyla. "That child is a walking John Sheppard!"

"It's uncanny," Laura agreed, tucking her legs under her and sighing with relief as she settled back on the couch.

"She's getting big," Jennifer commented, grinning foolishly at the baby in her arms.

"She's five days old!"

"She grew," Jennifer said with a glare in Laura's direction. "Oh damn it, I'm going to want one. I thought I could wait, but I'm totally going to want one."

"They are a blessing," Teyla said, her eyes twinkling at Laura, who grinned. "And at times a curse!"

Jennifer burst out laughing. "Ok, you got me there. I don't think I'm ready for teething and diapers and all that stuff. But she's so cute!"

"Share her," Laura ordered, reaching out for Lily, who merely yawned and mewled like a sleepy kitten. Teyla settled herself into a chair opposite them and drew her legs up under her. Jennifer grabbed at the stack of books and pulled out the first one.

"I want that dress," she said, pointing at a photograph. "That exact dress."

"You've set a date?" Laura looked up from Lily's sleeping face. "When is it?"

"As soon as I can organise it," Jennifer said simply. "I've been waiting for this for almost four years. I don't want to wait anymore."

"Ah, love," Laura teased. "I remember it well!" She touched Lily's little cheek. "And the consequences too!"

"It is a special occasion," Teyla interrupted. "At least among my people. Earth weddings are different, but no less special. Who will perform the ceremony?"

"General O'Neill, I hope," Jennifer told them. "He's due to visit next week and then he'll be coming out for the yearly reviews in another month after that."

"You want to plan a wedding in a month?" Laura's jaw dropped. "Are you insane?"

"It's manageable," Jennifer argued. "All I need is a dress. The Daedalus and the Apollo are both coming out with Stargate Command and I've put in requests for a lot of what we'll need. Cake was top of the list," she added with a grin. "Henri says if I get him cake mix he'll get Kaunas to help him decorate it."

"You have the kitchen staff wrapped around your hand," Teyla stated. "What?"

Laura and Jennifer were laughing at her expressions. Teyla still tended to mix her expressions up despite John's best efforts.

The chimes pealed and Jennifer hopped up to open the door for Sam Carter. "Did I miss the party?"

"Not at all," Jennifer told her. "We just got started. I'm telling the girls about the dress I want."

"Great!" Sam grinned and lowered herself to the floor. "Hand her over, Lieutenant."

Laura hesitated, not wanting to let Lily go. "Really, Ma'am?"

"Give her here, Laura, and don't hog her!"

"Yes Ma'am," Laura sighed, passing the baby carefully to Sam, who cuddled her close and looked expectantly at Jennifer. "Go ahead, Jennifer, let's hear the latest."

"Well, General O'Neill has agreed to make the trip out again with the next supply run." Jennifer looked at them. "I'm getting the material for my dress this time. Teyla, if I gave Marina a picture of it, would she make it for me?"

"She would be honoured," Teyla answered. "It is kind of you to include my people in your wedding."

"They're practically my people too," Jennifer scoffed. "They've been my favourite patients for years!"

"What are we wearing?" Laura interrupted. "What colour?"

"Whatever colour you want," Jennifer answered. "Teyla, Marina has all the colours of the rainbow, if you and Laura go see her she can get you geared up in no time."

"Geared up?" Sam made a face. "Sounds like a mission."

"Speaking of," Jennifer mused. "How are Ronon and Evan getting on with the Qurans?"

"They went out there yesterday," Sam answered. "Major Lorne reported that there were several interesting materials and Dr Parrish is on his way there to see if we can use any of it."

"Anything explosive?" Laura perked up immediately. "Things that make noise and smoke?"

"Not yet," Sam laughed. "If they find anything do you want to go and check it out?"

"Yes ma'am." Laura nodded vigorously. "I've gotten the offworld travel bug again, and Cara is nearly ready to go back to the nursery."

"Or do you want to go and see Evan," Jennifer teased, delighted when Laura turned scarlet. "I knew it!"

Laura cast a quick look at Sam, who grinned at her. "Speak freely, Laura. I don't mind."

"I believe he has strong feelings for you," Teyla put in. "He looks at you when you don't know it."

"He does?" Jennifer gaped at her. "Damn, I've got to open my eyes. What else does he do?"

"Waits for her when she's in a room," Sam chimed in. "What? Just because I'm the boss doesn't mean I'm a robot! I see things too!"

"I told him he was toast," Jennifer declared. "What else?"

"He kissed me," Laura blurted out suddenly. "I mean he really kissed me." She looked at the three shocked faces in front of her.

"What? When? Why didn't you tell me?" Jennifer fired the questions at her.

"The day Lily was born, and I didn't tell you because I don't know how I feel about it." Laura took a deep breath. And grinned widely. "He can kiss."

"I'll bet," Sam said bluntly. She looked at them. "What! Not a robot, remember!"

"Why did he kiss you?" Jennifer blushed as Laura raised an eyebrow. "I don't mean it like that, you idiot! I mean why now?"

"Probably because I kissed him first." Laura folded her hands together and waited for the reaction.

"What? When!"

"Calm," Laura told Jennifer, laughing as she all but bounced off her chair. "It was a thank you. He's been amazing to Cara. And to me. He was right there when I needed him and – "

"Do you return his affections?" Teyla asked, reaching out for Lily when she began to fuss.

Laura blinked. "You don't pull any punches do you? I don't know." She sighed in frustration. "I haven't thought about another man since Carson…for years. I thought that I'd be with Carson forever. It's what I wanted."

"But Carson isn't here." Jennifer's voice was gentle. "Laura, you're too young to close off. Cara deserves a father."

"She has one," Laura said sharply. "She just can't see him." She caught Teyla's eye and bit her lip. "Sorry."

"I know what it is like to have strong feelings for a person and not be sure that you're not betraying the one who came before them." Teyla rocked Lily gently. "It is…confusing. And frightening. And unsettling."

"And wrong," Laura interrupted. "I made a promise to Carson."

"If you'd married Carson, you'd have made promises to him, too," Sam pointed out reasonably. "And one of those promises would have been 'til death do us part'." She saw the misery in Laura's eyes and patted her knee. "Laura, it's not wrong to feel something for Major Lorne."

"He's my CO," Laura argued.

"You're a Marine and he's Air Force," Sam shot back. "There's not a single rule against it."

"He's my CO," Laura repeated in despair. "What am I doing?"

"Laura," Sam began, twisting to face her. "I'm the leader of this expedition, and I'm your CO. Do you think less of me because I'm sitting here?"

"No ma'am."

"Good. Now listen. Whatever is happening between you and Lorne, don't use regs as an excuse not to pursue it." Sam sat back, satisfied when Laura had no response. "It's hard to have feelings for someone you think is wrong for you." Her blue eyes were sad. "It's very hard."

"Are you speaking of someone you left at home?" Teyla asked curiously. Sam never spoke of her life on Earth. She was a good leader and a good friend, but she was extremely private. She never dated, stating that as the boss it was unethical for her to get involved with any member of the expedition. Teyla privately suspected that she had someone in her life that she didn't want to reveal.

"Something like that," Sam answered, pulling herself back to reality with a jolt. "Anyway, as I was saying, it's not wrong for you to feel something for Major Lorne. And if he makes you happy then you should go for it."

"And tell us how it's going," Jennifer chimed in, to lighten the mood. "We're big on details!"

* * *

"I don't know what to do about her," Lorne admitted to Ronon as they made their way back to the Gate. "She's…"

"Got you tied into knots?" The Satedan grinned when Lorne shot him a dirty look. "I know how that feels." He thought of Jennifer with a fleeting smile.

"Knots don't even describe it," Lorne sighed, keeping his eyes peeled for any unwelcome additions to their party. "Dial the gate, Perkins, will you. I want to get home."

"Yes sir!"

The first shot rang out as the event horizon activated, making Ronon curse and drop to the ground, rolling over to get a shot in the direction of the attack. "Lorne, you ok?"

Lorne was lying on the ground, blood streaming from his temple. He didn't respond to Ronon's calls.

"He's knocked out!" Perkins, his arm bleeding from where he'd hit the rocky gravel near the gate, called out. "He's unconscious, I think."

Ronon swore viciously. Their attackers were still firing blasts of what looked like the flash of his own gun rapidly, forcing them to take cover behind the Gate.

"Miller, Perkins, get the Major," he ordered, peering out and firing in the direction he thought best. "Get him behind the gate and see if you can rouse him. Walsh, radio Atlantis and tell them to put the shield up."

* * *

"Control room to Colonel Carter."

"Go ahead," Sam said, rolling her eyes at the others. "This _bette_r be good."

"We have reports of Major Lorne's team coming in hard and in need of medical assistance, Ma'am."

"I'm on my way," Sam told him, getting to her feet hurriedly and casting an apologetic glance. "Can you patch Major Lorne through to me?"

"He's the injured party, Ma'am. Sergeant Perkins reports that he's unconscious and in need of immediate medical assistance. He appears to have been shot in the side with some sort of blast weapon."

"Ronon?" Sam asked neutrally, her eyes flicking to Jennifer, who was watching her intently.

"Right here," Ronon's voice said in her ear. The sounds of rapid gunfire could be heard behind him, the popping and firing making Sam wince instinctively. "Lorne's hurt pretty badly, but he'll live. Tell Jennifer to meet us in the Gate room. Ronon out."

Sam looked at Jennifer. "There's been an incident offworld. Major Lorne's team are requesting medical assistance in the Gate Room immediately."

Jennifer turned pale. "Ronon?" Her voice quavered slightly.

"He's fine," Sam assured her quickly. "I just spoke to him. He and Perkins are bringing the Major through."

"What happened to Evan?" Laura was getting to her feet. "Sorry, I mean Major Lorne." She gripped her hands together. "Ma'am?"

"He's been hit with some sort of blast weapon," Sam told her. "I'm sorry, I don't know anything else right now beyond he's unconscious but not critical. I have to go." She hurried from the room, Jennifer hot on her heels.

Teyla stood, holding Lily in her arms. "Laura, I am sure Evan is fine."

"I know." Laura bit her lip. "I just want to…Teyla, can you raise the Colonel on the radio and ask him for a status report?"

"Of course." Teyla set Lily into her crib and reached for her radio. "John, come in please."

"Sheppard here, go ahead."

"Major Lorne's team has been involved in some sort of incident offworld. Can you find out about it, please?" Teyla smiled reassuringly at Laura and waited patiently for her husband to come back to her. Moments later, her radio buzzed.

"He's ok, they're through the gate. Jennifer's taking him to the Infirmary. He's still out, but not seriously injured. Why do you want to know?" John sounded curious.

"I don't," Teyla answered, nodding at Laura. "Thank you. Our afternoon has been interrupted, so you can send Torrin back to me if you like."

"No, he's helping me here," John said, a smile in his voice. "We're at the gym if you want to come over and join us."

"I will. Teyla out." Tapping her earpiece to disconnect, Teyla turned to Laura. "They are fine. Evan was hit with some form of stunner blast, but he's fine now. He hit his head and was rendered unconscious. It happens all the time, Laura. John never goes offworld without getting shot at or injured in some way." She offered Laura a knowing grin. "Do you feel better now?"

"I feel foolish," Laura admitted with a sheepish smile. "He's not my husband. He's not anything, really."

"That is untrue," Teyla countered, picking Lily up and carefully wrapping her in her blanket. "He is something. You are just afraid of what it might be."

"Well." Laura sat down on the couch, blinking in surprise. "That about summed it up."

"I am all knowing when I wish to be," Teyla teased cheerfully. Her smile disappeared as she sat down beside Laura and looked steadily at her. "Laura, you are a friend. Despite your absence from Atlantis for the past few years, I consider you a friend as I would Jennifer and Sam."

"Thank you."

"And as your friend, I am asking you to tread carefully." Teyla's amber eyes were serious. "Evan is also a friend, and I have seen how he looks at you. He has strong feelings for you. And I do not wish to see him hurt in any way."

"And I could hurt him," Laura said, looking at her hands. "I know I could. I wish I knew what to do."

"Do what makes you happy," Teyla told her. She looked at the baby in her arms. "I promise you that the risk is worth it in the end."

Laura nodded. "I should get back to Cara, "she said quietly. "She's going to be awake soon."

"Bring her to the gym," Teyla suggested. "John and Torrin are there. It will do her good to get some exercise."

* * *

When Laura and Cara reached the gym, the sounds of bantos rods banging together were echoing around the room. Laura looked down at her daughter, who was almost vibrating with excitement. She hadn't seen her beloved Torrin in almost a week and she was eager to go and play.

"Colonel?" Laura tapped on the door and waited patiently for permission to enter. "Mind if we join you."

"Hey," John greeted them cheerfully from the middle of the floor, where he was patiently teaching Torrin to defend himself. "How's the patient?"

"I'm much better, thank you," Cara answered politely. "Why are you hitting Torrin with that stick?"

"He's not," Torrin shot back, glaring at her. "You're just a girl, you wouldn't know about it!"

"Torrin!" Teyla exclaimed, giving him a stern look. "That is not polite. Apologise to Cara immediately."

"Sorry," Torrin mumbled sheepishly. "I didn't mean it. You're pretty cool for a girl."

Laura's jaw dropped. "That's it," she murmured to Teyla, who was mirroring her expression. "They're not spending any more time with Rodney."

"Can I try?" Cara asked shyly. "I'd like to learn too. For when I go offworld like Mama."

Laura shuddered at the thought of her daughter needing to defend herself offworld. "Cara, sweetie, you need to be careful with those, ok?"

"I began to learn at her age," Teyla interjected calmly. "I will teach her. Would you take Lily, please?"

Laura obligingly took Lily from Teyla's arms and sat on the window ledge, watching as Teyla handed Cara a child's set of bantos rods, showing her the correct stance and how to strike and parry. Cara's face was a study in concentration, her little forehead creased in a frown as she imitated Teyla's slow movements.

John sat down beside her, Torrin at his feet. "Lorne didn't need surgery."

Laura twisted her head up to look at him. "That's good, sir."

"He'll be awake soon," John said, his tone light. "I reckon he'd like some visitors." His meaning was unmistakeable.

"Sir?"

"Cadman," John sighed, "you're a damn good Marine. One of the best soldiers under my command. Don't interrupt when I'm giving you a compliment, for God's sake."

"Sorry, sir."

"Anyway, as I was saying. You're a good soldier. But you're also a person. Don't let one take over from the other. Learn to be both."

"That's a little hard when the rules that you've followed for ten years are suddenly different," Laura argued. "I don't know which way is up anymore. I mean, Major Lorne tells me to call him Evan. You call me Laura off duty, and so does Colonel Carter. You outrank me, yet you talk to me like I'm your equal!"

"Lieutenant, I'm your CO. When you're in the field or on duty, you obey orders. When you're not, I'm just another man in the city." He grinned at her. "Better looking than most, I'll admit, but still."

Laura laughed softly. "Ronon is considered to be better looking than you, sir."

John gaped at her. "Really?"

"It's a toss up," Laura told him, enjoying herself. "Of course, McKay is currently the number one bachelor that the females want to –"

"That's enough," John interrupted hurriedly. "I feel nauseous."

"Sorry," Laura deadpanned. "I just thought you should know about it."

"Mama! Did you see what I did?" Cara was jumping up and down with excitement, her face flushed. "I hit Teyla twice!"

"You're learning fast," Laura told her with a smile. "You're going to be as good as me in no time!"

"You can fight?" Cara's eyes grew round with wonder. "Show me, Mama, please!"

"Not now, baby," Laura said. "Teyla can't fight properly yet, not so soon after having Lily."

"I'll hold Les," Torrin volunteered. He was watching the exchange with interest. "We'll see who wins!"

"Why do you call her Les when her name is Lily?" Cara demanded.

"Cos she's called Lily Emmagan Sheppard," Torrin told her, rolling his eyes when she looked blank. "L-E-S! Les!"

John shook his head. "He's way ahead of us."

"I cannot fight yet," Teyla admitted to her son. "But perhaps your father might like to take her on?" She looked at John, who shook his head.

"I need to get Cara to the Infirmary anyway," Laura told them. "Jen needs to clear her for nursery tomorrow, because I'm going offworld."

"Where are you headed?" John asked as he took Lily from Teyla and cradled her against his chest.

"I don't know yet," Laura replied. "I'm due for briefing at 08.00. Any preview for me?"

"Sorry," John answered glibly. "I'm off duty tomorrow. I," he added, kissing the top of his daughter's tiny head, "am playing Mr Mom tomorrow!"

"Nice," Laura laughed. "Good luck with that, sir."

"Thank you, Lieutenant. Now go and see the Major. I know you want to."

Laura's blush had him laughing softly to himself all the way back to his quarters.

* * *

"Mama, I want to see Evan too," Cara whined as Laura pulled on a sweater and brushed out her hair. "Why can't I go?"

"Because Jennifer says he needs rest," Laura said, looking at her reflection in the mirror. A flush spread across her cheeks as she realised that she was primping. What was wrong with her!

"Mama, why are you red?" Cara eyed her owlishly. "Are you sweet on Evan?"

Laura choked. "What? Where did you hear that?"

"Around," Cara said vaguely. "Mama are you? Cos if you don't want to marry him, I will!"

Laura could do no more than stare at her. It looked like her baby girl had developed her first crush.

It unfortunately looked as if her Mama had developed that same problem.

"Mama," Cara begged, tugging on her sleeve. "Let me come too, please. I'll be good. I'll be quiet. I won't make a sound!"

"The day you don't make a sound I'll know there's something wrong, " Laura muttered as she pulled Cara's favourite blue fleece from the pile of laundry on her bed and handed it to her. " Ok, you can come too. Put that on. Let's go!"

Cara bounded off the bed, laughing. "Love you, Mama!"

She chattered incessantly all the way to the infirmary, calling out to people she knew along the way. It never ceased to amaze her mother how easily Cara had adapted to life in Atlantis. She was part of something so huge and ground breaking, yet she accepted it with all the innocence and wonder of a child. No matter what happened, in Cara's world, Mama could make it all ok with a hug.

"He's just awake," Jennifer said with a smile as they came into the Infirmary. "Hey, Cara. Are you feeling better?"

"I am," Cara told her, holding out her hand and sticking out her tongue eagerly. "Check for yourself!"

"I'll do that," Jennifer said cheerfully. "Come on back with me and we'll check you out under the scanner. Laura, he's down at the end. Go ahead. I'll being her down when we're done."

Laura pulled back the curtain and looked in. Lorne's eyes were closed, a bandage covering his chest. He was sporting a large bruise across his cheekbone and his lip was cut. She sat down quietly in the chair. "Hi."

His eyes flew open. "Hi yourself." His voice was a croak. "Water?"

"Here." Laura held a cup to his dry lips. "You were hit with some sort of blast. Jen says you'll live. How are you feeling?"

"Like I got blasted by Ronon's gun," Lorne admitted, wincing as he attempted to smile. "Ow! Dammit!"

"Easy," Laura cautioned, setting the cup back down and taking her seat again. "What happened?"

"Ambushed at the gate," Lorne answered, closing his eyes. "Got me from the front. Perkins pulled me in when Ronon managed to keep them back. He and Miller have minor lacerations and Ronon has a cut on his leg that Jen says won't scar."

"So you came out of it the worst," Laura said calmly, even though she was far from calm.

"You worried about me?" Lorne peered up at her.

"No. Maybe." She smiled ruefully. "Yes."

He reached out and took her hand in his. "I was going away today, and Miller's wife was at the Gate."

"Evan, don't-"

"I wanted you to be there." Lorne spoke firmly. "I wished you were there. I looked around as if I expected you to be there."

"Evan." Undone, Laura held his hand up to her cheek. "I'm sorry." She fought back the tears that threatened to fall. "I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"Makes no odds," he answered lightly, even though his heart was racing in his chest. "Came back, didn't I?"

"Don't joke about it!" Laura admonished, letting go of his hand. "It's not funny!"

"Give that back," he ordered, taking her hand again. "That's better."

"Evan?" Cara stood at the entrance of the cubicle, her eyes huge. "Are you ok?"

"Hey, princess," Lorne smiled, ignoring the ache in his chest as he sat up. "I'm good, but I could sure use a hug. Think you could give me one?"

Cara's eyes were glued to the bandage on his chest and the bruising on his cheek. She shook her head slightly, tears filling her eyes.

"Come on," Lorne cajoled, holding out a hand. "I'll be much better if you do."

She hesitated before going to the bed and looking up at him. "Can I sit on your bed?"

"You can't give me that hug unless you do!"

She climbed up on the bed and settled in beside Lorne, snuggling into his shoulder carefully. "You have hurt spots," she said solemnly. "When I have hurt spots, Mama kisses them better."

"She does?" Lorne's eyes strayed to Laura's, the sudden flash of heat in them making her blush. "Wow."

Cara snuggled closer. "She'd kiss your hurts if you asked her. I never have to ask her, but she's not your Mama. Where's your Mama, Evan?"

Lorne laughed softly, his eyes locked on Laura's. "She's pretty far away. Do you think your Mama would help?"

"She sure would. She's the best Mama in two galaxies!" She smiled. "Rodney always talks about two galaxies. What's a galaxy?"

"Its bigger than a world," Lorne told her, smiling at her wide eyes. "And if your Mama's the best in the world, imagine two galaxies!"

"That's some compliment," Laura murmured, flushing. She smiled at Cara. "Evan needs to sleep now, Cara."

"I'm quiet, Mama," Cara told her firmly. She settled against him again and closed her eyes. "See!"

"Just a few more minutes," Laura told her. "OK?"

"Ok. But don't forget to kiss Evan better!"

"It does hurt," Lorne told her, a gleam in his blue eyes.

"Really," Laura said, amused. "Where?"

He raised the hand that wasn't stroking Cara's hair and tapped his shoulder. Laura obligingly leaned over and pressed her lips to the bruise there. With a smile, he pointed at his cheek. She repeated the motion, pressing her lips lightly to the torn skin.

"Better?" The room seemed to be too hot.

"Nope." He pointed at the cut on his lip. "Hurts."

"Really?"

"Yup."

Laura leaned down and gently kissed the spot above his lip. "There you go. All better."

"Not really." He did his best to look pitiful. "Still hurts."

"Where?" Laura looked sceptically at him.

"Here." He indicated his lip, his blue eyes pleading. "Hurts."

Laura laid a hand on her cheek, her heart pounding. She leaned forward and kissed him, gently as she could. He cupped the back of her head with his hand and pulled her closer, kissing her back with all the hunger he felt swirling inside. She smelled like flowers and tasted like vanilla. He didn't want to stop kissing her, despite the pain in his head.

Kissing Laura was like Christmas, all bright lights and sparks and heat.

Christmas always had been his favourite time of the year!

The sound of a soft giggle from Cara made them spring apart. She was looking at them, her blue eyes dancing. "Jen said that would happen. She said it was the best cure he could get!"

"Did she?" Laura's face was flushed, her eyes sparkling. Heat shimmered through her belly, making the butterflies dance madly.

"She's clever," Lorne agreed with a wink at Laura. "I feel better already." He smiled at Cara. "I don't mind getting hurt if your Mama kisses me better."

Cara clapped her hands together. "Now you can make a baby!"

* * *

Outside, Jennifer Keller clapped a hand to her mouth to keep from laughing as she observed Laura's jaw almost hit the floor. Ronon snuck up behind her, his arms wrapping around her waist.

"What's so funny?"

When Jennifer explained, he laughed softly. "Sounds like no fun at all to me."

Jennifer turned to lean her head against his heart. "Your leg ok?"

"Fine," he answered, stroking her hair. "Just wanted to see you." He tightened his arms around her. "Love you."

She frowned at him. "What have you done?"

"Ripped my stitches."

She gave him a look of pure exasperation. "How did you do that? Ronon, I don't have time to be patching you up. The Earth visitors are arriving tomorrow according to Colonel Carter's latest report. Are you going to behave?" When he didn't answer, she clucked at him. "Never mind. Come on. Let's take a look."

"Hurts," Ronon said, a wicked twinkle in his dark green eyes. "Kiss it better?"

Jennifer's face lit up in a smile. "Oh. So that's what you're after." She launched herself into his arms, wrapping hers around his neck and kissing him soundly. "Why on earth didn't you just ask?"

**That's all for now, folks. More to follow. Please review! Thanks for reading! Let me know if there's anything missing or anything ye don't like! Thanks for all the reviews, **

**Eva x**


	11. Old Friends, New Wounds

**Can you believe they cancelled the show?? When I got the PM from Whirlwind I almost threw up I can't believe they're not making any more episodes. The movies better be damn good and wrap things up exactly the way the fans want. I am raging!! **

**Anyhow, to get away from all that I am getting stuck on this a little. I don't know whether it's because I'm cross or whether I've run out of ideas! Help welcome from all corners. Also, McKay Keller anyone? Saw some spoilers online and Rodney told Jen he loves her. Any update on that one for me? Poor Ronon who will he end up with! **

**Back to the writing, thanks to all who reviewed. I promise I'll send replies as soon as I can get to a computer for longer than five minutes at a time. **

**Eva**

**Chapter 11. Old Friends, New Wounds. **

"Sam?" Jennifer stood in the doorway of Sam's office, her blue eyes concerned. Sam was staring into space, a faraway look in her eyes. "Sam? Are you ok?"

With a jolt, Sam snapped back to attention. "What? Yes. Fine. Did you need something?"

Jennifer surveyed the Colonel with a beady eye. "What's going on?"

"Did you need something?" Sam repeated patiently, signalling that the conversation was not going to go with Jennifer's direction. The doctor was like a bloodhound when she thought that something was wrong with any of her friends.

"Just to let you know that the Infirmary is ready for inspection before Stargate Command get here," Jennifer answered, letting the matter drop. "Do you need me to do anything else for you?"

Sam smiled distractedly. "Not right now, thanks." She tapped her earpiece. "Major Lorne, come in please."

"Lorne here."

"Is your team ready for inspection?" Sam twirled a lock of blonde hair between her fingers. "The Daedalus will be here in a few hours."

"Ready, ma'am. We'll be there when you give the order."

"Thank you, Major. Carter out." She tapped the earpiece again and sighed. "Jennifer?"

"Yes?" Jennifer turned back as she was about to exit the room.

"Thanks."

The doctor gave her a sympathetic smile. "Sam, we've survived countless inspections before. We'll get through this one too. They tried sending Woolsey out here before. It didn't work out." She dropped into the chair in front of Sam and leaned forward on her elbows. "You're a great leader. They know that."

Sam smiled again, but something was in her eyes that Jennifer hadn't seen in some time and it concerned her. "Thanks."

"Anytime," Jennifer smiled, getting up. She paused, turned back again. "Sam?"

"Yes?"

"You know where to find me. I'm a pretty good listener." With that, Jennifer headed across to the control room to speak to Rodney, who was muttering orders and tapping furiously on his laptop.

Sam sighed and turned back to her electronic organiser. It contained the itinerary for The Visit, as she'd begun to call it. Scrolling down again, she ran her eye over the message she'd received from Earth weeks before. General Landry had announced that he and General O'Neill would accompany several members of the IOA to Atlantis for an inspection of the City.

These routine visits had become part of life in Atlantis, especially since the first children had arrived and since the regulations had been relaxed enough to overlook certain relationships that would previously have resulted in court marshals and even dishonourable discharge.

Sam sighed as she remembered the first time she'd had to make such a decision. The couple in question had been two Marines under John Sheppard's command. She remembered the heartbreak in Captain Pierce's eyes as he sat in her office and confessed that he'd fallen for one of his fellow officers. She'd had to interview the other half of the distraught pair, Major Kira Nelson. The pair had faced being thrown out of the Corps along with being sent home in disgrace. Kira Nelson had begged her not to take action against Pierce, claiming it was her fault. What she hadn't known was that Pierce had said the exact same words to Sam in their interview.

John Sheppard had immediately sat down and drafted a request for an audience with General Landry to discuss the matter with him. It had resulted in a long drawn out battle for the life on Atlantis they now enjoyed.

Sam thought that the look in Nelson and Pierce's eyes when they got married was worth the sleepless nights and the internal struggle to go against the rules that had governed her life for so long. The rules that had made her who she was, that had led her to where she was.

The rules that essentially led to her being alone now, watching everyone else pair off and be happy. If she'd only had the chance two years before, if she'd only been stronger…

Oh no. She wouldn't start flogging that horse again. It was well and truly too late for that. Rules on Earth still applied. She couldn't just go looking for an exception because she was in another galaxy. That wouldn't do.  
Her radio buzzing made her jump. John was calling, asking if she was ready to hear the check in from Captain Davidson's team. She pulled her thoughts back to the present and ordered herself to get a grip.

What did it matter what she wanted. She was a leader. Leaders led. Theirs was not to question why or moan because she didn't have everything she wanted in life. She was a lot luckier than most.

"On my way, John." She left the room, her eyes determined. This would just be another inspection. Just another visit from SGC. She would be a good leader.

No matter how much it hurt.

* * *

"Something's bothering her," Jennifer confided to Teyla as she sat across from the Athosian in the mess hall. "It's something I can't put my finger on, but it's there."

"I agree," Teyla said calmly. "But we cannot force her to reveal anything she does not feel comfortable speaking about."

"I just knew you were going to say that," Jennifer frowned. She perked up as she noticed Laura approach. "Hey, Dynamite. How's it going?"

"_Dynamite_?" Laura grinned at her friend and eased herself into the chair next to Teyla. "That's completely _not_ original, Jen. Can't you come up with a better one? And what's with the nicknames anyway?"

Jennifer shrugged. "I had some time on my hands."

"Should you not be organising your wedding?" Teyla suggested, shifting Lily onto her shoulder and patting her back gently. "It is not far now."

"You two have more than helped with that," Jennifer tossed back. "Besides, my dress isn't going to be here for another three hours."

"They'll be here that soon?" Laura demanded, leaping to her feet. "Damn!"

"What's up with you?" Jennifer asked, gaping at her. "Has your workout with Ronon completely scrambled your brain?"

"He's tough," Laura admitted with a rueful smile. "I hurt all over and we've only had four lessons. I'd forgotten how much I like that part of the training."

"He is very thorough." Teyla smiled at her. "Just make sure he does not push you too hard. You are in excellent physical condition, but you have not sparred in some time. It can be difficult."

"Major Lorne was there the whole time." Laura's cheeks flushed, just a little. "He was telling him the same thing."

Jennifer looked furious. "Evan was training? I'll kick his ass if he ripped those stitches," she said crossly. "He's supposed to be taking it easy."

"Jennifer, I highly doubt you could take Major Lorne in hand to hand," Laura told her dryly. She shoved her hair back from her damp face. "I have to go and clean up. Force myself into the dress uniform and –"

"We're supposed to be in Atlantis uniform," Jennifer interrupted. "Something about unity and all of us being a unit apart from Stargate Command."

"That's weird," Laura said, wrinkling her nose. "I thought that we'd be the opposite."

"They are attempting to show the newest member of the IOA what life on Atlantis is really like," Teyla said. She grinned at Lily, who was valiantly trying to focus green eyes on her mother. "I think Sam is nervous that they will reassign her, as they did before."

"Please!" Jennifer scoffed. "Woolsey was ok at best. Nothing like Sam. She's one of the best I've ever worked for!"

"Thank you," Sam's voice said from behind her. "That's comforting." She smiled at Teyla. "How's Baby Sheppard doing?"

"She is very well," Teyla replied with an answering smile. "She is her Daddy's darling already."

"I'll just bet!" Sam touched Lily's little nose. "How's the training going, Lieutenant?"

"Very well, Ma'am," Laura answered with a grimace. "I'll hurt in places I'd forgotten I had, but it'll be worth it."

"Just don't push it too hard too fast," Sam cautioned. "I don't want to have to ground you!"

"My last mission kicked ass - sorry Ma'am - was immensely successful." Laura corrected herself quickly, ignoring Jennifer's snort of laughter. "I won't do anything to jeopardise the next one." She gave Sam a wide grin. "I'll be on my best behaviour, I promise!"

"Yeah right," Jennifer muttered under her breath. "You never did that before!"

"I'm glad to hear it," Sam said with a mock glare at Jennifer and the first real smile they'd seen for days. "Now, get in uniform, please. I want you all assembled at the gate at 16.00." She was grinning to herself as she walked away, thinking that the young Lieutenant was coming along exactly as Cam Mitchell had predicted she would and getting right back to the Laura Cadman they had all known before.

* * *

"She's nervous," Laura commented idly as they stood in unison to go and get prepared. "It's bad that she's nervous, isn't it?"

"General Landry usually does the yearly inspections," Jennifer said, lowering her voice as a group of soldiers passed them on the way to the transporter. "General O'Neill doesn't come out unless the President wants something. The last time we had anything to do with him was two years ago, when we were home for Cam's wedding. Teyla, you were there, right?"

"I was," Teyla confirmed. "John and I had to...clear...our intention to marry with your President and with Stargate Command. General O'Neill is an advisor to you president, is he not? Perhaps he wishes to send you a message from the Big House."

"White House," Jennifer corrected with a giggle. "It's the White House. Teyla, we've got to get you some more lessons in Earth speak."

"We can't help his election campaign here," Laura quipped, making the other two laugh. She pressed the button for the family wing. "I need to pick up Cara and get her dressed. She can't wait to see General Landry. She's just disappointed that Colonel Mitchell isn't coming out this time. She misses him."

"Cam's great," Jennifer said cheerfully. "His Dad was in the Air Force with mine. Apparently his mother has pictures of us when he was eight and I was five. We were going to be married, according to her."

Teyla gaped at her. "I do not believe you have told us this before."

Jennifer shrugged, her cheeks flushed slightly. "It's not something I'd advertise, not since he married Carolyn anyway. Those two just revved like engines around each other from the minute they met."

Laura was laughing as she opened the door to the daycare quarters. "That's the truth! I remember the time Cam got hurt going offworld when she'd told him he wasn't to go."

"He defied doctor's orders." Jennifer looked disgusted. "I _hate _when they do that."

"I have only met Dr Lam twice," Teyla said, "but I would not like to…how does John say it…go a round with her?"

"Carolyn does not suffer fools gladly," Laura stated. "Still, she and Cam have been amazing godparents to Cara."

"Mama!" With a squeal, Cara launched herself at Laura, who caught her and hugged her tightly. She relished these moments with her daughter, knowing that soon Cara would be too old to be picked up and cuddled. She dreaded the day her little girl got too grown up for cuddles with Mama.

"Hello, Cara," Teyla said, looking around for Torrin. "Where is Torrin?"

"I'm here, Mama," Torrin piped up from behind her. "Is it time for the Earth people to come yet?"

"Soon," Teyla told him, holding out a hand. "First we must go and clean up. There will be dinner later when General Landry and General O'Neill finish their debrief with Sam and your father."

"Is Evan going to the brief?" Cara demanded. "He promised he'd take me to see the Jumper."

"He will if he can, baby," Laura promised. "He may be needed. But General Landry is coming, remember."

Cara pouted. "Uncle Cam isn't going to be here." She turned pleading eyes to her mother. "Can we go home and see him?"

Laura sighed. "We'll see. Right now, we need to go get cleaned up and be at the Gate for the beam. Think you can do that?"

The word beam made Cara perk up, so much so that she didn't object to having her curls washed and brushed and putting on her party dress. She chattered all the time, telling Laura about Torrin and how he looked after her and didn't allow the others to laugh at her because she couldn't reach the door controls.

Laura smiled and nodded in all the right places, wondering all the while how her interview was going to go and if she'd pass IOA inspection. It was mandatory for all newcomers to the base to be interviewed after three months there. Usually, the interviews took place at Stargate Command, but this one would be different as the new IOA rep would be present.

"You look pretty, Mama," Cara told her as she finished pinning her hair back and stood up. "I like your hair."

"You look pretty too, sweetheart," Laura told her. "Let's go. And remember, you-"

"Have to be respectful of my elders and your superior officers and not fight with Torrin and not behave like a wee hooligan and not annoy Rodney and not cause any sort of disturbance whatsoever!" Cara rattled off the mantra without blinking. She rolled her eyes at her mother. "Mama, I know what to do. I am almost five now. I'm a big girl!"

Laura felt the insane urge to weep. "Yes you are. Come on. We need to go."

* * *

Lorne stood in line with the rest of the military contingent and resisted the urge to look around and check where Laura was. It had been almost a week since he'd been released from the infirmary. While he'd been stuck there, she'd come to visit him every day. Sometimes Cara would come with her and curl up in his lap. Other times she'd come alone and sit next to him, her hand tucked loosely in his.

He had relished every moment spent with her. He just didn't tell her that, not wanting to frighten her. He figured that given enough time, she would lose that sadness in her eyes and realise that she didn't have to mourn Carson forever.

He'd liked and respected the Doc as much as anyone else on the base. He'd been honoured to act as pallbearer for the funeral. And he'd hurt for Laura when they'd told her Carson was gone. It wasn't a nice thing to say, but he'd been glad to get back to Atlantis when it was time to leave. The grief and devastation in the young Lieutenant's eyes had made him feel helpless.

Lorne didn't like feeling helpless.

Carson had left a piece of himself behind in Cara. The thought of the little girl made him smile. She was a pistol for sure. The way she held up her arms for a hug, or demanded to be brought offworld, or even just the way she would rest her head on his shoulder made him feel ten feet tall. It was as easy to love the child as the mother.

Where in the hell had that come from, he thought in a panic.

"Lorne?" John was watching him warily, wondering what on earth had made his usually calm 2IC turn white. "Major, are you ok?"

Lorne snapped back to reality with a start. "Yes sir. Sorry, sir. What?"

John sniggered softly, earning himself a glare from Sam. "Get your head off cloud Cadman until the first round of interviews are over, ok?"

Lorne wondered if he'd be court marshalled for sticking out his tongue at his CO. Deciding that it probably wasn't the wisest course of action, he merely nodded and watched as Sam faced the group.

"Attention all personnel." Her voice was both calm and commanding at once. "Colonel Caldwell has just radioed to tell us that he and Colonel Ellis are in orbit above us. They will beam down the officers from Stargate Command before docking on the East pier and the rest of the crew will join us then." She looked around at all the serious faces before her. "I don't need to remind anyone that this is a formal inspection. Although we're well established here, nothing is permanent."

"Damn IOA," Rodney could be heard muttering in the background. He subsided when Ronon threw him a look. "Sorry."

"However," Sam continued with a glare at them both, "I also want to say, while I have you all together, that you are all doing a fine job in your respective fields." Now she smiled at them. "I don't often get to say this, but I'm proud of all we've achieved here. "

"Colonel," Chuck called out. "They're ready."

Sam nodded and tapped her earpiece. "Colonel Caldwell, Colonel Ellis," she called out. "You may beam down your passengers." She paused and looked at John, who nodded. "We're ready for them."

The bright light shot through the room, leaving four silhouettes behind it. The tall figure of Jack O'Neill was seen alongside the stouter form of General Landry. Flanking them were Richard Woolsey and another woman whom Sam presumed to be the new IOA member. She was tall and willowy, with wavy black hair and piercing violet eyes.

Taking a deep breath, Sam stepped forward and saluted sharply. "General Landry, General O'Neill, Mr Woolsey." She nodded to the stranger. "Ma'am. Welcome to Atlantis."

The entire military contingent came to attention as the two generals saluted in return. Jack looked at them, a hint of amusement in his dark eyes. "At ease," he said, giving them a vague wave. "That doesn't look comfortable."

Sam's lips quirked. "Welcome, sir. It's good to see you." She looked at General Landry and her smile widened. "Sir, it's wonderful to see you too."

"Hello, Colonel," Landry responded, his eyes twinkling. "We've brought some packages for you from your old team mates. They'll be unloaded shortly along with the rest of your supplies."

"Thank you, sir," Sam replied. She looked at Jack and for a moment her heart kicked violently. "I'll arrange to have you shown to your quarters immediately, if you'd like."

"This is Kate Mosley," Jack said, his face blank. "She's the new IOA rep we talked about."

Sam smiled at the woman. "Welcome, Ms Mosley."

"Call me Kate," the other woman said with a smile. "This is a great city you've got here." She peered around. "Where's the military leader?"

"Right here," John answered, stepping forward. "Pleasure to meet you, Ma'am. Sir." He nodded to General Landry, who grinned at him.

"Looking good, Sheppard."

"Thank you, sir." John grinned at him, and then turned to Jack. "General O'Neill, good to see you again, sir."

"Thank you, Colonel," Jack responded dryly. "I hear congratulations are in order. Heard that pretty wife of yours had a baby."

"General O'Neill," Teyla said graciously, stepping forward with her usual serene smile. Lily was cradled in her arms. "It is very good to see you again." She touched her forehead to his, ignoring his look of discomfort.

"Thank you," Jack said as he peered down at Lily. "She's got your colouring," he said to John, who nodded proudly. "Let's hope she takes after her mother," the General continued, winking at Teyla.

"Gen'ral Landry!" The excited squeak came from Cara, who couldn't contain herself anymore and wriggled free of her mother's hold to run to the elder General, who caught her in a bear hug.

Lorne's jaw dropped. The child could charm the birds straight from the trees. Why was he even surprised? He caught sight of Laura's mortified face and Jennifer's barely contained grin and resisted the urge to laugh.

Cara was dragging the General towards her mother, the assembled military parting like the red sea as she did so. Laura turned bright red and snapped to attention as General Landry regarded her with amused eyes.

"Lieutenant. Good to see your offspring here hasn't changed."

Mortified, Laura vowed to have another chat with her daughter as soon as she got her alone. "Thank you, sir." Despite the easy friendship forged with Cam Mitchell and the rest of SG1, she was still wary of the General. He was just too far above her in rank for her to ever relax fully around him.

Cara had no such trouble. At four, rank and designation didn't matter to her. People were just people. She was chattering to the General as he continued down the line, nodding right and left to people he recognised.

"You look good," Jack commented to Sam as she dismissed the military and civilian personnel with a quick command and showed them towards the conference room. "This place suits you."

She nodded, not trusting herself to speak just yet.

"Colonel?" Major Allen stood to attention outside the door of the conference room. "The room is ready for your use."

"Thank you, Major," Sam said with a smile. "Can you have all the heads of staff sent up as soon as possible? Oh, and tell Major Lorne to accompany Colonel Sheppard."

"Yes ma'am."

She entered the room and took her seat at the head of the table. "Have a seat, sir."

"You look relaxed. Settled." Jack was not to be deterred. "Mitchell told me that you were happy here."

"He was right," Sam said stiffly. She looked up as Rodney sauntered into the room, followed by Jennifer. John Sheppard was hot on her heels. Sarah Larson and Lorne came in together, looking a little nervous.

"Sit down, people," was all Jack said, gesturing towards the chairs. He waited until Woolsey and Kate Mosley took their seats and then looked around. "Ok. Let's get this started, shall we."

* * *

Sam closed the door to her office and allowed herself to lean against the wall for a moment. Just one moment, she thought, to regain some of the control that seemed to slip of its own accord around Jack.

General O'Neill, she thought grimly, running a hand through her hair. Stop calling him Jack. Stop thinking of him as Jack. He's your superior officer. You're both U.S. Air Force. There are rules! Just…stop.

The knock made her jump. She whirled around to find Colonel Steven Caldwell in the doorway. He was smiling at her.

"Steven!" She grinned and reached up to hug him. "How are you?"

"Not bad," he replied cheerfully, dropping into a chair and crossing long legs at the ankles. "Ellis is on his way. We're unloading your supplies. Novak commandeered some of your marines to help out."

"Great," Sam said contentedly, taking a seat and curling her legs under her. "How's Moira doing? And the kids?"

The Colonel's usually stern features softened at the mention of his family. "She's great. Sends her love. She wanted to come out, but she's doing some peacekeeping mission in Zimbabwe and couldn't make it." He grinned. "David is playing football, quarterback, but he wants to fly the Olympia when he graduates. Emily just wants to see the world. From space. They wanted to come out too, but end of year exams and all that."

"Next time," Sam told him. "Tell her I was asking for her and the kids too."

"Colonels," Ellis said stiffly, standing at the entrance. "May I?"

"Good to see you," Sam told him, shaking his hand. Despite hundreds visits to Atlantis, he still hadn't lost that air of formality he carried around like a mantle. Colonel Caldwell had been offered a posting of his choice two years before, including command of Atlantis, but he had opted to continue flying his beloved ship between Galaxies.

Even with the two new Earth ships in orbit around the Milky Way, Colonel Caldwell was content to be a part of the Atlantis expedition and in spite of a shaky start, he was now one of the most respected members of the Stargate personnel. His marriage to a missionary, Moira Banks, three years before and his subsequent adoption of her two teenage children had softened people's opinion of him. The pride he took in his family and the obvious love he had for them was, in Sam's opinion, all that mattered.

"How did the debrief go?" Caldwell asked with interest. "Did you get the new staff you asked for?"

Sam pointed to the stack of personnel files on her desk. "We got twenty new civilians and a new contingent of Marines. We're only losing ten this time. You'll have space on your ships going home."

"They asked us both to come out here," Ellis cut in. "I'm wondering why."

"To show off to the IOA?" Caldwell suggested. "Who cares, Ellis. We get to spend a full week of downtime on Atlantis, putting the fear of God into the new recruits." With a contented smile, he leaned back in his chair. "Ours is not to question why."

"I need to meet the new staff," Sam said with a chuckle. "Why don't you two go and check on your ships and make sure that they're offloading the right supplies to the right places. I don't want to find the food supplies over in the botany lab this time!"

"That was Novak's fault," Caldwell retorted. "The woman is neurotic."

"Thank you, sir," Lindsey Novak's cheerful voice said. "I think very highly of you too." The tall, thin brunette saluted Sam. "Hello, Colonel. I just wanted to let you know that all the new personnel are ready to meet you. You can set up in the conference room for the civilians and the military are all down with Colonel Sheppard in the north tower."

"Thanks, Novak," Sam said with an easy smile. "Go get some dinner. And make sure you have some fun while you're here, ok?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Lindsey said gleefully.

An hour later, Sam had waded through most of the civilian newcomers and was exhausted from trying to get them all straight in her head. She looked at the woman in front of her and smiled. "It's going to be different here," she said, trying to put the woman at ease. "Atlantis is another world. But it's home to those who live here and I hope you'll be very happy here."

"Thank you, Colonel Carter."

Sam looked at her. Beth Houlihan had come highly recommended from Stargate Command as a teacher and as a qualified paediatric nurse. She had worked in the infirmary back on Earth under Carolyn Lam, who had deemed her more than capable of taking up the position in the children's wing on the Atlantis base.

"I understand from your file that your family are here too," she said. "You have a son?"

Beth's lovely face softened into a smile that Sam thought of as purely maternal. "I do. He's eight months old. His name is Michael." Her voice had a lovely Irish lilt to it. "My fiancé is part of the science department here. He's a doctor of Ancient Technology." She grinned, blue eyes lighting up. "He just loves his gadgets, does my John."

"Don't they all," Sam said dryly. "Well, I'll let you get settled. We're glad to have you here. You can report to Sarah Larson at 09.00 tomorrow."

Beth stood, tossing back her dark brown hair. "Thank you, Colonel. Good night to you."

Sam wandered over to the door when she'd gone, thankful that there were no more to interview that night. It had been a long couple of hours and while it was relatively early, she was tired.

Heading out onto the balcony, she breathed in the salty air and closed her eyes. Footsteps behind her made her jerk her head around.

"Nice night," Jack O'Neill commented, his voice light. "How'd the interviews go?"

"Very well," Sam said flatly. "You chose well for the new vacancies."

Jack leaned his hands against the railing and looked straight out to the ocean. "How are you, Carter?"

"Very good, sir."

"Really?" He looked at her now, only his eyes indicating that he was anything other than calm.

"Yes, sir." Sam stared straight ahead and cursed herself for a fool. She had known the man for too many years. Had been on hundreds of missions with him and been in more hairy situations with him than she cared to recall.

She wasn't young and stupid and falling headlong in love with her CO anymore. She was past all that. Being moved to another galaxy was supposed to cure a person of romantic notions.

"Carter," Jack sighed and turned to her. "I wanted to talk to you about our last conversation. In person," he added when she raised her eyebrows at him. "The weekly data bursts don't count and I've been in Washington more than usual lately."

Sam's spine stiffened. "That was almost two years ago," she said calmly. "It was Cam's wedding."

"Yes," Jack murmured, looking at her. "It was."

"Sir, I don't think that we should talk about it."

"I'm retiring." The words cut through the air like a knife. "At the end of the month."

Sam looked at him wondering how two words could hurt so much. "Congratulations," she said flatly. "Please excuse me, I have to go and see to the new marines."

"Carter, did you hear me?" Jack spoke louder. "I'm retiring." He fixed those dark eyes on hers, and something in them frightened her.

Sam whirled around and began to pace rapidly. "What do you want me to say? I'm happy that you're doing something you always wanted to do. Retire and go fishing." The hurt was there, years of it, too deep to hide. "I don't know what you want from me. I told you, two years ago, how I felt. You brushed me aside."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't want your pity," Sam said hotly. Tears threatened but she fought them back ruthlessly. "I don't want anything from you. _Sir_." The word was like acid, burning between them.

"Sam…" Jack stepped forward, struck by the misery in her eyes.

"Don't." She held up a hand, closed her eyes. Images flashed through her head, of all the times they had gone on missions together, been injured, been captured. All the times he had rescued her and the times she had rescued him. The goodbyes, the worry, the countless moments that came with serving under his command for eight years and sporadic visits from him for the two after he'd left.

"_I care about her. A lot more than I'm supposed to."_

The words echoed in her head as they had done so many years before when he'd said them in front of her, as he was strapped to the Tokra lie detector.

"Sam." He said her name again, reached out to take her hand.

"It's too late," she whispered, shaking her head. "I waited for you for too long. And now it's too late." Shaking her head again, she stepped away from him and fled towards the nearest transporter.

Jack was left standing after her, reeling. This was not how he'd envisaged their reunion.

* * *

Laura watched as Sam rushed past where she was talking to some of the new Marines. Her sharp eyes noted the distress on her CO's face and the tension in her shoulders. She looked around for Jennifer, who nodded to indicate that she had seen it too.

"Everything ok?" Lorne asked her, coming to her side. "You seem distracted."

She smiled at him amazed at how he just seemed to be there when she wanted him. "I'll explain later. Can you take Cara back to my quarters when you're ready to go? There's something I need to do."

He nodded immediately. "I'll get her to bed. Take your time." He squeezed her hand briefly, enjoying the way a slight flush teased her cheeks. "See you soon."

"Come on," Jennifer said with a teasing glance after Lorne. "You two can snuggle later." She ignored Laura's sputter of outrage and dragged her friend after Sam. "Where would she go?"

"To the West Pier," Laura said softly. "It's where most people don't go because of the high tide there."

Jennifer sighed at the mention of the tide and looked at her uniform. "It's only the standard issue rags," she said after a moment. "Let's go."

They found Sam standing at the very end of the pier, looking out at the waves. The wind whipped her hair out of its knot and around her face in wet blonde ropes.

"Sam?" Jennifer stepped forward, bracing her shoulders against the biting wind. "Sam?"

The misery in their leader's blue eyes touched Laura. "Colonel Carter?"

No answer.

"Ma'am?" Laura tried again, louder.

"Sam, what happened?" Jennifer touched her arm. "Did they send you home?"

With a wordless shake of her head, Sam turned to look at her.

"Then what?" Jennifer questioned. "What's got you so upset?"

"He's retiring." The words were flat.

"Who? General Landry?" Laura was puzzled. "Colonel, that's no secret. He always said he'd retire when he hit sixty five."

"General O'Neill," Sam corrected her. "He's retiring." Her breath began to hitch. "He came all the way out here to tell me that."

Understanding dawned in Laura's eyes and with it, sympathy. "He's the one, isn't' he?"

Dumb with misery, Sam could only nod. Jennifer wrapped an arm around her shoulders and held on.

"Permission to speak freely, Ma'am?" Laura waited for Sam to nod again before stepping to flank her other side. "He's an ass."

Sam laughed mirthlessly. "I could have told you that."

"How long?" Jennifer asked quietly. "How long have you felt this way about him?"

"I can't remember a time when I didn't," Sam said simply. She closed her eyes. "I told him, at Cameron's wedding. I had to. He told me that it wasn't the right time."

"Ass," Laura repeated, making them both smile.

"I waited," Sam continued, not noticing the howling wind and the spray from the ocean drenching her face. "I got sent back here, and I waited some more. But it was never the right time. So I realised that I couldn't wait anymore." Her voice was flat once more, her eyes heartbroken. "It's too late."

"Is it?" Laura looked up at her. "I know what it's like to be in love. To not see someone you want to be with. I know what it's like to lose them. And I know what it's like to be given a second chance at something."

"It's never too late," Jennifer put in. "Not unless you let it be."

Sam's eyes filled. "I can't do this," she said brokenly. "I can't hope and have it dashed again. I just can't anymore."

"Sam." Jennifer pulled her into a hug, wishing that she hadn't felt the need to keep this to herself for so many years. "We'd have listened. Helped. Done something."

"There's nothing you could have done," Sam mumbled. Some instinct made her turn around. She paled instantly.

Laura swung around to see Jack standing there, an unreadable expression on his face. She straightened immediately. "Sir."

Jennifer eyeballed him. "General, this isn't the best time…"

"Thank you, Doctor," Jack said quietly. "Lieutenant? Could you give us a moment, please?"

Laura looked to Sam for confirmation. "Colonel?"

Sam nodded, her face stony. "It's ok. Tell John I'll be just a moment."

Laura nodded and stepped back. She bit back a laugh when she heard Jennifer tell the General that she had a reserve of extra blunt needles for people who hurt her friends. With all the respect due a General, of course.

"Thank you, Doctor," Jack repeated, his expression blank, his dark eyes stony. "I'll bear that in mind."

Jennifer followed Laura back towards the entrance to the west wing of the city, muttering under her breath.

"She's in charge, Jen," Laura pointed out. "She gets to tell us to leave them alone if she wants to."

"I don't like it," Jennifer said fiercely. "I'm not military. They can't technically order me around." She was pressing her nose to the window, peering into the darkness. "I can barely make them out, but he's talking. And gesturing. A lot. Damn, I wish I could hear what he's saying. It just better be good!"

"Stop it," Laura ordered, tugging at her. "You were never like this before you were CMO! You used to be quiet! Shy, even! What happened to you?"

"Ronon," Jennifer retorted, digging in her heels. "And several saving the world type crises that lead to me growing a figurative pair." She refused to budge. "He's coming back in!"

"Crap." Laura gave up and pressed her own face to the window. She watched as Jack stalked back towards their position, anger radiating off him in waves. "He's really mad."

"She's not," Jennifer said, pointing to the lone figure left at the end of the pier. "Look."

"Move!" Laura hissed out the command, ducking behind one of the stone pillars and pulling Jennifer with her. "He'll see you!"

Jack stomped past them, his face grim. They waited until he had gone before rushing to the window again.

"Crap," Jennifer whispered, her own eyes filling with sympathetic tears.

At the end of the pier, Sam covered her face with her hands and wept.

**Cliffhanger, I know! I'm sorry. It's 1 am and I'm exhausted. I'm also well p-ed off with TPTB for cancelling the show so I'm in angst mode. As always, let me know what you like/dislike etc. Sorry I took so long to update, I'll try and be better from now on!**


	12. Babies, bubbles and some friendly advice

**Hi guys, sorry it's been so long since I last updated, I had exams to do and I was up to my neck at work with recruitment. I hope that ye like this latest instalment, I had a great time writing it. I want to say a huge thanks to Asugar for being a fabulous beta, she was amazing and I know this wouldn't have turned out right without her input so thank you Asugar, you're a star! **

**Olive Girl 92: I don't think I've heard from you already, welcome. Sam and Jack are an ongoing saga of mine and I promise that it's going to be ok. Eventually! Cos I'm just evil that way! **

**RowenaR: I'm so sorry! I've been keeping up to yours too and I think it's amazing I'm eagerly awaiting chap 9 of that! God I hope that they have Kavan in it. Atlantis wouldn't be the same without him. And as for Sam/Jack, those two could never just be "fixed and paired off" like that. It just wouldn't be realistic. I'm flooded with ideas about it I'll let you know as they come to me! **

**bailey1ak: Sam seems sad sometimes on the show, so I conjured up a little background story that seemed to grow. Thanks for the review and sorry I took so long to get back with the new one! **

**tinypennie: Great pen name! Thanks, I love his character and I'm glad you like the story. It's my baby! **

**Asugar: What can I say but thanks again. You're fantastic! **

**Oma: You're retiring lets make babies? Never thought of that one but it's a funny thought! Any chance of more from you in your writing? I'm looking for more reading material now that I'm study free for a while!**

**John's Puddle Jumper: You had a long wait for this one, sorry about that! Hope you like it! Corrected that little blurb about the Air Force, thanks for the tip!**

**Andromeda: I love Sam/Jack. Always did. Hated Pete! The edge of your seat must be getting uncomfortable. I hope to have Chapter 13 up by the end of the week if at all possible. **

**MiaRose 156: Cara is hilarious and just the best fun to write. She seems to be everyone's favourite character so far. Thanks for the review, I live for them! **

**Chapter 12. Babies, bubbles and friendly advice. **

John opened his eyes as Lily started to whimper and cast his gaze towards his wife. Teyla lay beside him, one hand tucked under her chin, the other resting on his heart. Her dark gold hair was spread across the pillow, her face serene in sleep.

He knew she was exhausted from playing her part as Atlantis' military commander's wife. The welcome party for the new recruits had gone on well into the night, but she'd had to plead exhaustion and go to bed several hours before he had.

His wife had been the recipient of quite a few admiring glances, from both the male and female newcomers. A grin spread across his face as he remembered how Lorne had cut one overeager young scientist with a single glare when he'd stood too close to Teyla. Cadman, standing next to the major at the time, had handed Lily back to her mother and turned to eyeball the scientist with an almost feral grin. The poor kid had turned tail and made to dart away, banging straight into Ronon as he did so.

If the look on Cadman's face hadn't been enough to scare him, then six-foot- our of menacing Satedan had finished him off completely. John figured that he wouldn't so much as look in Teyla's direction for quite some time.

Damn if that didn't make him sigh with glee. It wasn't that he didn't realise how capable Teyla was of taking care of herself. Oh no, he was well aware of just how easily she could take down even the toughest Marine, with her bantos rods or just one of those steady glares she was so good at dishing out. It was the principle of it. He was the military commander and Teyla was his wife. The rings on her finger meant that she was off the market and he would have been remiss in his duties as her husband if he hadn't ground his boot into that little punk's foot. The memory made him smile with satisfaction.

Lily whimpered again and he heard sucking noises from the crib near the window. Throwing off the light blanket, he checked to make sure Teyla was still sleeping and tiptoed to where his daughter was moving restlessly.

"What's up with you?" he murmured softly, leaning down to gaze in at her. "You were fed an hour ago, you can't be hungry."

In answer, Lily let out a mewling sound like a kitten and opened her eyes. She looked straight up at him and blinked rapidly, trying to focus on his face.

John reached out for her and cradled her gently against his chest, marvelling at how he could have helped create something so perfect. Lily had his colouring;:the same dark hair and her eyes had already turned green, like his. She had her mother's serene disposition though, thank God, he thought with an absent grin.

"It's too early to get up, baby," he whispered to her. " But how about we go and see what the rest of the city is up to?"

Pulling on a cotton t-shirt with his sweatpants, he shoved his feet into trainers, checking to make sure Teyla was still sleeping. He grabbed the pretty blanket the Athosian women had given to them as a present after Lily's birth and picked up his daughter so he could wrap her in it. With one last glance behind him, he carried his squirming bundle from the room.

With a small smile, Teyla opened her eyes and yawned. She had instinctively woken when Lily did, but had decided to let her husband get up with the baby. A movement from the corner of her eye made her sit up slightly. She relaxed when she spotted Torrin tiptoeing into the room.

"Mama?"

"Yes?"

"Where's Papa gone with Les?"

"I believe he is taking her for a walk," Teyla answered with another yawn. "Perhaps you would like to keep me company until he gets back?" She held out one hand to her son.

Torrin nodded immediately and climbed into the warm space vacated by his father, curling up against his mother and closing his eyes.

Within seconds, both were sound asleep.

* * *

John wandered down the hall towards the mess, murmuring softly to Lily as he did. The baby's wide green gaze never left her father's face. It was a particular favourite pastime of his, wandering the halls after everyone was asleep. Atlantis showed another side of her personality at night, the soft lights and deep shadows making it almost like another world. He'd always felt at home on Atlantis, right from the moment he'd stepped into the gater om years before and the city had begun to light up for him.

He turned into the mess hall and stopped in surprise when he saw the room's only other occupant.

"Good morning, sir." He added a casual salute.

Jack looked wearily at him. "Is it?"

John shrugged. "It's early, but some of us don't run on the same schedule as others." He indicated Lily with a rueful grin. "May I, sir?"

"Go ahead," Jack said, using his foot to shove out a chair for him. "Be my guest."

John sat down opposite the General and adjusted the blanket covering Lily carefully, tucking her head beneath his chin and cradling her against his chest before turning his eyes back to the older man. "Everything alright, sir?"

Jack closed his eyes briefly as if the question hurt. "Atlantis is running very smoothly, Sheppard. You and Carter are singing duet perfectly."

"She's an excellent leader. I've got more respect for her than any other commanding officer I've ever had." John's smile came easily. "I wasn't referring to Atlantis."

Jack raised one eyebrow at him. "What were you referring to, Sheppard?"

John hoped O'Neill wouldn't have him court martialed for insubordination for what he was about to say since they weren't on Earth. "I meant other than Atlantis, sir."

"Sheppard, how long have you known me?"

"Several years, sir."

"And how many times in those…several…years, have you known me to talk about anything personal?"

"Never, sir." John rubbed his cheek over the silky black hair covering Lily's head. "But there's always a first time, isn't there."

Giving up, Jack let his shoulders slump. "Sheppard, can I ask you a personal question?"

"Go ahead, sir. But before you do, would you mind holding her so I can get some coffee?" Before Jack could protest, he had deposited Lily neatly into his arms and was heading in the direction of the massive coffee urn set up on a table in the far corner.

Jack looked down at the baby in his arms. She fixed him with a bored look and yawned, making him smile in spite of himself. He touched a finger to her nose, delighted when she wrinkled it and sneezed. Settling her into the crook of his arm, he waited for John to return. When he did, Jack merely looked at him. "You thought that she'd soften me up for you, didn't you?"

"She has a way of getting people to open up," John agreed, his eyes soft as he looked at his daughter. "She owns me already and she can't even talk!"

"She's going to break your heart," Jack predicted. "Think of all the fun you'll have keeping the jarheads away from her."

"I'll just shoot them if they even look at her," John said, shrugging his shoulders. He risked a look at Jack. "Changing the subject, sir?"

"Clever," Jack shot back with a frown. "How did you know, Sheppard?" O'Neill asked abruptly.

John looked at him, puzzled. "Know what, sir?"

"That she was the one? When it was the right time?" Jack fought the urge to pace in frustration and instead concentrated on the now sleeping Lily. "How do you know?"

"When I first met Teyla, I thought she was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen," John said honestly. He was concerned at the look of despair in the general's eyes. " But she always seemed so far away from me, even when she was right there next to me. Sometimes I'd see her looking, catch something in her eyes." He shrugged. "Then she had Torrin." His shrug was casual, but his eyes darkened as he recalled the internal war he'd fought when Teyla had given birth to another man's child.

"Was that hard?"

John ordered himself not to squirm. Being married to Teyla had cured him of skirting around feelings, but he wasn't sure if he was comfortable with talking about this to Jack O'Neill. The man was a general, for God's sake! "It was pretty tough," he said diplomatically, opting not to tell the General that it had been like having his heart ripped out of his chest. "I didn't exactly like the idea of her being tied to another man, but then he was there, and I wasn't going anywhere. Because I loved her. And Torrin." He smiled at the memory. "Right from the first time I held him."

"But how did you know she was for you?" Jack persisted.

"Because when I closed my eyes I still saw her." Throwing caution to the wind, John leaned forward. "I realised that when Teyla had Torrin. I wanted her in my life, even if all I ever got to be was her friend. Sir, if you can't see your life without her, then she's the one for you."

Jack closed his eyes again. "Obvious, am I?"

John regarded him sympathetically. "Only to someone who's been there. Although, to be honest, there's always been questions about you two."

Jack nodded slowly. "I've had some questions myself."

John looked around carefully before he asked the next question, not wanting some eager, wet-behind- he- ers Marine to hear what he was about to say. "Sir, can I ask you a question without you having my commission?" He looked down at Lily, now sleeping peacefully in the General's arms. "I don't want to embarrass myself in front of my daughter!"

A smile bloomed on Jack's features at that, even if it didn't quite reach his dark eyes. "Go on."

"Is she what you want?" John looked Jack straight in the eye as he asked the question. "When you can answer that, you'll know what to do."

* * *

Jennifer yawned as she came into the infirmary and smiled at her night staff. After five years as CMO, she should be used to working all kinds of hours and getting very little sleep. At first, it had seemed like she'd never have the normal life she'd craved as a child. Never have the husband and children her mother had always told her would make her complete.

Years of being a social misfit had cured her of her romantic streak, meaning that the doctor who had arrived on the Atlantis base was a shy, somewhat retiring woman who had come to do a job and had not quite thought that she could actually carry it out.

Jennifer Keller, MD, never took on something she couldn't finish.

Then she'd met a certain Satedan, and her life had changed completely. Her dreams of being the best had been adjusted tnd now she simply wanted to be where he was. It was her dumb luck that he was content to go where she was, she thought with a smile as she picked up the first of the charts she needed to review.

She gazed at the ring on her finger, winking at her in the dimmed light of her office, her smile growing dreamy as she allowed herself to think of her future, just for a moment.

From the door of the small room, Sam watched her and felt the familiar painful ache. It was always there, she thought, absently pressing a hand to her chest where it seemed to hurt the most. Sometimes it was muted, when she was hip deep in mission reports or trying to solve one of the million different admin problems that seemed to crop up on a daily basis. When Rodney and Radek were squabbling over some Ancient technology or other, when Torrin demanded her attention, even when she was training.

But sometimes, it just ached too much. When she looked at Jennifer and her engagement ring and saw her full of the hopes she'd had herself once upon a time. When she saw Teyla, content and settled with her children and her husband. When she looked at Laura Cadman, slowly falling in love with Evan Lorne and not even knowing how much her life was about to change.

When she was alone in her room at night and couldn't sleep.

Sensing that she wasn't alone, Jennifer looked up. Her smile changed from dreamy to welcoming to concerned, all in an instant. "Sam? Are you sick?" Her doctor's eye swept over Atlantis's leader, taking in the pale face and the dark circles under blue eyes.

Jennifer had a fairly concrete idea of who'd put them there. Jack O'Neill was going to suffer for it when he came in for a physical the next time, she thought darkly. Sam's eyes met hers and Jennifer put down the charts, nodding towards the chair.

"What's got you up so early?"

Sam gave her a rueful smile before folding herself into the offered chair. "It's more like what kept me up late."

"Sam, I know that you're the leader of the expedition and all, but whatever is going on, it's more than just routine administrative stuff." Jennifer felt the time for tact was over. She eyeballed Sam sternly. "What's going on?"

Sam hesitated briefly, torn between maintaining her commander-in- hief distance and the need to have a sympathetic female shoulder to cry on. A confidential, sympathetic female shoulder, she told herself.

"I'm a doctor," Jennifer reminded her gently. "If you want, I can put on my doctor's hat and you can tell me. I'll keep it a secret."

"It's not that I don't trust you," Sam began. "It's just difficult for me to talk about."

"I'd prefer to put my friend hat on," Jennifer continued, smiling. "And I'll still keep it to myself if you want me to."

Sam gave a humourless laugh. "It doesn't matter, really. It's a moot point now anyway."

"What is?"

Sam gave up. May as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb, she thought. "Remember a few years ago, when Rodney and you and I were trapped?"

Jennifer nodded. "You told us that there was someone at home who you were seeing. Someone you didn't want to talk about. It was complicated." Comprehension dawned. "He was retiring back then?" Disgust quickly followed. "What the hell took him so long?"

"SG1 and the battle with the Ori, the Replicators. Everything." Sam smiled when Jennifer snorted. "It's okay, Jennifer. I'd have done the same thing."

"Would you?" Jennifer murmured, looking straight at her. "Would you have been able?"

Sam sighed. "I don't know. I'm trained to put the Air Force first and myself second. To follow rules and orders. I like rules and orders!"

"Sam, life isn't always about rules and orders are totally overrated," Jennifer said bluntly. "Rules and orders are great and necessary and all of that, but they don't keep you warm at night." She leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. "They won't hold you when you cry or become your family. At the end, you're still you. And the rules are still there, but is following them worth it if you have nothing to show for it?"

"I hate when you do that," Sam frowned.

"Do what?"

"Get all logical. It's like having Daniel here."

"Daniel makes a hell of a lot of sense," Jennifer said smugly. "And I am considered to be a genius, by anyone's standards." She gave a short laugh. "God, I sound like McKay!"

Sam didn't smile. "I made a fool of myself once. It took me until now to be able to bury it, let alone get over it." Her face tightened. "I won't make that mistake again."

"What happened?" Jennifer asked cautiously. "At Cam's wedding. You mentioned it already. What happened, Sam?"

"_Looking good, Carter." The voice made her jump out of her foolish daydreams and turn to face Jack. She plastered a smile on her face and nodded at him. _

_He was wearing his full dress uniform, like Cam and all the other Marines and Air Force personnel present .Shewas the only exception, being in the wedding party. They Hess blues had always looked good on him, she thought. Shaking her head at her own foolishness, she turned back to where Cam was leading his wife out on the floor for their first dance. His bright blue eyes were sparkling with happiness as he drew the doctor into his arms and slowly circled her around the floor. _

"_They look good together," Jack commented, his eyes resting on the swaying couple. "Happy." _

"_They're in love, " Sam said simply. "When people are in love, they look happy." _

"_Not always." _

_Jack's cryptic comment made Sam look up at him in surprise. The general had been one of the first to call personally to congratulate Cam when he and Carolyn announced their engagement. He had warned Cam that marriage changed a man, for better and worse. She had laughed when Cam relayed the conversation for her and Daniel. _

_For her own part, Sam fervently hoped that her friend would always be as happy as he had looked when Carolyn walked up the aisle on General Landry's arm and slid that ring on his finger. "Is marriage really that bad, sir?" She regretted the question the instant she saw the flash of pain in Jack's dark eyes. "I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to bring up painful memories." _

_He'd smiled sadly at her. "It's okay. Seems like the love bug is in the air for all of you." He nodded towards Daniel, chatting with Vala not far from where they were standing. The archaeologist was gesturing wildly as he spoke with one hand, the other was holding tightly to Vala's. _

"_Those two are just like matches and gasoline," Sam said with a smile. "They just ignite each other with a glance. Or a glare," she added, thinking of all the times Daniel had to be talked out of strangling Vala. _

"_Even Teal'c is trying his hand at this romancing lark." Jack pointed to where Teal'c was holding his hand out to one of the nurses from the infirmary with a charming smile. _

"_He's trying, anyway." Sam laughed. "It's not always easy for him. Teal'c doesn't…talk much." _

"_Indeed," Jack quipped with a bright grin. _

"_Cameron is happy," Sam said, turning back to the couples on the floor. "I've never seen him like this. And if he doesn't make this marriage work, General Landry will have him posted to the farthest reaches of Greenland!" _

_Jack gave in to the nagging question that had been tormenting him since Sam walked up the aisle in front of Carolyn earlier that day. "How about you, Carter? Seeing anyone?" _

_Sam shook her head slowly. "Not right now, sir." She gathered her courage in her hands and prayed it wouldn't go FUBAR on her. "You?" _

"_Not right now," he answered evasively. "Want to dance?" _

"_Sir?" Sam goggled at him. "What?" _

"_Dance, Colonel," Jack repeated patiently. "Like everyone else is doing?" He held out a hand. "Come on, even Marks and Novak are dancing!" _

_Slowly, Sam took his hand. "Okay." She allowed herself to be drawn into his arms and made certain to hold her body away from his. Non-frat regs, she reminded herself. _

"You danced with him," Jennifer persisted when Sam stopped talking and stared into space. "God, Sam, that must have been so hard for you."

"It was," she replied. "I'd been burying it for so long. Cam and Carolyn just looked so happy, so in love. I wanted that for myself, Jen. I just wanted, once time, to see someone look at me the way he looked at her. To belong to someone. Sounds stupid, doesn't it?"

"No." Jennifer thought of Ronon and smiled. "No, it's not stupid. What happened then?"

"_Saw you've put your name in to go back to lead Atlantis again," Jack said casually, looking at her. "Are you going to go if the IOA asks you?" _

"_It's a great opportunity for me," Sam told him. Her stupid heart wouldn't stop kicking. "I think that it's a good chance for me to further my career. And it's not as if anything is keeping me here, is it?" _

"_SG-1?" Jack suggested lightly. "How about them?" _

"_They'll visit," Sam shrugged, not wanting him to see how much it hurt to leave her family behind. "And I'll visit. It'll be hard, but I'll be fine." _

"_Nothing else keeping you, then." Jack tightened his hold on her slightly. "Nothing at all." His voice was infuriatingly casual._

_Sam looked up at him. "Something to say, sir?" _

_Jack stopped dancing when the music stopped to applaud with the rest of the crowd. He looked at her, and then away without answering. _

_Hurt lanced through her, so sharply she breathed in against it. "Excuse me, sir. Thank you for the dance." _

"_Carter, wait." Jack's voice echoed after as she moved blindly towards the door. _

_She was dimly aware of Daniel's searching look, Vala's raised eyebrows and the look of concern on both Teal'c and Cam's faces as she hurried from the room and outside into the evening air. Shivering, she leaned against a tree in the garden and took deep breaths. _

"_Carter, wait. I can make it an order if you want." Irritation laced Jack's voice as he approached her._

"_We're off-duty, sir." _

"_Then why are you still calling me sir all the damn time?" Jack raked a hand through his hair in frustration. "Carter, I – " _

"_Do you still have feelings for me?" The question was out before she could stop it. _

"_What?" _

"_Feelings. Do you have feelings for me still?" She looked at him, unwilling to keep it in the room anymore. Watching the uncertainty in his eyes, she allowed herself, for a split second, to hope. _

"_Yes." The word was so quiet she had to strain to hear it. Emotions swirled through her, clashing against each other violently until she almost felt dizzy._

"_Do you love me?" _

"_Yes." _

"_Then why haven't you told me before now?" she demanded, whirling around and pacing. "We worked together for eight years, and then you left and moved to Washington. And you didn't tell me." _

"_It was never the right time," he said quietly, his eyes never leaving her. "And it's not now either."_

"_Why?" Sam felt tears threatening. "Why is it never the right time? When will it be the right time?"_

_He shook his head helplessly. "Because it isn't. And I don't know when it will be." _

"_I love you." She said the words simply, laying her heart out for him. "I don't remember a time when I didn't. And I want to see if it can happen. You said you were retiring, so why can't we just…" She trailed off suddenly as something clicked. "You're not retiring." _

"_Yes, I am. It's just not the right time." _

"_That's crap," she fired back. "It's never going to be the right time for you." _

"_You were the one who decided to just leave it in the room!" Jack was yelling now. "You said that it was best." _

"_You didn't argue with me." Her voice was flat. "Why didn't you argue with me?" _

"_Carter, don't. Don't do this to yourself." _

"_I told you I loved you," she whispered, appalled. "I told you that, and you just stand there and say it's not the right time?" _

"Ass," Jennifer swore ripely. "He hasn't got a clue what he could have had.""

"No, he doesn't," Sam said. Her eyes were dry. "I told him to leave me alone and he did. When I went back inside, Daniel told me he'd gone."

"_I'm sorry, Sam. He said he had to leave." Sober blue eyes regarded her with a mixture of concern and sympathy. "Are you okay?" _

_Sam shook her head blindly. "No." _

_Daniel immediately drew her into his arms, letting her rest her head on his shoulder. Vala appeared in the doorway of the ballroom, one eyebrow raised questioningly. When Daniel shook his head at her, she nodded and retreated immediately. She would, he knew, keep them free of prying eyes and curious glances until Sam pulled herself together. _

"_It's okay," he soothed as Sam's shoulders shook. "It's alright." _

"_It's not," she sobbed, her hands curling into fists. _

"_But it will be," Daniel murmured, stroking the blonde hair gently. "It won't always hurt like this." _

"He was right. It doesn't most of the time. But sometimes, it still does." Sam looked at Jennifer. "Sometimes, it really does still hurt that much."

"Sam, I don't know what to say," Jennifer admitted. "I didn't realise it was so…hard for you."

"Nobody does," Sam sighed. "And I'd prefer to keep it that way."

Jennifer bit her lip. "Laura is concerned. She's not out to gossip," she hastened to add when Sam's head snapped up. "She just wants to know that you're alright."

"You can tell her what's necessary," Sam said with a grimace. "And no more. I don't want to be the subject of idle base gossip."

"Honey," Jennifer drawled, "we're all the subject of that now and again." She grinned wickedly. "But if you want, I can start a rumour about Rodney and Major Kerr!"

Now Sam did smile. Getting to her feet, she looked at the doctor. "The major wouldn't appreciate that. She swears nothing happened on that mission."

"Rodney would tell a different story. That punch the locals brewed had a pretty potent effect on him."

"Jennifer?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you." Sam paused in the doorway to look back at the doctor.

"Anytime," Jennifer answered with a smile. "Anytime."

* * *

The doorbell pealed and Lorne groaned and raised his head up from his pillow. It chimed insistently again and he heard what sounded like a giggle outside his door. The giggling noise sounded again and he hopped out of bed, pulling on a USAF t-shirt over his sweatpants and padding to the door in his bare feet.

"This better be good," he grumbled, waving his hand over the door crystals and scowling. His scowl immediately turned to surprise when Cara launched herself at him.

"Evan!" The child threw her arms around his legs, snuggling into him until he picked her up. She immediately looped her arms around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. "Hi."

"Hi, princess," he returned, glancing at his watch and grimacing at the early hour. "It's only six hundred hours." And it's my day off, he mentally added. "Where's your Mom?"

"Mama is gone to report for duty," Cara reported. "She's going out of world."

"Off-world," Lorne corrected with a grin. He set Cara on his hip and went to find shoes. "And when your Mama's off- world you're supposed to be where?"

Cara sighed dramatically. "In the nursery with the others," she recited. She turned enormous blue eyes to his. "I wanted to see you."

"That's nice," he answered, melting in spite of himself. "But Sarah will be worried about you."

"She's busy," Cara argued. "Showing Miss Beth around. Miss Beth arrived on the Daedalus with General Landry and General Jack. She's from Iceland."

"Ireland," Lorne corrected absently, having met the pretty teacher and her husband the evening before. He reached for his earpiece and tapped it. "Control? Patch me to the nursery, please."

"This is Beth Houlihan, go ahead."

"Hi, Mrs Houlihan," Lorne greeted her, ignoring Cara's pout as he set her on her feet and sat on the couch. "It's Major Lorne. I've got your escape artist here."

"Wonderful," Beth said calmly. "When will you be bringing her back?"

Lorne looked at Cara's beseeching face and sighed inwardly. "I'll keep her for a while. I promised to show her the Jumper. I'll radio Laura and let her know." He grunted as Cara threw her arms around him and kissed his cheek. "Lorne out."

"Thank you, Major. Eenoy!"

"Evan, can I fly the Jumper," Cara begged, dancing around the room in excitement. "Can we take Mama?"

"She's going off-world, remember?" Lorne handed her some paper and the crayons he kept lying around for Torrin's frequent visits. "Draw me something to put on my wall while I get dressed, ok?"

Cara took the drawing paper obediently and set to work, her tongue sticking out in concentration. When Lorne came back ten minutes later, hair damp from the shower and dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, she handed him her paper triumphantly. "There you go! That's me, and Mama, and that's you!"

Lorne looked at the stick figures. The tallest he presumed to be him, holding hands with a smaller one. Judging by the orange scribbles around its head, it was Laura. His lips twitched as he thought of what she'd say if she saw the picture. The smallest figure had brown spirals surrounding her head and was holding his hand too.

"Do you like it?" Cara asked hesitantly. "I can do another one if you don't like it."

"I love it," he answered with a huge smile. "It's perfect. Why don't you sign your name, like a real artist?"

Her eyes lit up and she painstakingly scribbled 'cARA Xoxo'. "There!"

"Let's go then," he offered, holding out a hand. "After you, Miss Beckett!"

* * *

"John!" Cara spotted John making his way towards Rodney's lab and scampered down the hall like an eager puppy. "Are you going to see Rodney too? Is Lily in that bag?" She pointed to the fabric sling John wore around his shoulders.

"Hello, Cara," John returned with a smile for the child. "Lorne."

"Morning sir," Lorne greeted his CO with a nod. "Going to annoy McKay?"

John smiled wickedly. "I live for it, Major."

"We're going to see how long it takes Rodney to complain," Cara confided, her blue eyes serious. "Evan said that he's always complaining about something and that he needs a good kick in the ass sometimes to keep him from being a damn girl!"

Lorne's jaw dropped as John raised one eyebrow questioningly. " Cara, I didn't tell you that," he stammered, almost feeling Laura's wrath if her pretty daughter started swearing like a seasoned crew dog.

"You said it to Ronon," Cara reminded Lorne with a guileless stare. "I was there. You just forgot that you're not supposed to swear in front of Torrin and me."

Taking pity on his XO, John took Cara's hand in his and suggested they go inside to see Rodney. "And I wouldn't tell your Mom that Lorne here forgot he had two kids with him," he told her. "She might kick his a-"

"Butt!" Lorne cut in immediately. "Right sir?"

"Right," John said with a roll of his eyes. "Good morning Rodney!"

Rodney looked up from the computer he was working on and his eyes widened. "What is this? Father's Day? Take-your-daughter-to-work day?" He pointed at Lily, sleeping soundly in her sling. "And what is that? You look like a girl."

John looked down at the material draped over his shoulders and shrugged. "She likes to be carried. I think it's the heartbeat. Helps her sleep."

"She's growing pretty fast, sir," Lorne commented, leaning in to get a closer look at the now wide-eyed and awake baby, who stared at him without blinking. "She has Teyla's look."

"She's a carbon copy of Sheppard!" Rodney looked at Lorne as if he were crazy. "She's got the same hair, to start with. Poor child. It'll never sit flat. Don't touch that!" He yelled the last at Cara, who was gazing at a strange looking machine in awe. It was beeping intermittently, emitting a strange glow. Every now and again, it would shoot a bubble of light from the opening on top of it. The bubble would float, and then make a curious popping sound several moments later.

Cara jumped backwards in fright, knocking against the table and sending coffee everywhere. Rodney groaned. Cara's lip trembled.

"It's okay, sweetheart," John assured the frightened child. "He's just a nasty old scientist. He didn't mean to bark at you. Want me to lock him in the brig?"

Cara looked at Rodney, wide eyed. "No. But what does that machine do?"

"We don't know yet," Rodney admitted. "Lieutenant Cadman's team found it and sent it back with Dr. Douglas."

"Mama's here?" Cara looked around, confused. "I thought she was off-world."

"No, Dr. Douglas brought it back," Rodney said impatiently. "Don't you listen?"

"Not when you don't make sense," Cara retorted, making Lorne snort with laughter. "Where's Anna?"

"Anna?" It was Rodney's turn to look confused. "Who's Anna?"

"Douglas," John offered, raising his eyes to the heavens. "Dr. Anna Douglas."

"You should know that," Cara informed Rodney loftily. "I know lots of things you don't know about people. Why don't you know what that machine does? And where's Anna?"

"Anna," Rodney emphasized the word with a glare at John, who was trying valiantly not to laugh, "has gone to the bathroom and then she's getting me some coffee, if she knows what's good for her." He swivelled his head around to look at John. "Don't look at that! Ancient devices just seem to either light up or explode around you. Remember P75-412?"

"I do," Lorne chimed in. "Weirdest thing I ever saw. Even you couldn't make that thing work and Colonel Sheppard just looked at it and it went up like…like…"

"A bomb? Well aren't you clever!" Rodney gave him a sarcastic smile.

John moved closer and studied the device carefully. "Looks like a lava lamp," he pronounced. "Maybe that's what it is."

"I doubt that," Rodney said sarcastically. "I highly doubt that." He watched as John picked it up curiously, his eyes widening. "Hey, don't! Put it down! It could be explosive! You have a baby around your neck, for God's sake!"

Lily was watching the lights intently. John smiled indulgently at her. "You like the pretty lights, sweetie? They're pretty, like you are!"

Lorne was just about to comment on his CO's foolish baby talk when the machine started to glow brightly. "Sir, is it supposed to do that?"

"What did you do?" Rodney demanded, hopping off his chair. He blanched when the machine glowed brighter. "Oh God! Shut your eyes, it could damage your retinas!"

Lorne clapped a hand over Cara's eyes hastily, visions of having to explain to Laura just why her daughter was short- ighted all of a sudden dancing in his head. He heard John's muffled curse and opened them. His jaw dropped.

"Rodney," John said menacingly. "What is this machine?" He clamped a hand on the scientist's wrist and squeezed. "What is it?"

Rodney was ashen. He stared over John's head, his mouth opening and closing. No sound came out.

"Why is Lily up there?" Cara asked, her eyes widening. "Evan? Why is Lily up there?"

Lorne could only shake his head. He had no idea.

Lily was floating above their heads, a bubble of light around her. It was like a bad science fiction movie, Lorne thought, feeling a wild urge to laugh. He looked at John, who was watching the bubble intently, following it as it floated around them. "Sir?"

"Those bubbles pop," John said, never taking his eyes off his daughter. "It pops, she falls."

"Rodney," Lorne said, advancing threateningly on the scientist. "Get Lily down from there, or I'll call Ronon."

"I don't know how she got up!" Rodney cried. "I don't know what it's for or how she got up there. And your ATA gene is selective. Isn't it?" He looked accusingly at John. "You did it!"

"That's right, Rodney," John snapped, his hair sticking up wildly as he watched his baby daughter float above his head. "I put my five-week- ld baby in some sort of Ancient traction so I could get whiplash watching her float around!"

"Well it couldn't have been Lorne!" Rodney cried. "His gene doesn't work on all these devices. That's why we call it selective!"

A gurgling noise from Lily made them all look up. And look around at each other again.

"Does she have the gene?" Rodney asked suddenly, his eyes gleaming. "John, the gene! She has it!"

"She's a baby!"

"She's your baby!" Rodney shot back. "And she's Teyla's baby. She probably has all sorts of funky DNA enabling her to do God only knows what!" He flapped his hands at Sheppard. "Get her down!"

"You're not poking needles in my daughter," John ground out. "Lorne, get a ladder."

"Yes, sir." Lorne went to get a ladder from the closet in the corner. "Cara, honey, stand over there."

"A ladder won't work," Cara said, going to stand where he pointed. "She's moving around."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Rodney snapped, relenting when Lorne glared at him. "Sorry. But really, she's four."  
"And a half," Cara told him, glaring at him with dislike. "Rodney, you're mean when you mess up."

As Rodney's jaw dropped, a popping noise was heard and Lily plummeted to the ground. John lunged to catch her, but Rodney beat him to it. With reflexes he'd never displayed, he shot out his arm and caught the falling infant. Her wails filled the air as John snatched her away and cradled her to his chest.

"I caught her," Rodney said, wonder spreading across his face. It was followed by a smug smile. "I caught both of your kids, Sheppard. You owe me!"

"There, baby, it's ok," John said, cuddling the shrieking baby and glaring at Rodney. "You're lucky Teyla isn't here. She'd have shot you!"

"I," Rodney said smugly, "caught her. Before you did!"

"Shut up." John set Lily in her sling and patted her back. "Just shut up." He went to leave the room and looked pointedly at the rest of its occupants. "We won't be telling Teyla about this."

"Yes, sir." Lorne said, poker faced. He took Cara's hand. "It never happened."

"Can we go and say bye to Mama?" Cara asked, her face lighting up. "She's going out of the world again!"

"Off-world," Lorne mouthed to John, who grinned.

"She's going to the Athosian settlement. Teyla and Keller are going too. Something about bridesmaids dresses."

* * *

"Bye, Mama," Cara called from the balcony overlooking the gate as Laura waved and headed through the gate. "Bye, Teyla!"

"Keep an eye on them." Teyla looked up at her husband, who was standing next to Cara and Lorne. "Torrin has ideas about taking Lily to see the fish at the end of the West Pier. I don't want her out in the cold."

"Maybe Rodney's machine can make her float over them like it did this morning!" Cara turned excitedly to John. "Maybe it'll make me fly in the air like Lily did!"

"John?" Teyla's shocked voice rang through the gate room. "What did you do to Lily?"

John's groan could be heard reverberating through the room as he went down to tell his wife what had happened in the lab.

"Oops," Cara said. "It was Rodney's fault," she hollered, running to catch up with John.

The sound of Lorne's laughter mixed with the snickering of the five Marines stationed in the gate room as they watched their CO gesture wildly at the scientist as he filled Teyla in on what had happened in the lab.

"She looks mad," Lorne commented casually, heading towards the steps to see if John needed a little adult backup. He was willing to bet that Cara wouldn't help the matter one little bit.

"Oh, I'm a dead man," Rodney croaked as Teyla cast him a look that would have burned through metal and started towards him. "I am so dead!"

**I hope ye liked it, please let me know as usual if ye did or if ye have any nit picking to do! I don't speak American English too well so ignore any little flaws in that department. **

**Thanks for waiting so patiently, you guys are the best!**


	13. Tick, tick, tick

**Hi guys, sorry it's been a while, exams etc have taken their toll. I've really enjoyed writing these chapters (yes ye are getting two at a time!) and a special mention to my fantastic beta, Asugar, who as always was an inspiration. I'll reply to reviews soon, I promise! As always, let me know what ye think.**

**I meant to post these sooner, but ff was misbehaving. It's all good now! Enjoy!  
**

**Chapter 13. Tick, tick, tick…**

"I can't believe that actually happened," Jennifer laughed as they made their way from the gate to the Athosian settlement and the tent-like dwelling where Marina lived. The Athosian seamstress had promised to make Jennifer's wedding dress and also the bridesmaid's dresses before the wedding.

"I can," Laura said, giggling helplessly at the thought of the panicked scientist. "I'd have loved to see it."

Teyla arched one eyebrow at her.

"I don't mean Lily floating above the ground," Laura corrected immediately. "I mean McKay's face."

"He did catch her," Jennifer reminded Teyla gently. "I'm still not sure how that worked, exactly. But he did catch her."

"John did say that," Teyla conceded. She grinned suddenly. "It's just…fun, I think you could call it…to torture him a little."

"John and Ronon enjoy it," Jennifer added, stepping around a gnarled tree root spreading across her path and bending to tie her shoelace.

"I think everyone does," Laura agreed. "It's just all kinds of fun!" She kept her steps in sync with Teyla's as they went ahead of Jennifer. "Come on, Jen.!"

"I will stop," Teyla mused. "Eventually. When I grow tired of it."

A shriek from Jennifer made them whirl around. Laura instinctively reached for her sidearm, cursing when she realised that she hadn't carried it with her. Beside her, Teyla had tensed instantly, her body crouching into that graceful warrior's stance that Laura had envied so much on her first trip to Atlantis.

"Sorry," Jennifer's muffled voice said from behind a large tree stump. "I'm good."

Teyla's low, rich laughter rang out as Jennifer's head appeared from over the stump, her hair dishevelled, leaves stuck to her cheek. Laura began to laugh. Jennifer scowled as Teyla went to her aid.

"Jennifer, are you okay?" Teyla extended her hand to the other woman and helped her to her feet, doing her best to stop laughing.

"Tripped," was all Jennifer said, a blush spreading across her face. "Sorry."

Laura took one look at her friend and dissolved into laughter again. "Calamity Jen."

"Shut up, Dynamite."

"Does Ronon know that's what we call you?" Laura winked at Teyla. "Does he know he's marrying Calamity Jen?"

Jen sighed. "He and Rodney came up with the name." She shrugged. "He loves me anyway."

Laura groaned and made gagging noises. "Please! Don't make me sick before I even get lunch."

"Like you and Evan aren't all cow eyed around each other," Jennifer retorted, satisfied when Laura immediately quieted. "Hah! That got you to shut up."

Teyla noticed the slight frown on Laura's face and stepped closer to her. "Is everything alright, Laura?"

"It's fine," Laura said, fixing a smile on her face. She spotted the smoke rising from the Athosian camp and pointed, glad to change the subject. "Hey, look, there's the camp."

The tall figure approaching them made Teyla smile and hold out her hand in greeting. "Halling. How are you?"

"Teyla." He touched his forehead to hers. "Welcome."

"Teyla! Teyla is here!" The sound of the children's voices could be heard ringing around the camp. Teyla smiled and produced some chocolate from the bag she carried. The excited chattering quietened as the children took their treats and scurried off to eat them.

Halling shook his head, but his eyes were soft. "I remember when Jinto was as young and eager as they are now."

"How is he?" Jennifer asked immediately. She had a special soft spot for Halling's son, who had expressed a keen interest in her medical skills and was always on hand to carry supplies or help with physicals and vaccinations when she visited the settlement. He often spoke of his desire to be able to help his people through sickness and injury as she did.

Jennifer thought he was a kind-hearted and quick-witted young man, always willing to learn something new or help someone in trouble. She thought he would make a fine doctor, and wished that he could have the same medical training that she had been fortunate enough to receive. It was unfortunately, impossible, so she contented herself with teaching him as best she could about the diseases and cures she had encountered in her time with the Atlantis expedition.

"In love." Halling's wry voice cut into her thoughts, making her blink at him. "He has fallen for Nurin. He claims he will marry her someday."

Laura thought he looked a little sad at the thought. Now that she could understand. The thought of Cara being grown-up and in love was terrifying.

"He's barely eighteen!" Jennifer was horrified. She turned to Laura. "Do I have wrinkles?"

"Wrinkles?"

"I must really be getting old if Jinto is talking about getting married," Jennifer said with a grimace. "Is he here, Halling?"

"He will be along shortly, I expect," Halling answered. "Marina is expecting you. She was delighted with your box of materials, Doctor."

Jennifer fixed him with the look designed to make even the toughest soldier wilt. "You're never going to call me Jennifer, are you?"

"Someday," Halling said with a teasing smile. "Someday, I might."

She sighed. "Thank you for bringing her the materials. I figured that she could use the ones that Laura and Teyla don't want for herself. I think some of the female population back in Atlantis will be demanding her services too."

"It was my pleasure," Halling told her. "You have helped my people in countless ways. We cannot begin to thank you for all the times you have healed us. We are in your debt." He bowed to her, lowering his head so he could touch his forehead to hers.

Touched, Jennifer allowed the contact, knowing that it was a very high mark of respect as well as the traditional greeting and farewell. "Thank you."

"I know you are anxious to get started," Halling said. "I will not delay you any further. Teyla?"

Teyla, who had wandered away from Halling and Jennifer to speak to a group of women, looked up. "Yes?"

"Time to get pretty," Laura said with a quick smile for the child that had offered her a piece of chocolate. "No thank you, sweetheart. You eat it." She was sitting with a group of children that had demanded her attention, learning how to play something she thought was similar to bowling back on earth.

"Come and see me before you leave," Halling was saying to Teyla, who nodded at him. "I wish to hear of Torrin and Lily. And John, of course. He was quite helpful when we were harvesting our crops. His team of marines were greatly appreciated."

Teyla smiled. "He values your friendship," she told him. "It is important to him that my people see him as someone who is as willing to lead them as you or I."

They were outside Marina's tent. Hearing Jennifer's voice inside, Teyla nodded to Halling and went in. The pretty, dark haired young woman was smiling at Jennifer.

"You are radiant, Doctor. You glow with happiness."

"I do, don't I." Jennifer's smile lit up her face as she stood still so Marina could take her measurements. "I'm so happy sometimes I can barely hold it in."

"I remember that feeling," Teyla said. She curled up in one of the chairs set in a corner of the room, running her hands along a bolt of red fabric.

"Me too," Laura said sadly, taking a seat opposite Teyla. "Enjoy it, Jen. It's precious."

"And it is not always lost," Teyla reminded her, reaching across to touch her hand lightly. "Sometimes you get a second chance."

Laura smiled a little at that, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. "Even when you're not sure you're ready for it."

Jennifer's brow furrowed at that statement, but she didn't comment. Instead, she made a mental note to corner Laura later and ask her what she meant by it.

"Everyone deserves a second chance," Teyla said firmly, thinking of Kanaan and John and the chances she'd been given. "And you are no exception, Laura. Why would you think that you are?"

Laura held up another bolt of fabric in a blue colour that reminded her of the sky. "What do you think of this one?" she asked, hoping Teyla wouldn't press the issue. For some reason, she was feeling a little uncomfortable with the direction the conversation was taking.

"Pretty," Jennifer pronounced, looking critically at it. "Teyla, do you like it?"

"I am drawn to bolder colours," Teyla admitted, touching a sample in a rich sapphire colour. "But I will do as I am instructed."

"I want you two to choose," Jennifer insisted. "I already know I'm wearing white!"

"I have the material you sent," Marina cut in softly. She had remained quiet throughout their conversation, carefully measuring Jennifer's petite form and sitting still until the others were ready. "It is beautiful. Do you have something in mind?"

"Yes," Jennifer answered, digging into her bag and pulling out a framed photograph. "I want something like this. That's my mother."

"Your technology is wonderful," Marina said, a little wistfully. "My mother died many seasons ago and I miss her. I have no way of remembering her except in my mind."

"Do you have children?" Laura asked with interest. "Or a husband?"

"Not yet," Marina said shyly. "I am not spoken for." She studied the photograph carefully. "I can make this dress," she said, looking from the photograph to Jennifer. "But it will need to be altered. You are considerably smaller than she is."

"I'll leave it in your capable hands," Jennifer assured her. "I just wanted to use it as a guideline." She smiled sadly at the picture. "She was beautiful, wasn't she?"

Marina laid a hand on her shoulder. "As you will be."

Jennifer blinked back the tears that had risen to her eyes and smiled gratefully at Marina. "Thank you." She peered over to where Laura and Teyla were comparing various colours and materials. "Have you two decided on anything?"

"She's a little smaller than me," Laura declared. "She's only about five-two."

"Nothing wrong with being small," Jennifer protested, coming to sit next to her. "I'm no giant myself!"

"And look what you're marrying," Laura teased. "Six four of muscle!"

"I like tall," Teyla mused, smiling at Jennifer.

"That's because your husband is also half a giant," Laura told her. "I personally prefer a man nearer my own height."

"Like Evan?" Jennifer asked slyly.

Laura's smile faded slightly, "Something like that."

"Laura," Marina interrupted quietly. "Would you mind standing there so I can measure you properly?" She indicated to the spot Jennifer had vacated.

Obediently, Laura hopped up and stood with her arms flung out to the sides. "Like this?"

"Perfect," Marina answered. She looked critically at her. "You are all quite small. It will be easy to make your dresses." She swiftly measured Laura's bust, inseam, waist and hips. "That will do nicely. Thank you. Please excuse me for a moment." Setting her measuring tape down, she disappeared into a little room partitioned off by a curtain. The sound of rustling could be heard filtering through the partition.

Teyla held up a roll of material in a jade green colour. "I think this one is the best I have seen so far. Laura?"

Laura crossed the room and ran her hand over the silky material and immediately nodded her agreement. She looked around as Marina emerged from behind the partition carrying a tray of food and four steaming cups. "Is that tea?"

"It certainly is," Marina smiled, handing her a cup of the sweet tea that the Athosians were famous for.

In fact, John often claimed that it was the Athosian tea that had originally allowed he and Teyla to connect in the first place.

Needless to say, John had a particular weakness for the Athosian tea.

Laura gratefully accepted the hot liquid and took some of the biscuits Marina had carefully laid out on pretty wooden plates. They reminded her of the shortbread cookies that Carson had been so fond of. She shook her head to clear it of the memory of him bringing her tea and cookies when she'd had a cold.

A buzzing in Jennifer's ear made her sigh and tap her earpiece. "Keller here, go ahead." She listened for a moment and closed her eyes. "Damn. Okay, tell them to elevate the leg and wait for me. I'm on my way. Keller out."

"What's up?" Laura inquired, setting her tea on the low table in front of her and looking at Jennifer. "Trouble?" She was suddenly eager to get away from the questioning eyes of her friends.

"Major Kerr's team have returned from their mission and she's managed to get thrown down a ravine by some less-than-happy-locals," Jennifer replied, getting to her feet. She cast an apologetic look at Marina. "I'm so sorry, Marina, I have to get back. The major needs immediate surgery."

Marina waved away her apology. "Think nothing of it. I have your measurements. I will begin today." She gathered the cups and put them back on the tray as she spoke. "Teyla, I have something for you."

Teyla looked at her in surprise. "What is it?"

"It is for Lily," Marina said shyly, coming out from her little kitchen and holding out a wrapped parcel. "I made it myself."

Teyla carefully unwrapped the package, pulling out a small white cotton dress. She held it up to admire the pink embroidered lily on the front. A matching sun hat followed along with a tiny pair of what Jennifer called booties. They were all made of the same soft material and had identical intricate embroidered lilies on the front.

"They are beautiful," Teyla said softly. "They will be perfect for her to wear to the wedding." She touched her forehead to Marina's. "Thank you, Marina."

Marina looked embarrassed at the praise. "I wanted to make her something special," she protested. "It was no trouble."

"It's gorgeous," Laura said admiringly as Teyla tucked the little dress into her bag. "Marina, I have a daughter. She's five. Could you make her something like that if I bring her to visit you?"

Marina nodded enthusiastically. "I would be honoured."

Teyla got to her feet. "I need to see Halling before I leave. Jennifer, go ahead. I will meet you at the gate when I am finished."

Jennifer was already waiting at the door. "Will do. Can you tell Jinto I'm sorry I missed him and I'll see him next time for sure, I promise."

Teyla nodded and left the tent to seek out Halling. Laura followed Jennifer after saying goodbye to Marina and arranging to bring Cara to meet her. She found the doctor saying goodbye to the children who had clustered around her. With smiles and waves, they set off on the short walk back to the gate.

The day was warm and sunny. Laura turned her face up to the light and closed her eyes. She could hear Jennifer behind her, leaves crunching under her boots.

"I wouldn't walk like that," Jennifer teased from behind her. "Sam did that once and went headfirst into a tree. She ended up with two black eyes!"

"I'm a Marine," Laura shot back without opening her eyes. "I'm tougher than those zoomies any day!" When Jennifer didn't respond, Laura sighed and opened her eyes. "Oh all right. Happy now?"

"Absolutely," Jennifer said sweetly. "Laura, are you going to tell me what's going on?"

Laura kept quiet, wondering how to explain to her contented, soon-to-be-married friend just how she was feeling. What could she say without sounding like some sort of fool?

"Laura?" Jennifer prompted, lengthening her strides to catch up to her. "What's wrong?"

Laura only looked wordlessly at her, thoughts swirling around in her head.

_Too much, too fast. We're not officially dating, just casually seeing each other. He's amazing with Cara, just worships her and the feeling is pretty much mutual. And he makes me feel things inside that I'm not sure I'm ready for. _

"Laura?" Jennifer stared at her friend. Laura's face was blank, but her eyes were stormy

"I'm fine," Laura said evenly. "Sorry, I was just thinking of the next mission I have to go on." She attempted a smile, knowing as she did that Jennifer wouldn't be fooled for a minute. And knowing that she wasn't ready to talk about it just yet.

Jennifer sighed heavily. "I told myself to let it go. I figured that you'd talk eventually. But you're not talking. And don't even think of telling me that it's nothing," she added, frowning.

"I'm fine," Laura retorted. "I'm tired, I guess. It's been pretty hectic the last few days, with General O'Neill here."

"For more than you," Jennifer muttered darkly, thinking of Sam's heartbreak.

"What?"

"Nothing." Jennifer shook her head. "And you're changing the subject, Cadman. Don't try to dodge me, I'm a doctor."

Laura opened her mouth to respond, but was saved by the arrival of a breathless Teyla, hurrying to catch up to them.

"I had forgotten how long it has been since I trained properly," Teyla said, catching her breath. "I am...out of shape?"

Jennifer snorted. "Teyla, you had a baby just over five weeks ago. You're not supposed to be in shape. Or that thin." She gestured to Teyla's almost flat stomach. "It's just wrong, the way you can shrink back to normal in only six weeks."

Teyla merely smiled at her and turned to Laura. "Did you find that you regained your figure soon after Cara?"

Laura considered a moment before answering. "I don't really remember," she answered honestly. "It was a pretty blurry time for me. I was barely able to look after her, let alone exercise." She didn't add that Carolyn Lam had threatened her repeatedly with weeks of hospitalisation if she didn't start looking after herself.

"I am sorry," Teyla told her. "I did not mean to upset you."

"It's ok," Laura said. "I had my baby. She took away some of the emptiness."

"But not all of it," Jennifer said thoughtfully.

"No," Laura answered simply. "Not all of it. It was hard, getting up in the middle of the night and looking after her. It was hard being alone."

"You're not alone anymore," Jennifer told her as Teyla dialled the gate. "You have a family here."

Her words echoed the ones Evan had said to her weeks ago when she'd arrived. For some reason, that brought Laura no comfort.

"Ok," Jennifer said briskly, seeing that whatever was bothering Laura, she wasn't going to talk about it just now. "I have surgery to perform. Let's go."

She stepped through the gate, followed by Laura. Teyla took one last look behind her and followed her friends through the wormhole.

* * *

It's been wonderful to see you, sir," Sam told General Landry warmly, smiling at her old CO. "Thank you for your input over the past few days."

They were seated in her office, the desk between them. General Landry had given her a report detailing the findings of the SGC on the inspection and she was damn pleased with her team. They had come through with flying colours, she thought with satisfaction.

"You're doing a fine job here," Hank Landry told her, returning her smile. "I think that the inspection went very well. The civilian population were very enthusiastic in their support of you."

"Thank you, sir."

"And the military side of things is running smoothly, thanks to Sheppard," Landry continued. "He's certainly won over the marines on the base."

"They consider him to be an honorary one of them," Sam chuckled. "I don't think he knows that though. He's an excellent leader, sir, and I don't mind saying that he's one of the best I've got here."

"Anything in particular that makes you say that?" Landry asked with interest.

Sam tapped a finger against her chin as she considered her answer. "Well, sir, there are a number of reasons. He never backs down from a mission, no matter how dangerous or how tough it is. He's saved the asses of probably everyone on this base, including me, at least once. He's an excellent husband and father too, I'm told."

"His record before Atlantis wasn't so clean," Landry said thoughtfully.

"His record before Atlantis doesn't interest me, sir," Sam said. "With all due respect, sir, why are you asking me this?"

"It's part of your job to evaluate the heads of departments," Landry told her without hesitation. "And I wanted to get an overall opinion on Sheppard."  
"Sir, I think it says enough that the marines on this base would follow him into hell and back again," Sam said bluntly. "He's weathered every storm this galaxy has thrown at him and proven himself a lot more than most of the officers I know."

"Thank you, Colonel," Landry folded his hands and sat back in his chair. "That answers all of my questions."

"Glad I could help, sir." She looked over at him, thinking suddenly that she would miss him. She wondered how many more visits he'd make before he retired. "I bet you'll be glad to get home."

"Mitchell is running the place in my absence," Landry said with a chuckle. "I'm willing to bet he's driven my daughter insane at this point."

"She's quite capable of kicking his ass if she needs to, sir," Sam replied. "Are you sure you won't make it back for the wedding?"

"I'm afraid not," Landry told her regretfully. "Jack will be back, though. And Colonel Caldwell will be back in Pegasus for it, I imagine. You'll have plenty backup without an old dog like me around."

"You're always welcome, sir," Sam told him, meaning it. "In any capacity." Her head shot up as Jack tapped on the pane of glass separating them from the control room. "Sir."

Jack watched her surge to her feet as he entered her office and snap to attention. It irked the hell out of him to see her stare straight ahead and not meet his eyes.

"Carter." He inclined his head slightly as she finally looked at him. "As you were." He turned to Landry. "We're ready for lift-off. Or beam-up. Or whatever you call it. "

Landry regarded him with amusement. "You'll never change, Jack." He got to his feet, grinning as Sam shot to hers. He gave her a crisp salute and to her surprise, engulfed her in a hug. "Be good, Carter."

"Will do, sir," she managed around the lump in her throat. "Say hi to SG1 for me." She returned the hug and stepped back so she could return the salute.

"I'll meet you downstairs," Landry said to Jack. He winked at Sam before he strode towards the door. "Take your time."

Jack looked a little sheepishly at Sam. "Hi."

"Was there something you needed, sir?"

Her tone was pure ice, he thought irritably. He hated when she got all polite and distant on him. Narrowing his eyes at her, he shook his head. "No, I just wanted to check in and see how you were doing. With the military inspection and General Landry's personnel performance reviews, I didn't get a chance to talk to you since we got here"

"We've seen each other every day, sir," she replied tightly. "Plenty of time to talk if you wanted to say something."

"We've both been busy." Jack's tone was cool. "And now it's time to go. I was hoping we'd get to talk before I left."

"Always the same," Sam muttered under her breath, wondering at the same time how much deeper he could twist the proverbial knife. "You always leave when it gets hard."

"What's that, Colonel?"

"Nothing, sir." She pasted a fake smile on her face. "Have a safe trip. The Daedalus is very comfortable."

"I'm sure it is," Jack said slowly. "I prefer to take the Apollo myself, but seeing as Ellis just dropped his bags and took off again, I've got no choice there, do I?" He was fidgeting, twisting his hands together, a sure sign that he had something to say and he knew she wouldn't like it. His eyes fell on a framed collage of photographs on her desk. "Nice pictures."

"Thank you, sir." Sam fought the urge to take the frame from him. "I wouldn't have room for all of them, so I made them into one collage." She was rambling again. She cursed herself and clamped her mouth shut. "Sir, is there something I can help you with?"

"There's none of me here." He sounded surprised.

"Excuse me?"

"There's no photographs of me here," he repeated. "What happened to the ones you had of the original SG1?"

"I don't know, sir," she said evenly. "I must have replaced it with something else."

"Right." He was icily polite. "Well, if there's nothing else…"

"Sir, I think we said all we had to say," Sam said, suddenly feeling weary. "I really don't think that anything else at this point would be of any good, for either one of us."  
Jack nodded curtly. He turned and took two steps towards the glass door. Just before he reached it, he turned back. His dark eyes caught hers, the look in them one she remembered as pure determination mixed in with that little bit of stubbornness that was so much a part of his personality.

Sam felt her traitorous heart beat a little faster. Did he have to look so damn good? She forced herself to look blankly at him, , wondering if he'd finally make some sort of move. Some sort of acknowledgement of the feelings he claimed to have.

"I will be back in three weeks, Sam." He didn't bat an eyelid at her shock when he used her first name. "And we _will_ talk about this." He had that steely tone he'd always used when she was about to disagree with him.

"Weddings, conversations and us don't mix so well, sir." She ordered herself not to let the smile droop. "That won't be necessary. We decided. It stays in the room."

Jack cursed vehemently, making her eyebrows shoot up in surprise. "Dammit, Carter, don't look at me like that."

"Yes, sir."

"Things can't stay locked in the damn room forever," he countered, taking a step towards her. "And they won't."

"So you keep saying," she snapped, not backing away from him. "That and "It's not the right time"." She formed her fingers into air quotes, biting her lip when she saw the flash of anger in his eyes. "Sorry, sir. That was uncalled for."

"No, I deserved that one," Jack sighed. He became calm again. "I'm sorry if I hurt you. That was never my intention."

Sam knew that for a man like Jack O'Neill, saying sorry was like changing the way the tide flowed. She nodded. "I know that. But you did. And that's something we both have to live with."

"Excuse me, sir?" Lorne stood at the door, his face carefully blank. "Ma'am. Sorry to interrupt, but they're waiting for you, General."

"Thank you, Major," Jack replied. "You're dismissed." He turned back to Sam, his eyes hard as flint. "We will continue this conversation, Colonel. Expect it."

Sam nodded. "Yes, sir." She gestured towards the door, knowing that the entire expedition would be waiting to see the visitors off. Just keep breathing, she told herself. You can have your meltdown when everyone can't see you. "After you."

He went ahead of her, walking down the steps before he stopped in front of the gate to look at the roomful of marines, airmen and Air Force officers standing at attention in front of him. John Sheppard stood at the front of the group, flanked by Evan Lorne. Sam came to his other side, her shoulders rigid, face tight with tension.

Jack returned the salute immediately and looked expectantly at General Landry, who shook his head and smiled at him. Rolling his eyes at the other man, Jack stepped forward.

"At ease," he ordered, waiting until they complied in perfect unison before continuing. "I'm not going to give a long speech," he began. "Most of you are sick of looking at me, after just a few days." He smiled at the nervous laugh that rippled through the room. "Those of you who just laughed will be court martialled." He said the last part in a light tone, wondering how many of them would take him seriously.

"What the general is trying to say," Landry interrupted swiftly, seeing some of the younger marines' eyes widen, "is that you're all doing a fine job here. Keep up the good work. Heads of departments will have the results of the inspection by tomorrow morning."

Sam smiled at Landry and tapped her earpiece. "Colonel Caldwell, you may beam up your passengers." She looked at Jack and smiled sadly. "They're ready to leave."

The visitors beamed away in flashed of light, leaving her with a new hole in her heart. She took a deep breath and turned back to her team. "Well done, everyone. We made a hell of an impression. My guess is we'll be looking at extra funding and a commendation from the president. I also predict some promotions for a few of you, both civilian and military, before the current tour is up. Dismissed." She strode from the room before anyone could ask her any questions.

It wasn't until she was in the privacy of her own room that the first tear fell. Giving in to her heartbreak, she curled into a ball and wept for the second time in three days.

**And that's chapter 13. On to the next, please!**

* * *


	14. Boom!

**A direct follow on to the last, and ye can thank Asugar for it, she recommended I post both together! **

**Chapter 14. Boom!**

Lorne spotted Laura as she came down the corridor from the nursery after dropping Cara off. He jogged towards her, intending to intercept her. "Laura!" he called after her.

In the week since Generals Landry and O'Neill had left Atlantis, he hadn't had more than five minutes alone with her at a time. She'd been off-world twice and holed up in her lab the rest of the time. When she wasn't working to build a bomb of some kind, she was preoccupied with Cara and the preparations for Jennifer's upcoming wedding.

She'd been quiet, he thought, slowing his step slightly. Something was definitely up. Sure, she played with Cara and completed her missions and she'd had her mission reports on his desk on time, but she wasn't herself. He was starting to become concerned. And more than a little puzzled.

She was wearing her grey uniform, the colour making her look paler than usual. Her hair was neatly tied back and she was carrying a clipboard in one hand. Deep in thought, she didn't appear hear him, so he called out to her again. She stopped and turned towards him.

"Sir," she greeted stiffly, standing to attention as he approached her.

He raised one eyebrow. "We're off-duty, Laura."

"I'm not, sir," she retorted, her tone cool and professional. "Was there something you needed?"

Oh yes, he thought, something was definitely up. She was too polite, too distant. He would simply find out in a reasonable and calm fashion what it was. "Is everything okay?"

"Yes, sir," she replied, still in that same polite tone. Her eyes were carefully blank, her mouth set in a line. "Why do you ask?"

Lorne wondered why his usual reason and logic threatened to fly over the south pier where this woman was concerned. "Did your trip back to the Athosian settlement finish your business there?"

"Not yet, sir," Laura answered. "We need to make another trip before the wedding to pick up the dresses and to make sure they fit."

"At least this time Jen wasn't hauled back here to perform surgery on someone," Lorne said, trying to lighten the atmosphere. Laura was still standing ramrod straight, her body rigid. "At ease, Lieutenant."  
She complied immediately. "Sir, was there something you wanted?" she asked. "It's just that I need to get this back to the lab as soon as possible."

Lorne studied her for a moment. "Actually, I do have something. Come with me, please." He noticed her clench her fists and take a sharp breath before she followed him to the transporter. He pressed a button and the device activated, sending them to the east pier.

"What are you doing?" she asked, looking around her in confusion as they walked out of the transporter and onto the pier.

"Talking to you where there's nobody else to hear," he answered, leaning back against the railing and watching her. She was standing at attention again. He exhaled slowly. "Laura, relax, would you?"

"What did you want to talk to me about, sir?" The wind was working her hair loose from its tidy knot, making strands of it fly around her face.

He fought the urge to reach out and tuck it behind her ears. Instead, he leaned forward and took her hand. "What's wrong, Laura?"

She shook his hand away, noticing the flash of hurt in his eyes. "I'm just busy, sir." When he went to take her hand again, she flinched.

Lorne's eyes narrowed. "What's wrong?" he repeated, folding his arms and moving back to maintain a proper distance between them after her rebuff. "And don't tell me you're just busy. I'm not buying it." He settled back against the railing again and waited for her to answer.

"There's nothing wrong," Laura answered, looking out over the railing at the ocean. "I told you, sir. I'm just busy. I'm also a little tired after my last mission."

"You were there on a glorified babysitting trip," Lorne snorted. "Dr Miller did most of the work. All you had to do was collect some dirt samples."

Laura's eyes flashed with indignation. "I was not just there to collect dirt samples, Evan."

He gave her a triumphant smile. "Now you use my name."

"Don't push me," Laura warned, feeling the precarious hold she had on her self-control begin to fray. "Just don't push me on this." She went to go past him, not caring that he hadn't dismissed her. She'd worry about getting written up later.

"Push you into what?" He caught her arm when she tried to leave, feeling totally bewildered. "What's crawled up your ass, Laura?"

"You're crowding me!" She lashed out at him with the words, her control finally snapping. "You're crowding me with all these feelings and getting inside my head and I can't do it."

"What the hell are you talking about? Lorne looked at her like she'd told him she wanted to pilot a jumper. "I haven't pushed you into anything."

"You have," she accused. "You're always there. When I go off-world, to say goodbye. When I come back from a mission, when Cara wants you to take her in the jumper or around the control room. You're just there, all the time."

"I didn't realise that it was a problem," Lorne replied calmly. "I like spending time with you. I like spending time with Cara." His blue eyes locked on hers. "I like being there."

"Well maybe I don't want you to be there," she snapped. "I have my daughter to think of."

"Don't go there." His eyes darkened with something she couldn't or didn't want to identify. "Don't use Cara as your excuse for this. She's only a kid."

"My kid," Laura tossed back, swiping furiously at the strands of hair getting in her eyes. "She's my daughter, not yours." She began to pace back and forth. "I don't want you getting too involved in her life. You're not her father. It's not your place."

He reeled back as if she'd slapped him. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me." Laura knew she was hurting him, could see it in his eyes, but she couldn't stop. The angry words spilled out of her like lava. "She loves you. It's all Evan this and Evan that. She talks about you constantly and I won't have it."

Lorne told himself she didn't mean to hurt him. It wasn't what she wanted. "I have no idea where you're getting this, Laura. I'm sorry if Cara's bending your ear. I just brought her up in the jumper for a quick spin. I didn't mean to step on your toes." He clamped down on the irritation rising inside. "You gave me the go-ahead, remember?"

"It's not about Cara!" she shouted, her eyes flashing furiously at him.

"Then what the hell is it about, Laura, because I'm flying blind here." Lorne looked at her, struck by the misery in her eyes. It was only adding to his own confusion, making him wonder what was causing her to act like this.

"You kissed me." The words were quiet, making him lean in closer to her to hear them.

"I have. Quite a few times, actually. Not so much in the last few days, but that'll happen when we're both off-world and working." He took her hands in his, rubbing them gently. "Talk to me, Laura. Tell me what's wrong."

"Stop being so damn nice all the time!" She wrenched her hands free of his grasp and glared at him. Him being nice just made her feel worse for hurting him. But God help her, she couldn't stop it. There was too much inside her and trying to analyse it was driving her crazy.

Lorne watched her wrap her arms around herself. Her face was even paler now, so pale he could see the little veins under her skin. Her hair was falling around her face, her eyes dark with a mixture of misery and fear and a hint of anger that tore at him even as it drew him towards her to comfort her.

The tough marine was gone, leaving behind a fragile woman. The one she tried to hide but couldn't. He'd always thought Laura Cadman, the tap dancing Marine, was pretty. Laura Cadman, the woman now in front of him, was beautiful.

He realised, with a jolt not unlike the sudden and painful tingling of a Wraith stunner that he'd fallen in love with a woman who might not ever love him back. What scared the hell out of him was that there was nothing she could do to make him stop loving her. It didn't matter whether she returned the feeling or not. Damn if that wasn't the most terrifying thing he'd ever encountered.

"Laura, I don't know what to say." It hurt, he thought, wondering why the pain surprised him. It wasn't as if they'd committed to anything. "Actually, I do." He straightened up so that he was no longer leaning against the railing.

"I can't do this," she snapped, shoving at him when he came close to her again. "I don't _want_ to do this. I want you to leave me alone."

He inhaled sharply. "Why won't you let me in?"

"In where?" He looked so bewildered and confused. And hurt, she thought, watching the play of emotions across his face.

"Where it matters," he said quietly. "We've been dancing around each other since you got here. Even before."

"Evan."

"Let me finish," he told her firmly. "Before you got here. When I had to give the weekly data bursts to Stargate Command and you'd be on the receiving end. I was drawn to you then, Laura. You were all I could think about. "

Laura closed her eyes, not wanting to look at his face. Images of lying in the infirmary bed, sobbing until she couldn't cry anymore, grieving for Carson, flashed through her mind. A memory of him being there, along with John and Cam, holding her hand tightly in his because there was nothing else he could do and doing nothing at all wasn't an option.

"You were always there," she whispered.

"I wanted to be," he corrected. "I watched you grieve for Carson when Colonel Sheppard told you he was gone. I watched you keel over when you got back from Scotland because you couldn't even function. I saw you when you were pregnant, heard that you'd had Cara." He was unable to stop the flow of words now. "I talked to you about how you were doing, how you were coping. You smiled at me, but it didn't reach your eyes."

"Stop it," she whispered, feeling tears rise. "Don't."

"I can't," he told her. "I kept my mouth shut for long enough." He rubbed a hand across his face. "Laura, I don't want you to feel pressured into anything, but I-"

"Stop it!" Her voice lashed out at him like a whip. "I told you, just leave us alone." She made an attempt to go past him again, to where the transporter would take her to the safety of somewhere he wasn't near her. It was just too much. She didn't know how to handle this wave of…whatever it was…that was battering at her. "I have to go pick up Cara."

"You just dropped her off," Lorne pointed out. He felt like she was blaming him for something and he didn't know what it was. Confusion was pretty much the only thing he could identify. That and a growing sense of anger at her for being so unwilling to see reason. Knowing that anger would get him nowhere, he kept a tight lid on it.

"I have to go and see Colonel Carter and get briefed for my next mission." Laura crossed her arms defiantly and glared at him, daring him to argue.

"Ok." Lorne stared right back. "So what you're saying is that something is up, you're angry with me because you think I'm trying to interfere with Cara and you don't want to deal with any of it right now."

He would have laughed at the situation if it hadn't twisted his gut until he could hardly think straight. "And right now," he continued before she could speak, "you want to be just about anywhere except here talking to me. That about sum it up, Lieutenant?" _Don't push me away, Laura. I can take anything but that._

"Yes sir."_ No. No, it doesn't_. "That sums it up nicely." _Oh God, what are you doing? Stop it. He's going to leave. _

He stared at her for a moment, his expression stony. Only the muscle in his jaw clenching gave any indication that he was feeling anything other than calm.

_She doesn't want you, Evan. Let it go. It'll stop hurting. Mom always said nothing could hurt forever._ Usually, he would have thought that his mother was the epitome of wisdom, but this time, he had to disagree with her. He was pretty sure this would hurt forever. There was only one option left.

"You're dismissed, Lieutenant." He waited for her quiet "yes, sir" and strode away, cursing himself for being a fool.

Laura was left standing alone on the pier, staring after him, wondering why she suddenly felt emptier that she had in years.

_I'm sorry, Evan._

* * *

Teyla came out of the mess hall, Lily in her fabric sling around her torso and Torrin trotting alongside. John followed behind them, chatting amiably with Rodney, who had joined them for lunch. She looked up as Laura came around the corner, carrying a laptop.

"Rodney? I think I've figured out how to use this material that Miller got." She straightened up immediately and snapped to attention as she noticed John, blushing a little. "Afternoon, Sir."

"At ease, Lieutenant," he told her, noticing the pale face and the hollow look in her eyes. One glance at Teyla told him his wife had noticed it too. "What have you got there?"

"She's going to build a bomb," Rodney said, rolling his eyes at the question as he looked over the data Laura had handed to him. "And a big one, by the look of it." He grinned at her, impressed. "Nice one, Cadman."

"Thanks," Laura said with a shrug.

Now John definitely knew something was up. Normally, when the words bomb, explosive, boom and detonate were used around Laura Cadman, she perked up like an addict after a fix. Right now, she looked like her dog had died.

"We need to test it," Laura said to Rodney, who nodded vigorously. "Then I can build around it."

"Can I watch?" Torrin asked excitedly. "I like when things explode!"

"No!" Rodney, Teyla and John all spoke in unison. Torrin's face fell.

"My son, the terrorist," John muttered. "Torrin, you're not watching."

"You are going back to the nursery," Teyla said firmly. "And do not even think of trying to get to the lab to watch. Last time you did it took me a week to get that soot out of your hair."

Torrin looked innocently at her. "It was Rodney's fault."

Teyla laughed when Rodney started to splutter indignantly. "It's always Rodney's fault," she teased. "Now come along. John?" She tipped her face up for his kiss. "See what the matter is," she murmured so only he could hear.

John nodded down at her, pressing his lips to hers again. "See you later." He touched Lily's cheek and tousled Torrin's hair before they walked away. "Come on, you two. Let's hear what you've got to say."

"Well sir, it's like this," Laura began, stopping short when she saw Lorne approaching their position. He spotted her and immediately turned away into the mess hall, avoiding them completely.

"Lieutenant?" John prompted, having seen where her eyes strayed. "Everything alright?"

"Yes, sir." Laura gripped her hands together to stop them trembling. "Sorry, sir. As I was saying, I think that mixing the material we found in the soil with a minute amount of our own C-4 would create an explosive component that would be ten times more powerful and better than C-4 on it's own."

"And we all know how much C-4 rocks her world," Rodney chimed in. He closed his mouth when he saw the look Laura gave him. "Sorry. Continue."

"That's the long and short of it, sir," Laura said to John. "I just need the go-ahead from you and Colonel Carter to test a small amount in a controlled detonation before we start producing it en masse."

"I'm all for it," Rodney interrupted before John could answer. "I think that Dynamite here has something that we could actually use this time."

Laura didn't respond, making John even more suspicious. Something was definitely up. Laura's refusal to rise to McKay's bait combined with her obvious discomfort at the sight of Lorne sent out a stronger signal than the city's distress beacon.

"Okay, do it." He aimed the order at Rodney, who beamed and practically skipped towards the transporter. Laura waited patiently to be dismissed. "Lieutenant, walk with me."

"Yes, sir."

"Everything alright?" He repeated his earlier question as he strolled in the opposite direction to the one Rodney had taken. If Laura wondered why he was going that way, she kept her mouth shut. "You seem a little…distracted."

"I'm sorry, sir. I was up late last night and early this morning." _And I spent all morning arguing with myself like some_ _sort of maniac_. "I wanted to get this report ready."

John raised his eyebrows at her. "You're sure?"

"Yes, sir," she answered. "I'm eager to get this project up and running. It could save our stock of C-4 from running down so fast. And the SGC will love it. "

"Colonel Caldwell will thank you," John said with a smirk. "C4 takes up far too much room on the Daedalus as it is."

"That's good, sir." Laura didn't smile. She felt like she'd been in a spin cycle and had been tossed out in the middle of it. "Is there anything else?"

John stared at her for another moment, wishing Teyla was there. She was so much better at this stuff than he was. "No, that's it. Dismissed." He returned the salute she gave him and watched her walk away. "Teyla?" He tapped his earpiece. "We've got to do some recon."

* * *

Lorne pounded the punching bag in the corner of the gym until he felt sweat dripping into his eyes. He swiped at it angrily and began to punch again, not caring that his arms were aching.

"Got something against that, Major?"

John Sheppard stood in the door, leaning casually against the jamb, hands in his pockets. When Lorne straightened up, he gestured to him to relax and pushed himself away from the doorway, coming to stand behind the punch bag, bolstering it so that Lorne could hit harder.

"No, sir," Lorne managed, delivering a blow to the middle of the bag that sent John back a full two steps. "Not a damn thing."

"Ok," John said slowly, clearly not believing a word his XO was saying. "Then would you care to tell me why you're tearing holes in the equipment?"

"Just keeping in shape, sir," Lorne grunted, but he stepped away from the bag and let his hands drop to his sides.

John picked up a bottle of water that was lying on the floor and tossed it to him.

"Thank you, sir."

"No worries." John shoved his hands in his pockets again, wondering why the Air Force hadn't told him he'd be a relationship counsellor as well as ranking military officer on this expedition.

Lorne took a swig out of the bottle and replaced the cap. "You need me for something, sir?"

"Yes." John kept his tone casual as he followed him towards the big double doors leading to the locker rooms. "I need some help with the duty roster for next month."

"The duty roster?" Lorne looked at him, baffled.

"Yes, Major," John said pointedly. "Remember? That piece of computing genius that tells us all who's on and who isn't and where we're all going?"

"Sir, you can do that with your eyes closed," Lorne protested.

"I can make it an order," John said cheerfully, snagging a towel from the rail in the men's locker room and tossing it to him. "Get cleaned up and report to my office in twenty, Major."

"Yes, sir," Lorne groused, wiping at his face with the towel and heading towards the showers.

John waited until he had walked outside the room before tapping on his earpiece. "Teyla, how's your end coming along?"

"I have just left Laura," Teyla reported. "She did not tell me much, just that they had a disagreement earlier and he was upset by it. She seems angry and hurt. How is Evan?"

"Same," John replied, heading for the control room. "What do you suppose is going on?"

"I am not sure," Teyla admitted, "but it seems serious to have affected them in this manner."

"I knew this would happen when people started shacking up," John grumbled. "And dammit, I don't want either of them miserable. Cadman could blow the city to high heaven if she got pissed enough and Lorne, well, I don't know. He's not usually mad like this."

"What are you doing now?" Teyla asked him. "Are you speaking with him?"

"No, but he's reporting to my office in twenty," John replied. An idea struck him. "Teyla, where are you?"

"In the infirmary," she answered. "I stopped by to visit Major Kerr. Her leg is healing nicely. Why do you ask?"

"Do you have Lily with you?"

"Of course," Teyla said, amused. "I would hardly leave her to float around the city on her own."

"Ha, ha," John said sourly. "I've got an idea. Can you bring her to me?"

* * *

"So," Rodney said gingerly, peering around the partition he'd set up in the far corner of his lab to separate out Laura's work space. "How are things with you?"

Laura didn't look up. "You ask me that every time I come in here." She bent over her work, twisting wires together carefully and clamping off the end of the bunch she was twisting. "And I work here a lot. It's getting old."

"I'm just being nice," Rodney protested, looking injured.

"McKay, you're never nice," Laura snapped. "And I'm trying to build a bomb here. Could you give me a little quiet?"

"Fine," Rodney huffed. "But be careful. You have to get the exact amount of C-4 mixed with the-"

"McKay." The tone with which she said that one word was threatening enough to make him clamp his mouth shut. "Thank you." Laura pressed the wires into the small cube of what Rodney called Cadman's Cocktail and sat back to review her handiwork.

Dr Miller, one of what John called Rodney's underlings, stepped forward timidly. "Lieutenant Cadman?"

"Yes?" Laura snapped. "What?"

"Um, are you going to blow that up in here? Why not outside, on one of the piers?"

"A controlled explosion," Laura ground out between clenched teeth, "is exactly that. An explosion in a controlled environment. Now I don't know about you, Miller, but I don't think the end of the north pier is a controlled environment."

"We have animals in here," Miller said nervously, looking to Rodney for support. "You're endangering them."

Laura looked at him like he'd suggested she run through the halls naked. "And your point is?"

"Cadman knows what she's doing," Rodney interrupted.

"I don't need you to fight for me, Rodney," Laura warned, bristling. "Back off. And you!" She pointed a finger at Miller, who shrank back from her glare. "You can back off too, or I'll strap one of your lab rats to the device."

Miller squeaked in protest and rushed from the lab, leaving Laura staring after him in disgust. She turned to see Rodney gaping at her. "What? They work with you every day! Don't tell me you've never yelled at them, because if you haven't, then whatever drugs you're on, they're working."

"You're terrorising my staff," Rodney whined.

"One man does not a staff make, McKay," Laura snapped. "And if you don't like it, then maybe I'll strap the damn bomb to you and the rat!"

Rodney huffed in indignation. "Whatever happened to the nice Cadman we got back on the Daedalus?"

"Get over it," Laura suggested curtly. "And don't mess with me."

* * *

Lorne knocked on the door of John's office and entered when he heard his CO telling him to. John was sitting at his desk, Lily in his arms. He was listening to his comm., a long-suffering expression on his face. "I said I'd handle it, Rodney. Didn't I?" He rolled his eyes at Lorne. "And I will. Yes, Rodney. Sheppard out."

"Reporting as ordered, sir," Lorne announced, standing in front of him.

"Have a seat," John said, waving at the chair in front of his desk. "Teyla's busy with wedding stuff. I got babysitting duty." He didn't mention that wedding stuff meant Teyla was going to see Jennifer so that they could discuss how to ambush Laura and that babysitting duty meant using his daughter to soften Lorne was part of the plan.

"She's a cute kid, sir." Lorne looked around the office and noticed the stuffed pig in the corner, the pretty blanket that the infirmary staff had given to Lily as a present and the mobile toy with the dangling plastic butterflies that the engineering staff had donated.

John smiled, delighted with the compliment. "She is, isn't she?" Looking smug, he settled Lily more comfortably in the crook of his arm and then fixed Lorne with a steely glare. "Changing the subject won't work, Major."

"Sir, are you using your baby to butter me up?" Lorne stared straight back at him, one eyebrow raised in an unspoken challenge.

"Okay, who are you and what have you done with Major Lorne?" John sat back in his chair, checking to make sure Lily was still settled before continuing. "Look, I've got one very pissed-off explosives expert in a lab full of jumpy engineers. She's even getting to McKay right now."

"I don't know what you're talking about, sir," Lorne said firmly. "We spoke earlier and she assured me she was fine. Just a little tired after her last mission and a little on edge after the inspection by Stargate command."

"I don't think 'on edge' is an accurate assessment," John mused. "She sent Dr Miller running for cover after she threatened to blow up one of his lab rats." The idea made him smirk. "And that was before she threatened to test her new bomb on _Rodney_."

"Since when do you handle the complaints of the engineering department, sir?"" Lorne demanded. "And since when do I get to hear about it?" He cringed as soon as the words came out. Great. Just what he needed. Insubordination to top off his morning.

"Careful, Major," John said evenly, looking down at the baby in his arms. "Lily had started when Lorne's voice rose. "I don't want to have to write you up for scaring my daughter."

"Sorry, sir." Lorne dropped his head into his hands and rested his elbows on his knees. "I guess I'd better go and talk to her."

"Guess you should," John confirmed affably. He held Lily out to Lorne, who looked blankly at him. "Want to borrow her?"

"And tell Teyla I brought her daughter into a room full of the Pegasus version of C-4?" Lorne shook his head. "Thank you, sir, but no thank you."

John nodded and settled Lily in his arms again. "Your call. Dismissed, Major. And good luck," he added as an afterthought.

"Thank you, sir," Lorne answered with a casual salute. He turned and left the room to seek out Laura.

"And that's how Daddy manipulates stubborn soldiers," John said softly to Lily, who yawned, clearly unimpressed with her father's negotiation skills. "That's great, kid. Way to back up your old man." He settled back in his chair and began to rock her gently, relishing the uninterrupted time with his precious daughter.

* * *

The door chimes pealing through the lab made Laura look up from her work, her expression irritated. "The sign says do not enter," she called out. So unless you're blind, stupid or a superior who'll have me court martialled, then stay outside!"

The doors slid back and Lorne cautiously poked his head through the entrance. He bit back a smile as her expression went from irritated to red with embarrassment as she surged to attention. "You were saying, Lieutenant?" When she stared straight ahead without responding, he bristled. "A word, please, Lieutenant." It wasn't a request.

Laura sighed. "Lieutenant" twice inside a minute. That was so not good. "Can it wait a few moments while I get this sample put away, sir?" She sent a glare at the sulky looking scientist across the table from her. "Somebody won't handle the explosives!"

"You threatened to blow up my rats!"

"Man up," Laura ordered crossly. "It's a bunch of rodents!"

"You also threatened to blow up Dr McKay," Miller answered in a sulky tone, glaring back at her.

"Miller, quit whining, for God's sake!" Laura slammed her hands down on the table, making Miller jump and cast a terrified glance at the explosives in front of her. "It's just pathetic!"

Lorne watched the exchange with interest, wondering when exactly Laura had changed from the woman that had arrived on the Daedalus to the in-control, kick-your-ass without-thinking Marine sitting in front of him. It never ceased to amaze him how this woman could go from being soft and vulnerable to being such a rigidly controlled soldier in the time it took a man to blink.

Miller left, muttering about damn Marines and stupid women, earning himself a glare from Lorne and a scathing look from Laura that would have scorched steel.

She finished securing the materials she was testing and stood up. Her obstinate look told Lorne that she still wasn't ready to talk about whatever was bugging her. He decided that he would simply order her to be truthful with him. Being nice earlier had gotten him nowhere fast, so it was time for action. His earlier confusion had changed during the course of the day to him being majorly pissed off despite his best efforts. It was time for answers.

"Outside," was all he said as he gestured towards the door. "I don't want to be in a room full of this crap with an expert who might blow me to hell if I step out of line."

"I would never do that to a superior officer, sir," Laura countered, but she followed him anyway.

"Put this on," Lorne ordered, handing her his jacket as he strode down the quiet corridor. "We're going for a walk.

Laura obediently shoved her arms into the sleeves and put the jacket on, pulling it around her. It was warm from his body and smelled like him, that combination of soap and spicy aftershave balm and that clean, fresh smell that she couldn't describe but thought of as his. She followed him into the transporter, not saying a word until she found herself back in the exact spot he'd left her in earlier.

"We need to talk." Lorne said, turning to her without preamble.

Well aware that she owed him an explanation for her behaviour, both professionally and personally, Laura stayed quiet and waited for him to continue.

"I want you to tell me whatever it is that's got you tied into knots," he told her. "And I want to know now." He didn't smile. "I can make it an order, if that's what you want."

"She wants you to be her daddy," Laura blurted out suddenly. She began to pace rapidly, unable to keep still.

"Who?"

"Cara." Laura closed her eyes for a moment, hearing her daughter's voice in her head.

""_Mama, you loved my Daddy, didn't you?" Cara stopped in her stride and peered up at her mother with anxious blue eyes. They were on their way back to the nursery after having breakfast in the mess. _

"_Of course, baby," At that moment, Laura was struck my how much like Carson their daughter was. She had his blue eyes, his dark brown hair with the curls she had inherited from her paternal grandmother. Laura often thought that Cara had Carson's need to help people too. Cara was always sticking up for the underdog. She'd marched right into General Landry's office at the age of three and demanded that he stop yelling at her Uncle Cam or she'd punch him, right in the nose. "Is everything alright?" _

"_Torrin says he has two daddies," Cara continued quietly. "He has a daddy who died and he has John because John loves his Mama and him and he loves John too so now he has another daddy." _

_Laura blinked, marvelling at how Cara managed to cut to the heart of a matter in one swoop. "What's the matter, sweetie?" _

_Cara hesitated, and then ploughed on. "Can I have another daddy too?"_

_Laura's jaw dropped. "Cara, it's not quite that simple, honey. Torrin didn't just get another daddy, not just like that. John married Teyla. He loves she and Torrin. They agreed to be his parents together." _

"_But you're not old and ugly," Cara protested. "You could easily find somebody to love you just like Teyla did. And get married, like Ronon and Jennifer." _

"_Cara, did someone say something to you?" Laura frowned at her little girl, who was dragging her feet along behind her. "What brought this on?" _

_Cara looked up at her, tears pooling in her blue eyes. "It's going to be Father's Day." _

_Laura's heart ached for her daughter. At home, she could shield her from things like this. Keep her distracted on Father's Day and during the father-daughter races on Sports Day and the absence of Carson for the recitals and Christmas plays and even on her birthday. But sometimes, though she never complained, Laura sometimes felt that Cara missed having a father figure in her life__. _

_Cameron had been fantastic at filling in whenever he could despite his busy work schedule and his marriage, but somehow it just wasn't the same for Cara. She adored her godfather, but even at her tender age, she knew that someday he and Carolyn would have their own children and wouldn't have the same time for her as they did now. _

"_I know," Laura said, recalling the memo that had been circulated throughout Atlantis regarding the subject earlier that day. "I know, baby. Are you okay with that?" _

_Cara shook her head, one tear falling. "I don't have a daddy, Mama. They'll all laugh at me." _

"_No, honey, they won't laugh at you." Laura stopped walking and hunkered down so she could look Cara right in the eye. "I promise you, they won't laugh."_

"_Can Evan be my Daddy?" _

_The simple question made Laura's breath catch in her chest. She could do no more than stare at Cara, wondering where she'd gotten that idea. "What?" _

"_I want Evan to be my Daddy," Cara said, thrusting her jaw forward in a motion Laura knew hid her fear. "He loves me the same as John loves Torrin."_

"_Evan isn't your father, Cara," Laura told her, a little more forcefully than she'd intended. "He's your friend." _

_Cara's lower lip quivered. "He could love you too if you wanted him to. I know he would. He looks at you when you don't know it." _

_Oh God. Laura wrapped her arms around her daughter, feeling her shoulders shake slightly. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry." _

"_Don't you like Evan?" Cara pleaded, pulling back to look at her, big blue eyes brimming with tears. "I saw you kissing him. John kisses Teyla like that. And Jennifer and Ronon kiss like that too." _

"_I'm sorry," Laura repeated, pressing Cara's face into her shoulder again. "But Evan isn't your daddy, Cara. We talked about this. Your daddy had to go to heaven, remember? And I'm here, aren't I?" _

"_I don't want you to be alone forever and ever," Cara said, her voice muffled against Laura's shoulder. "I heard Captain Kelsey talking about you and Evan when she came to pick up Jenna from the nursery. She said that you were afraid to be with anyone else and that you were holding on to a ghost."_

_Laura felt her heart break. She had let this go too far, she thought. And for what? A few stolen kisses that made her forget that she was lonely? Dreams of something she wasn't ready for? How could she have risked the tenuous hold on happiness that she and Cara had found here? _

"_Captain Kelsey doesn't know what she's talking about," Laura said tightly. "Baby, I'm sorry you're finding this so hard, I really am. But I can't marry Evan, and he can't be your daddy." _

"_He would if you let him," Cara repeated. She straightened up and pulled away from her mother, staring up at her with her big blue eyes. "Maybe you're afraid of him." _

"I'm sorry she's finding it so hard," Lorne said, when he could manage to speak past the lump in his throat. "And any man would be crazy not to love her." Himself included, he thought, touched by the little girl's plea.

"She wants you to be her father," Laura repeated, tears pooling in her eyes. "And she thinks that I'm afraid of you."

"Are you?"

"Yes!" Laura cried out. "I'm afraid of how you make me feel. All twisted up inside and not like myself. You make me want all kinds of things I'm not ready to want."

"You're afraid of chemistry?" Lorne cut in. "You think that's all there is between us? Because if you do then you're just plain wrong. I don't know how else to say it."

"It's not just chemistry, and you know it," Laura retorted. "It's more than that. But what if it doesn't work? What if Cara gets attached to you and it doesn't work? It would break her heart."

"You can't keep using her as an excuse for not going after what you want," Lorne snapped. "I'm sorry, but you can't. That's just all kinds of stupid." He couldn't believe that she had so little faith in him and in the relationship they were forging.

"I'm sorry, Evan," Laura said, tears beginning to spill down her cheeks to mingle with the hair falling around her face. "But I can't do this anymore. I think it's best to stop it, whatever it is, before we both get hurt."

He couldn't think. Couldn't speak. Even breathing was a problem. He had been in every situation known to God and man in the Milky Way and here in Pegasus life had thrown him some curveballs he couldn't even have dreamed of. He'd been shot at, stabbed, stunned, beaten and almost eaten by a mutating Wraith virus. All of the above had hurt, some more than others, but nothing had prepared him for the blow that the woman in front of him had just dealt.

"Please don't hurt Cara because of this," Laura pleaded. "She loves you. It would hurt her if you acted differently towards her."

Ok, so he'd been wrong. That just drove the stake deeper. He looked at her, unable to believe she would say that. "Don't you know I'd cut off my own arm before I'd hurt her?" His voice was rough. "Before I'd hurt you?" He gripped both her arms, pulling her closer to him. "Dammit, Laura, don't do this."

"I have to," she said softly. She leaned closer and pressed her lips to his gently, her tears falling on his face. "I'm sorry, Evan. I just don't want either of us to be hurt. Please don't hate me."

Lorne watched as she hurried away, tears streaming down her cheeks. He saw her shoulders shake and took one step forward, his hand outstretched. Knowing it was useless, he let his hands fall to his side and stood there, feeling as if he'd been punched in the gut.

* * *

"Laura?" Jennifer leapt to her feet when she saw her friend at the door of her office." What happened?" Laura's face was leached of colour, but it was the anguish in her eyes and the tears that were still falling that made Jennifer come to her side and wrap her arms around her. "What happened?"

Laura shook her head blindly. "I had to, Jen. I had to do it."

Feeling Laura's shoulders shake, Jennifer held tighter, wondering what had happened to make her crumble like this. "What did you do, Laura?" She ignored the charts scattered across her desk and led her friend to the chair, crouching down in front of her so she could look in her eyes.

Laura sobbed out the story as Jennifer stroked her hair and tried to soothe the tears with another hug. It was all she could do for now.

Nothing she'd learned to earn her medical degree could take away this kind of pain.

* * *

Cara looked out on the pier where she knew Evan would be sitting. When Mama had come to pick her up her eyes had been all red and her face was all blotchy. Jennifer had been with her, and she'd tried to cheer Mama up but it hadn't worked. Right now she was crying in her room. She hadn't even noticed when Cara slipped past her room and into the corridor.

She knew where to go. Evan had shown it to her right before he brought her up in the jumper. It was his painting spot.

She squinted through the window against the rapidly approaching darkness and spotted the lone figure standing on the pier. Evan! She waved her hand over the door access panel the way she'd seen her Mama do and willed it to open. It usually worked, although she hadn't told anyone that yet. That was her secret for now.

She smiled triumphantly as the doors shot open. She trotted along the pier, careful to stay away from the edge as Evan had warned her. The skies were blackening, and it had rained earlier, leaving little puddles in the dents on the ground. Carefully skirting a particularly large pool of water, she approached him and slipped her hand into his, leaning into his side.

He looked down at her, surprised. Cara attempted a smile, but her lips trembled instead. He looked so sad, she thought, wishing that she could help him.

"It's cold," she told him, wishing he would speak. Evan always told her stories and let her sit in his lap. He hugged real tight too. It was different from Uncle Cam or General Landry. It was different from anyone else. "Evan?"

He looked down at her again and smiled. "How did you find me, princess?"

"I knew you would come out here," she told him. Biting her lip, she decided to tell him everything. "Mama's been crying. She cried so hard."

He closed his eyes in a grimace and Cara held her breath, afraid he'd yell at her now. "I'm sorry, baby. Are you okay?"

"I want you to make Mama smile," Cara told him firmly. "You did when we came here on the ship. She stopped crying in the night and everything. She didn't get sad eyes half so much and I want you to go right in there and make her happy again."

"I can't, princess," Evan told her sadly. "She doesn't want to see me right now."

He was pressing a hand to his chest, she noted, as if his heart hurt. Sometimes Mama did that when she looked at a photograph of Daddy, or when it was his birthday. Or Cara's own birthday.

"If you say sorry real well and give her a hug she'll forgive you," Cara told him with all the certainty of someone who'd been there and done that many a time before. "I know she will."

"Not this time," Evan told her. "I'm sorry."

Cara watched as he looked out to sea again. She didn't get why people said that she couldn't understand things just because she was only four and a half. She thought that adults didn't understand anything, not even when it was right there in front of them.

"Are you not going to play with me anymore?"

Evan hauled her up into his arms and held on tight. She snuggled into his shoulder, feeling much better. Evan wouldn't leave her. He still liked her. He wouldn't leave like her Daddy.

"Of course I am," he said, kissing the top of her head. "I promise."

"I love you, Evan."

He breathed in against the ache in his chest. "I love you too, princess."

**I know, I know, I'm cruel and mean, please don't hate me! And a thank you to Asuagar for her input on this one too. Seriously, folks, it wouldn't be near as good without her! More to come soon! **


	15. Missing You

* * *

Hi guys, it's been a while and I am truly sorry for that. I've been mentally busy with work and not had a second to myself! As usual, a massive thanks to Asugar for her input and her advice. I'd be lost without you dear!

**Landwm: Emotional wreck just covers it. I'm wrecked myself writing it! **

**Tripwatcher2: Sorry about making you cry! Hope this one makes you laugh. **

**John's Puddle Jumper: Sorry about that, people are still berating me for breaking them up. I had to do it!Sorry! **

**Oma: What happened to your updates?? Bah indeed. She's a Marine though, Stubborn to the last. She will come around although at this stage I can't tell you when that'll be! **

**Rowena: But it heightens the tension don't you think? You are the world expert at that after all lol! **

**Andromeda Marine: I loved writing that part with Laura and Rodney it was hysterical. I could see it in my head! I'm not sure what plot bunnies are flying around but they seem to like me so far anyway! **

**Dollsnatch: Poor Evan indeed, but he'll be ok I'm far too fond of him to torture him forever. The wedding is being written now I've got great plans for it. Thanks for reading! **

**Sachita: GOod luck with the new school year, I hope it'll be a good one for you. Always nice to hear from you no matter how little or often you check in! I'm flattered that you think I have a way with words, that's the highest compliment you can give me! **

**Olive-girl-92: I'm not so great at the technology part of the storytelling, it eludes me sometimes but thank you. LIly is a little dote I love her! **

**And now, readers, on to the next! **

**Chapter 15. Missing You**

A glance at the alarm clock on his nightstand told Lorne it was 03.27 hours, Atlantis time. He sighed and rolled over onto his back to stare at the ceiling for the eighth night in a row. Absently rubbing at his chest, he let his mind wander for the millionth time since his last encounter with Laura.

"_Please don't hate me."_

It had been eight days, he thought grimly. Eight days since they'd left each other on the balcony, her in tears and him with what felt suspiciously like a broken heart. Eight days of being torn between wanting to see her to ease the ache in his chest and hoping not to see her in case it got worse. Eight days of seeing her in the corridors or the mess hall or walking with Cara to the nursery and almost itching to go and talk to both of them but knowing that he couldn't. Which meant eight days of really going out of his way to avoid them both.

Eight days of knowing looks and whispered questions. The city grapevine was having a field day with this one, almost more than it had when they'd first started seeing each other.

Eight days of running every little encounter they'd ever had through his head, even when he was off-world and not supposed to be thinking of anything but the mission.

Eight days of wondering if she missed him, if Cara missed him. Eight days of missing her and the child that had come to mean so much to him in so short a time.

Eight sleepless nights and early mornings where he went running or sparring or even took his team through yet another survival exercise to try and take his mind off Laura.

Eight days of utterly failing to think of anything but her.

He exhaled and rubbed his stinging eyes. Another glance to the clock told him that three minutes had passed since he'd last looked at the neon display. Sighing, he sat up and reached for a grey cotton t-shirt tossed on the bottom of his bed. He dragged it on and swung his legs out of bed, scrubbing a hand through his hair.

He ran a hand over the sensors that controlled the lights and walked barefoot to the closet in the corner to pull on a pair of sweats over his boxers. Resigning himself to the fact that he wasn't going to get any more sleep that night, he clipped his earpiece on, stuck his feet into running shoes and headed towards the transporter that would take him to his office.

Fighting the urge to press the bright red beacon on the city map that would take him to the family wing, he activated the beam and took himself to the opposite side of the city and the group of offices and rooms that separated the military contingent from the rest of the population.

He passed John Sheppard's office and wondered if his CO was still up. Before he'd gotten married, John had been a notorious night owl and could usually be found prowling the city when everyone else was sleeping. That behaviour had changed dramatically when he'd joined the ranks of the married men on the base.

Lorne's lips curved in a smile as he remembered the day John and Teyla had married. He'd never seen Sheppard so nervous. Wraith, Replicators, Genii - all these John had taken in his stride, but marriage was the only thing Lorne had ever known to shake the man's legendary control.

He ran a hand over the door access panel and stepped into the small room he'd been allocated as his own office when General Landry had informed him that he was second in command to Sheppard on the Atlantis expedition. Office wasn't really an accurate term for the room, he thought ruefully. Dumping ground for files and paper was more like it. Despite the fact that most of the mission reports were computerized, he still had personnel files and records flowing from the filing cabinets in the corner. A framed picture of his nephews sat on the desk along with several more of his parents and his sister and her husband.

He lowered himself into the chair and switched on his computer, rubbing at his eyes again.

_He surveyed the group in front of him with an experienced eye, remembering his own trip out on the spaceship a few weeks before and scanning for the people he knew would settle in and the ones who would need some extra help. The Daedalus had beamed them into the city moments before along with their luggage. _

_The civilians were looking bewildered and a little scared, as usual. He watched a group of scientists take everything in with wide eyes. The medical personnel, easily distinguished by the yellow stripes on their uniforms, were listening attentively to the soft Scottish burr of Carson Beckett. The CMO's easy smile usually made the transition easier to bear. _

_Rodney McKay was talking rapidly to the scientists and engineers, snapping his fingers periodically to regain the attention of those who kept looking around. He rolled his eyes impatiently at their awed expressions. _

_Lorne smiled as he remembered his first encounter with the scientist, not long before. He had accompanied Dr Parrish to a planet and listened to the man rave incessantly about some plant that apparently could survive ridiculously high levels of radiation. Apparently, it should have been an easy mission. Get in, pick a few plants, and get home for dinner. Instead, he had gotten stunned, shot at and slightly sunburned. Rodney had complained the whole time, but Lorne knew that under all the bluster, Rodney had a razor sharp mind and the uncanny ability to pull a last minute solution out of his ass and save the day when needed. _

"_Lorne, are you going to stare at them or get them out of the Gate Room?" John Sheppard put a hand on his hip and eyeballed him. "They can't stay there." _

_Lorne nodded and gave him a salute. "Yes sir." His new CO was nothing like the gossip he'd heard doing the rounds at the SGC. He'd expected a man who was the opposite of what the drill instructors had taught them to be. Instead, he'd found a CO who would go to the wire for any of his insubordinates, Marine, Air Force and civilian. To him, a member of the expedition, whether on his team or not was someone to look out for. In Lorne's eyes, that made him a damn good soldier and a fine commanding officer. _

"_Get to it, Major," Sheppard ordered, a grin spreading across his face. "They'll only get bored otherwise and a room full of bored jarheads can only mean trouble. "_

"_Yes, sir." Lorne headed down the stairs and looked at the clipboard in his hand. "Okay, people, listen up!" _

_The group stood to attention immediately, making him grin. That never got old. "At ease. Welcome to Atlantis, folks. I'm Major Lorne, second-in-command on this base." _

"_Sir?" A female Marine stood straight up, staring straight ahead. "Permission to ask a question?" _

"_And you are?" Lorne raised an eyebrow, thinking that this one was unusually forward. They almost never asked questions. _

"_Cadman, sir. Lieutenant Laura Cadman." _

"_Go ahead, Cadman." _

"_Thank you, sir." She looked at him now, hazel eyes meeting blue ones. "When do we get to go off-world?" _

"_Eager, Lieutenant?" When she nodded, he grinned. "You have to get cleared for off-world activity by the medical staff and undergo some training before you gear up and go through the gate." _

"_Is that in addition to the physical we had before leaving the SGC, sir?" Cadman persisted. _

"_Yes, Cadman," Lorne answered patiently. When she opened her mouth to speak again, he eyed her sternly. "I'm talking, Lieutenant." _

"_Sorry, sir." She blushed and stepped back into line. _

"_Thank you. As I was saying, you need to sign in, find your quarters and be allocated a time for you physical with the Doc. Then you'll need to head to the armory to Sergeant Carney and get your gear." _

_He pointed towards the steps that branched off towards the infirmary. "Dismissed!" _

_Laura Cadman passed him and he put out a hand to stop her. "Lieutenant? A word, please." _

"_Yes, sir." She stopped immediately, turning towards him, her posture ramrod straight. Her face was carefully blank, making him bite back the urge to smile. This one was going to be trouble. __"Why are you here, Cadman?" _

_She blinked once before looking at him, confused. "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand." _

"_Why are you here, Cadman?" Lorne patiently repeated the question, watching her as she considered her answer. He could almost see the wheels turning in her head. "What made you stand out enough to be part of this program?" _

"_Natural talent and charm, sir." Her eyes were dancing with laughter and he couldn't figure out if he should pull her up for being insubordinate or just laugh at her. Deciding it called for a middle ground, he eyeballed her and folded his arms, waiting for her to elaborate._

_She gave him a bright smile that turned to a sigh and muttered something the sounded suspiciously like a dig at flyboy humour. _

"_What was that, Lieutenant?" he asked sharply. He sure as hell wasn't about to put up with that kind of behaviour. What the hell were they teaching them in Marine boot camp these days?_

"_I really wanted to see if the rumours around the SGC were true, sir," Cadman answered, giving him another one of those distracting smiles. _

_. "About what?" He was willing to bet that her white smile got her pretty much whatever she wanted from most people, but not him. _

"_The life sucking aliens," Cadman answered glibly. She laughed at his stunned expression. "I'm an explosives expert, sir. I blow things up, knock them down, whatever you need. Destruction is my middle name." _

_Somehow Lorne didn't find that hard to believe. He could already think of several departments that she would almost certainly set explosions off in. "Well, Lieutenant, you'll have plenty chances to blow things up in this galaxy." _

"_I hope so, sir. No fun here if there isn't!" She was looking directly at him, something he found irritating for some reason he couldn't even begin to explain. _

"_Something you want to ask, Lieutenant?" he asked brusquely. _

"_No, sir." She gave him that blank look again, irking him even further. "Not a thing._

_He gave her a level stare. "Very well.And Lieutenant? A word of advice. When I talk, you don't." _

"_Yes, sir," she shot back crisply. "Understood, sir." _

"_Good. Dismissed." Lorne watched her march away, her head high and frowned. This one was going to be nothing but trouble. He could already feel it. _

* * *

Laura watched Cara sleeping from the doorway of her room. Her daughter sprawled across the bed in her sleep, one leg dangling over the edge. One arm was wrapped around her beloved Mo; the other was tucked under her pillow. She sighed once and tightened her grip on the old monkey, her features relaxing again as she slept.

Careful not to disturb her, Laura gently tucked the dangling limbs into the bed and drew up the covers to keep her warm. She couldn't resist kissing her forehead and smoothing one hand over the tangled brown curls spread across the pillow. Cara sighed again and smiled slightly in her sleep. Just watching her, Laura felt a fierce wave of love wash over her, followed by a surge of the old familiar regret that Carson would never know their daughter.

She kissed Cara's forehead again and resisted the urge to gather her daughter against her and hold on tight, knowing that if she woke the sleeping child there would be trouble. Tiptoeing out of the room, she looked towards her own bedroom and knew that it would be pointless going to bed. She wouldn't sleep. Instead, she grabbed a fleece blanket from the sofa and went to the balcony, dragging one of the easy chairs with her.

She ran her hand over the access panels and stepped outside, wrapping the blanket around her body against the chill. Nights in Atlantis could get cold. Cara was constantly wishing for snow, but so far there didn't seem to be seasons on this planet. Just warm days and nights followed by some cold days and the occasional spell of rain.

She looked across to the tower opposite her, wondering which of the lights winking in the glass windows belonged to Evan. He was awake, she knew. He was most likely over in his office, going over files and reports and trying to keep from thinking. It was a habit he had, when things went wrong. He kept busy until something went right and concentrated on that instead. She had picked up on it the first time they had worked together, but it had been more pronounced since she came back to Atlantis.

Laura rubbed at her eyes, the vague headache she'd had all day gaining strength. It had been eight days since she'd walked away from him on the balcony, leaving him bewildered and broken hearted. Eight days of wondering how he was doing, if he missed her and Cara as much as they missed him.

Trying to avoid him was proving futile, since he was at almost all of the staff meetings she had to go to. He would be at the head of the table, his eyes looking anywhere but at her. When he had to speak to her, it was in the clipped tones of a superior officer to an insubordinate.

His pride and his training made it impossible for him to be anything other than in control and more importantly in command, just as hers had made her hide her shaking hands and the flutters in her stomach whenever he was in the lab or the briefing room. It couldn't hide the pain and confusion in his eyes whenever he looked at her.

Laura resisted the impulse to go inside and raise him on her earpiece. She missed the sound of his voice, that low, deep rumble in her ear when he leaned close to say good morning or that she looked pretty today. She missed seeing him in the Gate Room before she went off-world, missed the way his blue eyes would lock onto hers and the slow smile that would spread across his face as he waved goodbye.

She missed him coming to find her after she got back.

Laura thought that the thing she missed most was the way he would make Cara giggle and shriek with delight when he tickled her or showed her how to draw a picture so that it looked just right. Evan's patience with the little girl knew no bounds and he answered her endless questions with a steady stream of answers just because he wanted to make her happy.

He had always been very patient, she thought, a wry smile tugging at the corners of her mouth in spite of herself. On her first trip out to Atlantis, she'd been fired with enthusiasm for the challenge of being part of an intergalactic expedition. Her first experience in Pegasus had tested her in ways she'd never imagined and it had left her angry and more than a little disillusioned by the expedition as a whole. It had been Evan who had found her, punching the sandbag in the gym until her arms ached, and advised her not to let herself get bitter and twisted.

Even then, he'd been looking out for her, Laura realised sadly. And now she'd hurt him in the one way she never wanted to. She closed her eyes again and let her mind wander backwards.

"_So," Staff Sergeant Jim Kitson teased as he sauntered towards the smoke rising from the village on P6Y-002. "How do you like Atlantis, ma'am?" _

"_Just fine, Kitson," she answered, giving him a sunny smile. "It's a regular paradise." _

_Kitson smirked. "First time off-world, isn't it, ma'am?" _

_Laura nodded. "Sure is!. I've been training for over a month now, and this is the first time I've actually stepped through the gate." She turned to Gunnery Sergeant Karl Wilkes and gave him a questioning look."How long have you been here, Gunny?"_

_Wilkes, a burly African American man with very white teeth, shook his head. "Not long, ma'am. Just over six months now." _

"_That's long enough," Kitson groused, "when you have a wife and kids back home that you can't see or talk to.Damn this place!" He stepped on something sticky and odiferous and cursed vehemently. "Damn this place!"_

_Laura bit back a smile. "Six months is nothing," she told Wilkes. "I was stationed in the SGC for a year and a half and all I got to do was build bombs and test them on deserted planets." _

"_If you girls are done complaining, we're approaching the village," Captain Collin Mason told them. Their team leader was a tall thin man with an air of quiet authority about him that Laura envied. _

"_I resent that, sir," Laura retorted. "Us corps __**girls**__ are more than capable of handling ourselves." She met the eyes of the other men and grinned. _

"_Suck it up, Cadman," was the captain's response. He sent her an answering grin before ordering Wilkes to take point and Laura to cover their six. _

_They advanced into the village; one Teyla had told them would be open to trade. Casting a look around, Laura felt the hairs on her neck stand up. Something wasn't right. There were no people, no noise to speak of. _

"_Something's wrong here," Kitson echoed her thoughts, raising his P-90 and slowly turning in a circle before approaching the first dwelling in his path. He nodded at Laura, who was following behind, her own weapon raised and pointed ahead of her. _

"_Kitson, Cadman, go left," Mason ordered. "Wilkes, you're with me." _

_Laura peered into the little stone house and when she was satisfied that there were no hostiles inside, she went in. Almost immediately, she noticed the bodies lying in the corner. She looked at the shrivelled remains with a mixture of repulsion and curiosity. _

"_We've got three dead here," she called out, going back outside to see Kitson emerging from another hut, his expression mirroring her own. _

"_Captain?" Kitson tapped on his earpiece, shaking his head at her questioning look. "The occupants of these houses are all dead, sir. What's your status?" _

"_If they're not dead, they've deserted the place," Mason answered. "Check for survivors. And for God's sake, watch your backs. I don't want any of us to be food for the Wraith." _

"_Understood, sir." Kitson tapped his earpiece to end the transmission. He eyed Laura, who was still looking around her. "You hear that, ma'am?" _

"_Lead the way," Laura told him, shivering slightly. She ordered herself to get a grip. Marines didn't behave like little girls. And dammit, she was one of the best in the Corps. She could handle vicious aliens with her eyes closed. _

_An hour later, it was clear that the village had been culled. There were no survivors. Laura came out of the last house, feeling sick to her stomach. The occupants had all died at the hands of the Wraith, the feeding marks still evident on some of them. It was the two small bodies in the little room in the corner of the house that had struck her. The children had been killed in the same vicious manner as the adults. _

"_Sick, isn't it," Kitson said quietly. "They don't have any conscience." _

"_They're just kids," Laura whispered. She couldn't tear her eyes from the smaller body. "Just little children. They couldn't have hurt anyone." _

"_It's not about that," Kitson cut in. "They don't see things the way we do." _

"_I'm going to build a bomb," Laura swore. "A really big one. Blast them all to hell." _

_Kitson laughed. "That's the spirit, ma'am. Now can I suggest we get moving? We need to get the hell out of here and-"_

_Laura swung around at the sound of weapons fire coming from outside. Kitson was already heading for the door, calling out to Mason on his comm. She skidded to a halt when she saw the Wraith surrounding Mason and Wilkes, their weapons pointed at the two men. _

_Without hesitating, Laura fired at the creatures, cursing when her ammunition only slowed them down. She heard Mason order them to fall back and get to the gate before they all got killed. Laura shook her head and fired again, grunting in satisfaction as one of them fell to the ground. Kitson immediately joined her, firing repeatedly until he managed to take out another one. _

_Wilkes let out a guttural cry as one of them caught him and began to feed. _

"_Damn it, Kitson, get to the gate," Mason yelled as he fired. "That's an order! You too, Cadman!" _

_Laura was rooted to the ground, unable to move as she watched the Wraith feed on Wilkes. Within seconds, the man was reduced to a shell like the bodies in the village. _

"_Move!" Mason roared the order, firing his Beretta at the Wraith nearest to him and cursed when it merely grimaced and continued towards him._

_Laura hesitated for another moment and turned to follow Kitson as he ran towards the gate. She turned back when she heard the harsh scream coming from where Mason had fallen and jumped as Kitson grabbed her arm. "We have to go back," she yelled at him, trying to wrench free. _

"_Captain ordered us to go,ma'am," Kitson yelled back. "I don't like it either, but we have to go."_

"_I'm telling you to go back," Laura snapped at him. "With Captain Mason out of commission-"_

"_He's not there yet," Kitson tossed back. "Sorry, ma'am. But we have to go."_

"_Sergeant, I'm telling you, we need-"_

"_We need to get to that gate," Kitson snapped. "If we don't go, we'll be killed." _

"_There are only a handful of Wraith left," Laura shouted at him. "We can easily take them." She briefly wondered why the hell she was arguing with a NCO, but realised that his prior experience in Pegasus could save both of them._

"_With all due respect, ma'am, but are you crazy?" Kitson looked as if he could kill her himself. "Do you think that they won't call the darts out here?" _

"_The village is culled, Sergeant," Laura shot back, "There's nothing for them here." _

"_Atlantis, ma'am," Kitson said sharply. "They won't kill us if they can torture us and try to get us to reveal the location of Atlantis. We __**need**__ to go!" _

_With a last look behind her, Laura followed him to the gate. She watched numbly as he dialled the address and reported the situation to Dr Weir. _

"_Come through," the diplomat ordered. "Sergeant, lower the shields." _

_Laura stumbled through the gate after Kitson, her breath heaving in her lungs. "We have to go back," she panted. Spotting John Sheppard, she immediately went to his side. "Sir, we have to go back for them." _

"_Cadman, you're going nowhere," he said firmly. "Carson, get her to the infirmary. Kitson, report." _

"_We can't leave them behind, sir," Laura persisted. _

_John's eyes flashed briefly with what Laura thought was sympathy before his face hardened into a disapproving frown. "Cadman, get to the infirmary. That's an order." _

_Laura snapped to attention immediately, her eyes going hot with temper. "Yes sir!" She turned on her heel and marched down the corridor towards the infirmary, fighting the urge to scream. She heard John demand a sit-rep from Kitson as she turned the corner and leaned against the wall, breathing heavily against the rising temper. It wouldn't be the done thing to lose her cool with a superior. _

_But dammit, nobody got left behind. That was what had been drummed into her, from boot camp to officer training to her first assignment. Nobody got left behind and no Marine came home alone. That was just the way it was. _

_In the infirmary, Carson kept up a steady stream of chatter as he checked her vitals and made sure that the cut on her shoulder didn't need stitches. She did her best to appear polite, because he was so friendly and, in Laura's personal opinion, pretty damn hot, but it was difficult when all she wanted to do was hit the nearest wall. Eventually the urge to lash out got too strong and she hopped off the gurney with what she hoped was a smile. "Thanks, Doc. I'm good now." _

_Ignoring his protests, she hurried out of the room and to her quarters where she swiftly changed out of her BDU's into sweats and a USMC t-shirt and scraped her hair back into a ponytail. She headed towards the gym with long, purposeful strides and headed straight for the punch bag in the corner, thanking whatever gods were looking down on Pegasus that it was empty. _

_A few rounds with the bag might tamp down on some of this raging frustration inside her. How could she have frozen like that? Dammit, she was First Lieutenant Laura Cadman, United States Marine Corps. That alone meant that she should have been ready for whatever the hell this or any other galaxy threw at her. She'd been hand picked by the SGC for the Atlantis expedition, hadn't she? She had proven herself in hand to hand combat as well as acing all of her weapons training and survival exercises, hadn't she? She was an expert in anything that exploded or could be used to cause an explosion, wasn't she? _

_Each question she asked herself was accompanied by a blow to the punching bag that sent vibrations up her arms and into her shoulders. Ignoring the discomfort, she continued to lash out at it, berating herself internally the whole time._

_She was still punching the bag with all her might when Major Lorne came in, carrying a gear bag and accompanied by Ronon and another Marine Laura didn't know. Lorne eyed her quizzically, and turned to say something to the men with him. When they nodded and left the room again, he came towards Laura, stopping just out of her reach. _

"_You get checked out?" When Laura didn't answer, he frowned. "Cadman, are you listening to me?" _

_Laura jabbed at the bag, ignoring the pain that seared through her shoulder. "Yes, sir." _

"_Then act like it," Lorne ordered. He watched as she immediately stood straight up and delivered a crisp salute. "That's better. Now, why aren't you resting?" _

"_I'm not tired, sir." Laura knew she sounded like a surly child and she definitely should have showed the proper respect for a superior officer, but she was well and truly pissed and she couldn't seem to make herself behave!_

"_Really?" Lorne took in the pale face and the dark circles under her eyes with one swift glance. "Because you look like hell, Lieutenant." _

"_Thank you, sir," Laura replied tartly. "Just what I needed to hear." _

_Lorne sighed. "Cadman, I know you're upset over what happened on that planet, but-" _

"_Sir, with all due respect, upset is not what I'm feeling right now." Laura rolled her shoulder joint around, grimacing at the pain. _

"_No," Lorne said quietly. "It isn't. But there isn't a word for it." He looked straight into her eyes. "It won't be the last time we'll lose someone, Cadman." _

"_Doesn't make it right," Laura interrupted. "Sir," she added hastily. _

"_No, it doesn't. But you can't let it make you bitter and twisted either, or we'll be shipping you home in a box and adding to the statistics." _

_Laura tilted her head to the side. "You're good at this, sir." _

"_Good at what, Lieutenant?" _

"_The pep talk," she told him, some of her usual spark returning. "The one that's supposed to bolster us and make us all fired up for the next mission." _

"_If you're not ready for it up here," Lorne tapped her head with his forefinger, "then you'll get killed. Or worse." _

"_What's worse than killed," Laura asked curiously._

"_Broken," Lorne said shortly. "The kind you can't fix. And believe me, Cadman, this place can break you."_

_Laura gave him her brightest grin. "I'm a Marine, sir. Takes more that most to break a Marine." _

_Lorne rolled his eyes, the seriousness replaced by a glint of amusement. "Damn jarheads. Always thinking you're better than the rest of us." _

"_Not at all," Laura told him, her face serious. "I have the highest respect for the Chair Force." Her eyes were twinkling. "Sir." _

"_You're dismissed, Cadman," Lorne growled, but there was no heat in it. "Get some rest." _

"_Yes sir," Laura grinned and gave him a salute. "Thank you, sir." _

She smiled at the memory now, still sitting on her balcony. From that day on, an easy friendship had developed between her and Evan. He would stop to talk to her in the mess hall, or chat to her if they were both in the gym at the same time. He'd been one of the first visitors she'd had when she'd finally escaped from Rodney's body after _that _fiasco.

"Mama?" Cara stood behind her, bleary eyed and barefoot. She was holding Mo under one arm. "Mama, why are you standing here? It's night time. You should be in bed."

Laura had to smile at that, because Cara sounded suspiciously like her when she was trying to get her daughter to sleep. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. Did I wake you?"

"No." Cara shook her head. "I had a bad dream."

Instantly, Laura reached out for her daughter and folded her into the blanket with her. "How about we take this chair here and sit out for a little while?"

Cara nodded sleepily and waited while Laura settled herself into the chair she had brought out with her. She snuggled against her mother contentedly, putting her thumb in her mouth and closing her eyes. With one arm around her monkey, she relaxed and fell asleep, leaving Laura to look out at the ocean, silent tears trickling down her cheeks.

* * *

"Teyla? It's Jennifer. Where are you?"

Teyla looked up as her son came barrelling into her bedroom and jumped on her husband, who was pretending to be asleep. His shrieks of glee when John shot out a hand and began to tickle him echoed through the room.

"It is quite early," Teyla stated calmly, smiling at a gurgling Lily, who was content to lie in her crib and wait to be picked up. "I am in my quarters. Did you wish to speak with me?" She was moving towards the door as she spoke.

"I did," Jennifer told her. "Something needs to be done!"

Teyla smiled again and moved outside the room where she could hear herself think. The giggles coming from Torrin were getting louder and John was starting to make what Torrin called monster noises. "About what?"

"About Laura," Jennifer said bluntly. "She is walking around like…like…well I don't know what, but it's not good. Can you meet me in the mess hall in thirty minutes? She's going to be there with Cara. I should be ready by then. Ronon!" The exasperation was evident, even through the radio.

Teyla laughed. "Jennifer, are you sure that time is sufficient?" She cocked one ear towards the bedroom where the noises were starting to die down.

Jennifer sighed loudly. "Oh please! He was eating my fruit again."

"Are you eating two breakfasts?" Teyla teased. "Remember your wedding dress?"

"Fruit, Teyla," Jennifer sighed. "Fruit is not going to make me fat."

Teyla heard Ronon say something in the background. "What is he saying?" she asked curiously.

Jennifer snorted. "Pretty much the same as what you implied about fitting into a wedding dress. Romance is completely dead. And thirty minutes is perfect. I'll see you then."

Teyla went back into her bedroom, where John was lying on his back, propped against a pillow. Torrin was sprawled on his stomach beside him, talking animatedly to Lily, who was lying on John's bare chest and blinking at him. The picture made her smile and go to sit on John's other side.

"Hey," he greeted her, his face creasing into the smile she loved so much. "What was up with Jen?"

"She wants to talk to us about Laura," Teyla said, smiling when he took her hand in his and brought it to his lips. "And I believe she is bringing Cara to the mess hall. Torrin, perhaps you could get dressed and come with me?"

Torrin kissed his little sister and bounded off the bed happily. "Can I have pancakes for breakfast? Can I have Uncle Rodney's pancakes?" He called the request over his shoulder as he ran from the room to get dressed.

"He always says that Rodney's breakfast tastes better than his," John told his wife with a grin. "I taught him that."

Teyla smiled absently. "Rodney knows that. It is why he gets extra when he knows Torrin will be there."

John narrowed his eyes at her. "What's wrong?"

Teyla looked at him, her head to one side as she considered his question. "I am concerned for Laura," she finally answered. "She is so unhappy, John."

"Lorne isn't any better," John admitted. "I don't know what happened, but for the last week he's been walking around like a zombie. He's not sleeping and I don't know what to say to him."

"Laura is suffering," Teyla said with a frown. "I wish I could help."

"Maybe it's time to do a little interrogation," John suggested. He secured Lily against his chest with one arm and reached the other over to pull Teyla against his side so she could lie beside him, her head resting on his shoulder. "I'll take Lorne, you take Cadman."

"That is not what I was thinking," Teyla said, chuckling as Lily tried to put John's dog tags in her mouth. She gently pried them out of Lily's little fingers. "She's getting so big."

"She's not," John contradicted. He grinned foolishly at the baby, who looked back at him with his own green eyes. "She's Daddy's little girl and she'll be that way till she's eighty. Won't you, sweetheart?" Lily cooed at him, making his grin wider. "See," he added smugly. "Daddy's girl."

Teyla prodded her husband in the ribs. "John, pay attention! I was thinking that maybe Cara and Torrin could be useful in at least getting them to talk. I'm sure Sam would help too, if we asked her."

John frowned. "Why would she – oh!" A smile spread slowly across his face and he leaned down to kiss her gently. "She could order them on a mission together. You're a genius, did I ever tell you that?"

Teyla smiled against his lips, returning the kiss. "Tell me again," she suggested, wrapping her arm around his waist and moving closer to him.

"You're a genius," John repeated, kissing her again, this time deeper. "And I love you." His lips travelled down her neck, making her sigh with pleasure. "A beautiful genius," he added, shifting slightly so he could keep one arm around Lily.

"I have to go to the mess hall," Teyla reminded him, but her tone lacked any conviction. "I have to-"

"Stay a while," John murmured. "I'll order a squadron of marines to take the kids." He pulled back slightly, his eyes burning into hers. "I'll threaten them with scrubbing the piers if they don't."

Teyla laughed at him, but she was tempted. As she opened her mouth to speak, John kissed her again, effectively cutting off her reply. A groan from the doorway made them break off the kiss. Torrin stood there, covering his eyes with one hand.

"Mama, do you have to do that?" he complained. "It's really gross!"

"Someday you'll do it too," John told him, not letting go of his wife. "And I'll remind you of that."

Torrin made gagging sounds and mimed vomiting. "Eewww! Papa, you need to get your head looked at!"

Teyla burst out laughing as she got off the bed and took Lily from a disgruntled John. "Torrin Sheppard, you are spending too much time with Rodney."

"It wasn't Rodney who said that," Torrin informed her as she placed Lily in her sling. "It was Ronon."

"I'm going to kick his ass," John muttered, heaving himself off the bed and going over to kiss his wife and daughter. "And yours too," he added, hefting Torrin into his arms and glaring at him in mock annoyance. "You're a dead man!"

"Bring it on, zoomie," Torrin told him, giggling when John's jaw dropped. "I heard Laura call it to Evan. Is it because you can fly the 302's and she can't?"

"Something like that," John said, making a mental note to educate his son in the finer points of interservice rivalry. "Now get gone, kid. I've got better things to do than talk to you!"

"Love you too," Torrin answered cheerfully, wriggling down and going to stand behind his puzzled mother. He rolled his eyes at John. "Women just don't get it, "he declared, before following Teyla out of the room to the sound of his father's laughter.

* * *

"Sit," Jennifer ordered an exhausted looking Laura as she approached their table, Cara at her side. "How many hours did you sleep for last night?"

"A few," Laura answered evasively, handing Cara her glass of milk and a piece of toast. She looked at the fruit cup she had put on the tray and sighed. She really didn't feel like eating anything.

"Eat it," Jennifer told her sternly. "As your doctor, I'm telling you that you need it. Vitamins and all that. As your friend, I'll force feed you if I have to."

"Really?" Cara asked, wide eyed. "Mamas have to eat fruit too?"

"You bet," Jennifer declared. "And guess what? Doctors have to eat their greens too!"

Cara looked at her mother for confirmation, her eyes like saucers in her head. "Mama, is she the boss of you?"

"It looks like it," Laura sighed, taking a spoon and beginning to eat the fruit. "She's mean, isn't she?"

"No," Cara contradicted. "She's your friend. And she wants you to stop crying like you do in bed at night and start smiling again."

Teyla arrived just in time to hear the end of the sentence. Torrin immediately threw himself into the chair next to Cara and began to pick at her toast, prompting Cara to slap his hand primly and tell him to get his own.

"Torrin," Teyla scolded. "Act like a gentleman!"

"Okay," Torrin replied with a theatrical roll of his eyes. "But Mama, she's such an easy mark!"

"Well God," Jennifer managed as she dissolved into laughter. "Talk about little pitchers and big ears! They hear everything!"

"Everything," Teyla confirmed, recounting Torrin's conversation with John that morning. "He misses nothing."

"Who?" Ronon asked, pulling a chair up beside Jennifer and kissing her soundly. He ignored Cara's giggle and Torrin's groan and grinned at the children. "What are you two up to today?"

"Mama is taking me to get a dress," Cara said shyly. She was still slightly wary around Ronon. Laura thought that it was the Satedan's size and his gravely voice that unnerved her a little.

"I bet you'll be beautiful," Ronon said kindly. He turned to Torrin, who was squirming in his seat, eager to tell his own tale. "Are you going to wear a dress too?"

Torrin looked nauseated at the thought. "No! I'm going in the jumper with Papa and Evan to another planet. Evan!" He leapt from his seat and ran towards Lorne, who had just entered the room.

"Evan!" Cara squealed and followed Torrin, who was holding Lorne around the waist and chattering excitedly. "Where were you?"

"Hey, princess," Lorne greeted her, swinging her up in his arms and settling her on his hip. He hugged her tightly. "I've been working. Where have you been?"

"At school," Cara told him gravely. "We've been very busy getting ready for the wedding. Torrin and I are in it!"

"You are?" Lorne exclaimed, smiling at her enthusiasm. "Do you get to wear a pretty dress?"

"She has to," Torrin declared, taking Lorne's hand and dragging him towards the table. "But I don't! I don't want to get a tie, either."

"Maybe you won't have to," Lorne said, laughing at his disgusted expression. "Maybe you can wear pajamas."

He reached the table and spotted Laura for the first time. "Hey, guys, I have to go," he said gently, not wanting to make a spectacle of himself in front of most of the senior staff. "I'll stop by to see you later," he told Torrin, who nodded and went to pester Rodney and Major Kerr.

"Come and eat with us," Cara begged, wrapping her arms around his neck and squeezing tightly. "Please!"

Lorne felt his heart constrict as he looked into her eager little face. "I can't, honey. Not today."

"Please sit down, sir," Laura said stiffly, getting to her feet. "Cara, sweetheart, I have to go. I'll pick you up from the n nursery a little later, okay?" She refused to meet Lorne's eye, her sleepless and tearful night making it impossible to keep her emotions in check.

"Don't rush off on my account, Lieutenant," Lorne said, equally stiffly. She looked tired, he thought, feeling his heart wrench when she didn't look at him.

Jennifer leapt to her feet. "Ronon, we have to go and see Sam about the wedding," she announced. "Come on."

"No we don't," Ronon said bluntly. He was watching the proceedings with interest despite his fiancée's attempts to gain his attention. "Why do we have to?"

"Because she asked us to," Jennifer said pointedly, giving him a deadly glare. "Come _on_!" She dragged Ronon away from the table with an encouraging smile for Laura. "See you later!"

"I too must go," Teyla said, rising with Lily in her arms. "It is time she was fed. Please excuse me. I must rescue Rodney from Torrin." She held out a hand to Cara. "Perhaps you would like to accompany Torrin and I to the nursery?"

Cara shook her head and tightened her hold on Lorne. "I want to stay with Evan," she said petulantly.

"I'll come by and see you soon," Lorne promised her, prying her arms from around his neck kissing the top of her head gently. "Go with Teyla, princess." He set her down on the ground, wondering inwardly how much more heartbreak he could stand without going slowly mad.

Cara looked up at him, tears pooling in her blue eyes. "Don't you like me anymore?" she asked, her little face bewildered. "You never come and see me or show me how to draw pictures or even to talk to Mama."

"Cara," Laura said warningly. "Leave the major alone. He's busy, sweetie." She saw Cara's eyes flash and her lips tremble, a sure sign that trouble was about to ensue. _Please, baby, don't make this harder than it is already. _

"He's not," Cara retorted angrily. "You made him go away! You made him not love you anymore and now he doesn't love me either. It's all your fault, Mama!" Her voice rose shrilly until she was shouting.

Laura made a small sound of distress, her face turning white. "Cara…"

Cara shook her head and ran towards Teyla, who had retreated slightly when Cara refused to go with her. "I _hate _you!" With that final statement, she ran from the room.

"I will find her," Teyla told Laura when she stepped forward. "Laura, it may be best if you leave her for now." She inclined her head towards the people watching with interest.

Lorne looked at Laura's shattered face and gently took her arm. "Come on," he said quietly. "Too many people here." He led her from the room, beginning to worry when she didn't protest. She didn't speak until they were outside on the nearest balcony, the door locked behind them.

"She's right." Laura looked almost dazed. "It is my fault."

"Laura." Lorne sighed and looked at her. "She's upset. It's not your fault." She looked so broken, he thought, aching for her.

"She misses you," Laura said, her throat closing on the words. _And so do I_. "She asks for you all the time."

"I'm sorry." Lorne watched as she closed her eyes and struggled for composure. He was having a hard time keeping it together himself. All he wanted to do was hold her, but he knew that if he tried she would pull away.

He couldn't stand that a second time.

"I should have handled it better," Laura was saying, her voice shaking. "I'm her mother. I should have known she was unhappy. I should have-"

"You can't know everything," Lorne interrupted. "You can't, Laura, no matter how much you want to." He felt himself starting to get frustrated. She was so damn stubborn all the time. Why couldn't she see that he was in love with her?

"I hurt you," she whispered, her eyes bright with anguish.

"Yes, you did." Lorne didn't see any point in denying it. "It's been a hell of a week, Laura." He was so tired. Between the sleepless nights and the encounter with Cara, he felt raw inside.

"Eight days," she corrected, trying and failing to lighten the tension between them. "I'm sorry, Evan."

"I don't understand why," Lorne blurted out. "I just don't get it, Laura. Why would you think I'd hurt her? Or you?"

"I didn't," she replied instantly. "I know you wouldn't hurt me and you'd never hurt Cara."

"Then tell me why," Lorne said, desperate to understand. "I just want to know why."

"Because I could hurt you," she cried. "I'm not stupid, Evan. Or blind. I see how you are with Cara. I know you love her."

"I do," Lorne said slowly, allowing himself to hope for one moment that she might be open to reasonable discussion. "But I don't want you to feel like I'm using her to get to you."

"It's not like that," Laura said wearily. "I just feel like I'm not going to be what you need. I'm just not good for you. You deserve someone who's better."

"I don't want better," he argued. "I want you. And Cara. I want the chance to find out what we could have together."

"I'm no good for you," she persisted, wringing her hands together. "I can't do it. I can't give my heart away and get it broken again. I can't do that. And I won't. So I'm not what you need."

Lorne didn't know whether he wanted to kiss her or strangle her. "That's my decision to make, Laura, not yours." He was angry and frustrated. "It's up to me to make that choice. And I made it." He began to pace in a small circle. "I don't regret it."

"I'm sorry," she repeated. "I should go and get Cara. She must be so angry."

"You can't keep using her as an excuse for running away from your feelings," Lorne told her angrily. "And don't even bother to deny that you have feelings for me. I can see it. I wasn't doing all the kissing, Laura. And you didn't push me away then." _So stop pushing me away now. _

"I'm sorry."

"If you say you're sorry once more," Lorne threatened, his eyes blazing with frustration. "I swear I'll toss you over the balcony." He swore when she stepped back from him. "The hell with this."

She barely had time to make a sound when he crushed his mouth down on hers, pouring all his frustration into the kiss. It was hot and almost hungry, Laura thought when he released her and she could catch her breath.

"Think about that, Laura," he ordered firmly. "And come and find me when you're done thinking." He paused before he reached the door. "I won't wait forever, Laura. That's something I won't do for any woman, even you."

Laura touched a finger to her lips, her head spinning. Nobody had ever kissed her like that before. It was a new and terrifying feeling. Carson had been sweet and gently. With Evan, his laid back persona hid a passionate nature that she suspected even she hadn't seen yet. "Okay."

"Okay." He unlocked the door and when it opened, disappeared inside the building, feeling somewhat more satisfied than he had in eight days.

* * *

"Mama?" Cara stood at the door to Laura's lab, her face tearstained. She was clutching Ronon's hand tightly.

"Hi, baby," Laura said, getting off her chair and going to the door. "You can't come in here, honey. I'll come outside to you. Miller, can you activate this again when I'm outside?" She pressed the button that deactivated the force field and stepped outside.

Almost immediately, it activated again. Laura nodded her thanks to Miller, who gave her a curt nod in return.

"She wanted to see you," Ronon said gruffly. "Jennifer was patching up one of the Marines."

"Thanks," Laura said gratefully. "I appreciate you bringing her by."

Ronon nodded at her and hunkered down so he could look in Cara's eyes. "Remember what I told you?"

Cara nodded and to Laura's surprise, she threw her arms around Ronon and kissed his bristled cheek. "I remember," she told him. "Bye, Ronon."

"See you later, pipsqueak," he replied with a smile. "Be good."

"Thanks, Ronon," Laura repeated. She turned to Cara and looked curiously at her. "What did Ronon tell you?"

Cara looked up at her with serious blue eyes. "He said that sometimes Mamas don't always get it right. And that when they don't, they need help to remember."

Laura nodded. "They do." She opened her arms to the child. "Come here, baby."

Cara threw herself against Laura, wrapping her arms around her waist and holding on tight, oblivious to the tears of relief stinging her mother's eyes. "I love you, Mama," she said against Laura's stomach. "I didn't mean it when I said I hated you. I'm sorry. Don't hate me, Mama."

"I could never hate you," Laura told her, lifting her up so she could kiss her forehead. "You're the most important thing in the whole wide world to me, you know that?"

"Am I the only thing in the world, Mama?"

Laura felt tears prick her eyes and she nodded, fighting them back. "Yes, baby. You are."

"I hope you don't get lonely when I grow up and get married," Cara told her. "I love you, Mama."

"I love you too, Cara." Laura held her daughter, hoping that Cara wouldn't grow up too fast. She didn't want to think about a time when Cara wouldn't need her anymore.

* * *

"So." John rested his elbows on the table and looked at Teyla. She was making tea, stirring a pot gently and staring into space. "Breakfast didn't go so well?"

She shook her head and sighed. "It did not. Probably because nobody thought that Cara had a temper like that."

John snorted. "She's Cadman's daughter. What did you expect? Serenity?"

Teyla smiled briefly. "She is more like Laura than I had thought."

"Cadman will figure it out," John declared, coming around the table and kissing her neck. He pulled two cups out of the cupboard near the stove and put them on the table behind him. "She's good with explosions and stuff. "

"I hope so." Teyla stopped stirring and turned so she could lean against his back and wrap her arms around his waist. "I wish she were happy, John."

John turned so that she was looking at him. "I know you do. But you have to let her and Lorne figure this one out on their own." He put his arms around her waist, drawing her closer so he could kiss her cheek.

"I hate when you are logical," Teyla grumbled, but she kissed him anyway. "You were happy to interfere earlier. What has changed?"

"Stubborn people generally don't like to be pushed into anything," John pointed out. "They prefer to think that they figured it out on their own."

"That is true," Teyla mused. She attempted to step back from him, but he tightened his hold on her waist.

"Torrin is gone with Lorne," John reminded her, a wicked twinkle in his eye. "And I'm guessing Jennifer won't mind keeping Lily a while either…"

"What are you suggesting?" Teyla asked, her smile matching her husband's.

"A nap," John said huskily, drawing her closer and kissing her slowly. "To make up for the one you didn't have this morning."

* * *

"How was she?" Jennifer asked Ronon anxiously. She looked up from the inventory she was taking. "Was she okay?"

"I think so," Ronon replied. He settled into a chair to watch as she painstakingly counted out boxes of bandages and syringes and noted in her logbook exactly what was there. "Isn't that boring as hell?"

"It's called organization," Jennifer retorted, sticking out her tongue at him. "And yes, it is boring as hell, but I have to get it done before next week."

"What's next week?" Ronon looked puzzled. "The wedding is the week after."

"You're such a male," Jennifer snorted. "Next week we get the dresses and I organise the music and the flowers. And the Daedalus is going to be back in range so I can make sure it has all the stuff I asked for."

"What stuff?"

"A surprise for you," Jennifer teased. "I know how much you love surprises,"

"I hate surprises," Ronon growled.

"I know," she answered. "But this one is a nice surprise."

"It's not a tie, is it?" Ronon looked horrified. "I'm not wearing a tie. Or a shirt."

"Do you plan to wear clothes at all?" Jennifer asked sweetly, "Because there will be children present. Not to mention General O'Neill and Colonel Caldwell. Possibly his wife and kids too, if they're allowed to travel."

"I have got some decent clothing, Jennifer," Ronon told her with a frown. He crossed his arms defiantly. "And I'm not wearing a shirt and tie."

"You can wear what you want," Jennifer replied briskly. "Just don't be late. And no sparring the morning of the wedding. In fact, no sparring from now on."

"Whatever you say." Ronon crossed the room and swung her into his arms, ignoring her protests. "Mrs Ronon Dex." His smile grew wider. "I like the sound of it."

"I'm going to be a wife," Jennifer said, sounding awed by the idea.

"Wife," Ronon repeated. "Not just a wife. My wife." His grip tightened possessively. "I'll always take care of you. I'll always protect you."

She smiled at him. "That works both ways, you know. I'll take care of you too."

Ronon kissed her gently. "I know you will."

"I wish everyone was as happy as we are," Jennifer said as he set her on her feet again so she could continue her inventory.

"They'll figure it out," Ronon said, guessing that she was talking about Lorne and Laura. "You can't make it better for everyone."

"No," Jennifer scowled. "But I can try."

"Sometimes you can't make it okay," Ronon told her firmly. "Don't interfere, Jennifer. It's not your place. Lorne and Laura will sort out their own mess."

"How like a man to say something like that," Jennifer huffed indignantly. "I say it calls for some intervention."

"I say wait until afterl the wedding," Ronon advised her with a knowing smile. "I've heard some of the people here say that a wedding makes another."

Jennifer's eyes lit up. "Ronon, you're a genius!" She tapped her earpiece and called to Teyla. "Ronon just had the best idea!"

Ronon dropped his head in his hands and groaned. He should have kept his mouth shut.

**Well? Like it? Hate it? Should I give up? Let me know!! **

**Eva x**


	16. Flyboys vs Jarheads

**Hi all, it's been ages since I posted, I know and I'm sorry. I had a weeks vacation and it was just fantastic I didn't write a word all week. Hope ye are all keeping well. I was delighted with the reaction to the last chapter. It really helped me cos I was very much afraid that I'd gone flat or something. I'm so glad you are continuing to read. **

**I thought I'd better put in a disclaimer of sorts, seeing as how I don't put it in the front of every chapter. I don't own any of SGA or SG1. I wish I did. I wouldn't be cancelling either of them. I only own Cara and Lily. And some others you have never heard of. Don't sue me! **

**Lady Lioness: What is live journal? It's been mentioned to me before. If someone else is reading my stories then I'm so honoured. It's great to hear positive feedback. I hope you continue to read and review. **

**Tripwatcher2: Yes, we do like to play matchmaker, it's part and parcel of being a woman. And such fun mwah ha hah! **

**John's PuddleJumper: Who do you match with Ronon? Just curious! Glad you like it enough to demand more. Balm to the soul, you know!**

**Olive Girl 92: More coming fast as I can churn it out it's getting to the fun part now! **

**Asugar: Where would I be without you. Nowhere, is the answer to that one. You're the best. **

**Andromeda: The plot bunnies are multiplying by osmosis. It's getting to be fun now. I actually love to come home and start tapping at the keyboard now. **

**Bailey1ak: Evan and Laura are getting there. I promise. It's all coming together nicely for them in the next few chapters. **

**RowenaR: Whee yourself girl! I can't wait to read the new chap you posted on PAS. I adore the latest development in Laura and Evan's relationship. Marriage eh? Genius! **

**Kryan: Thanks so much for the encouragement. I hope you continue to like what I'm posting. **

**Agent Grace: I liked writing that one. I love writing Lorne. He's just HOT! **

**Samcarter2: Here it is! And 17 is written and I'm getting through 18 and 19 too so it should keep coming steadily for a little while. **

**Ok, folks, here it is. And before I send it out to you all, I want to as usual thank my wonderful beta Asugar without whom this one would be full of great gaping holes and inconsistencies. So thank you, Asugar. You are the best! **

**Chapter 16****. Flyboys vs. Jarheads. **

"Mama, is it time for the wedding?" Cara bounced on the balls of her feet and looked impatient. "I want to put on my princess dress!

"The wedding isn't until Saturday," Laura answered patiently. She looked at Cara's reflection in her bedroom mirror. "We're going to collect your princess dress now and then we're coming home to be here when the Daedalus gets here."

"Is General Jack coming?" Cara asked, still bouncing up and down. "Is Uncle Cam coming too? And Daniel? And Vala and Teal'c and Aunt Carolyn?"

"General O'Neill is coming with Colonel Caldwell," Laura answered patiently for what felt like the millionth time as she pulled her hair back into a ponytail and selected a dark grey sweater from the drawer. "Cara, go and get your sweater, honey."

"Can Evan come too?" Cara begged, sensing that her mother was distracted and immediately taking advantage of that.

"Not today," Laura answered quickly, ignoring the little tug at her heart that the mention of Evan brought on. "He's a little busy because the visitors are coming soon, so he and Colonel Sheppard are going to be tied up all day with Colonel Carter helping to get the city ready."

"Can we go and say goodbye to Evan and Torrin before we go?" Cara asked anxiously. "I don't want to go through the gate without saying goodbye. It's the rule, Mama. Torrin said so."

Laura looked at her, finally understanding why Cara was so nervous. "Honey, come sit down for a second." She led her daughter to the bed and pulled her into her lap. "Are you afraid of going through the gate?"

The seamstress had volunteered to come to Atlantis and measure them all in one go due to the flood of requests for time off to go and see Marina for dress fittings. Laura had sent Cara along with some of the other women on the base to be fitted for a dress. On hearing that, Jennifer had immediately suggested that perhaps Cara would like to be a flower girl and wouldn't it be fantastic if Torrin could be a ring bearer.

Cara shook her head furiously at her mother's question. "No! Torrin has been through the gate millions of times. And that was before he was even born. I'm not afraid, Mama. Marines show no fear!"

Laura began to laugh helplessly. "Where on earth did you hear that?"

"From Sergeant Villain," Cara answered solemnly. "He was at the nursery and he was talking to us about what to do if the city gets attacked."

"Sergeant _Villamo_ was right," Laura told her. "But you're not a marine, Cara. And it's okay to be a little scared."

"Were you scared when you came here at first?" Cara looked curiously at her. "Were you, Mama?"

"I was terrified the first time I went through the gate," Laura admitted. She smiled at Cara. "That was back home at the SGC. But now, I can't imagine not doing it."

"Can we press the buttons to make it whoosh?"

"No, that's for Chuck to do," Laura answered. "You wouldn't want him to be unemployed, would you?" She touched a finger to Cara's nose and grinned. "Tell you what. We can radio Teyla and ask her if Torrin would like to come along. Does that sound okay to you?"

Cara nodded enthusiastically and leapt from Laura's lap to grab the earpiece lying on the dresser. She handed it to Laura and waited impatiently while Laura contacted Teyla.

"Great," Laura winked at Cara, who began to bounce in excitement again. "We'll come by and get him in ten minutes." She tapped her earpiece to end the connection and put both her hands on Cara's shoulders to get her to stand still. "Come on, Miss Beckett, let's go get you a dress."

Cara chattered excitedly all the way to Teyla and John's quarters. She was going to look grown up and pretty. And walk beside Torrin. And she was going to have flowers in her hair and get to eat cake and even get to eat cake before Uncle Rodney got his because she was more important than he was.

Before Laura could activate the 'doorbell', the doors parted to reveal an excited Torrin and an amused looking Teyla. John was walking around the little kitchen with a sleeping Lily, murmuring softly to her.

"He is very excited to be going to New Athos," Teyla told Laura.

"Teyla, I'm getting a new dress," Cara told her excitedly, pulling at Teyla's sleeve to get her attention. "I'm going to be as pretty as you and Mama!"

"Nobody's as pretty as Mama," Torrin argued, tugging on Cara's hair. "She's the prettiest lady in the world, right Papa?"

"That's right," John agreed with a wink at his son. "And don't pull Cara's hair. It's not the thing to do until you're older and you want to-"

"John!" Teyla's horrified look mirrored Laura's. "Do not encourage him, please."

"He's my son," John told her with a shrug. "He has the Sheppard reputation to uphold."

Laura arched a brow at him. "Not with my daughter, he doesn't, sir." She looked at where Cara was giving Torrin a sharp elbow to the ribs and laughed. "Maybe the Sheppard charm won't work on her."

"Never fails, Cadman," John said airily. He rocked Lily gently when she began to whimper and grinned at Teyla. "Right, Teyla?"

"Correct," Teyla agreed, rolling her eyes at him. "It never fails."

"Just wait until some flyboy or marine is making eyes at Lily," Laura teased. "See how the Sheppard charm turns deadly then!"

John looked enraged at the thought. He tightened his hold on Lily protectively and glared at the women. "She's not dating until she's thirty. And then it'll be holding hands only."

Laura dissolved into laughter at his fierce look. "Whatever you say, sir." She turned to Torrin and Cara who were still bickering and let out a sharp whistle. "Let's go, troops. Teyla, do you want me to take Lily too?"

Teyla shook her head. "No, she is going to be spending time with her father today. I am helping Jennifer with some invitations." She gave John a stern glare. "And she will not be floating in the air or exposed to any Ancient technology."

John looked wounded. "That was McKay's fault," he whined. "I didn't do it."

"No Ancient technology," Teyla repeated firmly. "Of any kind. And Rodney is not testing her to see if she will activate any more Ancient devices."

"I can open the doors by myself," Cara said proudly. "I have the magic in my hands like Mama."

Laura gaped at her. "Since when?"

"When I went to find Evan," Cara said guiltily. "I wanted it to be a surprise for you but I forgot." She looked disappointed. "I was going to make you breakfast from the mess hall on your birthday."

"That's very considerate of you, sweetheart," Laura said, still shocked by Cara's admission. It had never occurred to her that Cara might have the ancient gene. Carson had had it, of course, but she'd had to be injected with it. She hadn't even thought about Cara's genetic code. It explained a few things, though.

"Is that how you and Torrin manage to sneak out of the nursery when Sarah and Miss Beth aren't looking?" Laura demanded of her daughter. "We'll be having words about that, Miss Beckett."

"As will you and I, Torrin Sheppard," Teyla added, eyeing her squirming son. "Now, say goodbye and be on your way. You will need a bath before our guests arrive later this evening."

"Bye Mama," Torrin called cheerfully, giving her a sloppy kiss on the cheek and waving at John. "Bye Papa."

"See you, kids," John called out. "Cadman, try and keep him out of trouble. He's not happy unless he's in the middle of everything."

"Will do, sir," Laura answered, giving him a casual salute and laughing at his rolled eyes.

"Mama, come on!" Cara was tugging at Laura's sleeve impatiently. "I want to get my dress!"

Laura laughed at Torrin's exaggerated groan and the way he rolled his eyes at the mention of dresses and followed her two charges out the door, waving to John and Teyla as she went.

* * *

Lorne came down the steps of the control room in time to see Laura approach the gate with Torrin and Cara in tow. Torrin was chattering excitedly about how he was going to see Halling and Jinto and play bowls with the other Athosian children. He would teach Cara how to play, he assured her.

Lorne was unable to tear his gaze from Laura. She looked younger somehow in her jeans and dark grey sweater. He was amused to see her wearing her tan combat boots under the jeans. Her hair hung down her back in a long ponytail and she was holding an anxious-looking Cara's hand. The little girl wore jeans and boots like her mother's, but was sporting a pink sweatshirt and pigtails. Lorne thought she looked adorable.

"Pretty picture, aren't they?" John appeared behind him, making him start slightly. He was carrying Lily in her fabric sling around his shoulders. Ronon, who had followed John to the control room, was silently watching the group as Torrin waved at them.

"Dial it up, Chuck," Torrin called, making the assembled adults snort with laughter as he turned and faced the gate.

"He's so like you, it's frightening," Rodney commented from behind the men. He had come into the room just in time to hear Torrin give the order to dial the gate.

John frowned. "People keep saying that like it's a bad thing." He looked on as Chuck finished dialling the gate and the event horizon stabilized.

"That's because one of you is enough of a pain in the ass," Rodney told him with a smirk. He yelped as John thumped him in the arm. "Ow! Do you have to target my arms? I need them, you know. _Somebody_ has to save you people when you screw up!"

"You deserved it," Ronon said bluntly, thumping his other arm. "And you know it." The Satedan met Rodney's glare with one of his own and smiled smugly when the scientist immediately backed down.

Rodney looked at Lorne, who hadn't said a word, but was watching the activity below them. The major's eyes never left Laura, he noticed. They followed her movements as she walked towards the gate, holding one child's hand in each of hers.

Torrin broke away from her, going right to the mouth of the gate and turning back when Laura and Cara didn't immediately follow. Lorne watched as Cara stopped and hesitated, turning a worried little face to her mother's. Laura immediately looked up at the group assembled on the balcony, her brow furrowing into a frown.

Without thinking, Lorne headed down the steps and came to a halt in front of Cara. Rodney whistled under his breath. "This is going to be good," he muttered.

Ronon slapped him on the side of the head. "Shut up, McKay." He watched as Lorne crouched down to Cara and said something to her.

"I can't hear," Rodney complained. "What's he saying?"

"She's afraid to go through the gate," Ronon told them. "But she's too stubborn to admit it."

"Like mother, like daughter," Rodney said airily. "She'll be fine."

Below them, Cara was looking at Lorne, her little face terrified. "Evan, I don't want to be cut into a billion pieces." Her lip was trembling, but she tried valiantly to hide it.

Lorne bit back a smile. "Honey, your Mama goes through the gate, doesn't she?"

"Yes."

"And so do I. And Teyla and Colonel Sheppard go through every day, don't they?"

"Yes," Cara conceded, her face relaxing slightly.

"Well then." Lorne took her hand and squeezed it tightly. He was aware of Laura watching him warily, ready to step in and intercede at a moment's notice. "We stuck together again, didn't we?"

"But Rodney says that nothing in Pegasus is a hundred per cent certain and that anything can malfunction at a moment's notice and that we should always be careful." Cara sounded terrified at the prospect.

"Rodney doesn't know what he's talking about," Lorne told her gently. He stood up and beckoned to Rodney. "McKay, get your ass down here."

"What? Why? What have you done now?" Rodney left the balcony and began to hurry down the stairs, muttering about incompetence.

Lorne waited until Rodney, Ronon and John had come down the stairs and pointed a finger at Rodney. "Tell Cara it's safe to go through the gate."

"What?" Rodney repeated, looking totally confused. "Why?"

"Because you told her that it could malfunction," Lorne accused. "You scared her, McKay." He advanced threateningly towards Rodney as he spoke.

"I did not," Rodney said indignantly. When he saw Lorne's glare, he threw his hands in the air. "Okay, maybe I did, but I didn't think she'd listen!"

"You said that it could malfunction and that we should be prepared," Cara said quietly. "I'm preparing." She looked at Rodney, her blue eyes swimming with tears. "I don't want to break in to pieces and not stick together again."

"Oh for the love of…okay, kid, here it is." Rodney looked at the worried child. "You won't leave a piece of yourself behind. That's only happened once in my memory."

"What?" Cara asked, craning her head to look up at Laura. "Mama, could I really leave a piece of me behind?"

"It's okay, sweetheart." Laura felt that it was time to interrupt the conversation. Torrin was watching, wide-eyed with curiosity and Cara was starting to panic. "We can ask Marina to come here with the dress. You don't have to go through the gate."

"What's the problem," Sam called down from the balcony. "Is there something wrong?"

"We're going to New Athos," Torrin yelled back. "And Cara is afraid to go through the gate!"

"Torrin!" John exclaimed, giving his son a stern glare. "That's not nice."

It was the final straw for Cara. She gave a small cry of fury and launched herself at Torrin, who shrieked and tore through the gate. Without thinking, Cara ran through the event horizon after him. Laura gave a yelp of alarm and sprinted after them through the gate, calling out to the children as she ran.

Lorne looked briefly at his CO. "Sir?"

"Go," John ordered him. "Make sure they got through in one piece – "

"Three actually," Rodney interrupted.

"Three pieces," John corrected, giving Rodney a deadly glare. "Go on."

Lorne nodded and disappeared through the gate after the trio.

* * *

Laura crashed through the gate on the other side and skidded to a halt at the base of the steps, calling out to Cara and Torrin as she looked around wildly. She felt a presence behind her and let out a shriek as she turned and saw Lorne come to a halt behind her. "Don't _do_ that!"

"What?" He looked at her. "Colonel Sheppard sent me through to make sure you got here in one piece. Where are the kids?"

"I don't know," Laura shot back. "Cara! Torrin?" She could hear the shrieks of outrage ringing through the air and guessed that the children weren't that far from where she was.

"Here, Mama!" Cara popped out from behind a tree stump. Her face was dirty and one of her pigtails was loose, but she was grinning broadly. She was holding Torrin by the ear and yanked hard as he opened his mouth to speak. "Say sorry."

Lorne couldn't help it. He began to laugh. "She's your daughter for sure," he managed between bouts of laughter. "Just like you in every way."

Laura narrowed her eyes at him and quick as a whip, shot out a hand and gripped his ear, twisting painfully. "Say sorry," she demanded, forgetting for a moment that she was supposed to be keeping her distance from him.

"Let go, Cadman," Lorne ordered, trying and failing to get a grip on her. "Ow! I can make it an order."

Laura gave him her sweetest smile. "Try it."

"Insubordination is - ow! Lieutenant, you're pushing it!" Lorne made a last attempt to grab her around the waist and finally succeeded. He twisted so that he was holding her against him, her back to his chest. "Say sorry," he said in her ear.

Laura shivered at the sensation of his breath on her neck. The memory of that kiss on the balcony was flashing through her mind. She forgot all about the watching children, forgot that they were off-world and that they should really be more vigilant, even if they were at the Athosian settlement and leaned back against him. "Not a chance," she whispered. "Sir."

Torrin giggled and Lorne released her abruptly. "Truce?" He watched as her eyes grew shuttered and her face, slightly flushed from their antics, went pale again. Turning his attention to the two children in front of them, he planted his hands on his hips. "Front and center, you two."

Cara stepped forward, all ready to do battle. He silenced her with a look and folded his arms. "Torrin, you're older than Cara-"

"But she hit first!" Torrin was indignant. His dark hair was sticking out at the back and his clothes were dirty, like Cara's. He looked just like his mother, Laura thought. She waited to see what Lorne would say.

"She's a girl," Lorne said pointedly. "And she's younger than you. What do you think your Mama would say if she was here?"

"To act like a gentleman," Torrin mumbled.

"And you, young lady," Lorne continued, eyeing Cara, who went from smug to contrite in seconds. "You should never run through the gate when you don't know what's on the other side."

"Torrin went first," Cara argued. She caught her mother's eye and fell silent. "Sorry, Evan."

"That's okay," Lorne said, relenting when he saw her face. "Now, I'm going to head back and get some work done. You two behave for Laura, or I'll put you to work scrubbing the toilets with a toothbrush!"

Torrin howled with laughter as Cara gasped. "You wouldn't!"

"I would," Lorne returned, winking at Laura, who smiled at him. "Now, you two scout out the area, but wait until Laura's ready before you move out."

"Yes, sir," Cara said immediately.

"Yes, sir," Torrin echoed, not to be outdone. He turned and immediately began to look around him. Cara turned back to Lorne and threw her arms around his legs, hugging tightly. "Evan?"

He gently disentangled himself from her arms and crouched down so he could look straight at her. "Yes?"

Cara leaned in close to him and whispered something in his ear. Laura watched as he closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around her daughter, whispering a reply in her ear. Cara kissed his cheek and ran to catch up with Torrin, who had made his way to the edge of the clearing. "I better head back," Lorne told her, looking at the gate and not at her. "I've got paperwork to do."

"What did she say to you?" Laura asked, desperately wanting to reach out and touch him. She seemed to react that way around him since that kiss on the balcony earlier in the week. "When she whispered, what did she say?"

Lorne rubbed a hand over his eyes. "She asked me if it was okay for her to love me as her second daddy." When Laura went white, he shot out a hand to steady her. "Laura, I didn't mention it to her. I didn't think she would ask that."

"What did you say?" Laura heard herself ask, feeling the now familiar mixture of panic and confusion spread through her.

"I told her that I would be proud to be her father," Lorne said wearily. "Laura, she's confused. She sees Torrin with Colonel Sheppard and she doesn't know how else to react. Things are so different in Atlantis, maybe she's confused about the family situations here."

"I brought her to Atlantis," Laura said shakily. "I thought that she'd be okay here. But maybe I was wrong." She wrung her hands together. "I think maybe it's time to consider going back home to the SGC."

Lorne stared at her in horror. "What? You can't leave Atlantis." _You can't leave me_. "Why would you do that?" _Don't go, Laura. Please don't go. _

"If it's best for Cara-"

"What's best for Cara is if you get yourself settled," Lorne interrupted. "She'll react to your reactions. And if you're not settled, she'll know."

Laura looked at where the children were chattering to each other and shook her head. "I'm a mess, Evan." Her voice cracked and to her horror, tears spilled out of her eyes and down her cheeks.

Lorne thought later that if he'd had a P-90 held to his head he wouldn't have been able to stop himself from reaching for her and folding her into his arms. She clung to him, her tears falling faster as he tucked her head under his chin and simply held on. The light scent of her vanilla perfume tickled his nostrils when he buried his face in her hair.

Cara watched from across the clearing. Her stomach had a funny ache in it. "Mama's crying," she whispered to Torrin. "She's crying so hard." She watched as Evan hugged her mother tight and rubbed her hair, the same way that Mama did when Cara fell down and hurt her knees.

Torrin squirmed uncomfortably at Cara's revelation. She was okay, for a girl. She could run races and play tag and she always helped him escape from the nursery or annoy Uncle Rodney. But now she wasn't smiling. She looked sad. He took a deep breath and put his arm around her shoulders. "It's okay, Cara," he said to her. "I'll look after you."

Lorne waited until Laura's sobs had slowed to shuddering hiccups and soaked through the front of his shirt. He pulled back so he could look at her face. "Feel better?"

She nodded and sniffled, rubbing at her eyes like Cara did when she was tired. The action made him smile at her. She looked up at him, her hazel eyes full of tears. "Why are you always coming back?"

He cradled her face in his hands, wiping away a tear with his thumb. "Because I can't keep away."

"I'm sorry." She sniffled again and reached into her pocket for a Kleenex. "I wish I could be…more…"

"More what?" He cast a quick glance over her shoulder to make sure the children were still in visual range. Spying Torrin putting an arm around Cara, he made a mental note to talk to the little girl later about gate safety. It would give him an excuse to spend some time with her.

Laura shrugged, her braid falling over one shoulder. "Just…more." She took a deep breath and stepped back from him.

Lorne's arms fell to his side, feeling almost empty without her warmth. He folded them to keep from reaching for her again. "Laura, you're perfect just the way you are."

"I'm far from perfect, Evan."

"To me you're perfect," he said sadly. "But if you can't see that then we're in trouble before we even start." He looked at Cara and Torrin, who were watching them. Torrin was holding Cara's hand in his protectively, their shoulders touching in a show of unity that would have been sweet if he hadn't been so torn up inside. "Laura, you're the best thing to happen to me in…well, forever. I don't know how else to say it."

Laura was shaking her head at him. "Evan, don't, please."

"I'm in love with you," he said simply. "I am. I can't help it. I know we decided to give each other space, but I don't want that."

Laura felt herself beginning to tremble at his words. "I'm not ready, Evan. I'm not ready to be in love."

"I'm not asking you to be," Lorne retorted. "I'm asking you not to give up without giving us a chance. I'm asking you to trust me. No, Laura," he added when she began to protest. "You don't trust me completely."

"I can't," she whispered. "I'm so scared of hurting again."

"Laura, I could get killed on my next mission," Lorne told her seriously. "So could you. But that's no reason to not try."

"I have to go," Laura said, looking around for Torrin and Cara. "Cara? Torrin? Let's go." She waited until they were running towards her. "We have to be back when the Daedalus gets to Atlantis."

Lorne nodded. "Fine." He forced a smile as Cara and Torrin reached them. Cara immediately slipped a hand into her mother's and looked expectantly at him. Torrin took Laura's other hand and nodded at him.

"I'll look after the girls," he declared.

Lorne nodded at him. "Appreciate that, Torrin." He began to dial the gate and waited until he heard Chuck's voice in his ear. "Coming through." Tapping his earpiece, he turned to say goodbye to the children.

"Bye, Evan," Cara called. "I'll come visit you later."

"Ok, princess. And Laura?"

"Yes?" Laura looked at him, wondering what he could possibly have left to say to her.

"When I said I wouldn't wait for you?" He offered her another one of those sad smiles. "I lied. I wouldn't wait for any woman, but you're not just any woman. For you, I'd wait." He waved at the children and stepped through the gate.

* * *

"Jen?" Lorne called out to Jennifer, looking around the infirmary. He smiled when she poked her head out from behind an open closet door in the corner. Her blonde hair was dishevelled, and her face was smudged with dust. "Hey, Doc."

Jennifer took one look at him and pointed towards her office. "In there. I'll follow you in a minute." She locked up the supply closet she had been spring cleaning and headed towards her office.

Lorne was sitting in one of the spare chairs when she came in, staring into space. His blue eyes were troubled, as they had been so often in the last few weeks. Jennifer felt torn between wanting to shake him for being so careless with his heart and wanting to shake Laura for hurting him. She frowned. It sucked being caught in the middle between friends.

"What's up?" She took a seat in the chair across from him and waited for him to talk to her. Evan almost always cracked eventually. It was just a case of being as patient as he was and not giving up until he told her what the problem was.

"You told me yesterday that you wanted to speak to me," Lorne reminded her with a frown. "Remember?"

Jennifer frowned for a moment, and then her eyes lit up. "Yes! Sorry. Now I remember. Sorry." She rubbed her face, smearing the dust farther across her cheek. When she noticed his smile, she looked confused. "What?"

"You've got dirt on your face," Lorne pointed out.

"Crap." Jennifer pulled a Kleenex from her pocket and rubbed at her face. "Better?" When he nodded, she sat forward in her chair. "What happened?"

"Jen, you're confusing me. Why did you ask me to stop by?"

"Table that for a second," Jennifer ordered. "What happened, Ev? You look like hell."

"Nothing," Lorne said shortly. "Jen, no offense, but I've got work to do and I-"

"Oh give it a rest," Jennifer snorted. "I'm a doctor, I know more about you than your own mother. Why would you even think that you could fool me?"

"Has it occurred to you that maybe I don't want to talk about it?" Lorne got up and began to pace. "I'm tired of talking. To you, to her. I can't keep talking about it."

Jennifer folded her arms and waited for him to continue. In wardly, she was starting to become concerned for him. Evan was usually so stoic. He faced down life-and-death situations on three out of four missions and he always bounced back. This time, he wasn't doing so well. Wanting Laura was hurting him, something she hated to see, as a doctor and as his friend.

"I'm in love with her, Jen." Evan stopped pacing and looked at her, despair written all over his face. "I don't know what to do."

"I know," Jennifer said quietly, wishing that she could find some way to comfort him. "I know you are, Ev."

"She doesn't love me." His voice was flat. "I've tried. She doesn't love me."

"I don't think that's true." Jennifer chose her words carefully, not wanting to upset him even further. "I think she does, or at least she wants to. But she's terribly afraid, Evan. She's just been so hurt before-"

"Jen, I didn't hurt her," Lorne said wearily. "Carson died. Yes, it was horrible. He was my friend too and I hurt when he died. But is she going to shut herself off from the world and deprive Cara of a chance to have a father-figure because she's scared? Damn it, Jen, I can't do this anymore."

"Evan – "

"It's only been two weeks," Lorne continued as if she hadn't spoken. "Two weeks, Jen, and I'm going out of my mind. How am I supposed to do it for months or years?"

Jennifer got up and planted herself in front of him to stop his pacing. "Listen to me. Listen," she insisted, when he shook his head. "I want you happy, Evan. You're the closest thing I've got to family out here and I hate seeing you like this. But I'm telling you, don't give up on her."

He looked suddenly hopeful. "Has she said something to you?"

Jennifer shook her head. "Evan, even if she had I couldn't tell you. It's not my place. All I can do is listen to you when you want to talk."

He shook his head in disgust." I'm turning into a girl," he joked, trying to lighten the mood. "She's got me wrung out, Jen. I can't see straight around her."

"Ev, it's not a bad thing to love somebody," Jennifer said gently, looking down at the ring sparkling on her finger and smiling at the thought of the man who'd given it to her. "Sometimes it can change your whole life."

"I'm glad you're happy," Lorne told her. "And who knows, maybe someday I will be too." He hugged her briefly and set her at arms length. "Now, enough about me. You're the bride-to-be. What did you want me to do?"

Jennifer looked at him, her eyes serious. "I want you to give me away."

Lorne wasn't sure he'd heard right. "You want what?"

"It's tradition," Jennifer stated calmly. "In a traditional wedding, the bride gets given away at the beginning of the ceremony."

"I've been to a few weddings, Doc," Lorne told her. "You want me to give you away?"

"Yes." She waited for his answer, her eyes fixed on his. "Ronon has asked John to be his best man and Rodney to stand with them." A fond smile crossed her face. "He's going with me on the traditional wedding thing. God knows why it's so important to me, seeing as how I'm marrying an alien and all."

"Jen –"

"It's okay if you don't want to," she rushed on. "I just thought…Dad won't be here because of the security clearances…and I already told you that you're like a brother to me after all these years out here…"

"Jen –"

"Forget I asked," she said quickly. "It's okay! I-"

"Jennifer, would you listen to me?" He took her hands in his and smiled properly for the first time in weeks. "I'd be honoured."

Her eyes lit up. "You would?"

"I would," he told her, wishing he could make Laura light up like that. "Thank you for asking me."

Jennifer threw her arms around him and laughed. "Idiot," she declared fondly. "Who else would I ask?"

"True," Lorne teased. He slung an arm around her shoulders. "Now tell me, do I have to wear a tie to this thing?"

* * *

Sam took a deep breath and nodded to Chuck to indicate that he could hook her up to the city's intercom system. When he nodded, she began to speak. "Attention all personnel, this is Colonel Carter."

Knowing that all over the city, people were stopping what they were doing and listening intently gave her a sense of deep satisfaction. To her, being in charge meant more than just telling people what to do. It meant being responsible for every man, woman and child on the base and gaining their respect. In Sam's eyes, the respect was far more important and meaningful than the title.

"I'd like to inform you all that the Daedalus has just come out of hyperspace and will be orbiting our planet very soon. All military personnel are to report to the Gate Room in thirty minutes. "When she signalled to Chuck, he flipped off the intercom and gave her the thumbs up.

"Thanks, Chuck," she said gratefully. "I'm going to my quarters to change. I'll be on my com if you need me."

"Yes ma'am."

* * *

Laura looked down at her squirming daughter and sighed. Since they'd gotten back from New Athos, Cara had been demanding to go and show Evan her dress. Laura had finally managed to talk her out of it by telling her that it should be a surprise like Jennifer's dress or she and Teyla's. They were positioned to the side of the assembled military contingent, but close enough to the front to be able to see what was going on.

"Mama, when are they coming down?" Cara demanded in a stage whisper, drawing smiles from those nearest to her. "When?"

"Soon," Laura whispered. "Now be good, baby, okay?"

Cara huffed indignantly. "I'm always good, Mama."

Laura smiled. She had clearly forgotten trying to push Torrin in the river near the Athosian settlement not three hours before. She looked to the head of the line, thinking that it was exactly as it should be.

Sam had called for the military personnel to assemble, but Rodney, Ronon, Jennifer and Teyla had come to take their place in the greeting party.

Atlantis wasn't much for ceremony, but this was something everyone loved to be part of. Lorne and John Sheppard flanked Sam, as always. Teyla stood beside her husband, Lily in one arm, Torrin at her side. Ronon stood behind Jennifer, one hand on her shoulder. Rodney was standing near Major Louise Kerr, casting furtive glances at her every now and again.

Laura made a mental note to ask him what that was about in the lab at a later date.

"Atlantis, this is the Daedalus. " The deep voice of Colonel Caldwell filled the room as his transmission was routed to the city PA. "We're ready to land on the East Pier as usual, but before we do, there are some packages we'd like to beam down directly to you in the control room."

Laura watched Sam carefully for a reaction. Their leader frowned, then tapped on her earpiece. "This is Carter," she said clearly. "Welcome back, Colonel. What are these packages you have for us?"

"I'll send them on down," Caldwell answered. Laura thought that his deep voice held a hint of amusement.

"Go ahead," Sam called after looking to John Sheppard for confirmation. "Send them down."

The beam activated, and six figures stood in the middle of the floor.

Laura heard Cara shriek and saw her run forward. Sam was doing the same. The light cleared and she understood why.

"Well now," Cameron Mitchell drawled, picking Cara up and settling her on his hip as she threw herself at him. "Isn't this a welcoming party?"

**Good? Bad? Hate it? Love it? Let me know!**


	17. Reunions and Revelations

**Hey all, I am sorry I've taken so long with this stuff, I've been really busy. So to make up for it, I am giving ye two new chapters to read. I hope Christmas preparations are going well for all of you who celebrate the festive season. **

**Thanks as usual to my beta, Asugar, without whom I would be inconsistent and also repetitive. Thanks Asugar! **

**I'll reply to the reviews as soon as I find time! **

**Happy Holidays, **

**Eva x  
**

**Chapter 17. Reunions and Revelations.**

"I've got to say, Sam," Cam said, looking around the spacious 'living room' of Sam's quarters, "You've got a great place here."

"Thanks," Sam answered with a grin. She looked around the bright, airy room with its two couches and two soft chairs. She had been delighted when the room, affectionately dubbed the "Executive Suite" had been allocated to her for her own use. Although she didn't get to spend enough time there, it was nice to have a place to go to besides her office or her bedroom when she wanted some time to herself.

It was also damn convenient when you had extra visitors from home and wanted to catch up away from the prying eyes and eager ears of the rest of the expedition.

"I got a professional decorator to help me out," Sam told him with a straight face.

"You did not," John Sheppard contradicted from his place on the floor in front of the Atlantis version of a solid fuel fire. "You made Ronon and me drag the furniture around while you and Teyla and Jen stood and watched."

"Get over it," Jen told him lazily. She was sitting in Ronon's lap on one of the chairs, playing idly with one of his long dreadlocks. "It's your job to do what your wife tells you."

"Since when?" Ronon asked, raising his eyebrows at her. He looked at John, who immediately looked at Teyla before nodding vigorously at him. "I've got to rethink this whole marriage thing, if that's the case."

"You're getting a great deal there," Carolyn Mitchell pointed out loyally, smiling at Jennifer. "She's one of the best."

"Thank you," Jennifer replied, giving Ronon a smug look. "I keep telling him that, but he doesn't believe me."

"You sound like McKay," Ronon told her, grunting when she elbowed him in the stomach. "Hey!"

"I could say the same," Rodney protested. "Why do you make that sound so bad? I'm considered to be quite a catch, you know. I am the-"

"Smartest man in two galaxies. We know, Rodney," Laura finished with a smile. "You don't have to remind us again."

"Now, kids," Daniel said with a wide grin. "Do I have to separate you two?"

"No, Dad," Laura answered with a smirk.

"Anyone know why we were all told to meet here?" Cam asked. "Not that I'm not glad to be here, but if there was a meeting then why aren't we in that conference room?"

"General O'Neill asked us to wait here," Sam reminded him. "He'll explain when he gets here."

"Where is he?" John wondered, looking at Sam. "You got any ideas?"

"Oh yeah, he tells me everything," Sam said sarcastically. "I know exactly what goes on in his mind." She folded her arms and closed her mouth with a snap.

Because she saw the flash of something akin to pain in Sam's eyes, Laura spoke up. "He tells us to wait, we have to wait." She shrugged when John eyed her. "I'd do the same if you told me to wait around, sir."

"The perks of being a superior officer," Cam spoke up. "He can tell us to wait standing on our heads if he wants to."

"But he wouldn't," Carolyn said dryly. "Because that would be just pointless. And Jack isn't into time wasting."

"Well," Vala said brightly before Cam could retort. "This is nice, isn't it?" She looked around the room, taking in the occupants. "All these happy families."

Laura looked around her, wondering what she was talking about. She smiled at the sight. Carolyn was curled up next to Cam on one of the couches. Her head was resting on his shoulder, her hand stroking his arm. Daniel was sitting on her other side, long legs stretched out in front of him. Vala was lying with her head on his lap, legs dangling off the end of the sofa.

Laura often thought that Vala was the best thing to happen to Daniel since he had lost his wife so many years before. She had heard stories and seen a painting of Sharae, and everyone in the SGC had heard the tragic story of her death at the hands of the Goauld. Daniel had seemed lost somehow until he had met Vala. The spark that had always been there had turned into something deeper and more solid. Daniel's quieter nature seemed to balance out Vala's fiery temperament somehow.

Laura turned her attention to the other sofa. Teal'c and Sam were sitting next to Rodney, who was sitting with his arms folded across his chest defiantly. He was clearly still sulking about Ronon's earlier comment.

Teyla was sitting in one of the chairs, Lily cooing in her lap. John was content to sit on the floor, his back leaning against Teyla's legs. The other chair contained Ronon and Jennifer, who were still teasing Rodney. Laura herself was sitting on a stool she had taken from the kitchen table and set next to Teyla's chair.

They looked so happy, Laura thought, wondering why she felt suddenly lonely. She looked over at her daughter, playing in the corner with Torrin. Cara's little face was animated as she chattered to her friend, telling him all about her Uncle Cam and how she was sure that he would have a present for her on the Daedalus and that she would share it with Torrin. The notion made her lips curve into a smile.

The sound of the door chimes sent Sam to the door. She swiped at the access panel to open the doors and smiled when she saw Lorne standing on the other side. He looked momentarily startled when he saw the group inside, but recovered almost immediately. "General O'Neill asked me to wait here for him, ma'am."

"Come on in," Sam invited, standing back to allow him inside. "Take a seat wherever you find room."

"Evan!" Cara ran towards him, full tilt, wrapping her arms around his legs. "Did you see who's come to visit?"

"I sure did," he answered, smiling at her childish enthusiasm. He gently unwound her arms from his legs so he could pick her up. She put her arms around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. "Colonel Mitchell, Dr. Mitchell. Good to see you again." After giving his superiors a salute, he took a seat on the edge of the chair, next to Jennifer and settled Cara into his lap comfortably.

The natural ease didn't go unnoticed by Cam, who narrowed his eyes slightly at Lorne. Beside him, Carolyn was watching Laura. She noticed the slight tightening of her jaw, the flush that rose to her cheeks and immediately put two and two together. A quick glance to her left told her that Cameron was doing the same. When he caught her eye she sent him a silent message.

_Simmer down, flyboy._

Cam sighed and gave a barely perceptible nod_. Fine. But I'm going to interrogate him later._

"Uncle Cam, did you bring me a present?" Cara demanded, looking over at her godfather. "Did you?"  
"Am I not enough?" Cam pretended to look offended at the question. "That's nice, kid."

"Stop teasing her," Carolyn scolded lightly before Laura could chastise Cara for being impolite. "Of course we did, honey. It's in our quarters. We'll take a little walk in a bit and get it for you."

"Did you bring me one too?" Torrin asked immediately. He put down the toy helicopter he had been playing with and crossed to stand at Evan's side. "And Lily?"

"Torrin, that is not a polite question to ask a guest," Teyla told him firmly. "Cameron and Carolyn are Cara's godparents. They are allowed to bring gifts for her."

Torrin immediately turned accusing eyes to Rodney. "You're my godparent. Do you have a present for me?"

Rodney squirmed. "It's not your birthday yet." He looked at John, who shrugged and bit back a smile. "Do I have to get you stuff when it's not your birthday?"

"Once a week would be fine," Torrin told him airily. "And extra when it's my birthday."

Gales of laughter greeted this statement and Rodney's outraged splutter. Torrin grinned at them all and went to clamber into Rodney's lap. "I love you, Uncle Rodney."

"Sure you do," Rodney muttered, but he allowed Torrin to settle into his lap and lean against him. The corners of his mouth quirked into a smile. "Why wouldn't you?"  
"Indeed," Teal'c agreed. "Dr McKay is most lovable."

Rodney looked perplexed. "Is he serious? Or is he teasing me? It's hard to tell with these warrior types."

"I think he's teasing," Daniel cut in, rolling his eyes at the scientist. "But I could answer that question, if you like."

"Now Daniel," Vala said warningly, seeing Rodney's eyes widen. "We agreed that you would be nice to Rodney. Remember, he's not quite as smart as you are."

"Not quite? What do you mean, not quite? I'm much smarter than him," Rodney said hotly. "What's he got that I don't have?"

"Me," Vala answered, fluttering her eyelashes at him. "Next question?"

"Rodney has Louise," Torrin announced. "He took her to breakfast two days in a row and he looks at her funny when she comes into the room."

Rodney turned red and began to splutter indignantly. "I do not. Why would you say that?" He looked at the amused faces watching him and gave them all a glare. "You're obviously making it up."

"He is not," Cara declared from her safe perch on Lorne's knee. " It's true. You look at her funny, like Torrin said."

"He followed her to the armoury once," Torrin told the group, who were listening in amazement.

"How on earth do you know that?" Laura asked, mystified.

"Never mind that," John cut in, leaning forward. "Why didn't you _tell_ me?"

"Never mind _that_!" Cam leaned forward and eyed Torrin. "Who is Louise?"

"She's a Marine," Torrin answered. "She's got her own team and everything. She's got brown hair and brown eyes and she kicks ass in the gym."

"Torrin!" Teyla scolded. "That is not a polite phrase. Where are your manners?"

"Not Rodney's usual type," Ronon said with a grin. "He usually goes for blondes."

"Why didn't you tell me?" John repeated. He glanced at Rodney's red face and laughed. "McKay, are you sexually harassing my marines?"

"He didn't say anything to her," Torrin revealed, giving his father a contrite look. "I forgot to tell you, Papa."

"He chickened out," Cara chimed in, not to be outdone by Torrin's revelation. She sighed and turned to her mother. "It'd never happen to a Marine, Mama."

Laura's jaw dropped while Lorne began to shake with laughter. Torrin looked at the amazed group of adults and back to Rodney, who was unable to speak and whose face was rapidly turning purple with embarrassment. "Or Air Force, right Papa?"

"Oh no, you're not going there," Carolyn warned her husband, who had opened his mouth to respond. "No inter-service rivalry debates, please." She turned to Rodney, who had yet to speak. "Do you need a doctor, Rodney? You're looking a little flushed."

Rodney opened his mouth to respond and shut it again. He looked at Torrin accusingly. "Someday you'll regret this, Torrin Sheppard. Just wait until you've got a girlfriend."

"Rodney's gotta girlfriend," Cara chanted, clapping her hands. "Rodney's gotta gi-"

"And you!" Rodney pointed at Cara. "Just wait until you have a boyfriend and you bring him home to Cadman! Don't expect me to bail you out then!"

"Cara's not dating until she's forty," Lorne said firmly before Laura could speak.

Cam narrowed his eyes at him again, prompting Carolyn to take his hand firmly in hers and squeeze his fingers hard enough to make him wince.

"Torrin, you should not follow Rodney around," Teyla told her son. "It is not polite."

John sighed. "Much as I hate to agree, Teyla's right. Torrin, if you're going to follow Rodney, wait until I'm there to do it with you."

Rodney made a choking noise and sent a deadly glare at John.

"Dr McKay, it is most unusual for you to remain so silent," Teal'c said calmly. "Are you feeling well?"

"He can't talk much around Louise, either," Torrin put in. "His face goes a little red and he starts to talk about science to make her think he's clever."

Rodney was saved from replying by the peal of chimes. Sam hopped up again to answer it and found Jack standing on the other side of the door. "General. Come in, sir."

Jack entered the room, rolling his eyes when Cam, Laura and John surged to their feet. Lorne followed suit as soon as he set Cara on her feet. "Oh please, give it a rest. I'm on vacation."

"Old habits, sir," Cam said when they had settled into their positions again.

"I'm sure," Jack answered dryly. He watched as Daniel yanked a protesting Vala into a sitting position so that he could take a seat beside her. "I guess you're all wondering why you're here and not in the conference room."

"The thought had crossed our minds," Daniel said mildly.

"Did you bring presents?" Cara asked excitedly. She ignored her mother's groan and smiled expectantly at Jack as she clambered back into Lorne's lap.

"I did," the general answered. "But not for you. Sheppard?"  
"Yes, sir?" John fought his instinct to snap to attention and settled for sitting up straighter.

"I've been keeping an eye on you, Sheppard," Jack told him, watching the fleeing surprise and the hint of panic cross John's face. "And both General Landry and I like what we're seeing."

"Thank you, sir," John answered, relieved that he wasn't about to get a dressing down, "That's very…nice…of you both."

"You too, Lorne," Jack added, his expression bland as he switched his attention to the major.

"Thank you, sir." Lorne echoed John's words, looking at Sam to see if she had any indication as to where the general was going with this. She looked as puzzled as he felt.

"Where are you going with this?" Vala asked. She threw Daniel a dirty look when he elbowed her. "What? I'm just asking what the rest of you are thinking! He can't court-martial _me_."

"Actually, I can," Jack joked, enjoying the way she immediately shut her mouth. "But that's not the point here."

"Then what is the point, Jack?" Daniel ventured, looking puzzled. "And why were we all left in the dark about it?"

"Promotion is the point, Daniel," Jack said sarcastically. "And what I'm trying to say is that the major and Sheppard here are both receiving promotions."

Silence greeted his announcement. Stunned silence on the part of John and Lorne, who both looked flabbergasted.

"What are they going to be called now?" Torrin asked. Having been raised in a military atmosphere, he knew exactly what a promotion was and was looking excited at the prospect. "Are they going to be a general like you?"

"Not quite," Jack answered with a wry smile. "They're not as important as me just yet. Major Lorne is being promoted to Lieutenant Colonel."

"Thank you, sir," Lorne managed, still shocked by the announcement. Excitement was starting to seep through. He was aware of Laura's wide smile and the congratulations being offered to him by Sam and Cameron.

"What about Papa?" Torrin persisted, wriggling from Rodney's lap and going to his father's side. "What's he going to be?"

"Full bird Colonel," Jack answered, nodding at John. "Congratulations, Sheppard. You've earned it."

"But he's already a Colonel," Torrin said, looking puzzled. "Isn't he getting a new name too?"

Jack looked momentarily stumped, but he nodded thoughtfully at Torrin. "That's true. He's a Lieutenant Colonel now. After the promotion, he'll be a full bird Colonel."

"What's a full bird mean?" Cara asked.

"It's a Colonel like Uncle Cam, sweetheart," Laura explained. "It's better than what Colonel Sheppard is now."

"So he's a half a Colonel?" Cara wondered.

"Sort of," Sam cut in with a smile. "Now he'll be the same kind of Colonel as Cameron and I."

"Will he be your boss?" Torrin asked her. "He's been here for years more than you have."

"He'll be still my boss," Laura told the child. "And he'll be Evan's boss. He'll be more important now."

"But not as important as me." Jack joked. He looked at John, who still hadn't spoken, but was sitting with a grin spreading across his face. "Congratulations, Sheppard."

"Thank you, sir," John said, his smile threatening to break his face in half.

"You're welcome," Jack replied, getting to his feet. He sighed when Lorne and John immediately rose and saluted him. "I'm going to have to keep telling you, aren't I?"

"Probably, sir," John answered, still grinning.

"Definitely, sir," Lorne agreed, his smile matching John's.

"I'm going to go and get some coffee," Jack said. "And some food. Breaking good news to people makes me hungry. Anyone care to join me?"

"I will, O'Neill," Teal'c said, rising to his feet. He inclined his head towards John and Lorne. "My congratulations to you both."

"I'll go, too," Vala said suddenly. She got to her feet. "Muscles, you've been here more than I have. Do they have chocolate cookies here?"

Sam shook her head as they left the room, smiling at Vala's ability to be at ease in any company and make herself at home.

"Evan, you got promoted!" Jennifer squealed, throwing her arms around him. "Way to go!" She planted a kiss on his lips, laughing at his shocked look.

"I got promoted too," John told her, laughing at Lorne's dazed expression. "Do I get a kiss?"

"You've got a wife," Jennifer pointed out before she threw her arms around him and kissed him. "Congratulations, John."

"Yes," Rodney stood up to shake hands with Lorne, then John. "Well done. I can't think of two people who deserve it more."

"I can," Ronon teased with a smirk as he shook hands with Lorne and pounded John on the back. "But they'd be my second choice." He caught John around the middle in a bear hug, making him grunt as the air was knocked out of him.

"Thanks," John said with a mock frown when Ronon set him on the ground again. "That's really nice of you, buddy."

Teyla had risen to her feet while her husband accepted the congratulations of his teammates and colleagues. "I believe it is my turn to offer my good wishes."

She handed the now sleeping Lily to Laura, who was watching them with interest.

"Evan, it is a well deserved reward." She touched her forehead to his and smiled at him. "I am happy for you."

"Thanks, Teyla," Lorne answered, touched by the gesture, knowing it was one she didn't offer just anybody.

"I got promoted, too," John began, his smile widening as she came to stand in front of him.

"Indeed you did," Teyla said softly. "Congratulations, John." She leaned up and kissed him lightly on the lips.

"I think we can do better than that," John told her. He wrapped her in his arms and kissed her soundly, the action prompting Torrin to make retching noises and Cara to giggle. "There." He released her, pleased to see her eyes slightly glazed and her cheeks flushed.

"You don't usually do that in front of people," Rodney commented.

"I don't usually get promoted," John retorted. "Got a problem with it?"

Rodney opened his mouth to make a scathing retort, but shut it again when he caught Cam's eye. The other colonel stepped up to add his congratulations to his colleague.

"Nice work, Shep."

"Thanks," John said, accepting Cam's handshake.

"Will there be a party?" Cara asked, tugging on Lorne's sleeve. "Evan, will there be cake and music like the welcome parties?"

"There'll be a party," Lorne assured her, swinging her into his arms again. "It's going to be fun."

"Can we come to the party?" Torrin begged his father. "Can we eat Uncle Rodney's cake?"

"Oh that's just great," Rodney said indignantly. "First you want to blab about my love life, and now you want to eat my cake."

"I am sure that Sam will allow you and Cara to be present," Teyla told her son, holding out a hand to him. When he came to her side, she put one arm around him. "But now I think it is time you got ready for bed. It has been a long day and you have nursery tomorrow."

"I agree," Laura added, holding her arms out for Cara, who shook her head and burrowed into Lorne.

"I'll walk with you," he told Laura when she tried to pry Cara away. "She'll settle then." He tightened his hold on Cara, who was clinging to him like a limpet.

Laura sighed before nodding her agreement. She kissed Lily's soft cheek and bid the visitors goodnight.

She just knew that they would be talking about them before she even got to the transporter.

* * *

Cam waited until Laura had left the room before turning an accusing eye to Sam. "You never told me about this."

"About what?" Sam asked innocently.

"Don't give me that," Cam told her with a frown. "About Laura and Lorne."

"What about them?" Sam pretended to be puzzled.

"What's this…" Cam made a circular motion with his hands. "Thing…with them. There's a thing, Sam. What is it?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Carolyn, honey, back a guy up here." Cam turned to his wife, who shrugged.

"It's not our business, Cam."

"But what about Cara?" Cam persisted, looking to Daniel for support. When the archaeologist shrugged in much the same fashion as Carolyn had, Cam threw his hands up in disgust. "Isn't anyone going to tell me what's going on here?"

"Oh for God's sake," Rodney, still in the room, said crossly. "Let's see, Lorne is in love with Cadman. But maybe being so blind to anything but flying planes and shooting things, you wouldn't see it." He pointed a finger at Cam, who rolled his eyes. Rodney snorted in disgust before continuing his rant. "Now Cadman, typical of a woman, she's not sure what she wants. _Also_ typical of a woman, she's taking it out on everyone around her, which means _my_ scientists." He looked at Cam, who stared back at him, unblinking. "That sum it up for everyone?"

"Rodney!" Jennifer smacked the side of his head. "Could you be _more_ insensitive?"

"Could I be more _right_?" Rodney shot back. "Please. Lorne's been moping for weeks. Cadman's not much better and I for one am tired of it. So how do we get them together?"

Stunned silence fell on the other occupants of the room. Finally, Daniel spoke up. "How do we know they want to be together?"

Rodney's answer was a pointed look and a roll of his eyes. " Oh please. We know because we're not blind, that's how."

"Okay," Daniel said slowly. "Point taken. So what do we do?"

"I'll tell you what we don't do," Cam declared. "We don't interfere." He was looking directly at Rodney and Vala as he spoke. "Laura's been through enough and she doesn't need any more trauma."

"I think she needs a little push," Carolyn mused. She grimaced at her husband's disbelieving look. "Sorry, Cam. But I do. Sometimes all you need is someone to point you in the right direction."

Cam looked to John for help. "Shep? Got any suggestions?"

"Teyla doesn't think we should interfere," John said seriously. " Plus we've already tried and failed. But if you want help, ask Keller. She's got the dirt on every man, woman and child on this base!"

"Doctor patient confidentiality," Carolyn said immediately, giving Jennifer a grin. "She won't dish."

Doesn't usually stop her," John muttered.

"Thank you," Jennifer said calmly, giving him a sweet smile Ronon recognised as deadly. "Next time you get injured off-world, I'll be personally taking all the necessary precautions." Her smile widened. "And some unnecessary ones too."

John shuddered. "Teyla, help your husband out here."

"I think you are doing quite well on your own." Teyla shifted Lily from her shoulder to the crook of her arm when the baby began to fuss. "She needs a feed, John. I will take her to our quarters and get her settled."

"It's not like he can do it," Rodney muttered under his breath.

"Thank you for pointing that out, Rodney," John said sarcastically.

"He likes to tell people things they already know," Torrin piped up. "Papa says it makes him feel clever to tell people stupid things."

Rodney's mouth fell open. "Do you ever say anything nice about me?"

"Not really," Torrin said before John could answer. "He says it's fun to rattle you and that I'm going to be an expert at it before I'm six." He looked at his mother. "Mama, when am I six?"

"Soon," Teyla said with a smile. "Not long after Cara's birthday."

"Will there be a party, Mama? Can Lily come too?"

"I like this kid," Cam told Daniel, who nodded. "He's got all the right ideas going on."

"Blame his father," Sam butted in. "John has passed all of his considerable skills at tormenting people and getting his own way on to him."

"Can I help finish his education?" Cam asked John. "I'd like to see him in action."

"Sure," John answered with a shrug. "The more the merrier. In fact, Rodney's lab is the best place to start."

"It is getting late," Teyla interrupted, seeing Rodney's panic at the thought of both Cam and John in his lab with the miniature army in tow. "There will be no education tonight." She turned to the others. "It is wonderful to see you all again. We will catch up, as you say, tomorrow. Carolyn, why don't you come with Laura and I to New Athos? We are collecting some of Marina's materials to decorate the gate room for the wedding."

"It's a girl's thing," Torrin said to Cam and Daniel in disgust. "Papa, do I have to go?"

"Are you a girl?" John asked him, hauling the boy onto his hip.

"I bet you'd look swell in a dress," Cam teased, laughing when Torrin shook his head violently.

"Then you are going to be doing guy stuff with us tomorrow." John touched his nose with a finger before setting him on his feet. "Now, it's time for you to go to bed like your Mom said. Cara's already gone. No arguments," he warned when Torrin started to protest. "It's late and that's that." He took Torrin's hand and headed towards the door.

"I'd like that," Carolyn said to Teyla, delighted to be included. "What time?"

"We are leaving at nine hundred hours," Teyla replied. Lily began to whimper restlessly and Teyla smiled. "Time for her feed. Goodnight."

The echoes of goodnight floated back to her as she followed John and Torrin down the corridor. She slipped her free hand into John's and smiled up at him. "This is going to be quite an occasion."

"Quite," John said with a grimace. "I hope my dress blues still fit."

Teyla cocked her head to one side, giving him a considering look. "You have not gotten much fatter than you were the last time you wore them."

"That was for our wedding," John protested. "I haven't gotten fat. That's just…"

"I think you got fatter," Torrin said, patting his father's flat belly. He giggled when John pretended to choke him. "Only teasing, Papa!"

"I think you're delusional," John said to his wife. "You're obviously in need of glasses. Go and see Jennifer first thing in the morning. You'll start to walk into things soon."

Torrin laughed at the thought of his mother walking into walls and people. "Mama, you need glasses."

"She really does," John said solemnly. "It's the only explanation I can think of."

"Or perhaps you just got fatter," Teyla said again, the teasing glint still in her eye. "That is also a reasonable explanation."

"You're going to pay for that," John remarked, eyeing her as they approached the door to their quarters. "Mark my words. You'll pay."

"What is it the Marines say?" Teyla eyed him right back as she swiped at the door panel. "Bring it on."

* * *

Laura watched as Cara snuggled into her bed, her beloved monkey in her arms. The little girl had begged and cajoled until Lorne had agreed to stay and help Laura put her to bed. She had insisted on reciting her prayers to him, the childish pleas to watch over her mama and her new friends on Atlantis making him smile.

The smile had disappeared when she had added a request to make her mama and Evan stop being sad and start laughing again.

Lorne pressed a kiss to Cara's forehead and turned to leave the room. Laura reached down to her daughter and kissed her, smoothing the brown curls from her forehead. "Night, baby. I love you."

"Love you too, Mama," Cara replied, her voice husky with sleep. "Sleep tight."

Laura straightened up and followed Lorne from the room. "Thanks for sticking around."

"No trouble," he said immediately. "I love spending time with her. You know that." He propped a hip against the wall and watched as she dropped into the sofa across from him and kicked her shoes off with a sigh. "She seems happier than she was earlier, going through the gate."

Laura sighed. "She tried to push Torrin in the river earlier when he told Jinto that she was afraid to go through the gate."

"That's my girl." Lorne's face creased into a smile that disappeared when he realised what he'd said. "Sorry, Laura. I didn't mean…"

"It's okay," she interrupted quickly. "Honestly, it's all right. Sir- Evan, why don't you sit down?"

"Making you nervous, Cadman?" Lorne teased, trying to lighten the mood a little.

Laura relaxed visibly and gave him a small smile. "Not likely." She gestured towards the sofa. "Please, sit down."

Lorne did as he was told and took a seat on the sofa beside her. He could smell vanilla, a scent he was starting to associate with her. "How are you feeling now?"

"Slightly ashamed of myself," Laura admitted ruefully. "I didn't mean to blubber all over you like that."

"Don't even go there," Lorne warned her, leaning forward so he could look directly into her eyes. "Listen to me. You don't have to thank me, or apologise to me. Understand?"

"Yes, sir," Laura replied, her smile widening when he grinned at her. She had the sudden urge to put her head on his shoulder and simply let him hold her. Instead, she moved back slightly, away from him.

Lorne watched her retreat and sighed. This was getting harder by the day. "Laura, I-"

"Evan, I-" Laura began at the same time.

They stopped and smiled at each other, feeling foolish. Lorne took her hands in his. "You go first."

"No, you," Laura told him. She didn't withdraw her hands from his. "What were you going to say?"

"It's about the wedding," Lorne continued. "Jen asked me to give her away,"

"That's great," Laura said slowly, hiding her confusion. She'd been sure he wanted to ask her to the wedding and a part of her had wanted him to. "Big day for you, huh?"

"Big," Lorne agreed, his thumb absently stroking the back of her hand. "Not every day you get promoted to lieutenant colonel."

"I'm proud of you," Laura said softly. "I mean it. You deserve it more than anyone I know." To emphasize her point, she squeezed his hand tightly. "Congratulations."

"I got a kiss from Jen," Lorne pointed out lightly. He was delighted when she flushed slightly. "Is that the best you can do?"

"Evan…"

"I'm kidding," he told her hurriedly when he saw the distress in her eyes. "Honestly, Laura. I'm kidding."

"No, it's not that," she said, getting to her feet and beginning to pace. "It's just that you've been so patient. So understanding. And I've hurt you."

"You didn't mean it," Lorne said immediately. "Laura, it's okay, really."

"No, it's not," Laura said hotly. "I can't stop thinking about you. I miss you when you're not there. I wonder what you're doing, how you are and if you miss me." She was wringing her hands together, her agitation palpable in the silence of the room.

Lorne watched her, his heart beginning to race. He clamped down on the surge of hope that rose in his chest, knowing that she'd shied away from him before and it could happen again all too easily. "I do miss you."

"It's just that I don't want to hurt you again," Laura said, biting her lip. "I don't want to-"

"Okay, hold up a sec," Lorne ordered, getting off the sofa so he could stop her frantic pacing. He gripped her arms, forcing her to stop. "Laura, relax."

"Is that an order?" Her voice was shaky. "Because I'm finding it really hard right now."

"If you need it to be, then yes," Lorne returned. "Now listen to me." When he was satisfied that she was listening, he continued. "Why don't you stop thinking about it so much? Neither of us are going anywhere, I hope."

"No," Laura admitted after a moment.

Lorne let out the breath he'd been holding at her hesitation and dropped his head so his forehead was pressed against hers. "Thank God. I thought you would leave and take Cara with you."

"She'd be miserable," Laura countered with a sigh, succumbing to the urge to lean against him. His arms came around her, wrapping tight and she sighed again. "So would I."

"I can't imagine Atlantis without you," Lorne told her. He stroked a hand over her hair, wishing he could stay like this.

"I really don't want to hurt you," Laura repeated, knowing that it was getting old at this stage. "Evan."

"Ssh." He touched his lips to hers softly. "Stop thinking about what you don't want." He kissed her forehead gently. "And try thinking about what you do want."

Laura closed her eyes as he kissed one cheek, then the other before his lips found hers again and she melted against him, kissing him back with a passion that left them both breathless. Heat speared through her, making her burrow against him. Her hands clutched his shirt before slipping around his neck.

From the doorway to her room, Cara watched, her smile spreading across her face. Maybe now her Mama would stop crying at night and be happy. Maybe Evan would be her other daddy just like she wished for and she wouldn't have to share him. And maybe they wouldn't have to be lonely anymore. She tiptoed back to her bed and climbed in again.

The smile was still on her face as she fell asleep.

**Review please!! And then read the next one!**


	18. The birds and the bees!

**And now the next! Enjoy! **

**Chapter 18. The Birds and The Bees. **

"Just how far is this Athos place?" Cam asked suspiciously, propping himself on one elbow and peering at his wife as she got out of bed. "Are you sure you want to go?"

"Cam, Teyla invited me," Carolyn said patiently as she clipped back her long dark hair. "And I want to catch up with Jennifer. It's been a while."

"But-"

"No buts," Carolyn said firmly. She smiled at him before disappearing into the bathroom. A few moments later Cam heard the shower running and he flopped back onto his pillows with a sigh.

"Don't look so disappointed," Carolyn told him a few minutes later when she came out of the shower in her bathrobe. Her skin was flushed from the heat and a few strands of hair clung to her damp forehead. "I'll be back later on."

"But right now, you're leaving." Cam did his best to look hurt.

"Yes, I'm leaving," Carolyn retorted when she saw the gleam in her husband's blue eyes. "Cameron, don't even think about it!"

"Think about what," Cam asked, his mouth creasing at the corners. He threw off the covers and advanced towards her.

"Detaining me," Carolyn said primly, swatting at the hand he was stroking along her back. "I'll be late Cam."

"Jen won't mind," Cam said, pressing his lips to the base of her neck. He smiled against her skin when she shivered a little. "Just tell her you slept in."

"Maybe she won't mind," Carolyn murmured as she turned into Cam's arms and wrapped hers around him. "I'll just tell her I slept late."

* * *

"Tell her you slept late," Daniel suggested with a smirk as Vala hopped around the room they had been assigned in a frenzy.

"I can't find my shoe," she exclaimed. "Where have you put it?"

"I think you'll find that you threw it at me," Daniel said dryly. "When you came in last night and I was asleep."

"You provoked me," Vala snorted. "I wanted to talk to you."

"You always want to talk to me," Daniel retorted. "But usually you talk and I listen."

"That's what I said," Vala shot back. She was on her hands and knees now, searching frantically for the missing shoe.

"Vala, you have at least six other pairs of shoes with you," Daniel said wearily. "Why don't you put on one of them instead?"

"How like a man to suggest that," Vala hissed from under the bed. She continued to rummage through the pile of clothing that she had tried on and discarded. "Damn it, where is that shoe!"

Daniel looked up from the book he had been studying and spied the shoe sitting innocently in the corner. "Vala?"

"Give it a rest, Daniel. I want the black shoe and I'm going to find it and that's that." Vala sounded grumpy.

Daniel looked down at her legs poking out from under the bed and sighed. Sometimes talking to Vala didn't help. Action was required. He reached down and grabbed hold of Vala's ankles, yanking hard until she slid out from under the bed.

"Daniel, what on earth are you doing?" Vala asked, sounding outraged. "I'm late!"

In answer, Daniel pointed to the corner and the shoe lying there. "That look familiar?"

Vala looked affronted. "You put it there!"

Daniel threw his hands up in disgust. "Yes, Vala. I hid your shoe so you'd be late and so I'd be blessed with your company while you obsess over what outfit to wear today."

Vala pulled on the offending shoe and glared at him. "Sometimes I can't think why I love you."

Daniel hauled her to her feet and planted a firm kiss on her pouting lips. "Because I'm irresistible?"

"Possibly," Vala said cheerfully. She gave him a wide grin and patted his cheek. "Or possibly because you're the only one available."

Daniel swatted her behind gently and kissed her again. "Yep. I'm irresistible. Go on. You're late."

"I'll tell them I slept in." Vala told him with a lazy smile. "Or else I'll tell them that we were having amazing-"

"Go!" Daniel interrupted her before she could finish. "Just go!"

* * *

"Be careful," John told Teyla as he accepted Lily from her and cradled her against his shoulder. "Don't get into any trouble."

They were standing in the Gate room, waiting for Vala and Carolyn to join them before dialling New Athos.

"I will behave myself," Teyla answered with her customary serene smile. She kissed Lily's cheek and laughed as the baby smiled at her. "Try and keep your father our of trouble, Torrin."

"I'll try, Mama," Torrin told her, slipping his hand into hers. "But sometimes he gets into trouble all by himself."

"Hey," John protested as Teyla slipped her bag over one shoulder. "I resent that!"

"Do not let Rodney test her ability to activate the Ancient devices he has in that lab," Teyla warned.

"I won't," John assured her. He gave her his most winning smile. "I'll shoot him if he tries."

Teyla rolled her eyes and turned to Ronon, who was standing next to Jennifer. "I trust you will keep an eye on him and not let him do any harm to Rodney."

"Sure," Ronon agreed, almost too readily. He eyed Jennifer. "Don't get into any trouble."

"Why do you think I'll get into trouble?" Jennifer huffed indignantly. "It's not even a mission. You people have no faith in me."

"Calamity Keller," John reminded her, laughing when she frowned at him. "Don't shoot the messenger, Doc. I didn't come up with it."

"I did," Rodney said smugly. "I thought it was very fitting." He dodged Ronon's quick blow expertly. "Hah! You missed!" And yelped as Lorne slapped the side of his head. "Ow! What is wrong with you!"

"Leave Jen alone," Lorne ordered with a grin for the doctor. He turned around when he heard his name being called.

"Evan!" Cara was rushing towards him, heedless of Laura's warnings to be careful and not to trip anybody up. "We're going shopping." She greeted him with her customary hug around his legs and tipped her face to his. "Want to come with us?"

"Not today, princess," Lorne answered, picking her up and settling her on his hip. He touched her nose with a fingertip. "I'm doing guy stuff today."

"With men," Torrin said, sticking his tongue out at Cara.

"That's not polite, Torrin Sheppard," Cara scolded before Teyla could open her mouth to chastise her son. "Mama, tell him it's not polite to stick your tongue out at a lady."

"It is not polite to stick your tongue out to anybody," Teyla added, giving Torrin a stern look. "Apologise to Cara, Torrin."

"Sorry," Torrin muttered, not sounding the least bit contrite. "Papa, can they go now?"

"Tired of girls, are you?" John asked, laughing as Torrin nodded emphatically. "Okay, son, let's go cause trouble."

"Bye Mama," Torrin said, hugging his mother. "Be careful."

"Bye," John echoed, touching his forehead to hers before kissing her. "Keep in touch, okay?"

"I will," Teyla said, squeezing his hand tightly. "Behave yourself."

"Okay, princess," Lorne said, hugging Cara tightly and kissing her cheek. "Be good for your Mama."

"I love you, Evan," Cara whispered into his ear before he set her on her feet beside Laura.

"Love you too," Lorne answered, ignoring the way Rodney muttered something that sounded suspiciously like I told you so.

Laura smiled up at him, driving every single thought out of his head except one. _You're beautiful._ He touched her hand gently. "Have fun."

Laura nodded, her hazel eyes sparkling as she looked at the little group assembling in front of them. "We will." Then she shocked him by reaching up and kissing him gently on the lips.

When Cara giggled and tugged on her sleeve she broke free and looked down at her daughter. "What is it, baby?"

"Mama, they're all looking at you funny," Cara told her, pointing to the others. She spotted Carolyn hurrying towards her, followed swiftly by Vala. "Aunt Carolyn!"

"Sorry," Carolyn panted, skidding to a halt in front of Jennifer. "I'm sorry I'm late."

"Sleep in?" Vala asked with a grin. "Me too."

Jennifer took one look at her friend's flushed face and sparkling eyes and snorted. "Slept in my ass."

"You do look well…rested," Teyla added with a knowing smile. "I believe the air in Atlantis is agreeing with you."

"Were you sleepy, Aunt Carolyn?" Cara asked innocently. "I bet Uncle Cam would help you sleep. He always helped me sleep when I was little." She looked at her mother for confirmation. "Why are you laughing, Mama?"

"Because Aunt Carolyn is making funny faces," Laura replied. She took Cara's hand and turned to the other women. "Are we ready?"

Cam sauntered towards them, Daniel and Teal'c in tow. "Have fun, baby." He kissed Carolyn long enough to make her blush and Jennifer snort. "They always kiss before they leave," Torrin groaned. "It's disgusting!"

"You'll be kissing girls before you know it," Cam told the boy, tossing him in the air and making him squeal.

"Uncle Cam," Cara protested. "It's tradition to kiss us before we go. It's the rule. Mama, tell him."

Laura grinned at Cam. "She speaks the truth, Cam."

"Okay then." Cam hunkered down so he could kiss Cara's cheek. "Have fun, sweetheart. I'll see you later."

"No souvenirs," Daniel said as he kissed Vala's hand. "Please don't make any enemies."

"As if I would." Vala fluttered her eyelashes and pinched Cam's arm when he snorted. "Shut up, Mitchell."

"You ladies should get going," John suggested, winking at Cam. "Shopping and all that." He offered Teyla one of his most innocent smiles when she frowned at him. "Have fun!"

"Wait!" Sam called, jogging down the stairs and coming to a stop in front of them. "I'm coming too!"

"Well damn," Cam drawled. "You're taking a day off."

"A morning, Cameron," Sam contradicted. "A morning only. I need to pick up my dress."

"Dress?" Jack asked from the bridge overhead them. "What dress?"

"It's tradition to get dressed up for a wedding, sir," Cam called up to him. "And Sam's just like any other woman."

"Exactly," Sam said in satisfaction. She didn't look up at Jack. "Are we ready to go?"

"Lead the way," Jennifer told Teyla. "We've got shopping to do!"

"Dial it up, Chuck," Torrin called out, making Cameron and Daniel laugh. He looked at them mournfully. "They always laugh when I say that."

The gate activated and Chuck signalled to the women that they could proceed. Cara waved cheerfully at Torrin. "Bye Torrin. Behave yourself while I'm gone."

John waited until the women had gone through before he turned to Cam. "I reckon it's time to pay a visit to McKay. You got time for that?"

Cam's grin was wide. "Always."

* * *

"Mills, take that device to Zelenka, would you? He can't possibly screw it up. You." Rodney pointed at a young female scientist, who jumped nervously when he eyed her. "What's your name?"

The young woman opened her mouth to speak.

"Never mind." Rodney continued. "Can you run a diagnostic on that jumper dialling device? It's been malfunctioning. Sheppard probably broke it."

"I did not break it, Rodney," John announced, strolling into the infirmary with Lily in his arms. Torrin was trotting at his side, with Cam trailing behind them. "I'm giving Mitchell here a tour. This is the mighty kingdom of Rodney McKay."

"Nice," Cam commented, looking around him. "McKay, are you still allergic to citrus?"

"Rodney can't have lemonade," Torrin said, climbing onto a stool and beginning to twirl it around. "It makes his face swell up. Hi, Cora."

"Hi." The scientist Rodney had been frightening relaxed visibly at the sight of the boy. "How are you?"

"I'm good," Torrin told her, still twirling his chair around. "We're here to pester Rodney."

"Oh you are, are you?" Rodney asked, giving John a pointed glare. "I suppose this was your idea, Sheppard?" He gave Cora a look when she smiled. "Why are you still here?"

Cora's face fell and she hurried out of the lab.

"Actually," Cam said with a grin. "It was mine." He sat in the chair next to Torrin and looked at Rodney. "How've you been, McKay?"

"Fine," Rodney said suspiciously. He turned to John, who was tickling Lily's chin. "Is he being serious? Because the last time he was here he threatened me with a lemon."

"He's turned over a new leaf," John told him. "Marriage has changed him into a girl."

"My ass it has," Cam snorted. He gestured towards the gurgling baby in John's arms. "You're the one talking nonsense to a baby!"

"Not just any baby," John said smugly. "My baby girl." He held Lily up so Cam could see her properly. "Isn't she perfect?"

"Papa says we have to kill anyone who dates Lily and bury them in a shallow grave," Torrin told Cam. "Ronon will help us."

Cam burst out laughing. "Sounds like something he'd say." He looked at Lily. "She's a looker. Like her Mama, I reckon. "

"She looks like Sheppard," Rodney protested. "Why does everyone say she's like Teyla? She's even got his hair!"

"She's got Teyla's temperament," Cam mused. "Quiet and calm."

"She's a little angel," John said proudly. He held her out to Cam. "Want to hold her?"

Cam looked panicked. "Not really. She's so tiny, Shep. What if I break her?"

"Chicken," Rodney muttered. "Even I can hold a baby."

Cam glared at him. "Hand her over here." He accepted the baby into his arms, awkwardly at first.

"Watch her head," John warned.

Cam cradled the baby and grinned when she smiled at him. He looked smugly at Rodney. "She likes me."

"Gas," Rodney said immediately. "She's probably got gas."

"She likes me," Cam repeated in delight as Lily gurgled at him. He looked up when Daniel and Lorne came into the room. "Hey, Jackson, look what I got."

"I see that," Daniel said with a smile. "Aren't you a natural."

"Who'd have thought," Cam said ruefully.

"Don't you want kids?" Lorne wondered. He caught himself when Cam looked blankly at him. "Sorry, sir. I was thinking out loud."

"No worries," Cam said mildly. He snuggled Lily closer against his chest. "Yeah, sure I do. If they were like this then there would be no problem."

"You can't mail order them," Daniel pointed out as Lorne took a seat next to Torrin. "It's not quite like getting a custom-built kitchen cabinet."

"What if they're like me?" Torrin asked, sounding slightly uncertain. "Would you like a little boy like me?"

Cam considered this a moment. "I'd be lucky to have a boy like you, Torrin."

John sent him a grateful look before picking Torrin up. "Why do you ask, buddy?"

Torrin shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe you like Lily more than me because she's your baby. Yours and Mama's."

John's jaw dropped. "Where did you get that idea?"

Torrin jerked his shoulder, a gesture that John knew he got from him. His head ducked, but Teyla's eyes peered up at him beneath the dark lashes. A surge of love swamped him and he held his son closer. "You're my son, Torrin. Lily's my baby girl, but you're my boy." He saw Cam and Daniel watching out of the corner of his eye. Lorne was listening intently beside them.

"Really?" Torrin looked slightly more cheerful. "Because I heard people talking when Lily was born about how great it was that you had your own child."

Rodney snorted from his place at his desk. "Please. You're so like Sheppard it's actually freaky in some ways."

"Thank you, Rodney." John gave Rodney a dirty look. "Don't listen to people, Torrin. They don't know sh-squat about things."

Torrin giggled. "You were going to say a bad word, Papa."

John nodded. "I was. Don't tell your mother."

"I won't," Torrin promised. "Us Sheppards have to stick together, don't we, Papa."

"We sure do, son," John agreed, kissing the top of Torrin's head. "Always."

* * *

"I wonder what they're up to," Carolyn said as she took a seat on the chair Marina held out for her. "Thank you, Marina."

The seamstress smiled shyly and nodded at her before going to the little kitchen area to fetch the soup and bread she had prepared for her visitors.

They were seated in Marina's little home, on various chairs and stools. Cara sat on the floor at Laura's feet, listening intently to the conversation around her. Vala mirrored her, sitting cross-legged at Sam's feet with her chin resting in her hands. She was clearly enjoying herself as she took her soup and bread and began to eat with relish.

"Who?" Sam asked, stretching her legs out in front of her. "Cam and Daniel?"

"To start," Carolyn replied as she accepted the bowl of soup Marina handed to her. "This smells great. What's in it?"

"It is made from tuttle root," Teyla answered, smiling at Marina as she took her own bowl. "Marina, you have gone to too much trouble."

"It is no trouble," Marina said immediately. "I love to have visitors. And I have made some decorations from the materials you left me for the tables at your wedding, Doctor."

"Really?" Jennifer sat up at the mention of the wedding. "Can I see them?"

"Perhaps you should eat first," Teyla advised with a grin at Sam and Laura.

"Mama, what's turtle root," Cara asked, frowning at her soup. "It smells like the vegetable stuff Kaunas makes in Atlantis."

"Cara!" Laura looked mortified. She sent an apologetic look at Marina. "Sorry, Marina. She tends to speak her mind."

"Wonder where she got that from," Jennifer muttered, earning herself a dig in the ribs from Laura's elbow. "Ow! That hurt!"

"Just you wait until you have a little Ronon saying the wrong thing at the wrong time," Laura said sweetly. "And then we'll see how the children mirror the parent."

"A little Ronon?" Sam snorted at the thought. "No such thing. The kid will probably be born with the dreadlocks and he'll be grunting instead of crying."

"You'll never keep him fed," Laura continued, trying desperately not to laugh at the frown on Jennifer's face. "And think of the labor pains."

"Oh God, I never thought of that," Carolyn added, catching on to the direction Sam and Laura were taking. "Imagine trying to deliver a baby Ronon."

"I believe it will be quite difficult," Teyla said gravely, although her eyes were dancing with amusement. "I imagine the labor will be very long and tiring."

"Does having a baby hurt?" Cara asked, looking at Laura. "Mama, did I hurt you when I came out of your belly button?"

"You did," Laura told her, running a hand over Cara's silky hair. "But you were worth every second of it."

"I'd love to have a baby," Vala said suddenly, making them all fall silent. "I think Daniel's children would be beautiful."

Laura couldn't help but agree with her. The combination of Daniel and Vala's DNA would be sure to produce some pretty good-looking kids. "Why don't you?"

"Because we're not married," Vala said simply. "And Daniel isn't quite ready for that."

"How do you know?" Sam asked her. "That he's not ready, I mean."

"The same way you know," Vala said cryptically to her.

Sam flushed slightly. "That's different."

"Can we get back to babies?" Cara demanded, interrupting them. "Mama, how do you make a baby? Can I have one for Christmas? Can you grow one like Teyla did? I want a brother."She was eating her soup innocently as she looked at Laura.

Laura almost choked on the bread she was eating. "Cara!" She looked to Carolyn for help. "Carolyn? Want to take this one?"

"Oh no, that's fine," Carolyn said, biting her lip to keep from laughing. "You're doing very well."

"Cara, sweetie, you can't just decide to make a baby because you want one," Laura began. She caught Jennifer's eye and glared at the grin on the doctor's face. "It takes time. And planning."

"And a Daddy." Cara said sadly. "I don't have one of those. And you need them to kiss you so you can make a baby. Mama, next time Evan kisses you ask him if he can make you a baby." She set her empty bowl on the ground and turned to Marina. "Thank you, Marina. That was lovely. May I go and play with the boys now? I want to ask them to teach me to play football so when Mama has a baby I'll be able to teach him."

"You are quite welcome," Marina said gravely to the child, noting that Laura was too dumbstruck to answer. "And of course you may go. Have fun. Don't go too far."

"Well Jesus," Laura managed to say as Cara scurried outside to find her friends. "I thought I'd have years to teach her that stuff." She glared at the rest of the group, who were laughing hysterically. "Don't you _dare _tell Evan this."

"I wouldn't," Jennifer protested between fits of laughter. "But you might want to warn him that the next time Cara catches him kissing you, she's going to demand that he make you a baby."

"You should just tell her the truth," Vala suggested, a wicked gleam in her eye. "Right after you test the theory, of course!"

"Vala!" Carolyn hissed. "We're not all like you!"

"Oh please, ""Jennifer scoffed. "Slept in, my ass." She was rewarded by Carolyn's blush. "And speaking of babies, when are you and Cam going to have some?"

"Now those would be gorgeous kids," Sam commented.

"When did this conversation stray from Jennifer delivering a twelve pound half Satedan baby?" Carolyn demanded. "Can we get back to the days of labour she'll have to endure?"

"I wonder what they are doing right now," Teyla said. She frowned suddenly as a thought struck her. "I hope they are not annoying Rodney."

* * *

"What's that for?" Torrin asked Rodney, following him around his lab. "What does that do?"

"It's for a program I'm designing to obtain maximum power from the-"

"What does this one do?" Cam, still holding Lily, asked, pointing at a machine in the far corner. "What's that button for?"

"Don't touch that!" Rodney yelped, making a dive for the machine. He glared menacingly at Cam. "Leave it alone."

"What does this device do, Dr McKay?" Teal'c asked, indicating a laptop that had wavy lines running across the screen. "Is it to measure noise and vibration, as Daniel Jackson's does?"

"It's to measure the levels of activity in the-"

"What happens if I flip this switch?" Lorne demanded from the other side of Teal'c. "Will my ATA gene do anything to it?"

"Stop thinking at it!" Rodney almost shrieked, whipping his head around to give Lorne a threatening look. "Just don't touch anything!"

"But what does this one do?" Daniel asked, his lips twitching as Rodney made a sound somewhere between a groan and a growl."

Rodney gave him a murderous look and began to make flapping motions with his hands. "Out! All of you! Out!" He lashed a hand out when John began to poke at his laptop. "Stop touching that! Don't you know the dangers of touching things like that? Especially with your genetic makeup! Damn it, Sheppard, have your years in Pegasus taught you nothing?"

He was turning red with exertion, his eyes flashing furiously at the unwelcome occupants of his lab.

"Rodney, your face is turning red," Torrin pointed out. "It's bad for your health to get riled up. Maybe you should try meditating like Mama does. I'll show you."

"You're the ringleader of this," Rodney accused, pointing at John. "You brought them here, hoping that I'd lose my temper."

"You kind of have," Daniel said mildly. He turned to Cam, who was making popping noises at an enchanted Lily. "Cam, do you get treated like this in my lab?"

"Nope," Cam answered immediately, grinning at the baby in his arms. "Jackson, you want to hold her?"

"What part of get out do you people not understand? I'm terribly busy and I need to get this work finished sometime this century."

"Oh knock it off," John told him. "Cam, give her over to Daniel. You like kids, don't you, Daniel?"

"Sure," Daniel agreed amiably, holding his arms out for Lily. "Wow." He looked down into the green eyes that were watching him intently and blinked rapidly. "Wow."

"She's something, isn't she?" John said proudly. "She's Atlantis' little princess."

"Don't let Cara hear you say that, sir," Lorne told him. "She won't like giving up her title."

"Yeah." Cam frowned slightly and took a seat in Rodney's chair, ignoring the scientist's protests. "Shut it, McKay. I'm talking." He eyed Lorne, who was starting to look uncomfortable. "We should have a little talk, don't you think?"

"Sure," Lorne said easily, in spite of the nerves tingling along his spine. He'd been waiting for this. "Want to take a walk?"

"Oh sure, now you decide to take a walk," Rodney said in disgust. "When things start to get interesting. I don't think so. You can have your man to man talk right here where I can hear it."

Teal'c gave him a look clearly designed to intimidate. "Perhaps you should mind your own business, Dr McKay."

"Perhaps," Rodney retorted. "But none of us are going to mind our own business because that's the way things work around here. You can't have any kind of a life without people knowing about it and sending five year old spies to keep tabs on you!"

"I can have this one out right here," Cam said, keeping his eyes trained on Lorne. "You got a problem, Major?"

"None," Lorne told him, squaring his shoulders. "Go right ahead, sir."

Daniel took a seat on the other side of the counter beside John and Teal'c and prepared for the show. "This is going to be good," he murmured to Lily, who gave him a gummy smile and began to gurgle happily. One little fist waved madly in the air and John reached out absently to test his daughter's tiny grip.

"Just what exactly is there between you and Laura?" Cam asked without skipping a beat. "And don't tell me nothing. I can see it. It's as plain as the nose on McKay's face."

"What's wrong with my nose?" Rodney began to pat his nose frantically. "What?"

"Yeah, it's all about you," Daniel muttered. "Why don't you just be quiet!"

"Why would I deny it, sir?" Lorne asked calmly. Don't let him see that he's intimidating you.

Cam looked slightly put off by Lorne's steady manner. "Well, don't. Out with it, Major. What is it?"

"Are you concerned that I might hurt her, sir?"

"She's been through hell," Cam began hotly. "She's had enough to deal with. And there's Cara. She's only four. I won't have you upsetting them."

"Why would I?" Lorne demanded, forgetting that Cam was his superior and seeing him only as a man challenging his relationship with Laura. "I love them."

Cam's jaw dropped. "You what?"

"I told you," Rodney said in a singsong voice. "Now can you get over it?"

"Back up," Cam ordered. "You love them?"

"Yes, sir," Lorne replied. "Is that a problem for you?"

"Hell no," Cam said, a broad grin spreading across his face. "Why didn't you say so?" He slapped Lorne on the back happily. "Just don't hurt them. Or I'll have to kill you."

"With all due respect, sir," Lorne told him, "you'd have to get in line. Jen would have my ass and so would Teyla."

"Add my wife to that list," Cam said with a grin. "She's mean when she's mad."

"That's it?" Rodney said, clearly unimpressed. "That's the showdown? That was pathetic."  
"Uncle Rodney?" Torrin cut in, tugging on Rodney's sleeve. "You're very clever, aren't you?"

"Yes, I am." Rodney looked down at him. " I am, in fact, a genius. Why?"

"How do you make a baby?"

Rodney turned bright red and looked at John, who was standing with his mouth open. "Did you put him up to this?"

"I think we should go and get some lunch," Cam said, biting back a grin. "Looks like you boys need to talk some."

"I'll go with you," Daniel said, handing Lily to John. "We'll meet you there."

"Why do you want to know?" Rodney asked Torrin, watching as Teal'c took his leave and followed Cam and Daniel out of the room. Lorne was watching them with a barely concealed grin. "Aren't you going to go too?"

"Not a chance," Lorne grinned. "I'm dying to know your answer to this one!"

"Why do you want to know how to make a baby?" Rodney repeated weakly, looking at John who had yet to respond to his son's question. "Who told you to ask me?"

"I thought you would know," Torrin said, sounding disappointed. "Papa, how did you and Mama make Lily? Can you make one for Cara? She wants a brother."

This time Lorne's jaw dropped. "What? When did she say that?"

Rodney looked smug. "Perhaps you'd like to explain to a couple of five year olds how you make a baby." He patted John's arm patronisingly. "Have fun."

"Don't you dare disappear," John warned, clamping a hand on to Rodney's arm in desperation. "What the hell do I tell him?"

"Search me," Lorne said when John looked over at him. "I'm wondering the same thing about what I'm going to tell Laura."

"Teyla!" John said the name like it was his last hope. "Teyla will know what to tell him."

"I bet Laura would help," Lorne added, nodding at his CO's suggestion.

"Help with what?" Jack asked from the doorway. "Anything I can do?"

"General Jack!" Torrin bounded over to him and looked up at the general. "How do you make a baby? "

Jack looked from the innocent face of the child to the smug face of Rodney and to the panic written all over John and Lorne. His smile was slow, but wide. "Well now. There's a question. I think we should ask someone who knows the answer to everything."

"I already told them, it's for their parents to tell them," Rodney protested.

"Believe it or not, I wasn't talking about you, McKay," Jack said with a smirk. He took Torrin's hand. "I have just the person."

"Who?" John and Lorne asked in unison.

"Daniel," Jack answered, watching as Rodney's face fell. "He always knows the answer to these questions. He'll tell you."

John heard his com unit buzz. He tapped it gratefully. "Go ahead," he called.

"Colonel Sheppard, the ladies have returned from New Athos," Chuck informed him. "They could use some help in the gate room with their stuff."

"Teyla's back." John's face lit up. "Torrin, come on. Mama's here. She'll tell you everything you want to know."

* * *

Teyla came through the gate first, smiling as she saw John waiting for her with Lily and Torrin. Sensing her mother, Lily let out a loud cry. Teyla immediately took her and cradled her against her chest, reaching up to kiss her husband.

Carolyn and Vala came through with Sam in tow, dropping their baggage on the floor with a sigh of relief. Cam immediately picked up some of the parcels after kissing his wife and stood waiting for instructions.

"Take them to the mess hall," Jennifer told him, looking around her. "Where's Ronon?"

"Here," Ronon announced. "Sorry. I was sparring." He took her hand and picked up her bag in the other.

"So I should just ask Rodney?" Cara could be heard saying as she came through the gate and stood at her mother's side. She spotted Lorne and immediately perked up. "Evan!"

"Hey, princess." Lorne caught her up and settled her on his hip. "Have fun?"

"We got table cloths," Cara told him. "And we had a nice talk with Marina."

"Hey," Laura said softly at his side. "How was your morning?"

"Interesting," Lorne said, smiling at her. "Yours?"

"The same," she replied. She tipped her face up and smiled back at him. "We're home now."

"You sure are," Lorne said, staring at her.

"Evan," Cara moaned. "You're supposed to kiss us when we come home."

Lorne obligingly kissed her cheek and placed his free hand behind Laura's head, drawing her towards him for a kiss.

"Hah!" Cara hissed at Torrin, who was making his customary gagging noises. "Now I'll have a baby too!"

"You won't!" Torrin hissed back. "Papa said that you don't just _make_ one. You have to wait for him and Mama to show Laura and Evan how!"

Stunned silence fell around the room. John turned and gave Teyla a weak smile. "Welcome home," he said. "We missed you."

"What on earth – Cara!" Laura looked at Lorne, her cheeks flaming. "What gave you the idea that Teyla and John could-"

"I want a brother," Cara insisted. "And I think that Evan would make a nice brother for me."

"But honey," Lorne began, "you don't just make a baby. There are things to consider."

"Exactly," Teyla agreed, giving her husband a look that clearly stated that they would discuss this later.

"What things?" Cara and Torrin asked in unison.

Lorne had set Cara on her feet again and she crossed to stand beside Torrin. They looked up at the assembled adults.

"What things?" Cara repeated. "Mama?"

Laura looked desperately at Lorne, who shook his head. So she blurted out the first thing that came into her head.

"Ask Rodney!"

**Please do review! It's the best Christmas present I could ask for! **


	19. Pomp and Ceremony

**Hello all. I know it's been a long time, but I've been so busy with R/L and so has my beta, but between us we're back on the case now. As always, a huge thank you to Asugar, without whom I probably would have given up long ago! **

**Also thanks to those who voted for me in the Isis Awards. Imagine my shock when RowenaR let me know that I had won first place. I'm so thrilled considering I wouldn't normally win so much as an argument if I tried! **

**I finally got on LJ as well, under the same pen name so come on over and say hi to me. Just let me know that you read Coming Back Home and I'll reply to you. You can also post ideas for a sequel to this if you feel like it's a good idea. **

**Enjoy! **

**Eva x**

**Chapter 18. Pomp and Ceremony. **

"Afternoon, folks." Jack O'Neill called out a greeting and felt the usual sense of satisfaction as he watched the entire military contingent present in the gate room of Atlantis come to attention in perfect unison. The sight of Cara and Torrin copying their salute made him smirk.

Those kids would take the Air Force by storm someday.

"Well folks, as you all know, this is a promotion ceremony for Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard and Major Evan Lorne. Seeing as how we don't have a military band here, and since this is not the usual format of promotion ceremonies, we've got some special guests to sing the national anthem."

Laura blinked in surprise as Cara and Torrin stepped forward proudly. She had heard Cara warbling to herself but had put it down to the fact that the big ceremony was the foremost topic in the city.

Sam Carter had suspended unnecessary gate travel until Jennifer and Ronon's wedding was over so that the bride could prepare without having to perform emergency surgery.

She watched Cara slip her hand into Torrin's, biting her lip and searching for her mother's face in the audience. Laura broke rank to wave quickly at her to reassure her. Cara's little face creased into a smile.

"Oh say can you see, by the dawn's early light."

The sweet childish voices rang through the room, prompting a little sigh from most of the people gathered as the airmen and marines saluted.

"What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming…"

Lorne was standing in the front row next to his CO. He watched John's face light up with pride out of the corner of his eye, he could see that Teyla was smiling next to him. He turned his attention back to Cara, who looked adorable in that pretty pink party dress she loved so much. The nerves that had been visible before she began singing had disappeared. Instinct told him that she had seen Laura in the audience and immediately calmed down.

"O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave."

Laura applauded with her colleagues as Cara and Torrin finished and took a bow, still holding hands tightly. A tear spilled over her eyelid and down her cheek. She discreetly wiped it away and watched as the children stood beside Teyla again.

"Thank you, Cara and Torrin," Jack said gravely. He looked down at the gathered personnel again. "Now, we'll get down to it."

Laura craned her neck slightly so she could see Evan, but all she could see was the back of his head as he stood ramrod straight at the front of the group. He'd been nervous about this, despite the fact that the promotion was so well deserved. With a fond smile, she recalled Evan describing Cara's attempts to make him relax the evening before.

"_Evan are you scared of getting a new name?" Cara asked suddenly, leaving the picture she was drawing and coming to sit beside Lorne on the couch. He had volunteered to baby-sit while Laura finished some reports in Rodney's lab. _

"_Maybe a little," Lorne admitted, looking down into her innocent face. "Why?" _

"_You look a little pale," Cara told him soberly. "When I'm scared, Mama sings me a song. Want me to sing it to you?" _

"_Sure," Lorne answered, swamped by a wave of love. He was head over heels for this little girl. And for her mama too, if he was honest. It was a little scary just how hard he'd fallen for Laura Cadman. He wouldn't change a thing though. _

_Cara hopped from foot to foot. "Evan, you're not listening. You're daydreaming again!" _

"_Sorry, princess," Lorne apologised. He focused all his attention on her, giving his best smile. "Go ahead. I'm ready." _

_Cara took a deep breath and folded her hands primly. Then she opened her mouth and began to sing loudly. "From the halls of Montezuma to the shores of Tripoli…" _

_Lorne's jaw dropped. The Marines hymn? Laura sang the Marines hymn to Cara when she was scared? He had to bite his lip to keep from laughing at the image of Laura teaching Cara to sing the corps' battle song, knowing that Cara would misunderstand and be hurt if he did. _

"_First to fight for right and free-dom and to keep our honor cleeeean…" Cara trilled happily. _

_Laura entered to see her daughter singing to a stunned Evan. She immediately joined in as she dropped her laptop on the kitchen table. "We are proud to claim the title of United States Ma-rines." _

"_Ooh-rah!" Cara bellowed in a manner fitting that of a drill sergeant. _

"_Ooh-rah!" Laura hollered back, grabbing her daughter in a bear hug and tickling her. "Have you been entertaining Evan?" _

"_He was scared of getting a new name, Mama," Cara explained. "And you always say Marines show no fear. So I sang him the song and now he'll have no fear like the marines!" _

_Laura stifled a laugh at the pained expression on Evan's face. She had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from dissolving helplessly into giggles at the image of Evan wearing the Marines uniform. "Now baby, you know that Evan isn't a Marine like me. He's Chair Force. Sorry, I mean the Air Force." _

_Cara studied Lorne, who was making strangled sound that might have been in agreement. It was more likely though to be disagreement, judging by his expression. "He looks kinda sick, Mama. Aren't the Chair Force as good as the Marines?" _

_Lorne glared at Laura and bit out a reply, emphasizing his words crisply. "The __**Air **__Force is every bit as good as the j__**arheads**__. Sorry, princess, I meant the Marine Corps. Just what have you been teaching her, Lieutenant?" _

"_About the Corps, sir," Laura said with a perfectly straight face. "Proud to be a Marine." She released Cara from her grasp and set her on the ground._

_Lorne gave her an annoyed look. "Did you have to teach her the Chair Force part?" _

"_I didn't," Laura protested. "That was Gates. He loves teaching her the values and principles of the Marine Corps." _

"_And you don't stop him," Lorne pointed out. He sent a mock glare at a giggling Cara. "What are you laughing at?" _

"_Nothing," Cara protested, taking a step backwards too late. Evan grabbed her and tickled her until she cried uncle._

"_Mama! Make him stop!" Cara shrieked. _

"_I don't know if I should," Laura said, with a wink at Lorne. "Did you behave while I was gone?" _

"_I did behave!" Cara gasped, wriggling furiously to get away from Lorne. "Evan, tickle Mama! She taught me the Marine song." _

"_Oh no you don't," Laura said sternly. "Don't even think about it, Major." She gave him her most steely look, usually reserved for Rodney. "Don't you dare-hey!" _

_Lorne released Cara and caught Laura up in his embrace. His tickles had turned into a kiss and another kiss until Cara's laughter made them spring apart, a little out of breath. She was clapping her hands together, clearly pleased with the latest development in their relationship. Thankfully she had let the matter of a baby brother drop after Laura had explained that people had to be married to have babies and maybe Jennifer and Ronon should have a baby first. _

Laura smiled again. She still wasn't sure how to define their relationship, if she was honest. It was a whole pile of trying to be casual but knowing that it wasn't, mixed with serious chemistry and the fear of falling in love only to be hurt again. Still, Evan's solid presence in her life was a comfort she hadn't had in years. Not since Carson.

"Attention to orders!" Sam Carter called out the command and waited for the room to assume the position. She smiled at John Sheppard and began the familiar speech. "The President of the United States, acting upon the recommendation of the Secretary of the Air Force…"

Lorne straightened his spine and listened to the words that all officers knew by heart. He had never felt more proud in his life. No promotion had meant as much as this one. He knew that John felt the same as he did.

Laura looked on as John stepped up to the makeshift podium that had been erected for the occasion. To her left, standing on the stairs, she could see Jennifer and Ronon. Rodney McKay was beaming from ear to ear on their other side. Laura followed his gaze to Major Louise Kerr, who was staring straight ahead of her as her position dictated.

"…Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard is promoted to the permanent grade of Colonel…" Sam continued, smiling at John and nodding to Teyla.

In keeping with tradition, Teyla pinned the eagles to each shoulder of John's uniform, smiling as he saluted Sam and the rest of his superiors.

Lorne took a deep breath and stepped forward, eager to have his new title read out.

"Major Evan Lorne is promoted to the permanent grade of Lieutenant Colonel…"

Lorne stared ahead of him, but searched for Laura's face in the crowd. She was looking straight at him, her hazel eyes twinkling. She winked, causing him to grin broadly.

The silver maple leaves Sam pinned onto the shoulders of his uniform had belonged to John Sheppard. He had presented them to Lorne the evening before with a grin and a firm handshake that said more than a long speech ever could.

"No need for speeches," Jack announced as they stood at attention again. "They take too long and I'm hungry."

Laura grinned along with the rest of the audience, breaking her formal pose. It was nice to know that while some parts of the ceremony would always be the same, some areas of it would be adjusted to Atlantis.

"Oh come on!" Rodney exclaimed. "You have to make a speech at least." He indicated his suit and tie. "I didn't get all dressed up for nothing!"

"I don't think that's really necessary," John began. He stopped and gave Lorne a grin. "Care to make a speech, Lorne? I can make it an order."

"You could, sir," Lorne agreed. "But I doubt you would. Wouldn't look good for you to delegate out of your first official job as a full bird Colonel."

John sighed. "No it wouldn't. Crap." He looked out at the waiting faces. "At ease. Okay. Well, I don't like speeches. I'm not like…McKay, for example." Low laughter greeted this statement. "I'm proud to be an air Force officer. And I promise to do justice to the title it has bestowed on me." He turned to Lorne." Lieutenant Colonel Lorne, care to finish it off?"

"Say _ooh rah_!" Cara piped up, prompting Laura to turn scarlet and Lorne to laugh. "It's the perfect way to finish the boring part."

"He can't say _Marine_ words," Torrin hissed back. His mother silenced him with a stern look.

"I can only echo the words of Colonel Sheppard," Lorne spoke up, feeling that these two children could start a war to rival any fought in four galaxies. "And I'd like to thank you all for coming. It means a lot to see you here, especially those of you who technically don't have to attend."

"Well said," Jack declared. He saluted them both with a grin. "You can go and kiss your wife now, Colonel. And Lieutenant Colonel Lorne, there's a little girl here who'd probably give you a kiss too." He turned back to the crowd. "Dismissed."

A round of applause broke out as Teyla tipped her face up to John's and smiled lovingly at him before he kissed her. Torrin hopped up and down at his side, waiting for his turn. He squealed delightedly when John tossed him in the air before settling him on his hip and kissing his cheek.

Lorne held a hand out to Cara without thinking. Her face lit up and she immediately came to his side and held her arms up. Cara wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek, making him feel ten feet tall.

"Congratulations, Lieutenant Colonel Lorne," Teyla said, smiling at Lorne. Her cheeks were slightly flushed. The sparkle in her eyes told him that while PDA's weren't usually her style or the Colonel's, she hadn't minded today.

Cara got his attention when she grabbed his face and stared intently at him.

"What is it, princess?"

"You don't look different," Cara said to him, her little face a mixture of disappointment and puzzlement. "You still look like you."

"Why'd you expect him to look different, Cam demanded, coming forward to nip her out of Lorne's arms and toss her in the air. "Did I look different when I got promoted?"

"I wasn't there," Cara told him. "I was too little to go. Mama said I'd have howled all the way through it."

"Howled?" Carolyn teased, touching the little girl's nose. "You? Never. You never howled."

"She howled like a baby wolf cub when Laura came back to work," Cam contradicted, setting Cara back on her feet when she wriggled to get free from his hold and ran down the hall after Torrin. "Cried every time Laura left and again when she'd come home. Don't go far ahead, honey."

"It's okay," Laura told him. "She won't get lost. She knows this city almost as well as the adults who live here. Better than some of them!"

"She seems pretty happy here," Carolyn commented. "Did she find it difficult to settle in?"

"Not a bit," Laura said with a rueful grin. "She found her footing more quickly than I did."

"And have you found it now?" Cam asked, lowering his voice so only Laura and his wife would hear.

"Are you acting like my big brother again?" Laura teased with a grin.

Cam frowned at her, looking exactly like a brother might at an annoying little sister. "Stop avoiding the question, Lieutenant." His blue eyes looked earnestly at her. "Have you?"

Laura smiled reassuringly at him. "I think so, Cam. I really think so."

* * *

Sam stood at the entrance to the mess hall, watching the festivities with a wistful smile. The room was packed with civilians and military personnel alike. The food was long gone and people were pushing the tables back so that there was enough room to dance in the middle of the floor.

An engineer was hooking up a laptop to some speakers in one corner and music was starting to blare around the room.

Torrin took Cara's hand and began to swing her around in circles, to the amusement of their parents. Sam watched as Teyla held Lily up so she could take in the scene with her wide hazel eyes. Every now and then, the baby would wave her little hands and legs and give a gummy grin to whoever caught her attention.

John bent to whisper something in Teyla's ear and she smiled up at him, her face soft.

Sam sighed. It seemed that everywhere she looked she saw happy couples.

Daniel and Vala, Cam and Carolyn, John and Teyla, Jennifer and Ronon. Even Laura and Evan Lorne were talking, heads bent close together, Lorne holding one of her hands in his.

"Not your usual promotion ceremony," Jack commented as he joined her. "But I liked it."

Sam immediately stiffened. "Yes, sir, it was a lovely afternoon." Her voice sounded stilted, even to her own ears. "You did a great job."

Jack frowned slightly. "I didn't do it alone."

"Torrin and Cara brought the house down with their singing," Sam said, trying to steer the conversation to a safer topic than the two of them working together to organise the ceremony. That had been a form of torture in itself. She had to constantly fight to keep a hold on her emotions in his presence, not wanting him to see how much he could still hurt her.

"They certainly did," Jack agreed. He looked over at where the two children were now hanging from Rodney's arms, giggling wildly and clinging when he tried to shake them off by swinging them in the air. "Who would have thought McKay was so good with kids?"

"Torrin and Cara spend most of their time tormenting him," Sam said, smiling at them. "He claims to hate it, but I think he secretly loves the attention."

"Who's the woman he's been staring at?" Jack asked curiously. "That major over there?"

"That's Major Louise Kerr," Sam answered. "She's one of the best Marines we've got here. She's great in hand to hand combat, she's got excellent leadership skills and she's keeps her head in a crisis."

"That doesn't explain why McKay keeps staring at her."

"He's dating her," Sam explained. "Or trying to, anyway. They were off-world together a while back and he's been smitten since they got back."

"McKay's got the hots for a soldier?" Jack sounded incredulous. "A brunette soldier? He usually goes for sexy blonde scientists!"

Sam laughed at that. Rodney's crush on her was well known among SGC personnel. He had made no effort to hide his admiration of her brain and her blonde hair. "People change, sir."

"Did that hurt your feelings?" Jack teased, trying to lighten the mood. The ever-present tension between them was making it difficult to do that.

"Rodney's not my type, sir."

"What's your type, Colonel?" Jack asked seriously.

It was an effort to keep her face calm as she looked up at him. _Smart-ass generals with eyes that see right into me_, she thought. Embarrassed at the direction her mind was taking, Sam smiled and moved back so that she wasn't standing so close to him. "Not Rodney, sir."

"That's not an answer, Carter," Jack shot back, grinding his teeth together in frustration. Damn her for dodging the issue every time it got serious.

"What was the question?" Sam asked lightly, relieved to see that Daniel had made his way across the room to join them. "Hello, Daniel. Having fun?"

Daniel smiled. "Fun is hardly the word for it. I didn't know they could party like this in Atlantis." He gestured to the people now dancing to Jailhouse Rock. "Who knew McKay could dance."

"He's trying to impress Major Kerr," Jack confided. "Carter here sas he's got a thing."

"I did not," Sam said with a roll of her eyes. "General O'Neill is trying to cause trouble as usual."

"Looks like he's finally gotten over his obsession with you," Daniel teased with a wink at Sam.

"Thank God," Sam said fervently. "The man's a genius, but really. Not my type at all."

"So what is your type then?" Jack repeated with a frown. "You never answered that question."

"I don't have one," Sam said evenly. Her eyes were shuttered, her face carefully blank. Damn him for trying to browbeat her into a confrontation like that in front of Daniel. She balled her hands into fists to keep from shaking some sense into him. "Excuse me, sir, Daniel. I need to talk to John."

Daniel turned to Jack and noted the way he watched Sam walk away. He spied Vala beelining for them. From the look on her face he could tell that she had spotted the exchange and had decided that she needed to get in her two cents worth.

"Hello, boys. " Vala slipped an arm through one of Daniel's and gave Jack a dazzling smile. "Daniel. General."

"Hi," Daniel smiled and kissed her cheek gently.

"Hello, Vala," Jack replied politely.

"Enjoying the party?" Vala asked him.

"Oh it's barrel of laughs so far," Jack said sarcastically. "Can't you tell?"

Vala's smile remained fixed in place, but her eyes sizzled with temper. "Look, Jack-surely I can call you Jack after all this time, can't I?"

"That depends on why you're doing it," Jack answered, arching a brow at Daniel.

"Fine" Vala's smile disappeared. She scowled. "I'm just going to come right out and say it."

"Vala," Daniel said warningly, squeezing her hand. "Don't."

"Don't what?" Jack asked mildly. Daniel recognized though that his eyes were beginning to glint with temper. "Daniel, let her speak or she'll explode."

"Okay," Daniel sighed. "But don't say I didn't try to stop her."

"Are you blind or are you just that stupid?" Vala demanded, planting a hand on her hip and eyeing Jack sternly. "Can't you see what you're doing to her?"

Jack merely put his hands behind his back and waited for her to continue. Vala was unstoppable when she set her mind on something.

"You keep hurting her over and over," Vala stormed on, poking him hard in the chest with one finger.

Daniel winced in sympathy and decided to intervene. "Vala-"

"Don't you _Vala_ me," Vala hissed at Daniel, who immediately shut his mouth. She poked Jack again. "You boys are all the same. You just use her when it's convenient for you and then drop her."

"Hold on a minute," Jack said angrily. "I never used her for anything. Sam i_sn't_ a convenience to me."

"Oh please," Vala snorted. "You keep her at arm's length and then just when she's ready to move on you reel her back in and break her heart again. And again. And again..."

"Vala." Daniel tried again. "That's-"

"True?" Vala raged. She whirled back to face Jack again. "You can't just pick her up and set her down when you feel like it. You've kept her waiting for years."

"I don't think it's any of your business." Jack's voice was cold.

"It's my business when my you continue to use her and to hurt her." Vala folded her arms defiantly to keep from poking Jack again. "What are you going to do about it?"

"What do you suggest?" Jack sounded tired. "I tried to talk to her."

"You did not," Vala contradicted. "You said you were retiring and then expected her to fall into your arms."

"How did you know that?" Daniel asked in surprise. "I didn't know that."

"Oh come on!" Vala exclaimed. "I know because Sam told me. And haven't you ever heard of intuition? I can read between the lines, you know."

"When did this happen?" Daniel turned to Jack. "Why didn't she tell me? We've been friends for years…"

"Sam doesn't tell you everything," Vala said, tapping her foot impatiently.

"Obviously, she doesn't tell you everything either," Jack shot back. "Seeing as _she _was the one who wouldn't talk to _me._"

"That's because you had your chance and you blew it because you were too much of a stubborn male." Vala said the word as if it tasted sour and stabbed a finger at Jack. "You didn't understand her then and you clearly don't understand her now."

Daniel took hold of her arm and yanked her back against his side before she could poke Jack again. "Vala, Carolyn is looking for you."

"She is not," Vala protested. "And I'm not finished. I - "

"Think you are," Daniel concluded firmly, seeing the despair on Jack's face. "Let him be," he murmured softly in her ear. "He's hurting too. Let me take this one."

Vala frowned, clearly unhappy with the idea, but she nodded and headed across the room to where Carolyn was watching them curiously. Jennifer looked just as unhappy as Vala, Daniel noticed. Even the usually serene Teyla frowned at them from her position beside the other women.

"You've got yourself quite a fan club, Jack." Daniel kept his tone light. "Care to tell an old pal what happened?"

Jack gave a heavy sigh. "Daniel, I wouldn't even know where to start."

* * *

"I know I shouldn't have interfered," Vala moaned to Jennifer and Carolyn. "But I was so angry. Sam was so devastated after your wedding."

"She told me," Jennifer said quietly. "It was really hard on her. She's still hurting because of it."

"I don't want that for her." Vala sounded cross again. "She's been a good friend to me. She helped to bring my Daniel and I together. I want her to be happy too."

"I believe that she is trying to convince herself that she does not have feelings for him," Teyla stated, shifting Lily from against her right shoulder to her left. "And I believe that she is failing."

"I'm not usually in favour of interfering," Carolyn said slowly, eyeing the other women. "But I think in this case we should just use what we know to help."

"It could backfire," Jennifer argued. She looked at the others sceptical expressions. "What? I don't interfere all the time!"

"Whatever," Carolyn laughed knowingly. "Anyway, I think that it's time to call in the big guns."

"Who are the big guns?" Jennifer sounded curious. "The men?"

"No," Carolyn replied. She looked at Lily and ran a finger across the baby's soft cheek, smiling softly as Lily gurgled up at her. "The kids."

"What about the kids?" Laura asked, overhearing the last part of Carolyn's statement as she wandered over to join them. Her face was flushed becomingly from the heat in the room and her hazel eyes sparkled. "What have they done now?"

"Can we use Cara to match-make?" Vala asked her, gesturing to where Daniel and Jack were still talking quietly near the doorway.  
Laura looked where she was pointing and was baffled. "You want to use Cara to get together General O'Neill and Daniel? Is this some sort of alternate universe?"

Vala's answer was a snort of laughter and a roll of her eyes. "Not even I am that twisted! Between Jack and Sam!"

Laura looked at Jack and Daniel again, this time with more interest. "Are you sure that's wise?"

"Can't make things any worse," Jennifer mused. She looked at Teyla. "What do you think?"

Teyla considered a moment before nodding in agreement. "But if it appears to be a bad idea we must not continue."

"I'm in," Carolyn added happily. She looked at the men across from them. Cam was talking animatedly to John, both men chuckling at something he had said. Lorne was alternating between tossing Torrin and Cara high in the air. The sounds of the children squealing gleefully and the men's laughter mingled with the music coming from the speakers and the hum of conversation as people chatted among themselves.

"What are you looking at?" Jennifer asked her.

Carolyn smiled. "It's like another world here," she replied. "Not at all what it used to be like."

"It's better now," Jennifer said with a smile. "Look at all the families. It's more like a home."

"Stop getting soppy," Vala ordered briskly. "We have a strategy to put together."

The others erupted into laughter and put their heads together. Vala was quite right. They had plans to make.

**I know it's been a long time, but please review! I promise I have more chapters coming!**


	20. Wedding Jitters, Anyone?

**I'm baaaa-ack!! SOrry, sorry so sorry, I've been terribly busy and I didn't want to leave a dreaded author's note chapter cos I hate those. Getting hopes up and then nothing but a "Sorry, I'll be updating as soon as possible!" Anyhoo, here it is. And the good news is that Chapter 21 is ready to post and will be posted early next week! **

**Thanks as usual to Asugar for her fantastic beta work. Also, those of you who like Lorne/Cadman stories, check out the community over on LJ. It's called Major Explosions and along with the fabulous RowenaR, there are loads of Lorne and Cadman treats for all. **

**I'm also on LJ, under my pen name, Evaflack001, so pop over and say hello. Just let me know you're from ff please!  
**

**Enjoy!!  
**

**Chapter 20. Wedding Jitters, Anyone?"**

"Check that out," Cam said, elbowing John in the ribs to get his attention. The two men were having a cup of coffee in the mess hall. "Look at those kids harassing McKay. It's genius."

John looked across the mess hall to where Torrin and Cara were sitting in chairs on either side of a cranky Rodney. The children seemed to be bombarding him with questions. While Cara held his attention, Torrin would sneak a piece of his bacon. As soon as Rodney turned to look at Torrin, the boy would then ask him a question, prompting Cara to whip her hand out and snag a piece of his fruit to pop in her mouth.

"I taught Torrin that trick when he was four," John said proudly. "He's passing his wisdom on to Cara. She catches on pretty fast."

"That's my girl," Cam said happily, watching as Cara gave Rodney an innocent smile when he frowned suspiciously at her. "I have to get her to do that to Jackson. Who's that?" He jerked his head towards a slim brunette that Torrin had hopped off his chair to drag towards Rodney.

"Who?" John craned his neck to see where Cam was looking. A wicked and knowing smile spread across his face. "That marine over there?"

"That pretty one that Torrin latched on to."

"That's Major Kerr," John answered, still grinning widely. "Come on, Mitchell, Torrin gave you guys the scoop on her the night you arrived."

"That's the girl McKay had breakfast with?" Cam looked curiously at the woman. "The one who actually makes him shut up for five minutes?"

"That's the one," John confirmed. "She's a damn good marine. She's a hardcore jarhead, like Cadman, but not the worst under my command. She's got good instincts – "

"Obviously not, if she's letting McKay make time with her," Cam joked.

"Rodney's not the worst person in the world," John told him. "Although if you tell him I said that I'll flatly deny it. "

"I'd like to meet this Major Kerr," Cam said, tapping a finger against his chin consideringly. "I wonder what she sees in him." He shared a wicked grin with John. "I could interview her a little. Find out what she thinks of the place." His grin grew wider. "And the people in it, of course."

John considered this a moment and looked devilish. "What the hell. Let's go have some fun."

* * *

"Louise, are you going to the wedding?" Cara asked. "Do you get to wear a dress? Is it like mine? Are you going to wear pretty flowers in your hair like Jennifer?"

Louise Kerr smiled at the child. "I sure am going to the wedding. I have a dress that I brought with me from home. And I'm positive that it won't be nearly as pretty as yours."

Torrin whispered loudly to Rodney. "You're supposed to tell her that she'll still be the prettiest girl there. Rodney! Tell her!"

Rodney turned bright red and muttered something about kids and big mouths. Torrin offered

a guileless grin to Louise. "I think you'll be pretty. Not as pretty as my mama. But you'll be pretty."

"Thank you, Torrin," Louise answered, choking back a laugh. She looked at Rodney. "Do you think I'll be pretty, Rodney?"

The scientist briefly looked panicked, but he recovered quickly and responded in a heart tone. "Yes. Absolutely. Very pretty."

"Thank you," Louise replied, giving him a beaming smile. She surged to her feet as John and Cam approached the table. "Colonels."

Rodney rolled his eyes. "At least this time there are only two of them. It won't take all day for you all to greet each other!"

"Major," John said cheerfully, giving her a wide smile. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Cameron nod to her as he stood at his side. "As you were, Major. How are you?"

Louise immediately sat down again and nodded at them. "Fine, thank you sir."

"This is Colonel Mitchell," John told her, gesturing to Cam. "Colonel, meet Major Kerr."

"Pleasure to meet you, Colonel," Louise said politely, getting to her feet to salute Cam.

"Likewise, Major." Cam returned the salute. "Take a seat." He smiled widely at Rodney. "We'll join you."

Rodney looked panicked again as John and Cameron smoothly lifted Torrin and Cara from their seats sat down with the children in their laps. They stared expectantly at Rodney.

"Why are you two here?" the scientist asked rudely. "What do you want now?"

"Rodney!" Louise Kerr hissed quellingly at him. "Have your manners completely deserted you? She smiled politely at John and Cam. "Sorry, sirs. He doesn't mean to be like that."

"He does," Torrin declared. "He's always trying to get us to go away when we try to eat with him."

"That's because you steal all my food!" Rodney exclaimed indignantly. "And don't think I don't know who taught you to do that!"

"Good morning, gentlemen," Teyla greeted them all as she came up to their table. Lily was in her sling against her chest. "Hello, Major Kerr. How is your leg?"

"Better," Louise smiled, gesturing towards the offending limb. "Between Dr Keller's surgery to repair the tear in the artery and that Ancient healing device Rodney here used on me, I'd say it knocked a couple of weeks off my recovery time."

Rodney smiled smugly at John and Cam. "I am a genius. The finest mind in two galaxies, in fact." He raised his chin proudly. "We have been know to be useful on more than one occasion."

"So, Major Kerr," Cam began, ignoring the scientist and focusing all his attention on Louise. "How long have you been posted here?"

"About a year now, sir," Louise answered cheerfully and beamed warmly at Rodney with her big brown eyes. "Rodney kindly accompanied my team on our first off-world trip when we needed a scientist. He was very…"

"Annoying?" John supplied helpfully as he got up and give his chair to Teyla. With Torrin on his hip he dragged another one to the table so that he could sit next to her. He settled back down with Torrin in his lap.

"I was going to say helpful," Louise answered smartly. "But yes, he was annoying at times."

"I'll bet," Cam muttered, rolling his eyes.

"I was not annoying at all," Rodney protested, directing an injured look at Louise. "I was vital to that mission. Who got you all out of that hostage situation when you all going to be killed?"

"Captain Timmons," Louise retorted with a roll of her eyes. Rodney visibly bristled and she relented. "Okay, okay, Rodney. You were key to the success of the mission."

Rodney sniffed. "Thank you."

"But he _is_ extremely annoying," Cam put in, ignoring Rodney's splutter of outrage at this insult. "Major, can you tell me what any sane woman might see in Doctor McKay?"

"I can't exactly put my finger on it, sir," Louise answered calmly. "All I can tell you is that he's not as bad as he seems. "

"Really?" John pretended to be amazed. "He's not?"

"Well," Louise said thoughtfully, tapping a finger against her chin. "He is quite whiny at times."

"I do not whine!" Rodney exclaimed. He looked hurt. "That's not nice."

"I'm teasing you, Rodney," Louise explained patiently. She turned back to John and Cameron. "He really isn't as bad as he seems, sirs."

"Are you sure you didn't hurt your head on that last mission?" Cam asked suspiciously.

"Very sure, sir," Louise confirmed with a laugh. She took Rodney's hand in hers and squeezed lightly. "He's a perfect gentleman."

"Wow," John said, grinning at them. "You must have it bad, Major."

"Maybe he's got it worse, sir," Louise retorted.

"Maybe you could all stop talking about me as if I'm not here," Rodney snapped out crossly. "And don't you two have a bachelor party to go organize?"

John and Cam looked at each other. "I never thought of that," John mused. "Are we supposed to have a bachelor's party?"

"Oh for God's sake," Rodney muttered in disgust. "I would have thought that his best man would have at least organised a bachelor's party."

"It's not like there's strippers on Atlantis," Louise put in, biting her lip as John's eyebrows shot up. "Sorry, sir. Just a thought."

"Thank you, Major," John said pointedly. "I'll bear that in mind."

"What's a bachelor's party?" Torrin asked. "Is it like a boy's-only party? Can we go, too?"

"I'm not a boy," Cara said, clearly horrified at the idea. "I don't want to go. Can't we have a girl's-only party, Teyla?"

Teyla, who had remained quiet throughout the conversation, smiled at the child and nodded. "We have already arranged it. It is to be tomorrow evening. I believe it will help keep Jennifer occupied the night before she is to be married."

"I want to go to the girls' party," Cara said immediately. "I think Lily and me should go too."

"You need to ask permission to attend, sweetheart," Cam told her gently. "And you should say Lily and I, not Lily and me."

Cara's face fell, but she nodded obediently before turning beseeching eyes to Teyla. "May I go with you, Teyla?"

"If your mother allows it, you may attend," Teyla promised her, smiling as Cara perked up instantly.

"Shep, we can't be beaten by the girls," Cam decided. "We need to organise a party for Ronon."

"Agreed," John said. He set Torrin back on his feet and stood up. Louise quickly rose to her feet. "As you were, Major."

"Wait! Where are you going?" Rodney asked. "Don't you want my help? I can arrange things too. I'm the guy who always has to save your ass at the last minute! "

"Major, would you mind if we borrowed him?" John asked, standing behind Teyla with one hand on his wife's shoulder. "I promise we'll return him to you in one piece. Just in time to escort you to the wedding."

"Be my guest, sir," Louise answered with a warm smile. "But could you make him _ask_ me to the wedding first?"

"You mean you haven't asked her?" Cam said, in disbelief and disgust. "McKay, that's just pathetic."

"McKay, ask her to the wedding," John ordered, ignoring his wife's restraining hand on his. "Come on, Rodney. Hop to it. We don't have all day."

Rodney was scarlet with embarrassment, but obediently turned to Louise, whose eyes were sparkling at him with amusement. He spoke very quickly. "Wouldyouliketogototheweddingwithme?"

"McKay, not even Jackson could decipher what you just said," Cam commented. "Try again."

"Colonel Mitchell, John, perhaps you should leave Rodney to his task and go see where Evan is," Teyla said, feeling that the men had tormented Rodney enough. "Cara, you may come with me. Torrin, you may go with your father and Colonel Mitchell." She rose to her feet and stroked Lily's dark hair gently, smiling at her little daughter as she mewled softly and snuggled closer to her mother's warm body.

"Want me to take Lily?" John asked eagerly, leaning over to kiss Lily's soft cheek. "Hey, baby. Did you miss Daddy?"

"No, I will keep her with me for now," Teyla replied, subtly prodding John in the side. "John, you should take your son with you and leave Rodney alone. And Colonel Mitchell, I am sure Carolyn would say the same if she were present."

"I hate to contradict a lady, but I'm going to have to disagree there, Teyla." Cam gave her a cheeky grin.. "Carolyn'd dig in her heels so she could listen to McKay muddle through that again."

Teyla merely had to look pointedly at the men until they relented and left with a chattering Torrin in tow. "Come along, Cara." She held out her hand to the child. "Let's go and see where your mother and Colonel Carter are."

She courteously took her leave and lead Cara away, pausing at the next table to talk to Daniel and Vala.

Louise turned back to Rodney and arched a brow at him. "You were saying?" she prodded.

Rodney took a very deep breath and exhaled. "Would you do me the honour of being my date for the wedding?"

"Yes, I'd love to," Louise answered immediately. She laughed at his shocked look. "Did you really expect me to say no?"

"Yes," Rodney admitted honestly. He gave her a hesitant smile and looked nervous, almost as if he expected her to change her mind again. "Well then. I should, ah, get moving. Party to organise and all that." He gave her a wider smile. "I'll talk to you soon, I hope."  
Louise leaned over and kissed him firmly on the mouth. "Yes, you will." She laughed again at his startled face. "Bye Rodney." She gave him a little shove towards the door and waggled her fingers in farewell at him. "Have fun."

* * *

"I love parties," Vala confided to Jennifer the following night as they sat around the table in Sam's quarters, picking at peanuts and drinking the Athosian wine that Teyla had provided. She held out her glass for a refill. "That's bloody good stuff, Teyla."

"Maybe you should take it easy on that," Carolyn said, holding her hands up when Vala glared at her. "Okay, go ahead. But I'm not dishing out any prescriptions tomorrow when Jen is too busy getting ready."

"I can handle my liquor," Vala countered. "You were the one who had too much to drink the night before your wedding."

"Don't remind me," Carolyn groaned. "I thought I'd never recover and Cameron laughed at me for a week!"

"Did you have a party before you got married?" Cara, sitting in Laura's lap and sipping juice, asked Teyla. "I wasn't here then."

"I did," Teyla confirmed with a smile. "It was very entertaining."

"You watched as we all drank the wine," Jennifer said, pointing at Teyla. "I'm sure you found it all very funny!"

"You are a fine singer," Teyla replied, a mischievous glint in her amber eyes. "You and Dr Biro sang a wonderful duet!"

Jennifer moaned at the recollection. "Don't!" She gestured to her glass of water. "Why do you think I'm sticking to water tonight!"

"Because you don't want to look like a hag tomorrow?" Laura reminded her helpfully.

"Thank you, Dynamite!" Jennifer said sarcastically. "Just remember that you're going to be in the pictures too and I don't want you destroying my wedding album!"

"It's going to be a damn fine looking wedding party," Laura said, grabbing a handful of peanuts and popping them in her mouth. She held out the dish to Cara, who picked delicately at one before wrinkling her nose and resting her head on her mother's shoulder, content to listen to the women talk.

Laura had briefly questioned the wisdom of allowing Cara to be part of an adult event, but Jennifer had pleaded with her to allow her to come. The little girl had promised solemnly to be good and not cause any trouble and as usual, Laura had been helpless to resist her daughter's blue eyes and wide smile. She snuggled happily in her mother's lap, rubbing at her eyes but fighting to stay awake.

Laura looked at Jennifer, wondering how she could be so calm and so laid back the night before her wedding. The doctor's face glowed, her eyes sparkled and she was smiling almost non-stop. Now and again she touched her ring and her smile deepened.

Stroking a hand down Cara's soft curls and watching her blue eyes grow heavier and heavier with sleep, Laura allowed herself to dream for one moment about her own wedding. She hadn't told anybody that she'd picked her dress out and tried it on before Carson died. Not even Carolyn knew. She'd never gone back to the dressmaker, unable to face the reminder of what could have been. She had focused instead on the baby she was carrying and poured everything she could give into taking care of herself for their child's sake.

"Yoo-hoo!" Vala waved a hand at Laura. "Earth to Laura!"

"Sorry, " Laura smiled at them. "I was daydreaming."

"Vala was prying," Carolyn told her with a wry smile.

"I was not!"

"You were," Carolyn insisted, elbowing the injured looking Vala. "You were about to ask her how things are going with Evan."

"And now you've done it instead," Vala said triumphantly. "So now it's you who's prying." She turned expectant eyes to Laura. "So?"

"So?" Laura feigned innocence and looked down at the now sleeping Cara.

"She's asleep," Jennifer pointed out, leaning forward. "And it's the first chance we've had to get the scoop."

"I agree." Sam, who had been quiet up to now, spoke up. "Let's hear it, Lieutenant. And don't think I won't make that an order."

"Thank you, ma'am," Laura said dryly. "I appreciate that."

"I am curious also," Teyla spoke up. She looked behind her chair to where Lily was sleeping in the portable crib John had set up for her earlier. "I have noticed a change in you."

"You seem…closer, somehow," Sam agreed. "It's good to see you both happy."

"I am happy," Laura admitted, absently stroking Cara's hair. "And Cara loves him like a father."

"That part is hard for you," Carolyn guessed, her shrewd brown eyes noting the slight tightening of Laura's jaw. "Evan being a father figure to her?"

"Yes," Laura sighed. "I have such strong feelings for him. I'm just not sure what they are."

"Love?" Vala offered softly. When Laura just looked at her, she shrugged. "Sometimes you never see it coming."

"I don't know," Laura repeated. "Everything's happened so fast. I thought I'd mourn Carson forever. That I would hurt forever. Then I came back and Evan…well, he was just there all of a sudden."

"That's the way he is," Jennifer told her. "He doesn't fall easily, but when he does, he falls hard and deep. He loves you."

"I know," Laura said, the words making her smile automatically. "I know. But I'm not ready to say it to him."

"Then wait until you are," Carolyn advised, squeezing her hand. "He's worth it."

"Just don't wait too long," Sam said quietly. "Because then it just ends up being a painful mess."

Laura smiled sympathetically. "Ma'am, permission to speak freely?"

"We're off duty," Sam reminded her with a smile. "Go ahead. And don't call me ma'am."

"Why don't you just corner the general and talk to him?" Laura asked, watching as Sam's face went white. "I'm sorry, I was out of line. I was just trying to-"

"I know," Sam interrupted quickly. She considered a moment. "I guess I'm scared."

"Of what?" Carolyn asked.

"Of his answer," Vala said softly. She looked at Sam. "Right?"

"Yes," Sam admitted. "What if he's tired of it all? What if he doesn't feel the same anymore?" She shrugged, but the sadness was evident in her blue eyes. "What if he doesn't mean it and I get hurt again?"

"Sam," Laura began, hoping that her superior officer's leniency would continue. "I think that the last time he was here proved that he does feel the same and he's afraid to talk to you for the same reasons you're afraid to talk to him!" She frowned. "Well, not quite the same reasons, but you get the idea."

"I agree," Teyla said firmly. She reached out to squeeze Sam's hand. "Sometimes the risk you take when you admit your feelings is worth it."

"She's right," Carolyn said, smiling to herself as she thought of her husband. "Sometimes it's totally worth it."

"Besides," Vala chimed in, trying to lighten the mood. "Think of what would come from years and years of tension between you two coming to a head, so to speak."

That did it. Laura began to giggle at the mixture of shock and intrigue on Sam's face. Before long, all six women were laughing hysterically. The noise woke Cara, who blinked sleepy blue eyes at them asking her mother with a tired smile.

"Is it time to put on my princess dress?"

* * *

"I bet they're talking about us," John said, handing Rodney a bottle of beer and putting his legs up on the table with a satisfied sigh. He took a long pull from his own bottle. "I bet most of what they're saying's not good."

"The women're probably planning something," Rodney agreed.

"Like what?" Jack had his legs up on one of the chairs across from John. The men had chosen the corner of the mess hall for their own gathering.

Ronon had refused point blank to have a bachelor party, claiming that he didn't trust any of them not to do something despicable to him. Instead they had settled for a corner of the mess and a crate of beer. They also had to make do with chips and peanuts instead of pizza, much to Jack's disgust.

"Like shaving his eyebrows?" Cam said, glaring at John. "I recall you threatening to do that to me the night before I got married."

"I did not," John contradicted lazily. "You're losing your mind in your old age."

Cam tossed a potato chip at him. "Don't push your luck. I'm not that much older than you, Sheppard.

"I would not care to see Dr Mitchell's face if you had succeeded in doing so," Teal'c said calmly. He looked to John, who was nodded his agreement and took another gulp of his beer.

"My wife is indeed a force of nature," Cam said proudly. "She can bring a man to his knees with one look."

"I wouldn't dare to cross her," Daniel agreed. Torrin sat at his feet, playing with a toy car. He raced it around them, using the chair legs and their feet as obstacles.

"You tried once," Cam remembered, a grin spreading across his face. "You looked like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar when she stared you down."

"Then Vala sided with her," Daniel said ruefully. "I've still got the scars."

""Ouch," John said sympathetically. "I bet that one hurt."

"Vala can be temperamental," Daniel conceded. "But she's always got my back. That's one of the best things about her."

"We're still waiting for her to reveal more of the good stuff," Cam teased. "Jackson swears she's not as bad as she seems."

"She's not," Daniel insisted, sending Cam a wide grin. "She's worth all the trouble."

"Oh please," Cam scoffed. "Need to know basis, Jackson."

"I bet she's hard to control." Jack popped the top off another bottle. "How do you get her to behave?"

"I don't," Daniel said simply. "I gave up trying."

"It'd turn a man grey haired and simple," Cam said. "There's no point in trying to control a woman. It'd be like trying to wrestle a damn tornado."

"I'm not so sure," Ronon said quietly. The Satedan had sat silently while the others talked, content to listen and take everything in. "Sometimes you can if you're sneaky about it."

"Sneaky?" Rodney sounded interested. "How?"

"You have to let them think that they're winning," Ronon said. "Jennifer is stubborn, but I can get around her. I just let her think my idea was hers. She wins. I win."

"Nice," John laughed, tipping his bottle at Ronon. "I'm lucky my wife is so reasonable."

"Teyla has you wrapped around her little finger and you know it," Rodney scoffed. "You're just putty in her hands. "  
"Like you're any better with Major Kerr?" John shot back.

"What's the deal there?" Lorne asked curiously. "You two got something going on?"

"She kissed him yesterday, right on the lips," Torrin announced. "At that table over there. Cara saw it."

"Really, McKay?" Jack sounded amused. "Nice going."

"It's none of your business," Rodney answered immediately, folding his arms defiantly.

"Awh, come on, McKay," Cam cajoled, winking at John. "We've all shared. It's your turn now."

"Yeah, but you're all married," Rodney said defensively. "I'm not."

"I'm not married," Daniel pointed out cheerfully. "And I shared."

"What is this?" Rodney demanded. "Middle school?" He pointed at Lorne. "He didn't have to share."

"That's because we all know he's head over heels for Cadman and her little girl." John held back a grin as Lorne blushed.

"Now Sheppard," Jack said mildly. "Leave Lorne alone. His life's complicated enough without you razzing him."

"Laura and Cara aren't complications," Lorne growled immediately. He then remembered just who he was talking to and the flush on his cheeks grew darker. "Sorry, sir. No disrespect intended."

"None taken," Jack said airily. "I was just testing you."

"I knew he'd do that eventually," Daniel said to Teal'c. "He always does that."

"It was indeed inevitable," Teal'c agreed smoothly. He looked at Lorne. "I believe that you answered the question correctly, Major."

"Lieutenant Colonel," Cam corrected with a wink at Lorne. "He's Lieutenant Colonel Lorne now."

"My apologies, Lieutenant Colonel Lorne," Teal'c said, nodding at Lorne.

"Evan will be fine," Lorne replied.

Teal'c inclined his head courteously and settled back against the seat.

"Any nerves?" Cam asked Ronon curiously. "Because I've got to say, you don't look nervous."

"Why would I be nervous?" Ronon asked in his typical blunt fashion.

"Because you're getting married tomorrow!" Rodney exclaimed. "You're getting the old ball and chain, taking the gigantic leap into the fiery pits of matrimony, saying I do when it really means you're going to be the one not in charge for the rest of your natural lives. You're binding yourself to one person forever! You're – "

"Thank you, Rodney," John interrupted the litany, seeing Ronon's eyebrows shoot up. "That's a great description of marriage."

"Well, how would you describe it then, Mr Marriage Expert?" Rodney demanded, rolling his eyes at John.

John considered a moment and turned to Cam. "Some help?"

"Marriage," Cam began slowly. "Marriage…"

"It's…" John waved his hands in the air, struggling to find words. "It's about…"

"Kissing!" Torrin piped up helpfully. "It's about kissing and making babies!"

"That's just the fun part," Lorne joked, grinning at Daniel. "Right, Colonel?"

"Let's not corrupt my son," John said, easily picturing Teyla's outrage if she knew the current tone of their conversation.

"I believe marriage is about finding a partner in life," Teal'c said. "It is about trusting one person and spending the remainder of your life making them happy and fulfilled in every way."

"Wow." Jack stared at the Jaffa. "That was good."

"Really good," Lorne added, impressed. "You sell it much better than McKay."

"That would not be difficult," Teal'c replied. "He only thinks of marriage as a curse." He turned to Ronon. "I believe that you will find it to be a blessing. I wish you good luck, Ronon Dex."

"You'll need it," Rodney muttered under his breath, earning himself deadly glares from John and Cam. "Marriage makes you soft."

"Marriage is about thinking before you speak," Daniel offered. "Because you know that she's right."

"Even when she isn't," Jack finished, grinning. "Oh yeah. Women are strange creatures."

"Hard to read," Lorne agreed, thinking of Laura. "But worth the effort."

Nobody argued with him, not even Rodney.

"Okay," John sighed. "I guess as it's my duty as best man to make some sort of speech now." He took a gulp of his beer. "I hate speeches."

"Suck it up," Cam suggested, grinning when John grimaced at him. "Think of the speech you've got to make tomorrow!"

"Yeah." John gave another heavy sigh. He caught Ronon's smirk and straightened up in his seat. "Anyway, I guess we all know why we're here. The big guy here is getting married tomorrow and we all want to wish him the best."

"Thanks," Ronon responded, his smirk widening. "Keep going."

John frowned but continued. " So, as his best man, I just wanted to say good luck. And I think that you'll all join me."  
"You said that already," Rodney pointed out. "Kick it up a notch, Sheppard."

"Thank you, Rodney." John glared at the scientist. "If you think you can do better then you make the speech!"

"How about I end all of them with this one," Ronon suggested. "Thank you. All of you. Means a lot."

"See!" John pointed at Ronon. "Now that was a speech!"

* * *

"So as one of Jen's bridesmaids and friends, I just want to wish her and Ronon all the happiness in the world," Laura finished, raising her glass to Jennifer's in a toast. She grinned at Teyla. "I hope they have many bouncing Satedan children."

"Thank you," Jennifer said dryly. She smiled at the group of women surrounding her. "All of you." She tipped her head to the side. "You know, I thought I'd cry more. But I'm just too happy to cry!"

"Gag," Sam teased, tossing a cushion at her. "Don't make us all ill!"

"I'll try to restrain myself," Jennifer retorted. "Thank you all for being such a help with the wedding."

"It was our pleasure," Teyla told her. "As you say on Earth, what are friends for?"

"For getting her to bed early so she doesn't look like a hag tomorrow," Carolyn cut in. She glanced at her watch. "Come on. Bed, Mrs Dex."

Jennifer sighed happily. "Sounds good to me."

"Why don't we swing by the mess and see what the boys are up to," Vala suggested, a wicked gleam in her bright blue eyes.

"Why would we do that?" Jennifer was puzzled.

Laura's eyes lit up. "Why not?"

"It's traditional to keep the bride and groom apart the night before the wedding," Sam declared, frowning at Vala. "You don't want to mess with tradition."

"Pah!" Vala waved a hand at Sam. "They're getting married on a military base in another galaxy. Tradition be hanged, I say. Who's with me?" She was standing now, pumping one fist in the air.

"I'll go," Cara piped up from where she was curled up on the makeshift bed Sam had prepared for her earlier. "I want to see Evan."

"Bet she's not the only one," Vala said in a sing song voice, casting a teasing look at Laura, who only shook her head back.

"We could surprise them," Carolyn said slowly in consideration. "See what kind of trouble they've gotten up to."

"I believe Lily would like to see her father," Teyla added, nodding towards the baby sleeping in her arms. "And I must admit to wanting to say goodnight to Torrin. And John."

"Oh for God's sake!" Carolyn threw her hands in the air and relented. "Fine. Let's go and break up the guys party."  
Sam frowned and remained seated as the others got to their feet and looked expectantly at her. "Fine." She gave a resigned sigh and reluctantly followed them.

* * *

"Somebody should sing something drunken and inappropriate," John announced. "It's a bachelor's party for pete's sake. We're way too sober and well behaved."

"That's 'cause the General is sitting here watching us," Cam told him. "Anyway, it'd get back to the girl and we'd be in the doghouse for sure."

"He's got a point," Lorne said lazily. "Singing would take too much effort anyway."

"I'm with Lorne," Jack agreed. "Besides, none of you can sing."

"I can," Rodney exclaimed. "I happen to have a fine singing voice."

"You should serenade Louise Kerr then," Daniel suggested with a wide smile for the scientist. "I'm sure she'd think it very romantic."

Rodney opened his mouth to retort and yelped as Ronon kicked at his chair, nearly knocking it over. "Hey! I could have hurt myself."

"You would not," Ronon argued back. "You'd just have hit your head."

"Which would have hurt!" Rodney glared at him. "Just because you don't need the brain cells you lose every time you get yourself stunned or knocked out doesn't mean I don't want all of mine. Brain cells don't regenerate, you know. Once they're gone you don't get them back."

"Your point being?" Daniel asked mildly.

"That he," Rodney stabbed a finger at Ronon, "doesn't need his brains. He's got brawn. I need my brain cells and you should all be extremely careful not to diminish them in any way, especially since I'm the one who saves the city every time one of you screws up."

"Wow." Cam stared disbelievingly at him. "You have to be the most paranoid human-being I've ever met."

"I'm just telling it like it is." Rodney folded his arms and glared at them all.

Some sixth sense that he was being watched made Lorne turn towards the door. Cara's little face peeked in at them. When she caught his eye, she ran to him happily. "Evan!"

"Hey, princess," Lorne's eyes lit up as he pulled her onto his lap and kissed her cheek. "What are you doing up?"

"We came to bust this party up," Cara informed them all gravely. "Where is Torrin?" she asked as she looked for her friend. "Is he asleep?"

"I am not asleep," Torrin cried from under Teal'c's chair. His voice was husky from sleep. "What are you doing here? You're a girl. You can't be here with the boys."

"Mama's here," Cara shot back, poking her tongue out at him. "So is Aunt Jennifer. And Aunt Carolyn. They're right behind me. I came ahead to check out the terrain."

"That's my girl," Lorne laughed. "You'll make a great recon marine someday."

"Bite your tongue, Lorne," Cam ordered immediately. "Cara's going to be a pilot, aren't you, sweetheart?"

"I'm not going to be a pilot," Cara told him. "I'm going to be a Doctor Beckett, like Daddy." She turned to Lorne and gave him an innocent smile. "Evan, why don't you and mama have a baby so she can be a pilot like you!"

Lorne sat speechless and looked at Laura, who smiled and shook her head, eyes sparkling at him.

"You walked into that one," Cam said under his breath to Lorne, snorting with laughter. He perked up when he spied his wife strolling into the room with Jennifer. "Hey, honey. What are you doing here?"

"Checking up on you," Carolyn answered cheerfully, nestling into his lap and taking a swig of his beer. She planted a kiss on his cheek." Hi, flyboy."

"Hi there." Daniel smiled at Vala. "Were you checking up on me too?"

"No," Vala answered. "I'm kidnapping you and carrying you off to my bed." She winked suggestively at him. "It's late. I need my beauty sleep." She raised an offended eyebrow when he nodded in agreement.

"No you don't need any beauty sleep," Daniel immediately argued instead, backpedaling. "Not one minute of it."

"That's more like it."

"Lily has missed you," Teyla was saying to John, who merely pulled them both into his lap in response.

"I wanted to see what you were doing," Jennifer told Ronon when he looked up at her.

"We were talking about you," Ronon answered, rubbing his thumb along the back of Jennifer's hand. "Shouldn't you be covered in face cream and hair curlers?"

"We did that already," Laura answered him. "We're all pretty now."

"You were pretty before," Lorne pointed out with a grin. "All of you."

"Isn't he a darling?" Vala cooed, delighted when he winked back at her. "Evan, I do believe you're a charmer."

"Lorne, you're showing the rest of us up," John said, kicking Lorne's shin with his booted foot and smiling when Lorne grunted in pain.

"But sir, they were all pretty before," Lorne protested, rubbing his injured shin. "Do you want me to lie?"

"John, you should leave Evan alone," Teyla scolded, slapping at her husband's hand. "It is not polite to kick anybody. Think of the example you are setting for our son."

"Shame on you," Cam smirked at John, who grumbled at him under his breath. He caught his wife's eye and immediately subsided.

"I don't hear you giving me compliments," Carolyn said pointedly. "Or any of the rest of you men," she added, giving them all a steely glare.

A chorus of mumbled compliments resounded around the room and Carolyn nodded in satisfaction. "That's more like it. Mitchell!" She slapped at his shoulder as she got to her feet.

"Yes, ma'am?" Cam sat up in his chair and looked expectantly at her.

"Bed."

"Yes, ma'am!"

Vala sighed as they bid the group goodnight and left the mess hall. "That never works for me." She tugged on Daniel's hand and fluttered her eyelashes. "Daniel? Bed?"

"Yes, ma'am," Daniel answered with a laugh. "Whatever you say!"

John looked hopefully at Teyla, who burst into laughter. "John?"

"Yes, ma'am?" John gave her his most charming smile.

"Please pick Torrin up from the floor. It is late and he needs to go to bed."

"Yes ma'am," John grumbled, but he was smiling as he carefully set Teyla on her feet and picked his son up from the floor. He pressed a kiss to Torrin's dark hair. "Come on, buddy. Let's get you to bed."

"Good night." Teyla addressed them all with a regal sweep of her head and followed Daniel and Vala out of the room.

Within a few minutes, everyone else had made thier various excuses left the room except for Laura and Lorne. Cara had fallen asleep in Lorne's lap and was clutching his shirtfront tightly in her little hand.

"I should put her to bed," Laura said, holding her arms out for her daughter.

Lorne smiled and cradled Cara against his chest. "I'll walk you. Come on." He got to his feet and hitched Cara against his shoulder so he could hold Laura's hand with his free one.

"You don't have to," Laura said with a smile.

"I want to," Lorne told her. "It gives me an excuse to spend some time with my favorite girls."

"Well," Laura teased, reaching up to press a kiss to his lips. "How can a girl argue with that!"

"Don't try, Lieutenant," Lorne murmured against her mouth. "It's against the regs to argue with a superior officer."

"Yes, sir," Laura sighed contentedly as he gently kissed the side of her neck and led her from the room. "Anything you say, sir."

**I really hope it was worth the wait. And do let me know if you have any ideas or suggestions for this or maybe a sequel?? It can't last forever you know! Anyone got any pearls of wisdom for me? Anyone? (",) **

**Eva x  
**


	21. At Last

**Hi guys, hope ye liked my last installment, I had a blast writing it. This story is getting to a really fun stage right now. And as usual a big thank you to Asugar for her beta. She is invaluable to me! **

**Rowena : Happy Birthday, my friend. and Congrats on Major Explosions. It's great! **

**Madge : Read my mind! It's in the very early stages as we speak!**

**Terri : With you all the way on the Sam/Jack thing. They're the ultimate couple really on the SG1 show. **

**WhatATragicComedy: What a great pen name! Thank you, I love to hear from readers. **

**Dollsnatch: A wedding on the way, I swear!**

**Iwrite4fun : I do keep ye waiting ages, don't i. Sorry! **

**Liesel : Yes. I am back! And woohoo to that! It's great to be back. I'd almost forgotten how to upload at this stage! **

**Lady-Knight : Thank you! Keep checking in to get those answers to your questions. **

**All feedback and suggestions are welcome. Also, if any of you have one shot requests to accompany this, I'd love to hear from you! **

**And now, ladies and gentlemen (Do I have gentlemen readers?)......the wedding!!**

**Chapter 21. At Last. **

"That's the last one finished," Laura called to Jennifer, who was anxiously surveying the mess hall. "Cara, have you got more of that ribbon I gave you?"

"Here, Mama," Cara answered, handing her mother a strand of the sapphire coloured ribbon she had been instructed to carry.

Laura tied a neat bow around the chair at the top of the room that set the bride and groom apart from the rest. She turned to check her handiwork and smiled with satisfaction.

The mess hall had been transformed for the wedding reception. A long table had been set apart from the rest of the room for the bridal party. The rest of the tables were shoved together in large clusters facing it. Several more were lined up against the wall to hold the food that was currently being cooked in the massive kitchen behind them.

White cloths covered the tables, with bold slashes of sapphire and green material in the centre of each. Bowls of the Pegasus version of wildflowers sat in the middle of them, their bright colors adding to the cheerful tones.

Carolyn and Sam were putting the finishing touches on the Gate Room, aided by Vala and Torrin. Teyla had taken Lily and they were both with John at the Athosian settlement, picking up guests in the jumper. Lorne and Teal'c were keeping Ronon distracted in the gym.

Laura smiled as she remembered Jennifer's warning to Ronon before she had been whisked away.

_Don't you dare get injured. Nobody's patching you up today._

"How does it look?" Jennifer wrung her hands together and looked worriedly at Laura.

"It looks like a storybook," Cara answered before Laura could say a word. "Is it time to get dressed?"

Laura looked at her watch and pursed her lips. "We could get started on your hair, Jen."

"Teyla will be back in a half hour," Jennifer reminded her. "We can get started then." She cast one last look around the room and smiled. "I'm getting married in a few hours." Her eyes sparkled with anticipation.

"Are you excited about wearing your wedding dress?" Cara asked, turning big blue eyes to Jennifer's face.

Jennifer smiled at Cara's innocent question. "I'm very excited, Cara. And I'm very glad you and your mom could be in the wedding."

"It's an honor," Cara said solemnly. "Uncle Cam says that one wedding makes another wedding. Maybe someone else will get married and I'll get to wear my princess dress again!"

"Hint hint?" Jennifer teased as she elbowed Laura in the ribs. "Maybe you'll be next." She could have bitten her tongue out as soon as she said the words. She gave Laura an apologetic look and was surprised to find Laura smiling at her.

"I don't think so," Laura answered mildly. "Maybe Daniel and Vala will take the plunge."

Jennifer searched her friend's hazel eyes for any sign of discontent and was glad to find none. "You're really moving on, aren't you?"

"It's time I did," Laura said, her smile holding no hint of the old sadness that had haunted them for so long. "I'll always miss Carson, but I think it's time to have a life again."

"I'm so glad to hear you say that," Jennifer said fervently. "I thought I'd never hear those words!"

Laura laughed. "Give me a chance to get used to it myself before you start planning my wedding!" She threaded her arm through Jennifer's and held out a hand to Cara. "Let's go see what the others are up to."

* * *

Lorne looked up as the doors of the gym slid back to reveal John and Torrin. "Colonel Sheppard, Torrin. You guys here to take him away?"

Tealc had left moments before, claiming that he needed to talk to Jack before the wedding. He had left Ronon with his best wishes and a regal bow, making Lorne smile at the formality.

"Is Jennifer dressed?" Ronon asked, putting down the weights he was lifting and looking at John.

"Ronon, don't you know by now that women are never on time?" John tossed him the bottle of water that was lying on the ground. "And then you have the obligatory twenty minutes."

"What twenty minutes?"

"The bride is always at least twenty minutes late for the wedding," John explained. He rolled his eyes. "Even Teyla was late."

"That's because you were late," Lorne reminded him. "You couldn't find your shoes."

"I had temporarily misplaced them," John frowned at him. "They were not lost."

"Of course not, sir." Lorne grinned. "Misplaced. Definitely."

"Shut up, Lorne."

"Yes,sir."

"Twenty minutes?" Ronon sounded disgusted. "Jennifer won't be twenty minutes late. She'll be on time. She's always on time."

"She's never on time," Lorne snorted. "You're just a worse timekeeper than she is!" He grinned. "Anyway, all that primping and the hair and makeup stuff takes forever."

"She doesn't need all that stuff," Ronon said gruffly. "She's perfect the way she is."

"She's going to look really pretty," Torrin declared, coming to sit beside Ronon on the bench. "Ronon, are you afraid of getting married?"

"No," Ronon answered, tousling Torrin's dark hair. "You shouldn't be afraid of getting married."

"I'm never getting married," Torrin announced. "It makes you do terrible things."

"Like what?" John demanded.

"Like kissing." Torrin said the word like it tasted sour. "Grown ups are always kissing."

"You'll like kissing girls too some day," Lorne predicted. "I'll remind you of this conversation then."

"I'm never kissing a girl," Torrin squealed. "It's gross!"

"It's not so bad," John said, biting back a grin. "Especially if she's as pretty as your mom."

"Or Jennifer," Ronon added.

"Laura's easy on the eyes," Lorne said thoughtfully. "Maybe you and Cara will get married someday," he teased, winking at Torrin.

" Uncle Rodney says that only fools get married. And Cara's a _girl_," Torrin shot back. "I'm never marrying a girl!" He folded his arms and thrust out his chin defiantly. "And that's that."

"He's as stubborn as his mother," John said to Lorne, who wisely nodded his agreement.

"I don't know," Ronon said slowly, tousling the boy's dark hair. "I'm getting married. Do you think I'm a fool?"

Torrin shook his head emphatically. "No! You're cool!"

"Thank you," Ronon answered gravely, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he attempted to hide his smile. "Now let's eat!"

* * *

"You can't be in here!" Vala shook her finger at Ronon, ignoring the deadly glare the Satedan sent in her direction. She stood in front of the closed mess hall doors, one hand on her hip, ready to do battle. "It's not allowed."

"Why not?" Daniel asked curiously. He and Cam had joined John, Lorne, Torrin and Ronon on their way to the mess to get some food, having spent the morning with wandering around the city and plaguing Rodney. "Is Jennifer in there?"

"No!" Vala glared at him, her blue eyes scornful. "It's tradition!"

"Vala, that tradition is not to let the groom see the bride," Cam said patiently, planting himself firmly in front of her and eyeballing her. "Now move aside."

"You don't scare me, Cameron Mitchell," Vala snorted. "You'll be in trouble if I tell Carolyn you tried to mess with tradition."

Defeated, Cam stepped back. "She's got me there."

"Chicken," Ronon snorted. He stepped forward and stopped when Vala snarled at him. "What is your problem?"

"I'm with the big man." Cam threw caution to the wind and stepped forward again. How much damage could one small wife do, he thought. And did they seriously expect to keep an entire city of people out of the main food source? He snorted at the thought of telling hungry marines that they couldn't come in. They wouldn't want to make the longer trip to the end of the north pier to the Daedalus, where breakfast had been served that morning.

"Carolyn!" Vala turned her head and hollered loudly towards the back of the mess. "Carolyn! Can you come here please?"

"What's wrong?" Carolyn sounded slightly out of breath as she hurried towards the door from a room down the hall. "Has something happened?" She stopped short when she spied the men at the door and narrowed her eyes at them. "You can't go in there."

"But we're hungry," John protested. "Lorne's been keeping Ronon occupied all morning, I've been flying the jumper with Teyla and Cam and Daniel here have been pestering Rodney since they got up!"

"Then go and eat in your quarters," Carolyn suggested briskly. She slapped a hand against Cam's chest as he advanced menacingly towards her and attempted to move her aside. "Cameron! Behave!"

"Now honey," Cam coaxed, giving her his best innocent look. "You can't expect us to starve, can you?" He leaned in and planted a kiss on her lips.

Carolyn kissed him back and slapped his chest again. "Forget it, flyboy. You and your band of merry men are not getting into that room."

"I don't know why you thought that would work," Daniel muttered at the deflated looking Cam.

"It usually does," Cam retorted, giving his wife an injured look. "She's turned traitor."

"It never works," Daniel argued.

"It does."

Daniel snorted and gave up.

Lorne decided to try his hand at gaining entrance to the room and applied some of the charm he had seen John use on occasion to get something he was refused. "Any chance of some coffee?" He gave Vala his most winning smile.

She smiled back. "Not a one."

"Please?" He widened his smile and looked pleadingly at her. "We're practically part of the wedding party. We won't touch a thing."

"You'll hardly know we're there," John added, adding his own charming grin to the mix and hoping that Vala would be swayed.

"You." Vala pointed at John. "You're very pretty. That hair and those eyes are quite yummy." She sighed at Daniel's raised eyebrow. "Oh Daniel, really! You know I love you the most."

"Thank you," Daniel answered wryly. "That's comforting."

"Anyway," Vala continued, ignoring Carolyn's soft laughter from behind her. "You are terribly charming, John. You too, Evan. You have a very nice pair of eyes."

"Thanks," Lorne winked at her. "So…coffee?"

Vala smiled and sidled closer to the men. "Read my lips. This is _very_ expensive lipstick so it should make them quite noticeable. No. N-O. No chance. Now go away." She folded her arms and glared at them.

"Damn." Lorne gave up. "Daniel, your girl here is tough."

"You better believe it." Daniel leaned in and kissed Vala firmly. "Explain yourself."

Vala sighed heavily and looked at Carolyn, who was rolling her eyes. "It's ready for the wedding."

"So?" Ronon was unimpressed. "I've seen the material. I helped Jennifer when she picked out the damn flowers. I know what it's supposed to look like. They were practicing the table settings in my living room!"

"It's clean and all set up," Carolyn added sternly. "You are not coming in and messing it up."

"Can I call you Aunt Vala?" Torrin interrupted suddenly, having watched the entire conversation with great interest. "I'd like you to be my Aunt Vala."

Vala smiled at the little boy, charmed instantly by the amber eyes and innocent face. "Of course you may. " She leaned down so she could look in his eyes. "I would be honoured."

Torrin smiled brightly at her. "Aunt Vala?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Can I have some juice? I'm really thirsty. Papa didn't give me anything to drink all day."

Vala gave John a disgusted look. "Shame on you." She took Torrin's hand, ignoring the men's jaws dropping all around her. "Come on, let's get you something to eat. You can sit at the table in the kitchen, how does that sound?" She turned and waved a hand over the door censor leading Torrin inside as the mess hall doors slid open..

Torrin threw them a triumphant look as he trotted after Vala. "Bye, Papa! See you later!"

Lorne began to laugh at their shocked faces. John followed suit and eventually the others gave up and laughed along with them.

"How'd he do that?" An incredulous Cam asked his wife, who was laughing as hard as any of the men. "What's he got that we don't?"

"He's polite," Carolyn managed to get out. "And he's really cute."

"I'm really cute," Cam shot back. "My momma tells me so all the time!"

"I wouldn't advertise that," Daniel said dryly. "It never pays to be a momma's boy."

"Come on," Ronon said, disgusted. "Let's go."

"I've got to say, Sheppard," Daniel continued, following the group down the hallway towards the transporters. "Your son is just like you."

"Cute?" Ronon asked with a wink for John.  
"No," Daniel answered, grinning. "Although you are very pretty, John"

"Thank you," John answered sarcastically.

"I was going to say sneaky," Daniel continued, his grin growing wider. "He tries to use his charm to get his way with the ladies."

"Hey!" John protested. "I'm married now. I don't need to charm anybody but my wife." He looked smug. "She can't resist me."

"Please!" Lorne snorted as they entered the transporter. He pressed the map that showed the living quarters and waited until the doors swished open again. "Teyla has you wrapped around her little finger and we all know it."

"That so, Lieutenant Colonel?" John eyed his XO threateningly. "Want to talk about a redhead and her five year old kid?"

"No, sir, not right now."

"Good." John stopped walking and let out a self satisfied laugh.

"What's funny now?" Ronon demanded. "And where is McKay? He's supposed to be here."  
"He went to check on Zelenka," Cam answered, looking at John. "Shep, why are you laughing?"

"I'm going to get to taste the cake," John said smugly when he stopped laughing.

"How?" Cam demanded indignantly. "No men in the mess hall. You heard Vala. And she's not backing down."

"I left my son with her," John retorted. "I've got to go back to get him. And when I do, they'll let me taste the cake!"

* * *

"Mama, the room is ringing!" Cara was standing on a chair in the middle of Teyla and John's living room, squirming impatiently as Laura buttoned up the back of her dress. "Mama, it's ringing!"

"I will get the door," Teyla told her, brushing past them. She opened the doors to reveal Carolyn, Sam and Vala. "Hello."

"Hi," Vala answered cheerfully, bustling into the room and stopping as she caught sight of Cara. "My my, Miss Beckett, don't you look a picture!"

"Mama says I look like a princess," Cara answered proudly. She held her arms out so that Vala could set her on the floor and scampered to the corner where her shoes were lying beside Laura's.

"You certainly do," Vala said, bending down to tie the straps of the little shoes securely on Cara's feet.

"Lily looks like a princess too," Cara declared, tugging Vala towards the table where Lily was happily lying in her bassinet and trying to grasp a plastic toy hanging over her head. "See?"

"She looks like an angel," Vala agreed, running a hand over Lily's soft cheek and smiling involuntarily when Lily gave her a dimpled grin.

"Is Jennifer ready?" Carolyn asked Teyla, who was fastening Laura's buttons.

"I'm ready." They all turned at the sound of Jennifer's voice to the doorway of Torrin's bedroom and fell silent. Jennifer came forward slowly, smiling shyly at them. "Do I look alright?"

"You look amazing," Carolyn said. "Ronon is going to be struck dumb."

"That'll be such a change," Laura teased. "Jen, you look fantastic."

Jennifer ran a hand down her hip, stroking the white material and smiled. "Marina outdid herself. It's perfect."

Laura stood back and admired the dress. The simple design suited Jennifer's petite form perfectly, moulding to her hips and then falling straight to the floor. The lace sleeves and bodice mirrored the style Jennifer's late mother had worn on her wedding day.

"Here." Teyla held out the long veil and helped Laura settle it over Jennifer's swept up hair. "Now you are ready."

"Do you have the rhyme ready?" Cara asked her, slipping her hand into Laura's. "Mama, she has to do the rhyme."

"What rhyme?" Vala asked, puzzled.

"Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue," Cara explained. "It's the law."

Laura nodded gravely. "She's right."

"Well, my veil is old." Jennifer touched the lace falling around her shoulders and smiled. "It belonged to my mother. I had it shipped out on the Daedalus with the material for the dress."

"Which is new," Carolyn continued. "The flowers you're carrying are blue and so is your engagement ring."

"Oops!" Jennifer quickly switched the ring from her left hand to her right. "There. Now we're good."

"But what about the borrowed?" Cara asked. She became upset when Jennifer shrugged. "You have to have the borrowed!"

"Honey, it's not really the law," Laura began, but Cara was already running to the door and jumping up and down to open it. She darted into the hallway and they could hear the sound of her footsteps running down the corridor. "Cara!"

"Back in a minute, Mama!" Cara's voice floated back to them and Laura laughed.

"What's she up to?" Sam wondered, picking Lily up and settling her into the crook of her arm. "You're sitting with me for the wedding, aren't you, sweetie?" Lily gurgled and waved her hands at her.

Laura was about to retrieve Cara when the sound of running footsteps was heard again from outside the door. Cara burst into the room and skidded to a halt in front of Jennifer. "Here." She held out a silver bracelet and smiled at Jennifer. "You can borrow this for your wedding. It's my bracelet that Evan brought me from M415….Mama, what was the end of it?"

"318," Laura finished, feeling a lump rise to her throat at Cara's generosity. She was so like her father, always doing whatever she could to help others. The thought made her smile.

"Thank you, Cara," Jennifer said softly, holding out her wrist so that Teyla could fasten on the bracelet. "Now I'm really ready."

"You look beautiful," Vala said, impulsively kissing her cheek. "Ronon is waiting for you and he looks good enough to eat!"

"Thank you," Jennifer said with a nervous smile at Vala. She whistled at Vala's midnight blue dress. "Wow! Daniel is going to swallow his tongue."

"I hope not," Vala grinned. "But thank you." She patted her upswept black hair and turned to Carolyn. "I'm glad you wore that one and not the red one."

Carolyn glanced down at her ice blue silk dress and raised one eyebrow questioningly. "Why?"

"Because you have legs," Vala told her, pointing to the limbs in question. "And the red one is too long and doesn't show them off."

"Not to interrupt," Laura said, seeing Carolyn open her mouth to retort, "but shouldn't you ladies be going to the gate room? It's almost time."

"Oh God, it's time," Jennifer parroted, wringing her hands together. "Laura, is my hair straight?"

"You wanted curls," Laura told her calmly. "I can straighten it again, but you'd be very late."

"You look wonderful," Teyla assured Jennifer. "Now, Sam, Lily is all yours. We will be along shortly." She kissed her daughter and smiled at Sam. "She should behave herself."

Sam snuggled Lily into the crook of her arm and turned to Jennifer. "Good luck!" She hugged Jennifer briefly and followed Vala and Carolyn to take their places in the Gate Room.

"Mama, can I radio Evan now?" Cara begged.

Laura pressed a hand against her stomach to sooth the butterflies that began to flutter at the mention of Evan's name. This would be the first thing that they appeared at together. Officially together. It was nerve wracking, even though it wouldn't be a surprise to most.

"Go ahead," she told Cara, handing her the com unit. She watched as Cara clicked it expertly. Laura took Jennifer's hand and squeezed tightly. "Let's go get you married, Doc."

* * *

"That's my cue," Lorne informed Ronon, John and Rodney, who were standing just in front of the Stargate. "They're ready."

"Oh lord," Rodney muttered, shooting his fourth glance in as many seconds at Louise Kerr, who was sitting several rows from him, dressed in a moss green coloured dress and wearing her hair loose around her shoulders. "It's time."

John gave him an incredulous look. "Why are you acting so nervous? It should be the big guy here wearing a hole in the floor and giving himself whiplash turning back to the stairs!"

"I have an integral role in this wedding," Rodney hissed quietly. "I am in the wedding party!" He cast another furtive glance backwards and blushed as Louise waved at him and winked.

"I'm the best man," John shot back. "You don't see me turning around every two seconds, do you? "

"I'm the groom," Ronon grumbled. "You'd think that I'd get some peace from you two today at least."

"Well I'm off to escort the ladies," Lorne said with a chuckle. "Ronon, good luck. " He shook the Satedan's hand and grinned. "If you feel the need to gag McKay, I'm happy to take his place."

"We would match then," John said thoughtfully, looking from his dress blues to Lorne's. "The pictures would look much better if you were here instead, Lorne."

"Agreed, sir," Lorne said, playing along. "Is that an order, then? Should I go and find something to gag him with?"

"It certainly is not an order!" Rodney exclaimed. He lowered his voice when Cam and Daniel snickered quietly. " This suit will look great in the pictures! It's Armani, I'll have you know!"

"Lorne." Ronon spoke very quietly. "Can you go and get Jennifer before I take you up on that offer?"

"Will do." Lorne held a hand out to Torrin, who was watching the conversation with great interest. "Come on, Torrin. Let's go get the girls."

"Bye, Rodney," Torrin said sweetly. "Try not to say anything silly!"

"That kid is going to be the death of me," Rodney muttered, turning to watch as Torrin trotted after Lorne's away from the assembled personnel.

"At least he knows when to keep his mouth shut," Cam muttered, earning himself a dig in the ribs from his wife. "What!"

"Try and behave today," Carolyn ordered with a sweet smile. "Or I'll punish you."

"Really?" Cam smiled suggestively at her. "How are you going to do that?"

"You are overdue a physical," was all Carolyn said in response. She smiled in satisfaction when her husband instantly quietened and merely resorted to sending Rodney the odd glare. "I thought that might sway you."

* * *

"Ladies?" Lorne activated the door sensor and stepped inside Teyla and John's quarters. "Your escort awaits you – Wow."

Jennifer and Teyla were standing ready, waiting for his arrival. He swept an admiring look over Jennifer's dress and whistled quietly. "Wow."

"You already said that," Teyla said with a knowing smile. "Do I get the same reaction?"

"You look pretty, Mama," Torrin replied with a wide smile. "Like a queen."

"Thank you," Teyla answered. "You look very handsome too."

"Evan!" Cara appeared from Torrin's bedroom and skipped towards him. "Look at me! I'm a princess!"

He took in her pretty blue dress and the white shoes, the blue flowers sitting in the long curls and leaned down so he could kiss her cheek. "You sure are a princess. May I have a dance later?"

Cara giggled and nodded. She turned to Torrin and frowned. "You're wearing a tie."

"So?" Torrin shrugged and stuck his chin out defensively. "You're wearing a dress."

Cara shrugged back at him. "You look okay. You need to hold my hand." She held out her small hand and eyed Torrin. "And you have to do it because it's the law."

Torrin heaved a dramatic sigh and took her hand in his. "Fine. I'm not dancing with you though."

"I didn't ask you to," Cara retorted before she caught Teyla's reproving look. "You can escort me to the gate room, Torrin. It's time to go now."

"It is indeed," Lorne agreed, trying desperately not to laugh at the two children. "Where's Laura?"

"Here," Laura answered, walking out of Torrin's room and halting just in front of him. She smiled at his slackjawed expression. "Hi."

He just stared at her. The slightly off the shoulder straps of her deep sapphire dress bared soft skin and toned arms. Her red-blonde hair was pulled from her face with blue flowers like the ones she carried in her arms and tumbled down her back in soft curls. The dress was nipped at the waist and fell to the floor similarly to Jennifer's.

Laura smiled again at him and leaned up to plant a kiss on his lips. "You look nice."

Lorne continued to stare and she began to blush. "Evan, stop it. You're making me self conscious. Don't you like it?"

"Wow." He repeated the word again. "Wow."

"You said that already," Jennifer reminded him, her voice teasing. "Now can we go?"

Lorne snapped to and hurried to her side as he nodded, but his eyes never left Laura. "I want a dance from each of you later," he told the three women emphatically.

Their laughter followed him as he escorted them from the room and down the hall to the transporter.

* * *

At the top of the gateroom stairs, Teyla nodded to Dr. Kui, the Chinese engineer handling the sound system. He pressed a button and music flooded through the speakers. She looked down across the room to see Ronon facing her, John and Rodney at his side.

Giving Torrin and Cara a little nudge, she smiled indulgently as they walked slowly down the stairs, Torrin holding tightly to Cara's hand. A sigh went up among the guests as the duo, who had been affectionately dubbed the Atlantis mascots, made their way to the front of the room.

"Your turn," Laura whispered. She watched as Teyla made her graceful way down the stairs and saw John's face as he caught sight of her coming towards him. His expression was a mixture of fierce pride and love. She supposed after suppressing them for so long, it was hard for him to hide his feelings for Teyla now that he was actually allowed to show them.

"You're up, Dynamite," Jennifer whispered. The doctor looked calm now that she was about to go down the stairs. Laura turned to give her a brief hug and felt Evan's hand tug at hers. She lifted expectant eyes to his.

"You look beautiful," He leaned forward and whispered the words in her ear. Evan pressed a kiss just under her jaw, careful not to smudge her face.

Laura beamed at him and began to descend the staircase. Once she took her place at Teyla's side, she winked at Ronon and faced back towards the stairs. She grinned at Cam and Carolyn. Time to sit back and enjoy the ride.

* * *

Sam watched as John nudged Ronon when it was time for him to turn around. Jennifer made her way towards him, her eyes never leaving his face. Lorne kissed her cheek and turned to take his assigned seat in the front row.

She was almost painfully aware of the man sitting beside her, his finger firmly in Lily's grasp as she held the infant on her lap. Not for the first or even the hundreth time did she wonder how her life might have turned out if she had married him and settled down. She could have her own child by now. Jack's child.

_He didn't want to marry you_. The voice in her head reminded her of that cold, hard painful fact. _He never really wanted you. Never really wanted to be with you. _

When Jack cleared his throat softly, she risked a peek at him only to realise he was looking back at her, his dark eyes watching her intently. She had to order herself to look away. She rocked Lily gently and focused all her attention on the words Steven Caldwell was saying.

The rest of the ceremony passed by in a blur. She watched Jennifer slide the heavy silver ring onto Ronon's finger and laughed along with the rest of the guests as Ronon fumbled with Jennifer's much smaller ring.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife," Caldwell said formally. "Ronon, I don't think I need to tell you what comes next, do I?"

The Satedan's face broke out in a wide grin and he shook his head. He gripped Jennifer's waist firmly and kissed her with such enthusiasm that the guests began to hoot and clap.

Torrin and Cara were giggling at the display. Lily waved fat little hands and reached towards her father, who was grinning at her.

"Lovely wedding," Jack commented quietly as Ronon and Jennifer made their way down the aisle back to the base of the stairs, accepting congratulations and good wishes from the rest of the expedition as they did.

"It was, sir," Sam agreed, hitching Lily up against her shoulder and nodding to Teyla as she and John followed the bride and groom.

"Carter, I – "

"Sam!" Vala was tugging her arm to get her attention. "Come over here."

"Excuse me, sir." Sam nodded at Jack and followed Vala to where Daniel and Carolyn were standing, waiting to congratulate Ronon and Jennifer.

"What is it?" She looked at Vala's innocent face. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Vala said airily. "I just thought you might need rescuing."

"Rescuing?" Sam kept her voice calm, aware of the baby in her arms. "Why would you think that?"

"Oh let's see, shall we?" Vala said. "One, you looked like you wanted to run away." She ticked off her list on her fingers as she spoke. "Two, you didn't exactly look like the picture of happiness sitting next to General O'Neill, considering we're at a wedding. And three, need I remind you of the last time you two were at the same wedding?"

Sam went very pale. "No, you don't. Excuse me." She hurried from the room with Lily in her arms, brushing past Jack who had been on his way towards them as she did.

"That was a little harsh," Daniel said quietly to Vala, who then looked stricken. "I know you meant well, sweetheart, but you can't just go interfering like that."

"I hadn't finished," Vala said, her lip trembling a little. Daniel almost never reproached her and she hated that he was disappointed in her. "I've got a plan."

"What is it?" Carolyn asked quietly, watching as Jack finished making his way towards them. "It better be good," she added under her breath.

"Just wait," Vala almost sang out. She flashed Jack her most brilliant smile. "Hello, General."

"What did you say to Sam to make her leave like that?" Jack demanded. "I wanted to talk to her."

"I don't know what you mean," Vala answered airily.

"Don't play innocent, Miss MalDoran," Jack warned. "What did you say to her?"

The uncharacteristically harsh tone to his voice made Daniel step forward. "Wait a second, Jack."

"I'm tired of waiting," Jack burst out, shocking them all. He scrubbed his hands over his eyes. "Sorry, Daniel. I'm just a little…preoccupied."

"This whole mess is your fault anyway," Carolyn muttered.

"Pardon me?" Jack blinked at her.

Vala poked him in the chest. "What do you want to talk to Sam for anyway? To hurt her again?"

"What's going on?" Cam asked as he arrived in the group and putt one arm around Carolyn to draw her to his side. "Vala, why are you poking at General O'Neill?"

"Because he's being an ass," Carolyn said bluntly. "To put it mildly."

Cam's jaw dropped at his wife's uncharacteristic rudeness. "Carolyn, sweetie, let's not insult my boss." He smiled nervously at Jack. "She doesn't mean it, sir."

"Oh yes, she does," Carolyn insisted. She stepped forward and away from Cam so that she was now standing shoulder to shoulder with Vala as she squared off against Jack

"Ladies, if we could calm down," Daniel advised, putting a restraining hand on Vala's shoulder. "Let's not get ourselves in a snit at Ronon and Jennifer's wedding."

"Did you just say snit?" Cam asked.

The women took no notice of either of them. Vala glared at Jack. "Go and say you're sorry."

"For what?" Jack asked, but he looked guilty. "What did I do? You were the one that sent her out of the room."

"It's not me or the damn room that's caused all the trouble," Vala exclaimed in frustration. She watched Jack's face go as pale as Sam's had. "Go. And. Say. You. Are. Sorry." She enunciated each word with a hard poke to Jack's chest.

"Sam is our friend," Carolyn added. "She doesn't have that many female friends and when we saw how upset she was before she came here, we cornered her."

"A little help here?" Jack looked at Daniel. "Daniel?"

"I have to agree," Daniel said slowly. "I'm sorry, Jack. But Vala's right. Sam has been devastated at how you've treated her."

Jack sighed. " She's the one who doesn't want me. I tried. I tried to get her to change her mind."

"She's hurt, you moron!" Vala hissed at him. "Go and tell her what she needs to hear."

"What's that?" Jack looked blankly at her. "I already told her I'm retiring."

"You said those exact words?" Carolyn asked. "What else?"

"I asked her if she had feelings for me," Jack said. He looked at Cam. "Mitchell?"

"Sir, permission to speak freely?"

"Go ahead," Jack answered with a sigh. "You might as well. Everyone else here has."

"Did you tell her how you feel about her?"

"For God's sake, Mitchell. We're not on the love boat! You don't just go around telling people stuff like that!"

"No, sir, we're not. But maybe she needs to hear it." Cam squared his shoulders and met the general's gaze head on, silently praying that he wasn't about to be slapped down a few ranks.

"For once, I agree with Cameron," Vala said coolly, breaking the silence hanging over the group. "He doesn't usually make sense, but he's right."

"Okay, okay!" Jack snapped. "Fine. I'll go and talk to her."

"A wise idea, O'Neill," Tea'c said calmly. He seemed to appear out of nowhere. "She is very distraught. I believe it would be wise to speak with her before this wedding too becomes the stage of a scene between you two."

Jack's jaw dropped at this seeming betrayal. "Is everyone in on this little ambush?"

"It's not an ambush, Jack," Daniel said quietly. "We just want you both to be happy."

"And we can all see that you'll be happier together than you would be if you were apart." Vala had had enough. "Now go. You can thank us later."

When Jack was gone, she turned to Carolyn. "I want that dress back for their wedding."

* * *

Sam sat in her office, looking down on the rest of the people making their way to the mess hall. Lily was lying quietly in her arms, watching her with wide hazel eyes.

"Hi," she murmured softly. "It must be great to be a baby. No worries, nothing to think about but your next feed."

She shifted Lily slightly in her arms and smiled down at her. "Must be great to be the center of someone's world, huh? Because you are. Your daddy would do anything for you. So would your mom, for that matter. And Torrin, too. "

She sighed. "I hope nobody ever hurts you, Lily."

Lily reached up to touch her face and babbled in her baby voice. Sam smiled again. "Yeah. I thought so. Men are all dumb. And the first one to break your heart will get his ass drop kicked off the south pier." She nuzzled the baby's soft cheek. " And that's if he's lucky! But someday, somebody will love you more than anyone else and then you'll be complete. I really hope you don't end up like your Aunt Sam."

"What way is that?" Jack asked quietly. He had been listening silently from the doorway, his heart aching as he heard her talk to the baby.

Sam didn't look up at him. She focused on Lily's little face instead, not wanting him to see her tears. "Alone."

"You're not alone," Jack argued, coming to sit beside her in the chair closest to hers. He was aware of the fact that she stiffened slightly and moved away from him. "Dammit, Carter, don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Pull away from me." Jack gripped her hand tightly in his. "Don't," he repeated as she tried to remove her hand from his.

"Let go, sir," she said, her voice unsteady. Her heart was beating so fast she was surprised it didn't burst from her chest. "Please. I can't do this anymore."

"Do what?" Jack didn't let go. HE mentally activated the door lock and tightened his grasp. She was trapped now and he wasn't letting her go until they talked. "You've avoided me since I got here."

"I've been busy," Sam answered. "Sir, I need to take her back to Teyla."

"Teyla is fine. She knows where Lily is. Carter – Sam – we need to talk about this."

"You made it clear last time that there is nothing to talk about, sir," Sam told him. "And I don't think I need to remind you of Cam's wedding."

"No, that was you," Jack snapped. "You said what you had to say. Now it's my turn. Don't make me order you to listen because so help me, Sam, I will. You've been avoiding me for days."

"Fine." Sam gave up. "Go ahead."

Jack took a deep breath and prepared to say what he knew would be the most important words he would ever say. Mitchell was right, damn him. It was time to tell her, or he would lose her. And his world without her was unthinkable.

"I love you."

**Well? Did you like it? Please review. Don't lurk, it makes me very nervous! **


	22. Meant To Be This Way

**I am back!! And yes, I realise that it's been waaaayyy too long since I posted. I am sorry. I only hope I haven't lost many of you along the way. My beta (the brilliant Asugar) has been swamped, as have I. Then my laptop decided to go to it's eternal reward and unlike Lazarus, there was no miracle there! However, thanks to my beloved, I got a new one complete with internet access (limited to weekends when I'm at home, but I've got it!). **

**Apologies to everyone and thanks to you all for your patience. There is one more chapter in this story, then who knows! We shall see!!**

**Enjoy, I promise not to take so long with the next one! **

**Eva.**

**Chapter 22. Meant to be this way. **

Lily's soft gurgle made Sam jerk out of her stupor and blink at Jack. She opened her mouth to speak but found herself unable to do so.

"I love you." Jack repeated the words almost desperately "Sam, I – "

"I heard you." Sam's voice was raspy with a mixture of tension and disbelief. "I heard you the first time."

"And?" Jack was beginning to fidget now, something which would have made her smile with recognition under any other circumstances. Now coupled with what he was saying it made her stomach do a crazy dance and her heart beat wildly in her chest. She could feel Lily fussing in her arms, waving little legs and hands around in a vain attempt to gain attention.

"Why?" Sam asked, sitting down and rocking Lily slightly to calm her.

"What?" Jack dropped into the chair across from her and looked confusedly at her.

"Why?" Sam repeated insistently. "Why now?"

"If I told you that Mitchell, Dr Mitchell, Jackson and MalDoran mixed with a bit of Teal'c made me do it, would you believe me?"

Sam gave him a level stare. "Why now?" Her voice was flat.

"I thought that this was what you wanted," Jack said, wondering why the hell she wasn't more positive about this admission. He was starting to feel a little worried and very confused  
Jack decided to do something he hadn't done in years and just tell her how he felt. He took a very deep breath. Jack finally said. "Because if I don't tell you now, I won't get another chance."

Sam raised an eyebrow and waited. Her chest felt tight, and she had to force herself to breathe normally.

Jack ran his hands through his hair and looked at her. "Sam, I screwed up. I screwed up big time."

If he hadn't looked straight at her, straight into her as he said that, she would have jumped up and left the room. His dark eyes held hers captive, burning with sincerity. She couldn't doubt him.

She didn't want to doubt him.

"You can say something now," Jack prompted. He sounded nervous. "Please?"

Sam looked down at Lily as she watched the adults calmly. In response to the agitation in the air, the baby gave them a big smile and cooed.

Jack smiled helplessly back at Lily. "She's a pretty little thing, isn't she?"

Sam nodded sadly, unable to resist kissing Lily's soft cheek. "She's perfect. Makes me wish…" She didn't finish her sentence.

"Makes you wish?" Jack prompted, though he knew exactly where this was going.

"Nothing. It doesn't matter anymore." Sam shook her head, concentrating on Lily's face.

"Sam, listen to me." Jack took her hand in his, forcing her to look at him. "I'm not asking you to forgive the last few years. I'm not asking you for a promise. I just want you to give us a try." He held his breath, hoping.

Sam exhaled slowly. "What if I want a promise?" She looked up at him defiantly.

Jack looked bewildered. "Excuse me?"

"I'm not getting any younger, sir. What if I want that promise and the chance to have a family?" Sam looked at their joined hands and wondered how he would answer that one.

"Well." Jack blew out a breath and tightened his hand around hers. "Then those are things we'd have to talk about."

Sam narrowed her eyes and considered this. "How likely are you to agree to have children?"

"When did you get so demanding?" Jack asked crossly. "I just laid it all out there for you and you-"

"Love you." Sam said quietly, cutting him off midstream.

Jack did a double take. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I said I love you too," Sam said. "But you already knew that, didn't you, sir?"

"I had a suspicion," Jack admitted sheepishly. "Scared the hell out of me, Carter."

"How so?" she asked, shifting Lily to cradle her against her shoulder.

"I thought that you'd given up on me," Jack was twisting his hands together. "I thought I'd left it too late."

"You did," Sam replied. "I tried. God knows I tried to forget you. But somehow I couldn't."

"I'm sorry I hurt you," Jack said. "I never wanted to."

"I know."

"I just didn't know what else to do." Jack shook his head. "No, that's not exactly true. I was just afraid and it was easier not to."

"I know," Sam said, squeezing his hand lightly.

"And we could have lost our jobs, both of us."

"I know." Sam was starting to enjoy this new honesty. She waited for him to continue.

"So I tried to forget it, to bury how I felt." Now that Jack had finally opened up, he found himself unable to stop talking, afraid that she might run from him again if he didn't tell her everything.

"I know, sir," Sam repeated. She was almost unable to believe that she was finally hearing the words she had waited for so long.

"It's not going to be easy for a while," Jack warned. "I have to officially retire, and then get new security clearances and maybe talk to President Hayes about other stuff."

Sam pressed her lips to his, shutting him up. When she pulled back from the kiss he looked slightly dazed. "You should do that again," he said, smiling crookedly.

"Is that an order, sir?" Sam grinned saucily back.

"Do you need it to be?" He arched one eyebrow, challenging her.

She kissed him again, pouring years of frustration and longing into it. He gripped her shoulders tightly and kissed her back.

As the kissed, Jack wondered why the hell he hadn't done this long ago.

A squawk of protest from Lily at being squashed between their bodies finally broke them apart. As they reluctantly broke apart, giggles floated into the room. Sam looked over to the doorway where Cara and Torrin stood. He children's eyes were bright with excitement at catching the adults.

"Oh crap," Jack muttered. "I forgot the kids."

"What?" Sam turned back to glare at him. "You planned to use the kids to get me to listen to you? "

"No," Jack protested with an injured look. "I forgot they follow people and get information to feed to Sheppard."

"Are you two going to get married like Jennifer?" Cara inquired, coming into the room to lean against Jack's knee. She tipped her head up to look at him. "I think Sam would look beautiful in a white dress."

Jack had to blink to clear away a sudden image of Sam walking towards him in a white dress with flowers in her hair. He smiled at Cara. "Do you think so?"

"I think that weddings are fun," Cara told him. "There's cake. And a party. Mama is dancing with Evan and he's holding her really close, like Teyla and John do. "

"They're looking at each other funny," Torrin said, rolling his eyes. "Why do grown ups always want to look all silly and kiss? It's disgusting." He snorted in disgust. "And now you two are doing it too"

Sam began to laugh. "Someday you'll be all for it, Torrin."

"Are you getting married?" Cara persisted with the topic she'd introduced. She wriggled until Jack put an arm around her and picked her up. Satisfied, she leaned against his chest. "Can I be in the wedding? I've already got a dress, but if you want to get me a new one…"

"You're a clever little girl," Sam laughed again at Cara's impertinence. She started to stand up but Jack tugged her back down into the chair. She looked at Jack inquiringly. "Sir?"

"Kid's got a point," Jack said slowly, He looked at Cara. "Do you think I should marry her?"

"I do," Cara declared, nodding vigorously. "You've been looking at her all the time since you got here. And I think you love her."

"Why do you think that?" Jack asked.

"Because you kissed her the way Uncle Cam kisses Aunt Carolyn," Cara said, wrinkling her forehead as she thought about his question. "Do you want to kiss anyone else?"

"No," Jack held Sam's gaze as he spoke. "I don't want anybody else."

"What about babies?" Torrin demanded. "Are you going to make a baby?"

Sam opened her mouth to respond but Jack beat her to it." Maybe."

Sam tried to speak again. "Sir, I-"

"Do you love him, Sam?" Torrin fixed his innocent brown eyes on her. "Mama says that sometimes when you love somebody you can't always show it."

Cara interrupted. "I think if you love him you should tell him." She looked at Sam with a mischievous sparkle in her eyes.

"She won't tell him if we're listening!" Torrin hissed. "That's grown up stuff. They never say it when we're listening!"

"I told you we should have kept quiet," Cara replied, glaring. "Then we'd have found out if they're getting married."

"Okay, kids," Sam cut in before they started arguing. "No fighting. And Cara, no, we're not getting married."

"Why not?" Jack demanded. "That's not what you said a few minutes ago."

"It's not that easy," Sam said, in a bit of a panic. "You're still my superior officer. And I don't want to give up my command here."

Jack looked angry and confused. "Why not? You just told me you love me. And who says you'd have to give that up?"

"I do love you," Sam immediately replied. "But that doesn't mean that we – "

"But I thought that when people fall in love, they get married," Cara said, deeply disappointed. "That's what Mama always says."

"My mama says that, too," Torrin said. He then pointed at Lily. "Don't you want a baby?"

"Torrin." Sam prayed for the inspiration to explain fraternization rules and other concepts over his head. "This is a conversation for adults. You're too young to be taking part in it."

"No, we're not. We're extremely bright," Cara said pleadingly. "Uncle Rodney says so."

"Even though we're really annoying," Torrin interrupted. "And we eat all his food."

"Why don't you two go back to the party?" Jack suggested. "Torrin, tell your mom that we've got Lily and she'll be returned shortly."

Torrin nodded and leaned in to Sam's lap to kiss his sister on the cheek. He cautioned. "Sam, you have to make sure you hold her head up so she can see things."

Cara nodded. "It's extremely important for a child's early development to learn to notice their immediate surroundings." She smiled angelically at Jack when his jaw dropped. "Uncle Rodney says so."

Torrin grabbed her hand and tugged her towards the door. "Come on, Cara. We have to go and tell Papa what happened."  
The sound of their footsteps scampering across the walkway office and their excited chattering echoed back into the office.

Sam rose to her feet. "I should return Lily to Teyla."

"Not so fast," Jack ordered, staying her with a hand on her wrist. "What's going on in that head, Carter?"

Sam sighed. "I don't know."

"You gotta give me something here," Jack said, feeling a little uneasy at her doubtful expression. That couldn't be a good sign.

"I don't know," Sam repeated her earlier response. "How can I know? First you tell me that you're retiring and then you say that it's bad timing for us to be together and you break my heart again. And then you leave."

"I left because you told me to go," Jack reminded her evenly. "But continue."

"Then you come back and you tell me you love me." Sam looked accusingly at him. "Do you have any idea how long I've waited to hear that? Do you? How do I know you won't change your mind again and leave me?"

Jack shot to his feet at that. He grabbed her around the waist, kissing her fiercely. "I'm not going anywhere." He smiled ruefully and corrected himself. "Well, maybe to Earth for a while until I get things in place."

"But you're coming back, right" Sam asked tentatively. She was afraid to believe what was happening. She couldn't stop wondering if she was dreaming and would soon wake up.

Jack couldn't smile at the absurdity of not coming back to Sam Carter when she seemed so genuinely afraid. He lowered his forehead to hers and spoke solemnly. "Yes, Carter. Of course I'm coming back." He kissed her gently, feeling giddy with excitement. She loved him! Only the baby in her arms stopped him from grabbing her and swinging her around.

Sam gifted him with a radiant smile. "That's good news, sir."

Jack groaned theatrically. "Carter?"

"Yes, sir?"  
"Do you think you can stop calling me sir at some stage before we get married? I feel like I'm your lord and master or something."

"Yes, sir," Sam answered, her smile growing wider. "Of course, sir."

"You're pushing it," Jack growled. He kissed her firmly. "Now, go and take that baby back to her mother. Let's get back to the wedding. We have a lot to celebrate!"

Sam's smile turned wicked as she saluted crisply with her free hand. "Yes, sir!"

* * *

John stood up and cleared his throat nervously. He kept Teyla's encouraging smile in the corner of his eye. He tapped a spoon against his glass to quiet the room.

"Speech time," Rodney sang out with an evil grin. "Don't forget your lines, Sheppard! Think of how bad it would look." He grunted as Louise elbowed him hard in the ribs.

"Quiet," she said with a theatrically menacing glare.

"Thank you, Major," John said, giving Rodney a look that made it clear that he would pay for that later. He sighed and awkwardly smoothed over his dark ruffled hair. "I'm not a fan of speeches," he began.

"That's because you're no good at them," Rodney interjected, sotto voice. He shut his mouth promptly at a single look from Ronon.

"But," John continued with a threatening look at the now silent scientist. "I'll make an exception on this occasion because I want to say how important Ronon and Jennifer are to the people in this city."

Teyla turned in her seat so that she faced him front on and folded her hands together. She smiled brightly up at him and he smiled back at her, almost forgetting for a moment why he was speaking.

"You were saying?" Rodney smirked at him as he prompted John to continue.

"Sorry." John dragged his gaze away from Teyla and mentally shook himself. "On behalf of everyone here, I'd like to wish Ronon and Jennifer happiness in their life together." He smiled at the couple.

Ronon sat beside his wife, one arm firmly around her shoulders. As everyone clinked their glasses with their silverware, he obediently pressed a kiss to her hair, sparking applause and cheers from the guests. Jennifer beamed radiantly.

"So," John continued. "I propose a toast to Mr and Dr Dex." He raised his glass. "To Ronon and Jennifer."

"To Ronon and Jennifer." Everyone in the room repeated as they toasted.

"I'd like to thank you all," Jennifer said when the noise died down. "It means a lot to both Ronon and I to have you all here." Her voice wavered slightly as she smiled at them. "Thank you."

"Can we have cake now?" Rodney interjected, feeling that the emotional speeches had gone on long enough.

Ronon nodded. "Good idea." He took his wife's hand in his and led her to the large and colourful cake resting on a table in the corner.

The sound of running footsteps echoed outside the room. Teyla looked around for the children as she recognised the sound of running footsteps approaching.

"Mama!" Torrin shouted, running towards her and waving his arms with excitement. "Mama, guess what!"

Cara was running towards Laura, who was standing beside Lorne just in front of Teyla. She also shouted to get her mother's attention. "Mama, you won't believe it!"

"What happened?" Teyla and Laura asked in unison. Both women stooped down to listen to their children.

Many in the room went silent, curious to hear what Torrin and Cara had to say.

"Jack and Sam are getting married!" The children blurted their revelation in perfect harmony.

Laura's couldn't hide her surprise. A look around her told her that she wasn't the only one. Cam looked at Cara as if she had grown another head. Daniel's head was bouncing between Torrin to Cara and back again like a character in a cartoon.

"They really are, Evan," Cara declared. "We heard him ask her and everything!"  
"And she said she wasn't sure," Torrin went on breathlessly, "but I think she'll say yes." He looked at his audience to see their reaction. "Uncle Rodney, are you alright? Your mouth is open really wide."

Jack chose that moment to stroll casually into the room, Sam and Lily at his side. He looked concerned at the shocked expressions of everyone around him. "What? What did we miss?"

* * *

"You're really getting married." Vala asked, examining Sam's flushed face with a critical look. "Sam, darling, are you sure you haven't gone mad?"

"I don't know," Sam laughed nervously at herself. She looked at Teyla, Carolyn and Vala, who had cornered her at the first available opportunity. "Have I?"

"How did it happen?" Carolyn demanded, her brown eyes flitting from Sam to where Jack was being congratulated by Daniel and Teal'c.

"I don't know," Sam repeated, frowning. "He cornered me in my office and said he loves me. And then he said that we should get married and have a baby." She pressed a hand to her stomach, feeling overwhelmed by the events of the last while. "Sam, this is great news," Carolyn said with an encouraging smile. Her smile faded slightly at the panic on Sam's face. "Isn't it?"

"Sam." Teyla cradled Lily in one arm and took Sam's hand in her firm and comforting grip. "Are you feeling all right?"

"I don't know," Sam said again. Her tone was desperate this time. "How will it work? I live in another galaxy. And there's the whole part about fraternization rules. How can we get married, never mind have a baby?" She stopped dead. "What if he didn't mean it?"

"Oh for God's sake," Vala said firmly. "Get a hold of yourself, Samantha. How many crazy reality altering things have you experienced? Do you really think this is another one of them?"

"No," Sam answered. "But-"

"Sam," Teyla took control of the conversation. "You are not dreaming. General O'Neill has proposed to you. You told us this yourself."

"Better than that, Cara and Torrin announced it to the entire expedition!" Carolyn said with a satisfied smile. "Try killing those rumors now!"

"Exactly," Vala said gleefully. "There is absolutely no way he's backing out of it."

"What do I do?" Sam asked.

Carolyn rolled her eyes. "Let's be realistic here. You've been in love with General O'Neill for what, fifty years now? Ah!" She held up a hand to hold off Sam's protestations. "You know what I mean. You love him, Sam. And by the sound of it, he finally admitted that he loves you too."

Vala chimed in. "According to your account of things, he said it more than once. So this is what you do." She paused for dramatic effect and looked at Carolyn.

"Marry him!" Carolyn and Vala ordered in unison.

Sam smiled hesitantly. "You think so?"

"Absolutely," Teyla answered. "It is time you put your needs before that of the Air Force."

Laura and Jennifer came hurrying towards them, wearing identical expressions of intrigue and delight. As soon as the doctor reached them, she gave a squeal and threw her arms around Sam. "You're getting married!?"

"She certainly is," Vala said, cutting Sam' off before she could reply. "We just have to make sure she doesn't back out!"

"Why would she do that?" Laura asked, brushing her hair back from her face. She wasn't used to the loose style, preferring the regulation bun for everyday work.

"Because she's scared. Isn't that so, Sam?" Vala taunted

"Oh, now you're asking me to speak?" Sam retorted. "I'm not afraid." She sighed at Vala's knowing look. "Okay, okay. Maybe a little scared. I'm just being cautious."

"Screw cautious," Jennifer advised. "You've been waiting for this for thirteen years. I say grab it with both hands." She beamed at Sam as only a bride can. "It's worth it when he puts that ring on your finger."

Sam studied the narrow white gold band that now accompanied Jennifer's engagement ring and felt an old longing she thought long dead stir inside her. I smile bloomed on her face as she watched Jack chat with the male members of SG1. "Maybe you're right."

* * *

"You didn't order her to marry you, did you?" Daniel looked worriedly at his old friend. "Because that would not go down well."

Jack shook his head with amusement at Daniel's fussing. "No, Daniel, of course I didn't order her to marry me." He grinned. "I thought about it, but I realized that it wouldn't be the wisest course of action."

"Good call," Daniel answered, relieved. "So. You finally admitted the obvious?"

"You betcha," Jack said cheerfully. "And hang the consequences."

"Ah." Daniel gave a dramatic sigh of relief and winked at Teal'c. The Jaffa's lips twitched, which Jack had learned to be his equivalent of uncontrolled laughter. "Teal'c, he said _hang the consequences_."

"So I heard, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c replied smoothly. "I am inclined to agree with General O'Neill. It has taken him far too long to be truthful to himself in regard to his feelings for Colonel Carter."

Daniel nodded his agreement. "But then again, he's always been…"

"Stubborn." Teal'c offered, looking at Jack.

"I was going to say dense," Daniel mused. "But stubborn works as well."

"General O'Neill!" Cam enthusiastically boomed out from behind them, a broad grin on his face. "Congratulations, sir."

Smiling equally broadly, Jack shook Cam's hand. "Thanks, Mitchell. But she hasn't said yes yet."

"I thought the kids said that she had." Cam looked puzzled. "She didn't say yes?"

"Not in so many words," Jack answered. "But she will." He smiled smugly. "And if all else fails, she won't disobey a direct order."

Daniel groaned and rolled his eyes. "I thought you were finally getting it," he sighed. "Oh well. It'll be fun to watch you try that one."

"Indeed," Teal'c agreed, his dark eyes twinkling with amusement. "I think a more persuasive approach might be a wiser course of action, O'Neill."

"Really?" Jack asked sarcastically. "Ya think?"

"Sir, I think you should start with the old standards," Cam said. "Flowers, chocolate, a few "you're beautifuls" and some "you make me happier than I've ever been"."

"They work for you?" Jack asked, looking over to Carolyn and back to Cam.

"My girl isn't into the fancy compliments," Cam replied, his eyes warm as he looked at his wife. "She's all about action."

"More than I needed to know," Daniel said in mock disgust. "Keep it to yourself, Mitchell!"

Teal'c folded his hand together and inclined his head. "I believe that if you tell her that what you said in her office was from your heart, she will believe you. I wish you luck, O'Neill."

"Thanks," Jack said. He cocked an ear towards the speakers in the corner. The tempo of the music had slowed. Couples were beginning to pair off and sway to the music blaring from the speakers.

"I'm fixing to go ask my girl to dance," Cam declared, heading to where Carolyn was tapping her foot on the floor in time to the music.

"Good idea," Daniel agreed, elbowing Jack as he left him. "Go and ask Sam to dance. Don't make her cry this time!"

* * *

"Hi." Teyla turned towards her husband. He held out his hand. "Can I dance with my favorite girls?"

Teyla smiled lovingly at him and nodded. He took Lily from her and cradled her securely against one shoulder. John led his wife to the edge of the dance floor. "I like this song,"

He slipped his free arm around Teyla, drawing her close. She rested her head on his shoulder and swayed with him, one arm around him and the other on Lily's back. John pressed his lips to her hair and thought about how lucky he was.

There was nowhere he'd rather be right now than enjoying this moment with his family.

* * *

"Miss Beckett." Lorne bowed low to Cara. "May I have this dance?"

Cara curtsied gracefully in response. Lorne smiled and winked at Laura.

"I learned that on the tv," Cara confided as he swung her into his arms and spun her around. She laughed "Do that again!"

Lorne swung her up again and settled her so that she was sitting comfortably on his hip. "You look beautiful, princess."

"Thank you," Cara answered politely. "Doesn't Mama look beautiful too?" She pointed to where Laura was chatting amiably with Marina. "And Marina too?"

"They sure do," Lorne answered. "Extremely pretty."

"I think so too," Cara said happily. "Wouldn't Mama look pretty in Jennifer's wedding dress?"

Lorne smiled, picturing Laura just so. "Yes she would. You're going to look beautiful someday in your own wedding dress too."

"That's forever from now. Besides, Mama says I'm growing up entirely too fast and that she wants time to stand still." Cara snuggled against him contentedly and closed her eyes. "I think I'd like to wear a wedding dress."

"You will when you're old enough," Lorne replied, inwardly vowing that no boy was going to get within an inch of his precious Cara without getting his approval first. And he was looking forward to using some classic scare tactics. Ronon and John would help him. Cam too, if he were in the same galaxy.

A tugging on his pant leg made him look down at Torrin.

"Hey, buddy," Lorne said with a smile.

Cara peered down at Torrin. She raised her eyebrows at him in a gesture so like Laura's that it made Lorne bite back a smile. "I'm dancing with Evan now," she told him primly.

"You're supposed to dance with me," Torrin informed her. "It's the law."

"You're the one who said you didn't want to dance with me," Cara shot back, wriggling to get down until Lorne set her back on her feet. She squared off with Torrin. "You broke the law first."

Lorne looked questioningly at Laura, who was standing nearby. She merely shrugged with a smile. He turned his attention back to Cara, who was pulling at his hands. "What is it, sweetheart?"

"We were dancing," she told him firmly. "Hold my hands, please."

Lorne obediently took her hands in his, allowing her to put her little feet on the toes of his boot so he could twirl her around again. He watched as an endearingly crestfallen Torrin made his way over to Laura. She bent down and whispered something in his ear, making his eyes light up.

Moments later, Torrin was back tugging on his pant leg again. "Evan, I'm cutting in." He sounded triumphant. "Cara, you have to dance with me if I cut in. It's the law."

"Is that true, Evan?" Cara demanded suspiciously.

"That's the rule," Lorne said slowly, He desperately restrained the urge to laugh, knowing that Torrin would be upset if he did. "You're going to have to dance with him, princess."

Cara gave a dramatic sigh. "Thank you, Evan. You can go and dance with Mama now." She turned to Torrin and curtsied gracefully. "Torrin! You're supposed to bow just like _The Princess Diaries_!"

Torrin rolled his eyes, but obeyed. He took Cara's hands and began to twirl her around the floor, making the other dancers smile indulgently at them.

Lorne looked around when he felt a tap to his shoulder. Laura stood behind him, her hazel eyes twinkling with amusement. "May I have this dance, sir?"

Lorne gave her a mock frown. "You're supposed to curtsy like in _The Princess Diaries_,"

Laura snorted with laughter. "Oh she didn't!"

"She did," Lorne confirmed. "She wouldn't dance with him until he did."

"That's my girl," Laura said proudly. "Never settle for anything less than the proper treatment." She gave him a stern glare. "So? Bow!"

Lorne burst into laughter and swept into a bow. She immediately curtsied playfully and moved into his arms.

The music switched seamlessly to a new song and Laura rested her head against Lorne's shoulder. He cradled her hand against his chest and held her close. "They look so sweet together," she murmured.

"Who? The kids?"

"Yeah," she answered softly. "They're going to be a match someday. I just know it!"

"Laura, don't start matchmaking for a couple of kids," Lorne warned laughingly. "It's just wrong. And anyway, Cara isn't dating until she's thirty. Or forty, maybe."

Laura smiled and leaned up to kiss him. "You really love her, don't you?"

"I can't help it," Lorne said simply. "She's got me wrapped around her little finger. And so do you." He lowered his head to press his lips to her forehead. "There's nothing I wouldn't do for you both."

"I know," Laura answered, closing her eyes at the feel of his lips on her skin. "Evan?"

"Hmm?" Lorne was enjoying the feel of her in his arms, her head on his shoulder. He felt more content than he had in months.

Laura took a deep breath and looked up at him. "I think I'm falling in love with you," she said. "I know I told you that I wasn't ready. I know I told you to wait and not to push me, but I can't help it and now I don't want to help it."

Lorne's response was to crush his lips to hers to shut her up. When he released her, Laura looked a little dazed. He ran a gentle finger along her cheek and smiled. "No rush. Just as long as we're going in the same direction."

Laura smiled back and laid her head on his shoulder again. It looked like things were settling down at last.

* * *

Cara watched her mother kissing Evan and told Torrin. "They're kissing again."

Torrin swung her around so he could look at Laura and Evan. "That is so disgusting." He gave her a panicked look. "I'm not kissing you!"

"Ew!" Cara squealed. "No way are you kissing me!" She let go of his hands and glared at him menacingly. "I'll kick you off the pier if you try!"

"I wouldn't kiss you anyway!" Torrin spat. "I just think it's disgusting the way grown ups are always kissing."

"I don't know," Cara said thoughtfully. "I kinda like it. And now maybe something good will come out of it." Her eyes lit up. "Torrin! It's going to be so great!"

"What is?" Torrin demanded, confused. "Cara?"

She was running towards her mother, giggling wildly as she dodged around Carolyn and Cameron, locked tightly together.

"Looks like she's cut you loose," John told his son, tousling Torrin's dark hair.

"Girls are weird," Torrin declared. "Mama, don't let Lily be a weird girl."

Teyla smiled at her son. "I will do my best. Perhaps you would like to dance with your mother. That is, unless you find me to be too...weird…for you."

Torrin grinned and shook his head. "No! Let's boogie, Mama!"

Cara was back tugging on Lorne's pant leg. "Evan!"

Lorne hoisted her onto his hip and held her securely. "Hey princess, what's up?"

"I saw you kissing Mama," Cara announced. "Are you in love with her?"

Laura blushed. "Cara," she said in a low voice. "That's not polite."

"Nobody tells me anything," Cara grumbled, but she obediently quietened down.

"It's okay, Cara," Lorne reassured her. "Yes, I do love your Mama."

Cara's eyes grew wide with this new information. "Really? What about me? If you marry Mama, will you love me too?"

"I already do," Lorne said quietly. "I couldn't love you more if you were my own little girl."

"So you're not just friends with me to get to Mama?" Cara asked uncertainly. She blushed and looked down at his chest, certain that he would scold her now.

"What?" Lorne asked in disbelief.

"Cara," Laura started at the same time. "Honey…"

"Laura, why don't I take this one?" Lorne stepped back and gave Laura a reassuring smile. He turned his full attention to the little girl in his arms.

"Cara, I don't know where you heard that stuff, but I promise you, it's not true." He tipped her chin up so she was looking at him. "Look at me, sweetheart. You're _my_ princess. Okay?"

That answer seemed to satisfy her, because she nodded. "Okay. You can date Mama now, if you want. I give you my permission"

Lorne began to laugh helplessly. "Where did you hear that?"

"Around, "Cara said vaguely. She looked at Laura, who was watching their interaction with amusement. "Mama, I have given Evan permission to date you."

Laura laughed. "That's nice, baby."

"You can hold her hand in the mess hall and kiss her goodnight," Cara continued excitedly. "Rodney says that it's allowed to do that for an appropriate length of time."

Laura's laughter became uncontrollable. "He...he did?"

"And then after that you can get married," Cara concluded triumphantly. She frowned. "Evan, stop laughing at me. Mama, it's not funny! It's going to be so great. And then you know what?"

"What?" Laura managed, struggling furiously to stop laughing.

"Then I can have a baby brother!"

**And there you have it. I do hope that the Jack/Sam shippers are happy with it. It's hard to get the balance right. Please let me know if you love it, hate it, want me to delete it permanently.... Just be gentle with me. I have flu and I may cry! **

**Eva.**


End file.
